51 replies to this topic

[cissyboo]

From Food Network:

It's delicious down home comfort food that's fit to feed your soul. Sandra Lee makes her over-the-top Sweet Potato and Bacon Hushpuppies and a fresh flavored Corn and Black Eyed Pea Salad. The comfort keeps coming with Deep Fried Chicken with Cheddar Grits. Yum! And, it’s all topped off with a decadent Bourbon Pecan Pie. And, for cocktail time, it’s a Devine Dicey. Finally, Sandra Lee creates a warm and welcoming tablescape to match her comfort food menu.

Today, Sandy is dressed for cooking in a red shirt with a lace trimmed cami underneath, black pants. Food is, as expected shades of yellow and brown, but the scrape is red and orange.

Hushpuppies-corn muffin mix, cornmeal, onions (chopped frozen and thawed), egg, and canned sweet potato mush. Bacon-that already cooked stuff from the store. Imagine all the flavor you can use with the egg cornmeal and muffin mix! Small ice cream scoop (the melon baler has returned!) so they are all the same size. Keep an eye on them, they are very fast-shit one’s running off now! Dipping sauce-Honey mustard salad dressing and lemon juice-to brighten it up. The recipes are simple, yet decadent. Literally two minutes on each side for the pups. Into the dish her honey mustard goes! Drain the pups on a towel-they look more like patties than balls.

Corn and black eyed pea salad-canned peas, frozen thawed stirfry peppers, thawed frozen corn, jarlic, hot sauce-to add a ton of kick-and Cajun seasoning(chili pepper cayenne pepper garlic and stuff), honey mustard dressing-makes everything meld together and come together beautiful-the perfect touch! Make extra-it’s beautiful, bright, a birthday party on a plate! That shit with the hush puppies are soul food love on a plate! She sticks a pup into the sauce and bites into it-foodgasm! Commercial break (so she can spit out the food).
I care not about commercials today.

We’re back! The red top is getting lower and lower-thank dog for the cami. Making chicken-egg and buttermilk, hot sauce (2 TBS)-soul food is layers of kick! Coating is fish fry coating-has cornmeal in it-soul food has to have cornmeal in it to give it kick and crunch. Sandra wants us to believe she eats at Sylvia’s in Harlem. Sandra’s using chicken breast cutlets (like for scallopini) for the fired chicken-bread and dump into a fryer at 375. 8 minutes in the oil-don't crowd or we get greasy cold chicken!

So we move on to the grits. Water, butter, cheese-which goes in after the grits, grits-one cup instant (like polenta!), whisky whisky, add cheese and whisky whisky-metal whisk in non-stick pan-YUM!
Get out the chicken! You cannot go wrong with semi-ho-the recipes are fast, thoughtfrul, delicious, blah blah blah. Plate the chicken with the grits. Break time-next up pie and COCKTAIL plus the scape and dress change!

Pie-it’s genius (unlike Sandy!). Butter, brown sugar, cream together with the eggs. Add caramel sauce (which we all have in our pantry, right?) instead of corn syrup, because it adds flavor (or preservatives and chemicals). Bourbon, and cinnamon (or pumpkin pie spice)! Again with the hour and a half to make a pie shell. Use a frozen one. Add pecans to filling. She doesn’t blind bake the shell, because pecan pie isn’t a wet filling (?!?). Pie smells like soul food heaven! Pie is gooey and sweet. Whipped topping with bourbon in it on top!

Cocktail after the break. Booze! Every soul food menu has to have a cocktail! I always drink beer, or ice tea with soul food, but that’s just me, not mixed drinks.
Southern belle dress (according to Sandy)-red dress. Red and orange plates and no room for food, per usual. Flowers, and towers of candles. And yet again, nothing I like or would eat either on the table or on the menu! This season is fabulous, and a classic in the making.

Edited by cissyboo, Apr 24, 2011 @ 3:47 PM.

[rhys7]

I'm not familiar with the cut frozen vegetables for a salad. It seems to me they would be flaccid and that seems odd for a salad. Thoughts?

When I make polenta, it takes 20 - 30 minutes. WTF was she talking about when she told us grits were quick like polenta?

[grisgris]

I've got to start by addressing the tablescape. That had to be one of the most hideous and overdone ones yet. It was an explosion of ornj and red. The ugliest parts were the odd combination of silk roses and live tulips. It was such a poor mixture of height and volume. Then, those ginormous candle pedestals. What are you supposed to do with a 3" cast iron skillet? Anybody notice that she said that the had strewn "rose pells" down the center of the table. Again, marching votive candles.

I'm getting tired of her telling us that "you all have this in your pantry." I do not have corn muffin mix, caramel sauce, frozen chopped onions or stir-fry mix.

What was the purpose of adding cornmeal to corn muffin mix? I know that today's lesson was that all soul food must contain both cornmeal and hot sauce. I can't imagine how awful those hush puppies were. Gritty cornmeal, soggy raw onion and hard crunchy bacon.

That salad? Barf. Yes, I think the frozen/thawed peppers and onions would be limp and mushy. Usually, the frozen stir-fry mixes I've seen also contain water chestnuts, bamboo shoots and bean sprouts. You can purchase frozen pepper combos with onion. (Not that I have.) Honey mustard dressing with Cajun seasoning... ugh.

Most people who have any interest in food, know of Sylvia's, but some random Fandra who tuned in probably had no idea. As Slop was telling the disjointed story, she neglected to mention that Sylvia owned a soul food restaurant. She also has a limited line of canned products -- like greens.

The chicken cutlets and grits didn't look too bad and Slop actually tasted the grits. I didn't get the comparison to polenta either. I know she was using quick-cook grits. Is there quick-cook polenta?

The pie-making scene was hilarious. Again, we were told that it takes 1 1/2 hours to make a pie crust. Fifteen minutes to mix the dough, one hour to let it "set up" in the refrigerator and another 15 minutes to roll it out and crimp it. Then she said that you only had to blind bake a pie crust if it had a wet filling. While saying that, she poured the gloppy very wet pecan filling into the crust. When the pie came out of the oven, I thought the top looked horribly burned.

How thoughtful of her to make a drink and name it after her grandma. Today, Dicey was from Louisiana. On her other soul food show with Reggie, she said her grandma was from one of the Carolinas. Maybe it was her other grandma.

When Slop said she was going to change into a "Southern belle" dress, I was hoping she'd appear in a Scarlett O'Hara dress -- complete with a hoop skirt.

[Philly Phoodie]

Just too much going on in that bean salad, and none of it good.
The pie filling looked like diarrhea with some turds in it.
I just loved how the show was about "soul food" but near the end she said, "And now um gawna put on my best southern belle dress on"....the irony.

[lillybee]

I think Sandra should have been banned forever from making soul food after that Kwanza cake debacle.

[Philly Phoodie]

Most people who have any interest in food, know of Sylvia's, but some random Fandra who tuned in probably had no idea. As Slop was telling the disjointed story, she neglected to mention that Sylvia owned a soul food restaurant. She also has a limited line of canned products -- like greens.

I've never eaten there myself, but I know of people who have, and absolutely love her food. I've only used her seasoning products; I'm not a fan of canned greens though.

And I would have probably used fried fish instead of chicken breasts to eat with the grits; that would have made more sense. My dad was from the South and I loved his fish & grits breakfasts. Chicken? Maybe chicken & waffles?

Edited by Philly Phoodie, Apr 24, 2011 @ 1:33 PM.

[ubi]

When Slop said she was going to change into a "Southern belle" dress, I was hoping she'd appear in a Scarlett O'Hara dress -- complete with a hoop skirt.

The one made from her curtains, of course.

I didn't pay a lot of attention, but where was Reggie, who's done "soul food" cooking with her at least twice before?

[lillybee]

When she puts that pie into the oven, she says for about 45 minutes but when she takes it out, she said it was an hour. So Sandy. how long really?

If I had all the food and booze in my pantry that she thinks we all have, I wouldn't have room in my kitchen for my pots, dishes etc.

[tahitigirl]

She was channeling Giada this morning with her looks of ecstasy, squeals, and jumping up & down over that pie (gestures previously saved for cocktail time).

I mentioned once that she never tasted the food. Well, she's changed her spots because today she was tasting left & right (probably food someone else had made off screen). I don't know if it's because she took such huge bites, but she is not a pretty taster.

[Kathcart]

I don't know if it's because she took such huge bites, but she is not a pretty taster.

Ick, I know. The one microsecond I saw of this episode was when Sandy shoveled that enormous pile o' grits into her gaping maw. Was that some kind of serving spoon she was using? It was a huge mouthful. Ewww.

[SnarklePuss]

It's just not a soul food show without a Kwanzaa cake. I feel cheated.

I did think she showed remarkable restraint in not adding pumpkin pie spice to the hush puppies (or the dipping sauce.) Once I saw her open that can of sweet potato purée, I figured we were in for some p.p.s. for sure. (To be fair, she did say later on that we could add it to the pecan pie instead of cinnamon.)

I, too, expected her in full southern belle regalia, complete with parasol. Color me disappointed.

Did anyone notice that the faux brand name on the box of cornmeal was LARO? Maybe I just have a dirty mind, but my first thought was to spell that backwards, and it immediately came to mind that the production folks were hinting at how she got (and keeps) this job.

[cissyboo]

What are you supposed to do with a 3" cast iron skillet?

Melt lead to cast your own musket balls, or make your own shot. Or use it as an ashtray (that's what my MIL uses).

I know about Sylvia's-I've used her seasonings as well, it's just white bread, ethnically challenged Sandra in Harlem that I have problems with, maybe she went with the Ladder on one of his political jaunts. But this is the woman who claims to have made that damn daffodil assemblage at Mario Batali's restaurant, so who the hell knows.

Time to edit and format my first post....

[ubi]

I don't know if it's because she took such huge bites, but she is not a pretty taster.

*SERIOUSLY biting my tongue and drawing blood*

[jeanine0123]

Hubby wanted to know why I recorded this after I spent last night reading the snark here. I told him it was for fresh material. He then sat and watched the few minutes to snark with me.

Since when does cornmeal equal soul food? I mean, yes, it's one component but she made it sound like it was the only one. And why the hell would I want to use fish fry coating for my chicken if I already have cornmeal in the cupboard, as evidenced by her adding some to the corn muffin mix (wouldn't that make it extra dry by the way? Gag!)? Just use some cornmeal and flour with your cajun seasoning.

Those frozen, chopped onions were not thawed. If they were they wouldn't have clinked when she poured them into the metal cup.

And why the hell would pumpkin pie spice taste good in pecan pie? Yuck!! And the prattling on about blind baking a pie shell, but you only need to do that if you're using a really wet pie filling. Ummm....you don't get much wetter than pecan pie filling! Yeesh...

And it does not take me a freaking hour and a half to make a damned pis crust, it takes me twenty minutes tops. And no, putting the aluminum pie pan inside a glass pie pan is not going to fool people who have more than two working brain cells.

And that tablescape! How the hell are you supposed to see the people across the table from you?? Everything was three feet high!!

Was it just me, or did those skinny little chicken breasts look twice as thick when she took them out of the oil? And who turned off the oil?? Where's our extra batch of hush puppies?

Hubby wanted to know why it was alright to fry the hush puppies but it was too hard to fry the bacon. And I've had that already cooked bacon stuff and no, it will not impart any kind of smokey flavor to anything.

I didn't know you could buy canned sweet potatoes. Hubby said that it's only available in Sandy-land. Not bad for a man who only saw three minutes of the show. And no, you can not substitute pumpkin pie filling.

I have to say, using the caramel sauce instead of corn syrup in the pecan pie sounded alright. She didn't bastardize that one too much at least.

That salad looked gloppy. And using frozen, thawed peppers and onions in a fresh salad!?? EWWWWW!!! Those things are so limp and mushy when they're thawed out!! Gross, gross, gross!!

And instead of using honey mustard dressing, you could mix honey and mustard together! Well no shit Sherlock! But if you did that you might not meet your quota of processed additives for the day.

Yeah, I think this will have to be a weekly thing, it feels good to snark away. Especially on a day like today when things have been craptastic.

Edited by jeanine0123, Apr 24, 2011 @ 4:32 PM.

[cissyboo]

I didn't know you could buy canned sweet potatoes. Hubby said that it's only available in Sandy-land. Not bad for a man who only saw three minutes of the show. And no, you can not substitute pumpkin pie filling

I've seen canned yams (Bruce's-my daughter loves them), which seem to be synonymous with sweet potatoes in certain parts of the country (They're not! They're two different tubers!). I've never seen canned sweet potato puree-and I've lived in the south (GA, TX, SC), but according to Google, it exists.

[jeanine0123]

Crap, you mean I actually learned something from this show?

Thanks for the info!

Another thing I just thought of. How did those hush puppies stay together if those onions were frozen. They'd thaw once they hit the hot oil and those suckers give off a LOT of water when they thaw.

I know, I know....must not over analyze too much....head will explode.....

Edited by jeanine0123, Apr 24, 2011 @ 4:55 PM.

[grisgris]

Those canned yams with the maple syrup and marshmallow topping made an annual appearance on the childhood Thanksgiving table. Would the onions have time to thaw in the hot oil? I imagine taking bites of raw, cold onions and hard salty bits of bacon and the hushpuppies would probably break apart in your hand.

I miss her bizarre clothes and raccoon eyes and porn star hair.

And instead of using honey mustard dressing, you could mix honey and mustard together!

Because that would be too much "monkey business" and work. We also have to maintain the 70/30% semi-homemade ratio. Plus, those are actually ingredients that most people would have in the "pantry."

[Baysu]

Those frozen, chopped onions were not thawed. If they were they wouldn't have clinked when she poured them into the metal cup.

You beat me to it, I thought the same thing, the onions are still frozen. And then she went on to say that she kept frozen onions in her fridge all the time, really? Frozen, in the fridge. What is so hard about chopping half an onion? What happened to that tool she featured in her other show , the one that chopped onions in a flash?
The tablescape was just awful. Basically the whole show was awful.

[cissyboo]

What happened to that tool she featured in her other show , the one that chopped onions in a flash?

We're now back to being semi-ho, no need to save money! We need to save time! In Sandy-land, the two are mutually exclusive (you can save time OR you can save money), or perhaps I mean literally exclusive?

[jeanine0123]

If you chopped your own onions then you might cry and ruin your perfect make up. Or what you consider to be your perfect make up, it takes a lot of time to get the plaster just right.

[vera charles]

When she mentioned saving time, she said that was the same thing as saving money! (my head is spinning now)

I will have to watch again to see exactly how it went, but when she was putting the pecans into the pie filling, she said something about mixing them in so they would end up all through the filling. Of course, when she cut the pie, the pecans were all on top, just like every pecan pie ever made.

Edited by vera charles, Apr 25, 2011 @ 9:29 AM.

[jeanine0123]

You're right. She did make a big deal about stirring them into the filling and yes, they did rise up to the top like every other pecan pie ever made.

[orchidgal]

If you chopped your own onions then you might cry and ruin your perfect make up. Or what you consider to be your perfect make up, it takes a lot of time to get the plaster just right.

jeanine0123, that is classic. So glad I wasn't trying to take a drink of water or I would have been doing a spit-take. And my laptop would not have appreciated that.

I can't wait to sit down and watch this episode later today with my daughter so I can join in on the snark.

[lillybee]

That tablescape may be one of her worse. It made my eyes bleed.

[grisgris]

If you chopped your own onions then you might cry and ruin your perfect make up. Or what you consider to be your perfect make up, it takes a lot of time to get the plaster just right.

She's actually used that excuse before. That chopping onions make her cry and her mascara would run.... Good question why she doesn't use the slap/chop gadget from MSM.

[jeanine0123]

Better question would be why she doesn't invest in waterproof mascara.

I asked my hubby last night what he thought of mixing bourbon with peach nectar (I don't drink bourbon, other than the one time I had a mint julep, so I didn't have a reference point). The disgusted look on his face and shudder was confirmation that I was right in thinking that it wouldn't be a good combo. Like that's a surprise. And seriously, who on earth uses the entire stem of the mint as part of the garnish? Usually you just pick off the leaves, even for a drink.

[cissyboo]

And seriously, who on earth uses the entire stem of the mint as part of the garnish? Usually you just pick off the leaves, even for a drink.

But then you'd have to find something else to act as the obligatory Sandra Lee cocktail choking hazard! Leaving the stem on saves time! And money!

[jeanine0123]

Wouldn't the free floating leaves be more of a choking hazard? If the stem was still on you would have a chance of being able to use it to fish the leaves out of the poor idiot's throat.

[grisgris]

Well, yes, of course to any logical person. However, the cardinal rules of a SLOP cocktail is that it must include a choking hazard (frozen blueberries are a favorite) or something tall that will poke up in the eye, like a slab of cucumber or pineapple.

[orchidgal]

To paraphrase Aunt Sandy: "Soul food is easy if you know how to use your pantry." Obviously, I've been misusing my pantry for years because all I've been making is real food that actually tastes good.