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18-12: "After The Final Rose" 2011.03.14 (recap)


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#31

MerBear

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Posted Mar 14, 2011 @ 10:29 PM

I actually feel badly for Brad. He is 38, finally gives in totally on national tv, and she all but shot him down tonight. I don't care how many times she said "I love you" to him -- the girl is not committed. Why did she go on the show at all if she couldn't move to the guy's hometown? No way is she leaving Charlotte where a dang hospital wing is named after the father of her daughter -- she's a huge fish in that pond and will always be (and she envisions this for her daughter too -- understandably). So I say "damn you" to Emily for even going on the show at all. I don't blame Brad's cold body language at the end of the show -- he fell for her hard and I can just tell he ain't buying her attempts to sorta/kinda say they'll get married. He knows what's coming. And yes, she looked LOTS better on ATFR. She's a pretty girl.

But I still don't think Chantal was the one he should've chosen...

Edited by MerBear, Mar 14, 2011 @ 10:31 PM.


#32

Kira53

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Posted Mar 14, 2011 @ 10:32 PM

But Emily has a child in school and a support system where she lives now; any woman who would just pack up her daughter and move her to another city for a guy she met on a TV show would be completely irresponsible.


Then she should have withdrawn from the competition when she saw that she was in the running for the final rose. What was she thinking? When she was quizzing Brad it was really her own doubts about what is proper for a mother. She probably shouldn't have been in the competition - what was she thinking? She probably wanted to get a modeling career or something like that and was using it for publicity and opportunities in her home town.

I was shouting to at the TV "Don't pick the mother. Too messy a situation!" Obviously he has the hots for her. On the show "butter wouldn't melt in her mouth" but Brad is finding out her true personality ("I have a temper too"). I never thought that I would be saying poor Brad..... He got hell every Monday and Tuesday. Had she never seen 15 seasons of the show??? Can't accept that she got the guy? Delusional that she is a fun girl? Brad wanted to rescue the Ice Princess - he's got his hands full. Not saying that he doesn't have a temper but I think she would drive me crazy. She won't be able to withstand the press - she'll get even more insecure. She hasn't gotten over the dead lover - she has abandonment issues and self sabotages. What a train wreck.

#33

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Posted Mar 14, 2011 @ 10:38 PM

I think Emily is the first woman on the show to complain about the fantasy dates with the other women. She's right.

I know, she pretty much told the whole world that she couldn't handle the fact that Brad banged Chantal in the Fantasy Suite when, supposedly, Brad had known it was Emily from early on.

#34

LuLu123

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Posted Mar 14, 2011 @ 10:41 PM

Wow - that was just uncomfortable to watch. When Emily said she would have picked Chantal, I fell off the couch.

#35

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Posted Mar 14, 2011 @ 10:43 PM

It may have been ill-advised for Emily to go on the show. But it wasn't unreasonable for her to at least hope that The Bachelor would be possibly somewhat flexible in terms of where he wanted to live.

And I'm not 100% sure that the her "name" in her hometown is what's keeping her from Austin. At least not entirely. I thought her question to Brad during the final episode (i.e. does he know what's involved in being a father) was extremely telling. As was Brad's reaction to her having the gall to actually ask him a question and imply that she had some say in their relationship.

Given what we've seen of Brad, and the way their post-FRC relationship was described tonight, how do you think Brad's likely to react when Emily's daughter is up sick in the middle of the night, or any of the other inconveniences that come along with having a young child?

Also, I wonder how much of Emily's second-thoughts are the result of Michelle? In many ways, Michelle was at least portrayed as the anti-Emily. Yet last week on TWTA, Brad was gushing over how great she was.

In many ways, it's a no-win situation for the Bachelor. But when the woman you've proposed to has a little child to think about and isn't just a young woman out to have fun, there are some things that just won't fly.

-------------------

Oh, and I think Molly has confirmed once and for all our mothers' warning that "if you keep making that face, it'll get frozen that way".

#36

kalibean

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Posted Mar 14, 2011 @ 10:45 PM

No way is she leaving Charlotte where a dang hospital wing is named after the father of her daughter -- she's a huge fish in that pond and will always be (and she envisions this for her daughter too -- understandably).


I think Emily actually likes the idea of not being the big fish for a change, which is likely why she thought she could do the show, move away, etc. But the idea of starting a fresh life without a million ghosts (or at least limited ghosts, since she does have a child) is a lot easier to execute in your head than it is to actually make it happen in person. And I think that is hitting Emily pretty hard right now. I think she can probably get past the other women and all of that other mess, but having to start a brand new life is TOUGH.

#37

soul sister

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Posted Mar 14, 2011 @ 10:49 PM

Not saying that he doesn't have a temper but I think she would drive me crazy.


His own brother basically warned her about his anger issues when he first met her. That's a bit more than 'having a temper'.

Personally I have respect for a woman who values her life enough not to just throw everything in a bag and run after a man just because he gave her a ring, that he didn't even purchase himself. Emily seems to think that the work in a relationship doesn't end just because she's got a ring on her finger. At 38 years old, I think Brad needs a woman who is past the rainbows and unicorns stage.

#38

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Posted Mar 14, 2011 @ 10:50 PM

I do not feel sorry for either of them. He picked the impossible dream over the real relationship, and she apparently thinks she is above the rules of this show. That said, she looked much better with a more natural hair color.

Chantal looked beautiful and I still love her. She is so real and so natural.

I can't believe I am saying this but I liked Molly tonight. Like Chris said, he picked the other girl and she managed to get past it. Emily cannot even handle being the winner who was given a saintly edit and treated like a princess the whole time.

#39

babsb

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Posted Mar 14, 2011 @ 10:51 PM

I think it's about time that one of the "picked" girls complained about the fantasy suite shenanigans. Calling him out in front of viewers was awesome and I give her credit for going there! And since their relationship is doomed (in part because of the aforementioned fantasy suite shenanigans) she might as well get it out there. Even if he didn't have sex with the other girls in the fantasy suite, if he was sooo in love with Emily, he was going to have a lot of explaining to do when she watched the show. He and Chantal looked dead serious going to that tree house fantasy suite. Yikes. I'd kind of like to be a fly on the wall for that conversation.

#40

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Posted Mar 14, 2011 @ 10:52 PM

I'd love to know the deal behind Chris' comment that the wedding was supposed to be today.

Was that a condition of either Brad being cast or of Emily being chosen as F1?

Clearly they wanted a "most [insert hyperbolic adjective of choice] ATFR ever". Instead they got very close to Jake & Vienna 2.

#41

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Posted Mar 14, 2011 @ 10:53 PM

I know, she pretty much told the whole world that she couldn't handle the fact that Brad banged Chantal in the Fantasy Suite when, supposedly, Brad had known it was Emily from early on.


Which if one thinks about it, is completely ridiculous...who does someone in a freaking tree house with no walls in the middle of an African wilderness (that was the Brad and Chantal fantasy suite). Come on, they didn't leave them there alone with no security. But I guess that gives hot monkey sex a whole new meaning!

#42

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Posted Mar 14, 2011 @ 10:55 PM

My impression was that Brad would have very much WANTED the wedding to occur on ATFR (or at least that day) and that Emily put the kibosh on it. I suspect Brad knows it's all slipping away and wanted to make it official sooner rather than later. Good for Emily for having the sense not to go there!

#43

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Posted Mar 14, 2011 @ 10:57 PM

I'm rooting for them. I lost track of how many times Emily said "I love you" to Brad and vice versa during the ATFR tonight. I think Emily is smart, beautiful, and kind. She just needs to know that she can trust Brad. Between the tabloid stories and watching Brad "woo" those other women on the show, she doesn't know if Brad will really be there for her and her daughter. She even said on the final episode that she has major insecurities. Brad, on the other hand, doesn't like to be questioned when he feels like he's being honest. I think those two qualities can account for their major fights. I'm guessing she says "How can I be sure that you love me when you said ..." and he says "How many times have I told you that I love you!!!!" Or something like that. I hope that Emily and Brad go away on vacation together with little Ricki and figure things out.

I say shitty things about reality tv people all the time both on the internet and in real life all the time, but because Brad and Emily made a very good point tonight about how hard it is to live under that scrutiny, I'm going to just wish them well.

#44

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Posted Mar 14, 2011 @ 11:02 PM

I agree that Brad wanted the hurry-up wedding because he could tell Emily was slipping away. He said he's hanging on to her for dear life but she's gonna slip away....

I actually thought the 3 couples who came back to advise were excellent, in this very small world they inhabit like no others have! Their advice was good. Won't help Brad and Emily in the short run (they won't have a long run) but it was worth a try. Still love Ryan Sutter the MOST. What a cutie pie.

#45

dogwoman

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Posted Mar 14, 2011 @ 11:03 PM

Methinks that Emily would pack her bags and move to LA in a nanosecond if Enertainment Tonight came calling.

#46

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Posted Mar 14, 2011 @ 11:03 PM

I know, she pretty much told the whole world that she couldn't handle the fact that Brad banged Chantal in the Fantasy Suite when, supposedly, Brad had known it was Emily from early on.

Which if one thinks about it, is completely ridiculous...who does someone in a freaking tree house with no walls in the middle of an African wilderness (that was the Brad and Chantal fantasy suite). Come on, they didn't leave them there alone with no security. But I guess that gives hot monkey sex a whole new meaning!

Anybody who says that wouldn't piss them off too is either a liar or into polyamory. I don't give a crap if that is the way the show works.

#47

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Posted Mar 14, 2011 @ 11:04 PM

I think Emily's just making him work for it, that's all. She knows what this show is like, knows that the Bachelor has to go through the motions, create drama, act like he's into more than one woman until the very end. And she was the last one standing. He picked her, he proposed, said all the right things, she "won" the big prize. Now he has to prove he really means it, has to court and win her all over without some TV show paying for the magical dates in the exotic places. She really does love him, she just doesn't want it to be too easy for him.

OR

She was never serious about this at all, doesn't really want him and is a ball-breaking b*tch who's going to put him through hell for as long as he's willing to take it.

I guess we'll know soon enough.

#48

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Posted Mar 14, 2011 @ 11:05 PM

I really could have used some Michelle Money this episode to keep it real and tell it like it really is. So much baby talk and too many cliches.

Ok, if someone's family tries to covertly tell you that you will be confronted with your significant other's "bear" personality, don't even finish your glass of wine. Proceed directly to the airline ticket counter and get out of dodge. What they really mean is, "Dude might kill you. This is your warning." Remember OJ.

Also, I noticed that when Emily wanted to say something honest about Brad during the ATFR, she put her hand on his knee and whispered, "Don't get mad" first. That's already battered woman behavior. She should be able to say what she wants without Brad going all Ike Turner later. Just let it go now Emily. Your story is sad enough, I don't want to hear that the next love of your life beat you. I've already seen that Lifetime movie.

I also love how the advice from the veteran bachelor/bachelorettes was don't read the blogs. Oh hear me now and believe me later on, Emily and Brad (if you are still reading) we speak the truth. TWoP therapy is ten times more effective than fake phone therapy any day. You're welcome.

#49

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Posted Mar 14, 2011 @ 11:05 PM

I say shitty things about reality tv people all the time both on the internet and in real life all the time, but because Brad and Emily made a very good point tonight about how hard it is to live under that scrutiny, I'm going to just wish them well.


You have a good attitude..maybe I should be more like you.

#50

Ardently39

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Posted Mar 14, 2011 @ 11:05 PM

I lost track of how many times Emily said "I love you" to Brad and vice versa during the ATFR tonight.


Does anyone remember how many times Deanna and what's-his-name (I really don't remember his name) said "I love you" on her ATFR?
A LOT. And it was completely meaningless. Felt scripted for them and feels scripted for Brad and Emily.

#51

soul sister

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Posted Mar 14, 2011 @ 11:05 PM

Fallacy, I think you said it beautifully.

I have nothing invested in these people so the success or failure of their relationship means less than nothing to me. I didn't watch every episode but I have to say that Emily is the one who stood out for me because she seemed to have the most dignity; she didn't seem to be willing to do ANYTHING just to win the guy. Brad seems frustrated because he might not be getting everything the way he wants it, but if a man has reached his age without being thwarted once or twice, he's pretty damn lucky and I can't weep too many tears for him.

Emily seems like a nice lady and Brad appears to be less of an asshole than I thought he was, so I guess I wish them well too.

#52

KerleyQ

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Posted Mar 14, 2011 @ 11:09 PM

She considers them engaged but doesn't wear her ring? Hmm. I flipped away so I don't know if she gave an explanation for that. My attention span did not allow me to continue watching


I think most of the ATFR's I've seen the guy has put the ring back on the girl's finger. She can't wear it during the intervening months, since it would be a HUGE giveaway that she's won.

Emily actually wants to take the time to get to know the man she met on a reality show? I'm surprised (pleasantly so) to see such maturity in a reality show contestant. Right after she came out, Emily said one of the smartest things I've ever heard someone say on one of these shows, 'I don't know how we fight'. That's really important, folks. The fairy-tale is all when and good, but when the guy who you've been up in an air balloon with says and does something so fucked up that you just want to kill him, how do you handle that? Because Jake and Vienna (or whatever their names were) couldn't do it. Brad has been adamant that he wants to live in Austin. But Emily has a child in school and a support system where she lives now; any woman who would just pack up her daughter and move her to another city for a guy she met on a TV show would be completely irresponsible.

I have no idea if Brad and Emily are going to last (and I don't really care that much) but I think they have a better chance now than they did five minutes after he proposed.


This. I respect that she is fully aware that they haven't had the time to get to know each other outside the constraints of the TV show and the time period between their engagement and when they're allowed to just be a couple. I don't see the sky falling here. Watching their body language, she sat very firmly glued to his side through the whole thing. I thought it was sweet when she turned to him and quietly told him "I love you" while they watched their proposal. This is really the most honest ATFR I think I've ever seen on this show. If they're willing to be that brutally honest in front of the cameras, then I see them being honest with each other and working on things. She said she sees them getting married, she said she still considers them engaged, and she said, multiple times, that she loves him. She just wants to take the time to do this right. I think it's the smartest thing for all involved.

First he basically tells Chantal that he strung her along, without actually saying that. But she knew it and it made her cry.


Another thing I notice is the jlted girl always asks the bachelor why did you keep me there when you knew you were in love with someone else. Its a TV show, he has to keep that person there. Its not a question that can be answered legitimately.


Isn't Chantal one who was a fan of the show before getting there? She didn't know this is how this works? Someone gets strung along. I like Chantal, but I found her tears a bit disingenuous considering she is already moved on into another relationship. I kind of loved when Brad said "from what I hear, you're very happy too." She's not some poor little lovelorn victim here.

Oh, and I think Molly has confirmed once and for all our mothers' warning that "if you keep making that face, it'll get frozen that way".


I love you for this.

I know, she pretty much told the whole world that she couldn't handle the fact that Brad banged Chantal in the Fantasy Suite when, supposedly, Brad had known it was Emily from early on.


I've firmly believed that he and Chantal didn't have sex in that treehouse. Did he confirm otherwise? Honestly, looking at the last few dates he had with her, it was clear he was trying to make things as unromantic as possible. Tree house out in the wild for their FS? Shark bait? If Chantal honestly objectively watches the SA episodes, she has to see the difference in his interaction with her and Emily. That LCD was painfully awkward. I couldn't believe she didn't already have a damn good idea she wasn't the one after that.

Personally I have respect for a woman who values her life enough not to just throw everything in a bag and run after a man just because he gave her a ring, that he didn't even purchase himself


Everything I've heard says that he did purchase the ring himself. (And he wouldn't be the first.) I recall reading somewhere that he said it was important to him to buy the ring himself if he's going to propose to someone.

Like I said, I don't think this is the doom cloud that it's being portrayed. I think she's being sensible. And I don't think that the "temper" discussion indicated violence in any way. Hell, my husband and I both have tempers, but it doesn't mean either of us would ever raise a hand at the other (and haven't in 17 years). And if his temper was of the physically violent variety, I doubt his brothers would have been joking about it with the girl he's dating.

I'm not saying I'm one hundred percent sold that they get married and that's it. But, I do think that it's actually a good sign that they're going into it with their eyes open and that she wants to see how they do once they're free to just be a couple and get to know each other further.

#53

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Posted Mar 14, 2011 @ 11:10 PM

Chantal looked beautiful and I still love her. She is so real and so natural.

Yes. Really, the guy is an idiot. He passed over the girl who not only had more personality and less baggage, but was hotter as well! I hope seeing that debacle brought her some consolation.

#54

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Posted Mar 14, 2011 @ 11:12 PM

Wow, the hair color change made a world of difference on Emily and I thought she finally looked beautiful in a more natural way, but if she had moved that lock of hair away from her face one more time, or run her tongue over those veneers again, I was going to head butt my tv because that was very distracting. Brad was a nervous wreck sitting there like he knew she had his fate right in her hands and his arm around her in the first moments wasn't warm and loving to me - it was half desperate and half controlling. And if a man has a temper that is so well known that his own brother is questioning her about it, then at 38 years old, he will not change. WILL NOT CHANGE. i thought for sure that i could love the temper right out of my husband, but those issues are not fixable. She had some sensible points to make and I had to agree with her that if he let her believe that he had fallen in love with her early on, then it had to be hard to watch those Monday nights, reality show set-up or not. I aggravated myself by liking her tonight because I was proud of my former opinion that she was a vapid, silly, attention-seeking, insipid young woman. On another note, I thought Ryan looked terrible tonight. Very pasty and pale. Roberto looked like he has lost half of his hair and who could blame him. It probably falls out in clumps every time Ali speaks - God the voice on her is grating. Jason and Molly didn't bug me at all and Trista was her usual smug been there-done that-i am the grand-dame of the bachelor series and don't you ever forget it schtick.

#55

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Posted Mar 14, 2011 @ 11:12 PM

Alapaki:

That was the most surreal ATFR I've ever seen. I think Chris was ready to offer Emily money to stay with Brad.


This cracked me up.

I think Chris was ready to reach up, turn his collar around, grab a Bible from under the chair cushion and have Allie, Trista and Molly appear in identical bad dresses to stand at Emily's left side and back while he blocked the front, thrust her hand in Brad's and read them the rites.

Venee:

The body language of Brad spoke volumes in the end. The way he was leaning away from her and the way his temples were pulsating like he was about to blow was so telling.


He was furious. He was about to scratch his scruff then go backstage to demand some water. Here he thought that in South Africa, it was he who had dodged a bullet, by proposing to the woman least likely to even want to live with him...then came on tonight to be bathed in cleansing applause for his true heart...and found himself shot down like a varmint.

How did this happen to me, his body language seethed.. I went from being the guy who won't choose a fiancee, to being the guy his fiancee won't choose.

#56

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Posted Mar 14, 2011 @ 11:13 PM

I was glad to hear a realistic response to seeing the man you love get it on with so many women. Yes, he has to do all that stuff, but still it's another thing to watch it.

I think the show kind of threw Brad and Emily under the bus. In their quest to not having the end of the show spoiled, they seemed to go to great lengths to make it seem like Emily wasn't the one. We saw nothing of their connection and I'm sure the show planted all the rumours of Chantal being F1.

I wish instead of the proposal, they had showed the clip of Brad and his mom where he said she seemed more light hearted with Chantal than with Emily. His mom said that was because she felt she was meeting his future wife when she met Emily, so she took it more seriously. I think that's also a good summary of Chantal and Brad's relationship. They had a lot of fun and a good sexual chemistry, but it never went deeper.

I wonder about Chantal: how long was it from her divorce to going on the show? Then she fell completely in love; she knew without a doubt that Brad was the one. And now she's met another guy who is definitely the one. Some people can't cope with being on their own.

#57

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Posted Mar 14, 2011 @ 11:15 PM

My impression was that Brad would have very much WANTED the wedding to occur on ATFR (or at least that day) and that Emily put the kibosh on it. I suspect Brad knows it's all slipping away and wanted to make it official sooner rather than later. Good for Emily for having the sense not to go there![quote]

Agreed. There is no way that Emily will rush into things. Brad seems to be desperate to get married.Perhaps, he is wary of being blamed if this relationship falls apart.

#58

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Posted Mar 14, 2011 @ 11:18 PM

I think Emily's just making him work for it, that's all. She knows what this show is like, knows that the Bachelor has to go through the motions, create drama, act like he's into more than one woman until the very end.

I think she might be holding out to see if he will just say, "Ok, I'm going to follow you down to where you live because I want to show you how much I want to be with you."

She is in the habit of expecting Brad to go above and beyond, so that might be a hard habit to break.

#59

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Posted Mar 14, 2011 @ 11:18 PM

Chantal and Brad's conversation was very uneven. Chantal wanted to know why Brad kept her till the end if he was not going to pick her. She had asked him to let her go if she wasn't the one because she cared and did not want to be hurt. Brad never really answered her. He kept saying she deserved to be there. Huh? I think it was more that he did enjoy having fun with Chantal. Even Emily saw that when she watched the show.

Brad had fallen hard for the Emily early on. She was this ice princess that he held in awe. He walked on egg shells around her and was always careful on his dates with her. He let loose with Chantal and needed her there for relief and fun. He said himself he was always nervous around Emily. Emily was like that unattainable girl in high school that wouldn't date him. Now he had the chance to own that perfect girl. Brad is in love with the idea of what Emily represents. And Emily has all the control in this relationship.

Emily and Brad are uncomfortable together. I just don't see this lasting. He had what I called a normal fun relationship with Chantal. But Chantal was not that perfect person he saw Emily as. He made his choice. He is so scared of losing Emily he wants to marry her immediately. She is apprehensive. She isn't sure about moving. She has seen his temper. I could see Emily trying to talk Brad into moving to her place if he really wants this relationship. Brad will probably have to give in and move or they will break up.

I laughed at Chris bringing on these 3 successful couples. Jason and Molly was not really the right example to make Emily feel more secure. Jason dumped his chosen one and ran off with second choice. Emily is already jealous of Chantal.

#60

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Posted Mar 14, 2011 @ 11:22 PM

Wow. Brad and Emily both came across as these nice, genteel, calm, polite people on the show....and incredibly awkward together in my opinion but whatever- that might be the edit.

After the show, Brad seems like a controlling, dickwad, hothead.
Emily also seems a bit controlling but I liked her a lot more than on the show. She seems to have her head on straight at least.
Chantal is obviously a little immature when it comes to "love" but I find her very likeable and someone that would be fun to hang out with.