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My House, Your Money: Mommy and Daddy are Paying for the Granite and Hardwood


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#1

selkie

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Posted Nov 17, 2011 @ 6:10 PM

My House, Your Money recently started showing in the US, and based on the first episode, I'm willing to think it's a spiritual heir of Buy Me- overly entitled homebuyers that you're going to have very uncharitable thoughts about midway through the intro. I seem to have caught "A Dog Owner Needs Play Space"- she's a 25 year old dog agent for film & tv getting $50K from her dad as a down payment so she can buy a $300K starter townhouse somewhere in Canada. And in addition to the down payment, Dad (who granted seems to like that kind of thing) will also provide all non-technical labor for her new place.

It would be one thing if we get the sense that the kids are genuinely appreciative of the parent contribution in this all, but any mention of that seems tacked on at the end, and instead we get lots of low grade bickering between parent and child, probably at the urging of a producer. Though it does make for entertaining television, I guess.

#2

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Posted Nov 17, 2011 @ 7:28 PM

selkie I saw that episode also, and neither father nor daughter came across well. I also saw another one where mom and dad were helping their son, an aspiring actor, buy a condo in LA. The parents were the ones who came across as unreasonable, I thought. The mom insisted on 2 bedrooms so they'd have a place to stay when they came to visit on weekends, and also it needed a balcony. The first place they looked at was a loft and the dad kept commenting on it wasn't finished, you could see the air ducts. Never heard of a loft, dad? In the end he got what he wanted in a location he wanted that was one bedroom. Mom's solution? Son can sleep on a futon while they take the bedroom when they come to visit.

Were they planning on visiting every weekend? Good grief - the kid was of age, give him some space. We've given our children financial help - our stance is once we decided how much and ask it go for a certain cause/need, their choice of the particulars is just that - theirs. Our daughter has a good friend whose in-laws gave them money for a house. She said she had absolutely no say in what house got picked. I guess you can say - well, mom and dad are paying. Guess what - the house the parents chose was the one closest to theirs. Poor kids.

#3

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Posted Nov 17, 2011 @ 9:17 PM

Oh, I did not like the aspiring actor. He wanted what he wanted and he didn't care what his parents or his twin had to say. He acted like the spacious place was a senior housing complex. Go ahead, pick a tiny place. If we ever see you again, it will be when you're looking for a larger place because his current place is just too smaaaaallll.

#4

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Posted Nov 17, 2011 @ 9:29 PM

I assumed the actor was somewhere in Toronto. Everyone had a Canadian accent you could cut with a knife. I also assumed he came on the show to help his career. Too bad he was neither good-looking, funny, or charming. His twin brother was though.

But I do assume the show encourages that ridiculous bickering. I can't tell if Canadian producers encourage this ridiculous behavior so they can sell the shows to the US, or if Canucks are as ridiculous as we are.

ETA: I much preferred "My Parents House". That show was so fun and often sweet.

Edited by whee whee piggy, Nov 17, 2011 @ 9:30 PM.


#5

Linky Loo

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Posted Nov 17, 2011 @ 10:04 PM

I much preferred "My Parents House". That show was so fun and often sweet.

I miss that show. Where are you Andrika and Emmanuel? This show could use your warmth and humor. Yes, there was bickering, but there was also affection.

#6

dustylil

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Posted Nov 17, 2011 @ 10:21 PM

I also saw another one where mom and dad were helping their son, an aspiring actor, buy a condo in LA.

Unless there were two episodes featuring a pushy set of parents and a whiny, spineless son, I'm pretty sure this was set in Toronto. The condo building where the son ended up, looked like it was close to Lake Ontario.

#7

selkie

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Posted Nov 17, 2011 @ 11:05 PM

I'm assuming the Dog Whisperess was Toronto as well since prices seemed a little too reasonable to be Vancouver.

#8

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Posted Nov 18, 2011 @ 1:13 PM

I wanted to slap the cousin in the 'dog whisperer' ep. I was screaming 'shut up, bitch' at the cousin during the show because she was more annoying to me than either the father or the daughter...and that's saying a lot!

#9

BDArizona

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Posted Nov 19, 2011 @ 10:43 PM

Were they planning on visiting every weekend? Good grief - the kid was of age, give him some space. We've given our children financial help - our stance is once we decided how much and ask it go for a certain cause/need, their choice of the particulars is just that - theirs. Our daughter has a good friend whose in-laws gave them money for a house. She said she had absolutely no say in what house got picked. I guess you can say - well, mom and dad are paying. Guess what - the house the parents chose was the one closest to theirs. Poor kids.

I agree so completely with this. If you choose to give your kids help, it is your choice. That doesn't mean you get to make the decisions. To me, giving people money, then insisting that you get to make or influence their decisions as a result, is nothing more than using your money to control those people. My parents helped us a lot, and never imposed their opinions as a result. We've done the same with our adult daughter. To do otherwise is just gross. It's almost like teaching your children to whore themselves. That's why the whole idea of this show just turns me off.

Edited by BDArizona, Nov 19, 2011 @ 10:43 PM.


#10

Richko

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Posted Nov 21, 2011 @ 12:43 PM

The US pilot episode was the best 30 min. of HGTV I've seen in a long time -- the Polish immigrant parents with the tall son in med school... I would watch those two parents in a sitcom -- they were hilarious and charming and all sorts of awesome!

The parents of the aspiring actor were the complete opposite. Especially the father -- I think he was trying to ham it up for TV but all he achieved was giving me a stomachache. What a repulsive "performance" that was. "Cha-ching, cha-ching!" Bleah.

Edited by Richko, Nov 21, 2011 @ 12:43 PM.


#11

Paula in Playa

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Posted Nov 21, 2011 @ 3:50 PM

Yes, I totally loved the Polish (?) parents. Adorable.

Unless there were two episodes featuring a pushy set of parents and a whiny, spineless son, I'm pretty sure this was set in Toronto.


And I can tell you definitely was not L.A.

#12

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Posted Nov 23, 2011 @ 11:39 AM

Did anyone see the one from last night with the overly spoiled son with his parents and step mother?? Wow theft was the most awkward half hour I've seen. They just randomly bring up the fact that his agent was also a swimsuit model, and we got a shot of her in one too! I think they were all told to Ham it up because it was extremely over the top. It felt really staged and fake, like it was a spoof of itself.

#13

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Posted Nov 23, 2011 @ 3:13 PM

Oh, this is easily the most annoying show I've ever seen. Here's a thought for these buyers: stop whining about what your parents will and will not pay for. Get out of your parents' house the minute you graduate college if not before and get a junky apartment in the part of the city you want to live in, if possible. Save up your money until you get a couple of promotions and a downpayment that you will then put on a property that probably doesn't include a guest bedroom for mumsie and daddy or a "man cave" for all of your friends. Dream and save a bit longer and finally buy that place you really want. And give your parents the satisfaction of seeing that you can take care of yourself, and that you won't break to bits if you live in a place without stainless steel appliances.

#14

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Posted Nov 24, 2011 @ 12:41 AM

To be honest, I doubt many of these parents would get any satisfaction from seeing their kids be self-sufficient. I'm getting the feeling that having something to hold over their kids is much more in line with the way they operate. If you want to give your kids money and help, that's awesome. I have no problems with that help being offered or accepted. If parents want to give their kids money only so they can tell them what to do, I have a much bigger problem with the parent than the child in that scenario.

#15

LuckyBitch

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Posted Nov 24, 2011 @ 10:54 PM

The US pilot episode was the best 30 min. of HGTV I've seen in a long time -- the Polish immigrant parents with the tall son in med school... I would watch those two parents in a sitcom -- they were hilarious and charming and all sorts of awesome!

They were funny! That was the first episode that I caught, when I just happened upon it late one night. Since then, I've seen the other three episodes, including the one that just aired with the spoiled son and his divorced parents, step-mother, and grandmother all along for the house hunting. While I found the first episode with the med school son funny, I now realize that the bickering in the car routine is a formula set up by the show in each episode.

Btw, I just noticed that the first three episodes are all on tomorrow beginning at 11 am (Episode 1 - med school son, Ep 2- actor son, and Ep 3 - dog trainer daughter).

Next week's new episode (Tuesday, 11/29 at 8:30 PM) brings us the first married couple looking for a home with financial help from the parents:

Tracey and Dave Look For Their First Home With Parental Help

HMHYM-105H
Tracey and Dave are a young, engaged couple who want to buy their first home. Tracey's mom, Joan, is a control-freak, and though contributing substantially to the down payment, wants veto power over what property they choose. Dave's dad,

Also, in case there was any doubt, much of the drama is manufactured. HGTV's website describes the show as:

My House, Your Money reveals what really goes on behind closed doors as prospective homebuyers turn to their extended family members for financial help in order to land their dream home. Cameras catch all the drama and high-stakes pressure of the classic generational tug of war as families fight for their property pick and struggle to come to a compromise. What could possibly go wrong when the grown-up kids want a beautiful home to live in and the parents want a safe place to invest their money?



#16

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Posted Nov 25, 2011 @ 3:15 AM

I keep seeing commercials for this and I hate the commercials so I'm pretty sure I'll hate the show. Especially the one with the lady in the turqouise (sp?) shirt that says something to the effect, 'they're not getting any of my money if i don't like it.' Whatever lady! I agree with the posters here that say don't give money and then make demands on how the money is spent. That's just stupid.

#17

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Posted Nov 26, 2011 @ 6:08 AM

What could possibly go wrong when the grown-up kids want a beautiful home to live in and the parents want a safe place to invest their money?

Admittedly, I haven't paid tons of attention when I've caught this show, but is this really an accurate description of what is going on? To me, there are two different scenarios possible here - either a.) the parents are buying a home as an investment, and the parents keep the deed while agreeing to let their kids live there rent free or b.) the parents are buying the home (or contributing a down payment) as a gift and the kids keep the deed. I guess some might seeing it as splitting hairs, but to me there is a significant difference between those two scenarios in how much "say so" the parents should get. In scenario a, I think the parents should have the most say in what house gets purchased, but in scenario b, I don't think they should get any voice - a gift is a gift, no strings attached. So which is it?

#18

macster83

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Posted Nov 29, 2011 @ 9:04 PM

Wow. While the mom in this latest episode was pretty annoying, the daughter was a real piece of work. I really wish the mom would have stood her ground and not contributed any additional funds. Guess that's what happens when you spoil your kid though.

And the boyfriend? What a waste of space. He wasn't contributing anything in the way of money or personality.

All 3 of the house choices were pretty crappy. Should have called Carlos!

#19

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Posted Nov 29, 2011 @ 9:43 PM

I think this is the first time I've seen the whole show. Wow!! I thought the mother was something but than they went around looking at houses, and the daughter was seriously annoying. When Tracey was talking about how mom had been generous before, I thought this is why she is such a bitch now, mom. You made her what she is, a whiny, pain in the rear. I thought, just look at the two of them, if I was that guy I would have moved on, not that he was all that great. I see why Tracey is with him, because he's a pushover. He obviously got that from dad.

I like the first house only if they could do something about that loft, and put some windows in it. Otherwise, I thought they should have kept looking.

#20

BoDiva

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Posted Nov 29, 2011 @ 10:01 PM

a.) the parents are buying a home as an investment, and the parents keep the deed while agreeing to let their kids live there rent free

But property isn't really an investment if you aren't collecting rent. Its appreciation historically is not enough to qualify as an investment with the carrying costs--mortgage, maintenance, taxes. And now, with virtually no appreciation in most markets, it's a loss leader.

If you need help with a down payment, borrow it--with signed documents--from mom and dad. But better yet, wait until you can afford it yourself. And buy what you can reasonably afford. The idea that everyone is entitled to a dream house (ever, let alone as a first house) is ludicrous.

Edited by BoDiva, Nov 29, 2011 @ 10:03 PM.


#21

Linky Loo

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Posted Nov 29, 2011 @ 10:05 PM

Should have called Carlos!

Carlos has to be extremely happy that he didn't get the call.

#22

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Posted Nov 29, 2011 @ 10:06 PM

It's clear the apple didn't fall far from the tree! While the mother was seriously annoying, I thought she was spot on about the location of the first house. You can change the interior of the house all you want, but if its on an ugly commercial street, it won't appreciate in value as much as a house on a nice, residential street. I'm sure that on Friday and Saturday nights, the area around that liquor store across the street isn't very quiet. Yes, I detected what might have been some racism in her remarks when she spoke about the location of the first house, or maybe it was just culture shock, coming from the burbs, but that house really wasn't a good investment.
The daughter was just an entitled brat. When we bought our second house, I waited five years before redoing a kitchen that was considerably worse than the one in the house they bought. Somehow, I survived with my delicate sensibilites intact (sarcasm!)

Edited by jerseydevil, Nov 29, 2011 @ 10:13 PM.


#23

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Posted Nov 30, 2011 @ 12:42 AM

That was a very unpleasant show tonight. I had seen the ads and figured the mom was getting a bad edit, and probably wasn't that bad. Then she WAS that bad! The more I watched, I began to dislike the daughter even more. She had to disagree with whatever her mom said, just to be spiteful. I couldn't believe she refused to live in that house without a new kitchen and bathroom!! Definitely spoiled and entitled.

I was hoping her fiance might change his mind about marrying her. And future father-in-law can't be too happy about her either. Yikes.

#24

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Posted Nov 30, 2011 @ 12:51 AM

Was the daughter kidding or what when she suggested they go to mom's accountant and see what mom could really contribute? I thought she was serious and I would have walked away - see how you do with no money, you ungrateful bitch!

If mom really wanted to have a say, she should have said 'no wedding, no money.' I know people live together before marriage, but since she said she wished they had waited, she should have held on to her money. Who knows if these two prize winners will get married? I think mom was engaging in some wishful thinking - if they get the house, maybe they'll get married. But again, who knows?

Was there a reason why this awful woman and her cowed fiance couldn't get a nice condo in the city? Why were they looking at houses that were either too expensive or needed some serious work considering the price.

#25

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Posted Nov 30, 2011 @ 9:53 AM

If mom really wanted to have a say, she should have said 'no wedding, no money.


Oh, she had a say alright! To me, it looked like Mom was more interested in giving her daughter a hand in getting a starter home than getting married to that non-entity the daughter called a boyfriend. Mom was not impressed with boyfriend or daddy/realtor at all.

#26

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Posted Nov 30, 2011 @ 12:30 PM

I think it was only going to be her house. The fiance said at the start that he wasn't contributing anything. His dad was just donating his fee to the cause since I get his son was going to be living there. I don't know. He seemed like a bit of a bum.

#27

bibliophiletoo

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Posted Nov 30, 2011 @ 1:33 PM

The fiance's father was donating $10,000 in addition to his commission.

#28

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Posted Nov 30, 2011 @ 5:06 PM

The US pilot episode was the best 30 min. of HGTV I've seen in a long time -- the Polish immigrant parents with the tall son in med school


I loved the mother, especially when she crept out on to the balcony!! You can't fake that kind of fear of heights! They just seemed to have a terrific relationship. The dad was very funny too. I like his suggestion for the shower. Just cut a hole in the ceiling for your head.

Some of the housing they show in Canada is lovely but those semi detached and detached homes they showed on this show and on Property Virgins and a few other Candian based shows... there is hardly a couple of feet between one house and the next. There must be little to no natural light coming in to some of the rooms. For 4/500K I'd want a bit more room.

#29

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Posted Nov 30, 2011 @ 6:44 PM

I think because a lot of these shows are filmed in and around the greater Toronto area, it is an older city with lots that have been divided over and over again to get the highest number of people and houses in the more desirable areas. If they filmed in newer towns and areas that are farther out from the main cities you would find larger lots. I live about an hour north east of Vancouver, and most of the houses in my area are on 60' wide lots. Vancouver lots average about 33', so houses are really close together.

On topic. I wish I could have gotten my parents to chip in for my house, but since they didn't, I never bought my own place until I was 37. Being a homeowner in the lower mainland of BC without inheriting something or buying something tiny and expensive is hard to do. I have no experience with out east, but I imagine Toronto is similar.

#30

whee whee piggy

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Posted Nov 30, 2011 @ 11:00 PM

The fiance's father was donating $10,000 in addition to his commission.


Is the process different in CN from the US? In the US, the buyer does not pay a commission. I suppose he could tell the seller that he wouldn't charge a commission and to lower the price?

All three places were awful.