41 replies to this topic

[Khellus]

Note this was stolen and slightly edited from Stardestroyer.net

Read before you go further:

Spoilers for the first season only. Nothing from the books at all

That's it for spoilers.

Scenario: A genie drops you in Westeros in the Kingdom of your choice: The North, ruled by House Stark, The Vale, ruled by House Arryn, The West, ruled by House Lannister, or in Pentos, where Danaerys Targaryen is to be wed.

You arrive in Westeros in the kingdom of your choice three weeks before Robert I Baratheon departs King's Landing to offer Lord Eddard Stark the position of Hand of the King, or in Pentos a few days prior to Danaerys' wedding to Khal Drogo.

Your Goal: Survive in Westeros for the next five, turbulent years. If you do the Genie will transport you back to your present time without having aged a day, and give you twenty million dollars, if you die, you are transported home without having aged, ten minutes after you were transported, but with no extra money.

Rules:

You cannot directly kill any member of the nobility. If you try the Genie will send you back home. "Direct" in this circumstance is defined as any action resulting in death which requires physical contact with the noble, either with one of your own appendages or with an object being held by said appendage.

Assume full literacy and fluency in Westerosi and Dothraki.

Aside from that, you're free to do what you want.

Assets: You can take back a cart the size of an enclosed pickup truck bed, and will be granting you a horse to pull it as well as animal husbandry skills. Q has given you $10,000 and one week to produce a list of things that he will purchase for you for you to bring with you to Westeros. "Loan" items are allowed, so that means library books etc.


How will you survive, who will you try to ally with, and what would you bring back with you?

Edited by Khellus, Jul 22, 2011 @ 10:13 AM.

[dives]

I had a great (imo) plan, but it involves Dorne, so can I still use it?

Edited by dives, Jul 22, 2011 @ 10:51 AM.

[Khellus]

"Sort of. You'll need to make your way to Dorne from one of the above three Kingdoms. The rules don't say you need to stay in the Vale for example.

One of the more popular plans on this list was to take as many books as you can about arquebus building, obtain a hunting rifle and ammunition, then walk up to Tywin Lannister and say: look what I can give you. It's a very good plan, simple, effective, but the major problem is that helping Tywin means helping Joffrey.

Edited by Khellus, Jul 22, 2011 @ 11:38 AM.

[Danny Franks]

I'd start in the West, and head south, to Dorne. See if I could charm my way into some Dornish noblewoman's good graces.

As to what I'd do to try to survive, I don't know. Have to have a think about it.

Edited by Danny Franks, Jul 22, 2011 @ 12:07 PM.

[dives]

First, buy a couple of books on sea navigation and starting a farm. Then buy items that could be used for trade--cloth, well-made glass items like bowls and glasses, a telescope, and a sextant. It is very important that the items be (or look) handmade, AND are as high quality as possible. $5,000 is spent on extremely high quality coffee beans, and two or three coffee plants. I convince one of my good male friends, who is 6'2" and a rower, to come with me. We get dropped off in Pentos.

Spend maybe a month or two trading up and converting the goods into money. Charter a ship to Dorne, giving the sextant to the captain as a gift. The telescope is a backup gift. My male friend is coming along as an implied bodyguard-- with his build he could probably pass for one and he looks like he could be from the North, but we'll just say he's from Pentos and doesn't know who his parents are. The only kingdom in Westeros I look like I could be from is Dorne, and it strikes me that being a rich young woman alone in the world of ASOIAF is probably a bad idea.

Rent two rooms in Sunspear while we find a suitable small farm with a plot of land in Dorne's highlands. Our story: I was born to Dornish merchant parents in Pentos, who recently died. They bought stuff from all over the world, so I don't know where any of the stuff I'm selling is from and can't help anyone get any more. I decided to return to my homeland to start a new life with my bodyguard, and want to know everything about the place my parents were from.

Hire a small farming family to help me tend the coffee plants and teach me about Dorne, sharing equally in the profit. I'm not much of a gardener, so I would keep looking until I found someone with a very green thumb, along with someone who's honest, etc. Commute into Sunspear every month or so to sell the coffee. Sell it to whoever will take it; offer a bag to the Martells as a gift to try and gain their favor. Do not, however, get involved. The key is to get close enough to the Martells that if necessary I could call on them for protection, but not so important that I become a bartering tool. The farther away from the politics, the better.

Edited by dives, Jul 22, 2011 @ 3:37 PM.

[Khellus]

Good plan in theory dives, but there's one potential problem and one certain problem, and one potentially deadly problem.

Potential problem: We haven't been told the extent of property rights in Westeros but if it's anything like those in Feudal ages they're probably quite low. It'll likely be extremely difficult to simply purchase land. Plus according the Westeros maps, Dorne is mostly desert. The best land is probably already owned by someone.

Certain problem: If your coffee plan works you're going to get a whole lot of addicts who will purchase your coffee at premium prices. That's going to make you wealthy. Certainly wealthier than a lot of people in your surroundings. Dorne isn't Casterly Rock, it isn't Lannisport or Oldtown, which means that as you get richer you're going to find that you're a giant target in the middle of a large group of very hungry poor people. If you don't 'get involved' in the Game of Thrones and obtain a keep and some lands you'll likely find yourself robbed or worse before the year ends.

Potentially Deadly Problem: We don't know that Dorne will stay out of the war, or how long they'll do it for. If they do, and you are rich, you might find that your lands, any liquid capital you have and your property are taken from you to pay for the war chest. At which point you'll just be another poor commoner.

[Sweeney555]

Does "animal husbandry skills" mean riding as well? I'd start out with Dany in Pentos, and being able to ride right off would be a big help. If not, you said I'd have a few days before the wedding, so that means a few riding lessons to be off to at least a rough and ready start.

Since I'm fluent in Dothraki, but look physically like I'd come from Westeros (speaking the Westerosi would be a big help in my masquerade,) I'd finagle my way into being appointed one of Dany's handmaids. Start to pump up her confidence and sense of self-worth earlier (though I'll leave the sex lessons to Doreah, since I've never been a prostitute, LOL.) I'd have to be careful though, not to go too far too early, because Viserys still needs to get his golden crown. Keep my eyes on Ser Jorah, carefully and discreetly, lest I wake up with my throat cut one day. At the crucial moment, before MMD can even open up her mouth, offer my healing skills for Khal Drogo's wound. Modern medical techniques would heal that sucker up with no problem. Help the midwives when Dany was finally brought to "the bloody bed" to make sure Rhaego was born safely. And then just keep on going with the khalasar until they cross the narrow sea into Westeros. And then, I suppose it'll be war.

I already have basic medical skills. I'd want to take a small chest back with me full of medical supplies, including a good supply of the brands of antibiotics that keep their potentcy the longest and resist the heat best. Sunscreen to break in my tan gently. A basic medical textbook and one on midwifery. A good supply of toothpaste, floss, and toothbrushes. Soap, until I get used to whatever the Dothraki use for soap..Since the Dothraki don't believe in money, I'd need some good things to give for "gifts" to get myself outfitted, get a horse, and get my cart and carthorse added to the khalasar's regular apportionment of carts. Also, something to trade for whatever book/books I could find about herbal healing in Pentos--I'd want to add that to my repetoire, and from what I've read, the plantlife is quite different in some respects.

I hope I haven't muffed this up too badly, it's been loads of fun thinking about even if I have. I guess I could think of more things to take back, but I think as a member of a nomadic society, I should travel light.

[Sweeney555]

Does "animal husbandry skills" mean riding as well? I'd start out with Dany in Pentos, and being able to ride right off would be a big help. If not, you said I'd have a few days before the wedding, so that means a few riding lessons to be off to at least a rough and ready start.

Since I'm fluent in Dothraki, but look physically like I'd come from Westeros (speaking the Westerosi would be a big help in my masquerade,) I'd finagle my way into being appointed one of Dany's handmaids. Start to pump up her confidence and sense of self-worth earlier (though I'll leave the sex lessons to Doreah, since I've never been a prostitute, LOL.) I'd have to be careful though, not to go too far too early, because Viserys still needs to get his golden crown. Keep my eyes on Ser Jorah, carefully and discreetly, lest I wake up with my throat cut one day. At the crucial moment, before MMD can even open up her mouth, offer my healing skills for Khal Drogo's wound. Modern medical techniques would heal that sucker up with no problem. Help the midwives when Dany was finally brought to "the bloody bed" to make sure Rhaego was born safely. And then just keep on going with the khalasar until they cross the narrow sea into Westeros. And then, I suppose it'll be war.

I already have basic medical skills. I'd want to take a small chest back with me full of medical supplies, including a good supply of the brands of antibiotics that keep their potentcy the longest and resist the heat best. Sunscreen to break in my tan gently. A basic medical textbook and one on midwifery. A good supply of toothpaste, floss, and toothbrushes. Soap, until I get used to whatever the Dothraki use for soap..Since the Dothraki don't believe in money, I'd need some good things to give for "gifts" to get myself outfitted, get a horse, and get my cart and carthorse added to the khalasar's regular apportionment of carts. Also, something to trade for whatever book/books I could find about herbal healing in Pentos--I'd want to add that to my repetoire, and from what I've read, the plantlife is quite different in some respects.

I hope I haven't muffed this up too badly, it's been loads of fun thinking about even if I have. I guess I could think of more things to take back, but I think as a member of a nomadic society, I should travel light.

[ElymianDucat]

Wonderful thread, but I think it belongs in the Goofing Off in Westeros sub-forum.

As for the challenge itself I would ask the genie to deposit me near the city of Lannisport, in the Westerlands. As for the contents of my cart, it would be as follows:

• A bag of silver coins. Silver US dimes would be the closest in size to medieval coins, so for US$ 2,980 I’d get 1,000 silver coins, which should cover my immediate needs and travel expenses.
• 600 pounds of black peppercorns (US$ 6,300)
• The last US$ 720 I’d use to purchase antibiotics and other medicine (generics of course)

I’d take my cart to the nearest tax office and explain that I’m a trader from a far off land. I would claim that after a disagreement with the captain of the ship that was carrying me, the guy marooned me and my part of the cargo in Westeros. After that, I’d say, I bought the cart and made my way to the nearest city. The purpose of the sob story is to explain why I have the spices but haven’t paid the taxes or gone thru the port. The last thing I’d want is to be caught smuggling in Tywin Lannister’s lands.

Then I would ask assistance to sell my spices for the best price possible so I could pay said taxes. Given that Lannisport is the port farthest from any trade route and full of gold, I’d expect I would get a very decent price. I’ve read that pepper was worth its weight in gold, but since I can’t be sure I’ll be conservative and assume that I can get 1/12 of its weight in gold as payment. That’s 50 lbs. of gold, which assuming the gold dragon has the same gold content as the medieval florin (3.5 g) means aprox. 6,494 dragons. Let’s round it up to 6,500 dragons. The tax will probably be 10%, so that leaves me with 5,850 dragons.

Now 5,850 gold dragons is a huge amount of money in a medieval setting, too much for one guy to safely carry around. So I would locate the local representative of the Iron Bank of Braavos and deposit 5,800 dragons with him in return for a bill of exchange to be cashed in Braavos. After that I’d attach myself to a group traveling to King’s Landing for the Hand’s Tounament. Maybe hire a sellsword or two as bodyguards. Once there I’ll take a ship to Braavos and redeem my bill of exchange and buy a house. 100 gold dragons ought to buy a fairly decent house and leave the rest for me to live comfortably on for the next five years, while I live a life of leisure learning to speak Braavosi and High Valyrian. I’d then start accumulating scrolls of histories and dragon lore to bring back with me.

In case you were wondering why I didn’t ask to be dropped in Pentos to begin with, I don’t trust that place. If I showed up out of nowhere with a cartful of pepper I’d end up enslaved in no time I think. Tywin might be a raging jackass, but at least he’ll be law abiding and his city is likely to be safe and orderly.

In case we have to spend the five years in Westeros itself, I’d do everything the same, except heading to Oldtown instead of Braavos.

Edited by ElymianDucat, Jul 22, 2011 @ 6:35 PM.

[TWoP Dietrich]

I'm moving this thread to the "Goofing Off in Westeros" subforum. Don't take this to mean that the only thing you're allowed to do in Westeros is goof off.

[Meshakhad]

Due to the inherent dangers, I'm not even going to try to invent gunpowder. Instead, I'll go the medicine route.

I will bring back with me medical texts, recipes for whatever medicines can be manufactured using medieval technology, basic lab equipment, enough penicillin mold to get me started, and a seed fund of gold - enough to buy a house.

My starting point, and intended residence, will be the Vale of Arryn. I'll set up shop as a healer. My thinking is that the Arryns remained neutral during the war, so I won't be at risk of my city being sacked. I have no intention of playing the Game of Thrones. I'll just mind my own business for five years.

[Khellus]

I will bring back with me medical texts, recipes for whatever medicines can be manufactured using medieval technology, basic lab equipment, enough penicillin mold to get me started, and a seed fund of gold - enough to buy a house.

My starting point, and intended residence, will be the Vale of Arryn. I'll set up shop as a healer. My thinking is that the Arryns remained neutral during the war, so I won't be at risk of my city being sacked. I have no intention of playing the Game of Thrones. I'll just mind my own business for five years.

If you become a healer, you'll eventually draw attention to yourself. With modern medical techniques, you'll find yourself brought to the court of some noble as soon as you first cure someone of the flu.

[fallingfortruth]

Well, not so much flu, since that's a virus, but when the bloody flux tears through the Seven Kingdoms and the Vale goes untouched, people will be a little suspicious.

Honestly my plan involves enough birth control pills and long-lived antibiotics to see me through the time allotted, a variety of decent clothes made by re-enactors so no one will find them odd, multivitamins, a small amount of silver and gold melted down into ingots, and a one-way ticket to Pentos. From there I'd trade some of the gold for a ticket to Braavos and set myself up as a relatively high-end, but not totally top dollar, courtesan. Keep my head down, don't piss anyone off, keep myself disease- and kid-free for my time, and come back with some kickass stories.

[fallingfortruth]

argh, double post. Sorry.

Edited by fallingfortruth, Jul 25, 2011 @ 4:01 PM.

[ElymianDucat]

a small amount of silver and gold melted down into ingots

At today’s prices, US$ 10,000 will get you only about 6.25 troy ounces of gold. In such small amounts you’ll be better off taking coins rather than a single very small ingot. I recomend gold sovereigns.

Edited by ElymianDucat, Jul 26, 2011 @ 11:28 PM.

[Khellus]

You know what'd be a good idea? Use modern production chain methods to drastically amp up the total tonnage of glass produced in a year, then sell said glass to the North. The North will snap up cheap sheets of glass at extortionate prices so long as it's below the average so that it can use it for greenhouses. Plus, it has the added bonus of increasing the total amount of food in the North which will be given to the Wall, thus increasing the ability of the Wall to defend you against the White Walkers.

Edited by Khellus, Jul 27, 2011 @ 4:21 PM.

[screamin]

From there I'd trade some of the gold for a ticket to Braavos and set myself up as a relatively high-end, but not totally top dollar, courtesan.

Seems to me a rather dangerous profession. I'm pretty sure syphilis and other venereal diseases do exist on Westeros (Tyrion, I think, calls someone 'son of a poxy whore') and I think it'll be kind of hard to persuade clients to wear condoms, even if you could pass them off as having been manufactured in Westeros.

[fallingfortruth]

Which is why I'm bringing along antibiotics and birth control pills. The majority of sexually transmitted diseases can be knocked out by plain old penicillin if no one else is taking it. Yes, there are STIs that are viral/parasitic, but most of them can be contracted elsewhere. Also I'm under no illusions about the incidence of Rape in this universe, and the upside of being a courtesan is that you have large, very well paid guards protecting your virtue when you're not selling it.

I didn't say that it was a perfect plan, but it's the one I'd be going with.

[ElymianDucat]

You know what'd be a good idea? Use modern production chain methods to drastically amp up the total tonnage of glass produced in a year,

The glass makers of Myr might send a Faceless Man to take you out.

Edited by ElymianDucat, Jul 28, 2011 @ 2:47 PM.

[Khellus]

The glass makers of Myr might send a Faceless Man to take you out.

There are glass makers in Myr?

[zombygirl]

I would just take some basic warm cloths and supplies and set up shop as a baker in the Vale. So long as I avoid pissing off Robin Aryn I'll be set.

[Khellus]

Don't forger: you know the Others are coming. Regardless of where you stay, if that Wall comes down or gets overrun, you're screwed.

[Darmys]

I think fallingfortruth has the right idea in getting to Braavos and setting up shop. Only instead of going the courtesan myself route I'd set myself up as a madam and run the cathouse. pick a location between the two major harbours where I'm close to both but not really part of either, and work on my reputation for food. Some nice big brawny bouncer types as I can afford them.

[fallingfortruth]

Once you have a stable setup, I'd totally work for you, Darmys. I just recognize that at 24, not a lot of options exist for me that don't involve being a 24 year old chick first and foremost. ;)

[Darmys]

I'd be happy for you to free-lance out of my establishment fallingfortruth I'm sure that we can work out some mutually beneficial terms. Or you can be part of my stable if you'd like.

[fallingfortruth]

I'll share my penicillin with your other girls if you'll cut me in on a percentage of the profits.

[Khellus]

What happens when you run out of penicillin?

[Darmys]

moldy bread poultices will be a first step, also part of treating the girls well means that I'll be going for a 'clean' plan. Gentlemen callers will need to submit to a small examination before they get to continue. If they pass they play, if they don't they can either be escorted from the premises for free, or they can pay a small fee and sit upstairs for half an hour before returning to their friends.

[Complex77]

To play it safe, I would take some practical, well selling stuff with me that is not too conspicious and could pass easily for some goods from Westeros or maybe somewhere in Essos without raising too many eyebrows. Like some rolls of fabric (wool, preferably), cheap mass-produced stoneware made in China, pans, pots, tin cups, things like that. I would make the genie put me to Lannisport, Kings Landing or Casterly Rock, sell my stuff and head to Oldtown. There I would just join the Maesters of the Citadel. With my ability to read and write and my scientific background, they should take me. I would even have a little sum of money to bribe my way in if needs be. And thats it. By the time I forged this chain, the five years might well be over. So no real danger of being sent to some court where I would get too close to the game of thrones.

Plan B for Oldtown if for some reason the Citadel is no option: Live a little time from the money I have and try to get a job as a secretary for one of the traders there. Bookkeeping, that is.

Boring, but quite secure, my options.

Edited by Complex77, Aug 2, 2011 @ 5:04 AM.

[screamin]

Which is why I'm bringing along antibiotics and birth control pills. The majority of sexually transmitted diseases can be knocked out by plain old penicillin if no one else is taking it. Yes, there are STIs that are viral/parasitic, but most of them can be contracted elsewhere.

That's assuming that the spectrum of diseases in Westeros duplicates that on earth, and are vulnerable to the same medicines...but we know that the Mendelian laws don't seem to apply in that universe and there are some weird diseases (greyscale, anyone?) so I'm not sure you can count on every variety of "pox" tamely yielding to penicillin (not to mention syphilis' early stages are sometimes not noticeable).

Myself, I'd fill a wagon with a variety of goods - glass and china, small amounts of spices and salts, a copper still, a trunk of fabric dyes, hair dyes, cosmetics, nail polish and (cheap) perfume, and some seeds and sacks of potatoes - which apparently do not exist in that universe. Also a small basic medical and surgical kit with appropriate books, a couple of pit bulls, and a handgun on me. Also a few small gems sewn into my hem. I'd have myself sent to the Vale, pass myself off as an eccentric peddlar of small success, looking to settle down and retire in some small town near the Eyrie. Once I'd rented a nice, clean hovel with a bit of garden land, sold a few things (not too rich, not too poor), and plant my garden, I'd make like Johnny Potatoseed and pay several peasants around a few silvers to plant an acre of potatoes each and give me a sack of them when grown. Since the yield from an acre is much higher than a sack, I'm hoping the peasants will adopt it as one of their crops, since it will feed them better, and plump peasants are less likely to eat me When Winter Comes. I will also pray there's no potato blight. I'll take to distilling cheap liquor for fun, profit, wound disinfectant, and Molotov cocktails in case of zombies.

Once I've established myself as a harmless, useful nutcase, I shall visit the local aristocracy and humbly offer my beautician services, with an ultimate view to working my way up to being an occasional visitor to the Eyrie (I'll bet Lysa would love to retouch her hair). The aristocrats are the ones most likely to have food and protection available in crisis. And yes, I know it's dangerous to get too close to The Game, but what's really the point of going if not to get a glimpse of the action (and maybe to sneakily influence it here and there?)