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Say Yes to the Dress: Bridesmaids (from Hell)


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#271

Luv2Soap

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Posted May 7, 2012 @ 3:14 PM

Because of Kate, I can't believe that more bridal designers have not added sleeves to their dresses and more brides havent requested them.

I guess they think that sexy and wedding is synonymous. Count me as one who doesn't.
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#272

davout1806

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Posted May 7, 2012 @ 4:59 PM

Unfortunately, not everyone looks like Kate Middleton in a wedding dress--whether it has sleeves or not. I think the bride should realize that not everyone is going to look beautiful in every dress. The same goes for bridesmaids. Too many brides pick dresses which do not flatter or compliment the often wide variety of figure shapes and sizes that her bridesmaids possess. I know it should be her choice, but putting a bit more careful thought into what looks best on the most women in her party is much smarter (IMHO). I would think you could also make it much easier to choose if you limited your attendants to four or less, as well.
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#273

mooncreek

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Posted May 7, 2012 @ 11:03 PM

I wish I hadn't deleted this episode because I just thought of something. In her talking head Lori said something about brides choosing ugly bridesmaids dresses. I forgot her exact words. The thing is, why would Lori have any dress in her shop that she wouldn't want a bride to choose? I'm not talking about color combinations, but the style itself. Is there anyone who can go back and see if I misunderstood what she said? Thanks

I seem to remember her saying something to that effect regarding the lady who initially wanted denim bridesmaid dresses, so it wasn't an item in the shop.
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#274

Biosynth

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Posted May 9, 2012 @ 12:13 PM

I just can't believe some of the outlandish colors that are offered. Some are ok, like the royal blues, but why do they have to trot out the eye searing fuschias and oranges. Ug! It's feast or famin here. Either it's depressing grey or painful neon colors.

Being a child of the 80s, I'm not opposed to neon, I'm just opposed to it with chiffon flowers and on a bridesmaid.
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#275

SunShine Gal

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Posted May 9, 2012 @ 1:07 PM

I didn't know bridesmaid dresses came in those colors either. They had a green so bright I think it came with a battery pack in the hem.

Also, the prices of these dresses is over the top. I was a bridesmaid in the 80's and my dress cost $100, which was a lot for me to come up with at 19 years old. Some of the dresses on this show are $500! How can these young women be expected to pay that much? I would have had to politely decline being a bridesmaid. I understand that the bride wants what she wants but she should also be reasonable. I wonder if the show producers pay a percentage of the dresses or there's some sort of compensation for being on the show.
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#276

MaryDell

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Posted May 9, 2012 @ 2:15 PM

Also, the prices of these dresses is over the top. I was a bridesmaid in the 80's and my dress cost $100, which was a lot for me to come up with at 19 years old. Some of the dresses on this show are $500! How can these young women be expected to pay that much?


Once upon a time, the bride was responsible for purchasing her bridesmaids' dresses. Sadly, that seems to have disappeared over the decades along with a lot of bridal "traditions." If each bridesmaid's dress is $300 and you have five bridesmaids you are talking about an additional $1500. For many, many of the weddings that are planned on these bridal shows, that's less than 10% of the total cost of the wedding. It's not that expensive; in fact, $1500 is probably about the same price as the flowers. It's perfectly "do-able," but somehow it seems that it's more fashionable and more accepted to spend that $1500 somewhere else and to make your friends pony up money for the "honor" of standing around in a dress they will never wear again.
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#277

gemini70

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Posted May 9, 2012 @ 3:24 PM

You've got to wonder about this show, and all those bridesmaid dresses.... Maybe shops are required to carry the designers whole line instead of pick and choose. Same thing with the colors, but that might be explained better with 'here' is dress style # 495393295302043295932 and it comes in the following colors- everbellamellaley, sealovamorgananera, veragonateoranea, grenaronadieands, purchianchianiada, and puce. The swatches are 1"x1", mailed from china during a drought, through an india monsoon then 3 years later, made it to the 'bridal shop'. Under the 250WATT BULBS that show all 100k enlarged pores in your face, you believe that vera..., which appears to be a lovely pale gold and pur... , a lite shade of lavender are your BRIDAL COLORS! Your 15 bridesmaids order accordingly, each take their swatch so their shoes match! Come 2 weeks before the wedding, your attendents get their GOLD LAME OR FUSHIA dresses that definitely do not match those shoes dyed to order pale gold and lite lavender. Matter of fact, the dresses outshine you, the flowers, the tables, even the disco ball on the ceiling. The saleswome.. err girl says something along the line 'I thing they were dropped in bleach maybe...' and giggles..

Well, in the end, you looked beautiful and your attendants looked like they were attending an '80s prom!!!! Now, I have heard of women, uhm, GIRLS picking BEYOND UGLY dresses for their attendents so they shine, but I have never seen that. Why would you? You are going to lose whatever friends you have and besides, some date of your ex will do a better job of it.

So other than required to carry the full line, I would think that different folks, different dresses.. Or, if we carry everything under the sun, they have to like SOMETHING.

I just feel it is ridiculous that the wedding industry has become such a ripoff and young brides are falling for it. Especially when they decide on 15 bridesmaids and they ALL HAVE TO MATCH. Please, 15 women/girls are not all going to have the same body type.

Now, if they would just get rid of that satin, taffeta crap for any girl over 4 please?
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#278

queasy

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Posted May 9, 2012 @ 7:43 PM

I still like looking at the dresses, but am tired of a few -- especially that awful one with the chiffon "flowers" on the shoulder and across the bodice.

Those are horrible! And there seem to be several variations of them -- like, women love a lumpy clump of fabric hanging off their dresses, so let's make it super available in all silhouettes and styles!!
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#279

millk

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Posted May 11, 2012 @ 9:07 PM

I loved the preppy yacht dress that bride with the mother chose. Not something I would wear (too Zooey D) but it was adorable.

We saw that one dress twice with the cabbage leaves over the boobs. Goodness! Who would ever wear that!

That super negative bride was so acting with the rude remarks.

I like Topher - way better than Brandon.
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#280

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Posted May 11, 2012 @ 9:50 PM

In the bride without the mother part, who was the red-haired woman who was sitting by the bride? I missed that.
I liked most DeVonne picks, although I did like the first long dress better than the one she chose.
The scientists segment was fun, and they looked good on the day.
Whenever I see a beach wedding, I feel sorry for the florist. My niece was married on the beach, and the florist was fighting the winds until the last moment.
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#281

queasy

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Posted May 11, 2012 @ 10:47 PM

Did I miss a memo somewhere that said knee length has become tea length? And what was with all the woman who felt knee length was whorish? Bizarre.

I would have liked to have seen the wedding with the cute preppy dresses in navy. They probably did set the tone (well, unless the mother got her way and messed something up).
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#282

mooncreek

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Posted May 11, 2012 @ 10:48 PM

The Super Negative Bride - I really felt for the bridesmaid who'd just gotten married. While the bride pulled out all those drama cards, poor thing looked like a deer in headlights.

I was stunned the mother actually liked the cabbage dress - and that she's the one who said there's no such thing as too much boob.

OMG, the scientists were Awesome (though I could not get Amy Farrah Fowler out of my head)!

Topher >>> Brandon

Edited by mooncreek, May 11, 2012 @ 11:00 PM.

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#283

lu1wml

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Posted May 11, 2012 @ 11:27 PM

Did I miss a memo somewhere that said knee length has become tea length?

Yes you did, and it didn't land on my desk either.
If you do a google search on "tea length," you'll find some revisionism going on, but if you do a google image search, most of the hits are indeed tea length, but I find a some knee and top of the knee dresses so labelled.
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#284

davout1806

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Posted May 12, 2012 @ 9:48 AM

I hope someone can answer this question about TV protcol for me. I watched the show with the very rude bride. After Lori "supposedly" got to the heart of the woman's problem, i.e. her mother, they showed a picture of the bride and her mother. You got the idea that there was a great deal to this story, but they didn't say much. What I was wondering was: when they show still pictures of people who are living and not there, do they have to get permission to show them on TV? What I wondered was: if they had to get permission to show the picture from the mother herself then that seems strange because if she gave her permission but wouldn't come with the daughter then that sends this whole episode down a new path of thought. I know it would be nice (sometimes) to have your mother there for EVERYTHING as she put it, but if you have a royal pain in the posterior like that other southern mama who wanted her daughter to get the red dress with the tulip skirt, then I think I would count myself lucky if she wasn't there.

This whole story seemed very put on for TV. Heavens if brides and bridesmaids have to go to Lori for counseling and to repair alienation then we really are going to see this side of the show hyped up even more than it is now.
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#285

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Posted May 12, 2012 @ 9:54 AM

So much of this show is so obvious that it is created drama for the show. You can tell by most of their faces that they are just doing as told. When I got married I first suggested the different dresses in the same color and fabric choice to my bridesmaids since they were all different sizes, they all told me no. Then I found one at JC Penney for $75 and they told me no again (my usherettes wound up getting those and both of them have been used twice since then for another wedding and prom). Then they were looking at a Bill Levkoff one for over $300 which I admandtly said no too since it was just way to much and I knew a few of my girls couldn't afford but they wouldn't stand up to my MOH. We finally found a dress that looked good on everyone, was only $150, and everyone said they loved. I told the girls they could wear any shoes they wanted ( my two MOH's wore red like me and the others black, the one MOH ha shoes that cost more than her dress but that was her choice). They all had different hairstyles so they could go where they wanted or do their own and we had free makeup services, but only if they wanted it, and I gave the jewelry as a gift. There are definite ways to get what you like as a bride while still keeping it as cheap as possible and without being a Bridezilla or a Pushover like most of the brides on this show.

Edited by Carpedi7, May 12, 2012 @ 9:56 AM.

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#286

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Posted May 12, 2012 @ 11:06 AM

I've been around for quite a while and never heard the bride paid for bridesmaids' dresses. The bride paid for gifts for her bridesmaids but the dresses were always the responsibility of the bridesmaids. There might be some small pockets where this wasn't true but in general bridal etiquette never required the bride to pick up the tab.

FWIW, $100 in the 1980's is equivalent to about $230 in today's dollars and I think that is pretty much what most of the dresses cost. There was only one bride where the price of the dress was $500 or so and that was the "storyline" of the episode.

I don't have much sympathy with bridesmaids because they are WILLING participants and any bridesmaid knows that agreeing means that she is going to be forking over money for a dress with very few exceptions.

I think a bridal store would want to stock the styles and then as many of the colors as possible so that a bride could see a full dress in the color as opposed to just a swatch even if not in the style chosen.

To the extent that retail involves picking and choosing stock, a salon is probably going to choose more dresses in styles that are popular as well as leaning towards colors that are trending.
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#287

maggiethebeagle

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Posted May 12, 2012 @ 11:07 AM

New SYTTD Bridesmaids drinking game - every time they bring out the dress with the big flowers on the shoulder...drink! I feel like that damn dress is trotted out in almost every single show. I don't like it - frankly, I think it looks like a maternity dress and I am just scratching my head over why anyone would want those huge ugly fake flowers sitting up on their shoulder!

I absolutely loved yacht bride's choice! Loved the style and the material. Very pretty.
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#288

osowolf

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Posted May 12, 2012 @ 11:40 AM

FWIW, $100 in the 1980's is equivalent to about $230 in today's dollars and I think that is pretty much what most of the dresses cost.


Ouch! Because back in the 80's as a college student, I agreed to be a bridesmaid and got stuck with a $300 dress to buy. It was so ugly. Unlike the girls on this show, even though the bride had promised me and the other poor girl we wouldn't go over $150, I sucked it up when we were overruled by the other 8 bridesmaids. It never occurred to me to complain because somehow the idea that "it's the bride's day" just stuck with me. Crazy huh?!?

On the other side of the spectrum, I was blessed to be invited by my BFF to be a bridesmaid. Her only criteria was that we stick to the same color and length. There were three of us--tall and skinny, medium height and curvy and then me, short and plumpish. But each one of us looked beautiful on that day, in a dress that was appropriate for our shapes, because she loved us and was confident enough to want us to look our best on her day.

I don't see that much on this show. I would like to believe that most of it is scripted and some of the girls are only behaving that way for the tv cameras. If not? That's some sad examples of friendship that were shown........
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#289

MaryDell

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Posted May 12, 2012 @ 2:20 PM

...the dresses were always the responsibility of the bridesmaids.


Sometime around the 1940's (rough estimate) this tradition began to change, but there was definitely a time when the bride paid for the bridesmaids' dresses. There are still young ladies out there now who are gracious enough to take some of the money they would have spent on themselves and pay for their bridesmaids' dresses instead. They are rare, but they are still out there.

It is true, though, that in this day and age a girl who is asked to be a bridesmaid would expect to pay for her own dress.
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#290

yslchyc

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Posted May 12, 2012 @ 4:04 PM

Sometime around the 1940's (rough estimate) this tradition began to change, but there was definitely a time when the bride paid for the bridesmaids' dresses. There are still young ladies out there now who are gracious enough to take some of the money they would have spent on themselves and pay for their bridesmaids' dresses instead. They are rare, but they are still out there.

It is true, though, that in this day and age a girl who is asked to be a bridesmaid would expect to pay for her own dress.


Going that far back in social history really has nothing to do with weddings with bridesmaids as they are commonly celebrated now. People who had large weddings were wealthy so perhaps they did pick up the tab for everything but large formal weddings were not the norm for most people.

People were poorer and many of the dresses would have been handmade if they weren't from the upper classes. None of my aunts nor my mother had bridesmaids (married in the 1930's/1940's) and only one actually had a white traditional bridal gown although for all I know she could have just rented it for the formal photograph LOL. There just wasn't any kind of bridal industry for the middle classes that had these kinds of expectations.

People had fewer garments so it would have been unthinkable to expect someone to purchase a dress intended to be worn for a specific occasion unless the people were wealthy. Closets in older homes reflect the smaller wardrobes of most women pre about 1960 when clothing became very cheap in terms of purchasing power.
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#291

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Posted May 12, 2012 @ 7:06 PM

I feel like that damn dress is trotted out in almost every single show.


And it gets uglier every time. Apparently it's not from just one designer so it's another trend being force fed to us just like the mandate that anything except strapless is no acceptable under any circumstances. And now it's "tea length" which is just a fancier way of saying short.

There's a sucker born every minute....
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#292

yslchyc

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Posted May 12, 2012 @ 8:37 PM

And now it's "tea length" which is just a fancier way of saying short.


FWIW tea length isn't "short" but is a length that falls somewhere above the calves - If you are old enough, it used to be called "midi length" on business suits but tea length is the description for the length in a "fancy" dress which generally also has a bouffant skirt.

I think it is a really attractive option because it's somewhat more formal than short cocktail length dresses but not as formal as full length ball gowns. I think it's also more flattering than short on many women because short cocktail dresses often aren't as becoming to different figures whereas most women look well in this length.

Also - at least to me - it enables women to wear more comfortable shoes since short skirts tend to look best when worn with high heels whereas tea length skirts can be worn with low heels and even look cute with ballerina flats.
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#293

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Posted May 12, 2012 @ 11:50 PM

Sometime around the 1940's (rough estimate) this tradition began to change, but there was definitely a time when the bride paid for the bridesmaids' dresses. There are still young ladies out there now who are gracious enough to take some of the money they would have spent on themselves and pay for their bridesmaids' dresses instead. They are rare, but they are still out there.


Brides paying for everything is still expected in some cultures. Being first generation Canadian, I had to find a polite way to explain to my Hong Kong raised cousins that bridesmaids were expected to pay for their own dresses (I had bridesmaids from both Canada and Hong Kong at my wedding). I did pay for the girls' make-up, manicures and pedicures though.
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#294

mdddi

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Posted May 13, 2012 @ 9:22 AM

Could someone please tell me how to quote? Usually there is a quote button in forums but I don't see one here. I checked FAQs and didn't see it. Thanks in advance.
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#295

kohola3

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Posted May 13, 2012 @ 9:52 AM

Could someone please tell me how to quote? Usually there is a quote button in forums but I don't see one here. I checked FAQs and didn't see it. Thanks in advance.


In the Add Reply window, it's the last button on the left above the text area. If you rest your mouse cursor over it it says "Insert quotation".

FWIW tea length isn't "short" but is a length that falls somewhere above the calves - If you are old enough, it used to be called "midi length" on business suits but tea length is the description for the length in a "fancy" dress which generally also has a bouffant skirt.


Except that Brandon calls everything that isn't floor length "tea length". Seems to be interchangeable with just short these days, at least at Lori's. One more reason to avoid the place!
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#296

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Posted May 13, 2012 @ 10:50 AM

Or at least to avoid Brandon. :-)

I think those talking head moments when the sales associate describes the dress to the bride are stupid-hilarious.

"Jennifer is wearing a green chiffon dress with a short skirt. Maryann is wearing a green dress with a sweetheart neckline and a short skirt. Alison is wearing a long green dress with a bow detail at the waist."

Are the brides all color blind? Unable to distinguish between long and short? Unfamiliar with the concept of "the bow detail"? Does anyone want to bet that every single one of them can recognize chiffon at ten paces?

Edited by Ketzel, May 13, 2012 @ 10:52 AM.

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#297

kohola3

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Posted May 13, 2012 @ 3:07 PM

Are the brides all color blind? Unable to distinguish between long and short? Unfamiliar with the concept of "the bow detail"? Does anyone want to bet that every single one of them can recognize chiffon at ten paces?

They probably consider us idiots as well. The insipid comments at the morning meeting are dumbed down to the level of a second grader. But then Lori is the High Priestess of Bridal - and offers psychological profiles, too, so they must think we need her interpretation of every situation.
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#298

dreamcoat11

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Posted May 18, 2012 @ 11:45 PM

I don't think the one-shoulder-with-the-fake-flowers is quite as hideous as the beige halter dress with pleats all at the neckline/bust. That dress does not look good on anyone except for the skinniest, most flat-chested girl you can find.
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#299

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Posted May 19, 2012 @ 12:54 AM

Man, I'm agreeing with Lori (yikes). I like it when the bridesmaids match. I'm a matchy-matchy person. When that vintage barnyard bride wanted her maids to pick whatever they wanted, I shuddered. Glad Lori was able to convince them to pick the same designer or fabric. It will look more cohesive that way.

And the black charmeuse gowns looked good even though they were different styles.
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#300

sweet201

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Posted May 19, 2012 @ 1:38 AM

I don't think the one-shoulder-with-the-fake-flowers is quite as hideous as the beige halter dress with pleats all at the neckline/bust. That dress does not look good on anyone except for the skinniest, most flat-chested girl you can find.


Yes! That thing is god awful. It smashes the chest and pooches out the tummy of every maid who tries it on - not to mention the giant gaping armholes. It needs bust darts or something.
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