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Man with the 132-Pound Scrotum


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#121

Muffyn

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Posted Aug 22, 2013 @ 9:10 PM

Now I'm thinking of Warren having a pre-surgery porn career and working as a feature dancer.  A little scro-dazzling, some tassles and he could get that thing swinging. 


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#122

Lola16

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Posted Aug 22, 2013 @ 9:44 PM

I saw the title to this thread the other night and was thinking... is this a series?  Then by chance, I happen about the show on TLC so I watch it.  Amazing.  It was like a bad SNL sketch.  I was a little concerned when Warren didn't wake up right away.  There was a show about an overweight woman who had the bypass surgery who was young and she didn't make it out of the hospital.  

Perhaps Warren could have gone on America's Got Talent --- I'm sure this would have been right up Stern's alley.


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#123

CoCoYoYo

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Posted Aug 22, 2013 @ 10:06 PM

Perhaps Warren could have gone on America's Got Talent ---I'm sure this would have been right up Stern's alley.


Warren did appear on Stern's radio show last year. I think that appearance is what got the [ahem] ball rolling for this show.
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#124

bilgistic

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Posted Aug 22, 2013 @ 10:17 PM

The movie is about vagina dentata.

Teeth is freaking fantastic! It's dark, dark satire about a teenaged girl who has, well, teeth in her vagina. Many articles have been written on the film--about how it's a feminist response to rape culture. Beyond that, it's just hilariously dark, if you like that sort of thing, and I do.

 

It's not available streaming on Netflix. Booo! Amazon has it via Instant Video to rent ($1.99) or buy ($9.99). Not for kids!


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#125

lu1wml

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Posted Aug 22, 2013 @ 11:15 PM

  But if I do any more of these kinds of Bing searches, my targeted ads will drive me away from the internet forever.

 

 

That's so true, and don't forget to delete your history.


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#126

QueBueno

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Posted Aug 22, 2013 @ 11:26 PM

I can't help but think that this show missed the natural choice for a soundtrack. That, of course, would be the immortal song by AC/DC, "Big Balls". Except that, technically, there was just one big ball.
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#127

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Posted Aug 22, 2013 @ 11:42 PM

I can't help but think that this show missed the natural choice for a soundtrack. That, of course, would be the immortal song by AC/DC, "Big Balls".

 

Or even the classic "My Nuts" by the Fat Boys. Then of course there's the much lesser known "The Scrotum Song" by The Asylum Street Spankers ( listen to it here: http://www.youtube.c...h?v=Epz7WbhpHZo ).

 

Or how about "My 132-Pound Scrotum" by Scrotum 132? Ok, I made that last one up. But not the first two.


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#128

Muffyn

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Posted Aug 22, 2013 @ 11:43 PM

Really it was one big bag.  He had two normal-sized balls.  Perhaps he's just really into purses?


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#129

JCVinEden

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Posted Aug 23, 2013 @ 7:04 AM

Now I'm thinking of Warren having a pre-surgery porn career and working as a feature dancer.


I wonder what "Warren dancing" would actually look like? I'm thinking a weeble.

Really it was one big bag. He had two normal-sized balls.


That's just cruel. Now I'm starting to understand all his frustration, and I'm not even a dude. An angry, inch-long penis, two pea-sized balls rattling around in a blimp-sized scrotum... He got absolutely no manly benefit out of having a giant nutsack.
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#130

ShowtimeSynergy

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Posted Aug 23, 2013 @ 7:21 AM

Or even the classic "My Nuts" by the Fat Boys. Then of course there's the much lesser known "The Scrotum Song" by The Asylum Street Spankers ( listen to it here: http://www.youtube.c...h?v=Epz7WbhpHZo ).

 

Or how about "My 132-Pound Scrotum" by Scrotum 132? Ok, I made that last one up. But not the first two.

 

Don't forget the classic Chuck Berry "My Ding a Ling".


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#131

walnutqueen

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Posted Aug 23, 2013 @ 8:44 AM

 

  But if I do any more of these kinds of Bing searches, my targeted ads will drive me away from the internet forever.

 

 

That's so true, and don't forget to delete your history.

 

 

lu1wnl, but if I die under suspicious circumstances, the forensic investigators will find that shit in a heartbeat.  Then y'all can watch my sad story on the ID channel ... The victim was a reclusive old cat lady who spent her time watching tv and on a website about tv, until her last days when she seems to have developed a fascination with male genitalia.  Police believe met a very bad man with whom she had a wicked attraction.

 

You'll have some 'splainin' to do then, misterbfd!

 


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#132

JBL228

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Posted Aug 23, 2013 @ 10:17 AM

but if I die under suspicious circumstances, the forensic investigators will find that shit in a heartbeat.  Then y'all can watch my sad story on the ID channel ... The victim was a reclusive old cat lady who spent her time watching tv and on a website about tv, until her last days when she seems to have developed a fascination with male genitalia.  Police believe met a very bad man with whom she had a wicked attraction.

 

And with the username, WalnutQueen? Oy. The police will say you were one genitalia-obsessed cat lady.



Okay, completely OT, but was this done for the squasher's sexual pleasure or the squashee's sexual pleasure?

 

Squashee's get pleasure, and the squasher gets paid.


Edited by JBL228, Aug 23, 2013 @ 10:15 AM.

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#133

walnutqueen

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Posted Aug 23, 2013 @ 12:19 PM

JBL228 - how the fuck do you know that "walnutqueen " was an affectionate nickname given to my unmentionable by an ex that's been gone for over a decade?  You are either a witch or a Homeland Security plant! 

 

The police will say you were one genitalia-obsessed cat lady.
 

ETA:  HEE!  I've seen more genitalia than you could shake a stick at (Queen of  Wreck Beach back in the day) and I can assure you that the anatomy of a male (or female, for that matter)  holds no attraction/obsession for me!  They can deduce whatever they want from my trusty old back massager.


Edited by walnutqueen, Aug 23, 2013 @ 1:36 PM.

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#134

JBL228

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Posted Aug 23, 2013 @ 2:33 PM

A ha ha ha...WalnutQueen too funny.

 

As I read your post about your hard-drive and all the testicular information that would be found, I couldn't help but think of  walnuts as I saw your username. I then made the connection that walnuts can at times look like scrotums - ridges and all. LOL  WalNUTQueen. 

 

That's just cruel. Now I'm starting to understand all his frustration, and I'm not even a dude. An angry, inch-long penis, two pea-sized balls rattling around in a blimp-sized scrotum... He got absolutely no manly benefit out of having a giant nutsack.

 

True! But boy did he try to yank that sac back from the surgeon for financial purposes.


Edited by JBL228, Aug 23, 2013 @ 2:36 PM.

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#135

bilgistic

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Posted Aug 23, 2013 @ 2:54 PM

He got absolutely no manly benefit out of having a giant nutsack.

Because there's usually a "manly benefit"? (Yeah, I get testosterone and baby batter, but really, guys, while I can't speak for homosexual men, hetero women don't care about your balls. Really. The most I've ever thought about balls has been this week, because of this show. And that's been more than the sum total of the rest of my 38 years on the planet!)

 

lu1wnl, but if I die under suspicious circumstances, the forensic investigators will find that shit in a heartbeat.  Then y'all can watch my sad story on the ID channel ... The victim was a reclusive old cat lady who spent her time watching tv and on a website about tv, until her last days when she seems to have developed a fascination with male genitalia.  Police believe met a very bad man with whom she had a wicked attraction.

Are you me, walnutqueen??


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#136

JCVinEden

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Posted Aug 23, 2013 @ 3:08 PM

Because there's usually a "manly benefit"?


Ha! I really have no idea. Every man I've done the deed with was facinated by his scrotum, and seemed to think I should be too. Warren was very protective of his nutsack as some sort of pathway to sexytime. And my sister's dog likes his own balls (and I'm assuming scrotum too).
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#137

walnutqueen

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Posted Aug 23, 2013 @ 3:23 PM

Deleted my post because I went rogue, and apologize to everyone for derailing this thread. 


Edited by walnutqueen, Aug 23, 2013 @ 5:28 PM.

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#138

misterbfd

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Posted Aug 23, 2013 @ 3:43 PM

After reading the last series of posts, all I can add is:

 

"Boy, that guy on this show sure had a big nutsack!"


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#139

bilgistic

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Posted Aug 23, 2013 @ 3:51 PM

Every man I've done the deed with was facinated by his scrotum, and seemed to think I should be too.

This!

 

MC Hammer should have sold his old pants to Warren. It would've helped with MC Hammer's money troubles and we wouldn't have had to see the sac peekin' through the hoodie hole.


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#140

SunShine Gal

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Posted Aug 23, 2013 @ 4:33 PM

I wonder if TLC will do a follow-up show on Warren a year from now, Life Without My 132-pound Scrotum.  

 

"My roommate moved out 2 weeks after my surgery. That's when I realized he is gay and had a fetish for tv trays."

"I found out he was caught dumpster diving for medical waste outside the hospital."

 

"I was surprised when my book Keep Your Eye On The Ball landed me interviews on The Today Show and The View."

 

"My life is gonna be made into a tv-movie. Ben Stiller wants to produce it and call it Night At The Hospital. Chris Tucker and Jackie Chan will play me and my roommate."


Edited by SunShine Gal, Aug 23, 2013 @ 4:55 PM.

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#141

TWoP Howard

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Posted Aug 23, 2013 @ 5:06 PM

Back to discussing the show instead of user names, please. If you have a personal question for another poster, take it to PM rather than asking in the thread. Finally, yes, if you aren't watching the show, you have no reason to post in the thread. Thanks.

#142

JBL228

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Posted Aug 23, 2013 @ 5:08 PM

Regarding Warren:

 

"My life is gonna be made into a tv-movie. Ben Stiller wants to produce it and call it 'Night At The Hospital'. Chris Tucker and Jackie Chan will play me and my roommate."

 

As I got to this part of your post, I swore I was gonna read:

 

"...Chris Tucker and Jackie Chan will play me and my scrotum."

 

Warren was very protective of his nutsack as some sort of pathway to sexytime

 

Don't forget, it was his very own dinner table too. When Warren was of the belief that his penis was that large, noticeable groove on top of his scrotum, I was actually thinking that it was the outline of his dinner plate that he had placed there for the last four years.


Edited by JBL228, Aug 23, 2013 @ 5:25 PM.

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#143

SunShine Gal

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Posted Aug 23, 2013 @ 5:20 PM

"...Chris Tucker and Jackie Chan will play me and my scrotum."

Yes! Jackie Chan is about that size, isn't he? AND, he wore a hoodie in the movie Karate Kid!


Edited by SunShine Gal, Aug 23, 2013 @ 5:23 PM.

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#144

JBL228

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Posted Aug 23, 2013 @ 5:25 PM

Jackie Chan is about that size, isn't he? AND, he wore a hoodie in the movie Karate Kid!

 

Yes he did wear one! OMG LOL


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#145

HelloPatti

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Posted Aug 23, 2013 @ 7:53 PM

I actually did watch part of this show (although I didn't get the hoodie deal because I missed the beginning, dang that's resourceful) and maybe I missed it but just one question. . . maybe I'll throw it out for the men in our merry bunch - why would he wait until his scrotum made it to 132 pounds? I'm not a man, but I think if I had a ten pound scrotum, I'd be at the Minute Clinic waiting on those hard plastic chairs right away. Did he just not pay attention to it until he started to run out of hoodies to fit, or is he like those Hoarder people that eventually doesn't see all the empty pizza boxes and dead sailcats on the floor or was he maybe trying for some kind of world record? Does Guinness even have a category for "World's Biggest Nut sack?"


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#146

JBL228

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Posted Aug 23, 2013 @ 8:20 PM

maybe I missed it but just one question. . . maybe I'll throw it out for the men in our merry bunch - why would he wait until his scrotum made it to 132 pounds

 

Warren visited a doctor when the scrotum was hurting and it had begun to swell. He was put on antibiotics. It didn't work. He went to other doctors who put him on different meds with no results. Mind you, as each day passed, it would grow.  Another doctor told him surgery was the only option, but it would mean castration and having to pee out of a tube. That was the deal breaker for him. Warren mentions not wanting to lose his penis because he will no longer be able to have sex. In other words, better for the scrotum to get bigger rather than pee out of a tube and have no sex in the future. Apparently Warren's need for sex was a priority. Also, Warren was on disability. His medical insurance wouldn't cover any medical expenses outside of the state of Nevada. The doctors he visited in Nevada didn't have any suggestions other than surgery. By this time, Warren was afraid because, according to what a doctor told him, being under anesthesia for nine hours could kill him. I don't think he was that afraid by the time he visited the  Howard Stern show and begged for financial help from the Stern listeners so he could pay for the surgery. He happened to raise $2,000. Certainly not enough for the surgery. Warren then visited a doctor in Irvine, California who was willing to do the surgery for free. I was not clear if only the surgeon would do it free since there are hospital fees, the anesthesiologist's fees, and other hospital-related costs. This doctor told Warren that there are risks with surgery, but with the scrotum getting bigger, it was at the point where it might eventually kill him because Warren had other medical issues he was dealing with aside from the huge sack he was carrying. The doctor also assured him that there was a possibility that there would be no need for castration.


Edited by JBL228, Aug 23, 2013 @ 8:27 PM.

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#147

Lola16

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Posted Aug 23, 2013 @ 9:08 PM

I'm sure Warren can go on Biggest Loser or another weight loss show if he still has the fame bug.


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#148

misterbfd

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Posted Aug 23, 2013 @ 9:57 PM

From "Biggest Scrotum" to "Biggest Loser".


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#149

HelloPatti

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Posted Aug 24, 2013 @ 8:09 PM

JBL -thanks for the clarification. I didn't catch the beginning of the show, so that makes a little more sense. I guess personally I would have just wacked everything off and peed with a tube instead of hauling my junk around in a hoodie, but I'm a chick. I'm sure guys feel differently. 


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#150

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Posted Aug 24, 2013 @ 9:31 PM

Why, exactly, does TLC bother with the pixelation to blur it out?  I can still see it!!!


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