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Celebrity Splash (Australia)


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#1

purist

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Posted Apr 24, 2013 @ 1:16 AM

I gotta say I'm looking forward to this, which starts next Monday at 7.30pm on Channel 7. It's going to be so bad it's good. My main reason for watching is that apparently Olympic gold medallist Matthew Mitcham is a judge, and I LOVE him. The contestants are the usual bunch of B and C (and D) list, including a Home and Away actor and some eye candy:
  • retired Olympic swimmer Leisel Jones
  • cricketer Andrew Symonds
  • Olympic athlete Tamsyn Lewis
  • surfer [surfer? also 'Bra Boy' and thug!] Koby Abberton
  • former AFL player Andrew Welsh
  • Perth's Miss Universe Australia Renae Ayris
  • 'TV icon' Denise Drysdale
  • comedian Josh Thomas
  • Fat Pizza star Paul Fenech
  • comedian and radio host Adam Richard
  • socialite Brynne Edelsten
  • TV presenter Laura Csortan
  • model Nick Bracks
  • Home and Away's Demi Harman.
The show doesn't appear to have an official website, which is odd. Here is an interview from today's Daily Terror with Brynne Edelsten (for whom I have a sneaking fondness), which gets into the issue of how her breast implants could end up under her arms if she 'lands wrong'. /o\

#2

SnideAsides

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Posted Apr 24, 2013 @ 1:20 AM

Yay for Nick Bracks in Speedos! I guess aside from that (and St. Matty) I'm mostly looking forward to Denise (awesome) and maybe Josh Thomas? The rest I range from "who?" to "Whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy?"

#3

purist

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Posted Apr 24, 2013 @ 1:26 AM

Oh! The other judges are Winter Olympian Alisa Camplin and US Olympic diver (and trainer on US Celebrity Splash) Greg Louganis. Two gay male judges and two gay male contestants - gotta love that!

Here is a pretty good interview from today's West Australian with Leisel Jones about the show.

#4

Kromm

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Posted Apr 24, 2013 @ 4:22 AM

Wow is it a bad bet to go ahead with this when the US version has almost killed a few people.

#5

JontheAussieBoy

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Posted Apr 24, 2013 @ 5:14 AM

Now, I'm gonna come out and say it. I'm excited about this. Should be good for a laugh or two.

Also, Nick Bracks, Andrew Welsh and strangely, Andrew Symonds? *swoon*

#6

katisha66

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Posted Apr 24, 2013 @ 6:48 AM

I see we have a few recycled DWTS contestants in there!

#7

purist

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Posted Apr 29, 2013 @ 10:10 AM

Oh good lord but this show is terrible. Way too much talking and not enough diving, cheesy dramatic music and lights, and mostly boring and/or horrible 'celebrities'. Tamsyn Lewis was fairly likeable and Josh Thomas was cute, but the others ranged from insufferable (Pauly Fenech) to I've-Already-Forgotten-Her-Name (the chick in the red swimsuit). I love Brynne in all her glorious tackiness and was glad to see her actually do quite a good dive.

As for the judges, Matthew Mitcham was predictably gorgeous, especially in his nerdy glasses (but I wish he hadn't used 'little girl' as an insult); Alisa Camplin was boring as batshit; and Greg Louganis was disappointingly meh.

The show was meant to go for 90 minutes but it went for over two hours. I thought it was never going to end. Don't know if I can bear to watch another episode.

Edited by purist, Apr 29, 2013 @ 10:12 AM.


#8

nozycat

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Posted Apr 29, 2013 @ 7:49 PM

Hee, I enjoyed it, easy to amuse here. Then also I always record these sorts of shows and watch them on half fast forward so it only takes me half the time to watch them. My only gripes, I thought Greg way underscored Josh, whom I love, and they all overscored the guy who was a replacement and Brynne whose going higher seemed so staged to me, though she did dive well, and Pauly Fenech - have never come across him before and hope never to again. But in general I thought it was very entertaining in all its cheesy and tacky glory and will watch the rest of it.

#9

cousin oliver

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Posted Apr 30, 2013 @ 1:08 AM

Come back, Everybody Dance Now, all is forgiven.

The direction was incredibly slapdash - when the contestants were introduced they ran past the camera so fast I had even less idea of who the hell they were. Even worse, the dramatic closeups of the divers faces before they leapt obscured the beginning of their dives. Luckily I DVRed so I only wasted fifteen minutes of my life (my DVR cut out just as Brynne was introduced, proving even an electronic device has its limits).

Edited by cousin oliver, Apr 30, 2013 @ 1:09 AM.


#10

braggtastic

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Posted Apr 30, 2013 @ 11:29 AM

Is this show live in Australia? Splash is still airing in the US & Greg Louganis is on our show too. I know ours is taped in advance, but I've heard about one contestant being hospitalized & that hasn't yet come up on the show, so I don't know how far in advanced it's taped. I can't imagine Louganis is commuting to do both shows at once.

#11

SnideAsides

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Posted Apr 30, 2013 @ 10:57 PM

I believe so, yes.

I'm sure it's entirely coincidental that a Sydney-based audience didn't warm to an AFL player immediately. Let's be honest, even with the pink Speedo Andrew Welsh's only chance of surviving would have been to tell Matt "If you give me tens, I'll '9 your eight."

I'm glad they sped up the show last night and fixed up some of the camera angles - the underwater one the first night made it look like Brynne was about an inch away from cracking her skull open on the bottom of the pool, and she didn't even jump from the highest board.

Larry and Kylie still suck though - it looks like this is going to go down on his long line of TV failures. He's turning into the male equivalent of Jackie O.

Edited by SnideAsides, Apr 30, 2013 @ 11:47 PM.


#12

purist

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Posted May 1, 2013 @ 1:54 AM

"If you give me tens, I'll '9 your eight."

Is this a filthy gay joke, snideasides? I don't get it - please explain. (I know you are gay, so I have no shame in asking this question!)

I only caught a few minutes of last night's show. Can someone please do a quick recap for me? How was Adam Richard? And Denise Drysdale?

Edited by purist, May 1, 2013 @ 1:55 AM.


#13

SnideAsides

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Posted May 1, 2013 @ 2:29 AM

Adam and Denise both made it through before the sudden-death round. Adam had on Kylie-esque gold spandex board shorts and told Other Kylie to get the fuck off the diving platform (not in so many words, of course) and Denise did a pindrop dive from 5m that actually wasn't too bad - most of the splash seemed to come from the shape of her body than from any diving errors.

That dickhead surfer guy jumped from ten metres and basically had a whole "Heights? Pshaw. Crowds? Eeeeeeek!" thing prepared in order to get enough public votes to qualify.

Is this a filthy gay joke, snideasides? I don't get it - please explain. (I know you are gay, so I have no shame in asking this question!)


Yes. Would it help if I replaced the apostrophe before the 9 with a 6 and pointed out the eight was deliberately written before the double-quotation/inch marks?

#14

purist

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Posted May 1, 2013 @ 4:12 AM

Oh. Hee!

So who is the bigger dickhead? Pauly Fenech or Koby Abberton?

#15

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Posted May 1, 2013 @ 4:26 AM

Pauly, definitely. I mean, there's no doubt Koby's a dickhead, but at least he seems to have a sense of humour about himself. Pauly's as toxic as Alan Jones.

#16

SnideAsides

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Posted May 7, 2013 @ 10:11 PM

And cancelled. Well, kind of. The second semi-final has been axed, and it'll be aired at the start of the finale next Thursday instead.

 

How many shows is this Larry has got cancelled now? I mean, Family Double Dare, The Main Event, The Price is Right (three times!), Wheel of Fortune, Cash Bonanza, Celebrity Dog School... and I still feel like I'm missing something. He's like the male Tacky Ho.



#17

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Posted May 8, 2013 @ 6:05 PM

I don't know if you can blame Larry per se, for this one. Kylie Gillies is an awful, awful host and keeps talking about herself.

 

The whole format is very rushed and yet each episode still feels like it's dragging. That's quite a skill for any show to achieve, really.



#18

purist

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Posted May 9, 2013 @ 7:42 AM

Excellent article about the show and its failure in today's Age Green Guide.

''Rubbish television'' is nothing less than an undeserved compliment for this monstrous concoction, which may well be remembered as the television show that made The Celebrity Apprentice look like a sober model of compelling docudrama.



#19

purist

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Posted May 16, 2013 @ 5:22 AM

The only reason to tune into the final tonight is that Matthew Mitcham and Greg Louganis are going to do a dive together. Click the link to see a nice (hot) photo.