Jump to content

Hoarding: Buried Alive (TLC)


  • Please log in to reply

3527 replies to this topic

#991

grisgris

grisgris

    Fanatic

Posted Mar 5, 2011 @ 1:43 PM

Do you really just turn your back on a family member who is making so little sense as Jahn? Don't you at least try?


You can try up to a point. My father is a hoarder and very disorganized. (My mother is in a nursing home.) He's been that way all of his life and it under treatment for GAD. Thankfully, the house doesn't come close to the state of horror of the houses on TV. His problem isn't that he constantly buys things, he just will not part with anything. He has old stuff from his childhood, as well as old stuff that belonged to his parents.

My siblings and I have tried for years to help him clean up and throw stuff away and he refuses. If we just take charge and start filling trash bags, he gets upset. We've even tried to make a fun game out of it, like, "What'll we find in this bag?"

Finally, we just threw up our hands. It's his problem. So, I don't think that the family members don't care, per se, they are probably just tired and frustrated with banging their heads against the wall.

The idea of removing the hoarder from the house while it's being cleaned up is a good one, but I just think that when they come back home, they'll start all over again.
  • 0

#992

Suz at Large

Suz at Large

    Fanatic

Posted Mar 5, 2011 @ 3:27 PM

You can try up to a point.

grisgris, I totally agree. I know it's a usually impossible situation for the families of hoarders, and for relatives of persons with other mental disorders (some of that knowledge is from personal experience).

Jahn's daughters at least came in and tried to do something, even if it didn't work, and I won't criticize or second-guess them for doing that. They didn't want her living in those conditions and realized the dire condition of both the old falling-down house and Jahn's current home. Unlike Jahn, they saw that the abandoned house was deteriorating and worthless for resale, and that something should be done about it.

I hope Jahn has enough financial resources to keep going for the rest of her life without becoming dependent on her daughters, but if she's finding her Savings Bonds are out at the curb in filthy garbage bags, it's not a good sign of her ability to manage. Jahn is only 62 and may live for years yet, and if things don't get better she could well outlive her money.

But her kids have to take care of themselves and their own families (which I assume they have, and kept out of the show). They can't allow Jahn's craziness to destroy their own lives too.
  • 0

#993

noisebox

noisebox

    Video Archivist

Posted Mar 6, 2011 @ 2:40 AM

Sorry TLC, but A&E does Hoarding better than you. Whenever I watch Hoarding: Buried Alive, it just seems so half-assed. I watched the Jahn episode this week and once again, it seems like the therapist called in doesn't get as in depth with the hoarder as they seem to on Hoarders. I also find the organization specialists and their moving crews to be less empathetic in dealing with the hoarder. Yes, what we see is a whole load of crap, but you are dealing with people who are on a different reality plane. Show their crap some respect and there will be fewer meltdowns.


The daughters have their hands full. They need to find some cash to get their mother some help. Maybe they can knock down the old house and sell the land?
  • 0

#994

whee whee piggy

whee whee piggy

    Couch Potato

Posted Mar 6, 2011 @ 2:57 AM

The daughters have their hands full. They need to find some cash to get their mother some help. Maybe they can knock down the old house and sell the land?


They told the mother the estimate they got was $50,000 for the property as a tear-down. Mom was horrified of course, because that was her 'retirement' money.

I truly find this show even more depressing than Intervention. Even with the horrible success rate for addicts, hoarders seem even worse. This is some serious screwy rewiring of the brain.
  • 0

#995

FlockRapid

FlockRapid

    Fanatic

Posted Mar 6, 2011 @ 10:33 AM

I truly find this show even more depressing than Intervention. Even with the horrible success rate for addicts, hoarders seem even worse. This is some serious screwy rewiring of the brain.


To a point, I think it's mental illness and to a point I think it's clever manipulators who know damn well just how to make everyone around them dance to their tune. And I think that's that I get so angry when I watch these shows (and to a point don't watch anymore because I understand the monstrous game these people are playing).

A hoarder isn't generally mentally ill enough to actually be forcibly committed... and judging by the angry shouting and declarations, most of them are fully aware that anyone who comes into their home has to acknowledge that. They also know that they have a mental illness and are not shy about using that as a sympathy ploy.

So you get the dramatic clutching of hands to the breast, the "I can't breathe, I am so anxious!", and "I really feel I might kill myself" coupled with "This is MY home!" and "You have to respect my things because I am a responsible adult". They know if they whine and moan long enough, they will get their way, and more importantly, if they whine and moan loud enough and cry enough, *someone* is going to sympathize with them and throw down the mental illness card and let them off the hook. Being a hoarder allows you to have all the indignant rage you want, and then when shit really gets serious.... oh, I'm mentally ill, so bring on the pity party.

Frankly, I think the first mistake - and its a natural one - is that once authorities are involved, the hoarder gets way too many chances to clean up. they *know* they can drag it out over years and they do, and they know that when the end finally comes, they'll get to be the victims.
  • 0

#996

cjames

cjames

    Video Archivist

Posted Mar 9, 2011 @ 11:41 PM

Tonight's show wasn't nearly as bad as some we've soon. Both are maybe level 4 hoarders - people could walk around both places without stepping on things and the floor was visible.

Although it was funny watching the woman wanting to keep all those boxes because banana boxes, with all those holes, are so useful don't you know. At the end, when the sons saw how much was outside and being wrecked by rain (but she wouldn't throw it out), they really seemed to understand what it means for their mom to be a hoarder.

When the daughter of the other hoarder said that she wasn't comfortable sitting in his kitchen, I really felt for her. I loved that she was gently honest with her dad. Based on the way she talked about not needing to tell him what to do anymore, I'm guessing that she's had some therapy to learn how to deal with him.

These episodes might not be showing dramatic hoards but they're definitely showing the huge impact on the family and how unfixable the hoarding problem is. These hoarders have been less successful cleaning up than last season - or maybe the families are better at figuring out that the hoarder has moved stuff around.

Re-watching Jahn's episode, I see that the organizer wasn't the right person for Jahn. I'd thought she was ok at first and I'm seeing that this isn't the case.

It seemed like she wasn't really able to articulate WHY going through one item at a time was better; she only knew that this was the way things were supposed to be done. So when faced Jahn's opposition, she had absolutely no idea how to handle it.

And really, if someone came in and said, "we're going to do things this way because that's the way we do it" I'd probably balk, too. And the more the person repeated that this is the way to do it the more I'd want to do things in a different way.
  • 0

#997

Trader Joe

Trader Joe

    Couch Potato

Posted Mar 10, 2011 @ 12:41 AM

Suz at Large
Trader Joe, I think I saw "Glen Ellyn" stenciled on the side of Jahn's trash can,


Hi Suz! We watched the end of this rerun and I did see Glen Ellyn! You've got a faster eye than I have!


HEY!! TV Guys, Glen Ellyn is NOT "just outside" of Chicago. Its a good hour.

Edited by Trader Joe, Mar 10, 2011 @ 12:43 AM.

  • 0

#998

stephf13

stephf13

    Couch Potato

Posted Mar 10, 2011 @ 9:11 AM

Although it was funny watching the woman wanting to keep all those boxes because banana boxes, with all those holes, are so useful don't you know. At the end, when the sons saw how much was outside and being wrecked by rain (but she wouldn't throw it out), they really seemed to understand what it means for their mom to be a hoarder.


I'm potentially going to Hell for this, but I was cracking up at the end when the sons were standing in the kitchen, reflecting on the severity of their mom's problem, and she could be seen through the window, running around, covering her hoard with tarps in the rain. It was very comical.

Her house was fantastic, and it's a shame she let it get that way. Her sons were a couple of cuties, though, weren't they?
  • 0

#999

dogwoman

dogwoman

    Loyal Viewer

Posted Mar 10, 2011 @ 9:31 AM

The minute they saw Jahn's living conditions, her daughters should have called Adult Protective Services and the fire marshall. The woman is so obviously mentally ill that emergency involuntary committment should be a no brainer.
  • 0

#1000

Toaster Strudel

Toaster Strudel

    Fanatic

Posted Mar 10, 2011 @ 9:59 AM

Banana Box Sharon stealing chairs from her friend's house... good grief... of course for a craft project where she was going to re-cover them with "her fabric." Craft projects from now to eternity.

What stood out for me in this episode is the maniacal orgasmic gurgling that came out of this ridiculous, ridiculous woman when she was describing her junky shopping network rocks ($2500???), jewelry, with the same quivering excitement as the free, useless banana boxes with their subway entrance size gaping holes in the bottoms. Her jewelry orgasms were especially embarrassing to watch, she was probably holding herself back, too. I'm sure she weed in her pants a little.

She's like a human version of the Vogelkop Bower Bird, without the organizational skills.
  • 0

#1001

auntie thesis

auntie thesis

    Couch Potato

Posted Mar 10, 2011 @ 11:20 AM

Hoarder 1: Banana Box Sharon
- Another "my marriage ended, my kids left and now I must fill my home with junk to compensate for the emptiness" person
- Nice home...had goat paths and the fridge was still accessible, as was the bathroom.
- She actually cleaned her goat paths (the vacuuming made me giggle a little because seriously...why bother?)
- Her precious crystals were JUNK. Period. I almost died laughing when she said the big one was supposed to help hoarders. Wtf???
- I loved the therapist and the organizer. Both of them stood up to her and didn't let her get away with bs tactics. I was kind of hoping for a cat fight between Banana Box Sharon and Ms. Romantic....but alas, it didn't happen.
- And of course, at the end we see that Banana Box Sharon merely shifted the hoard out to the porch. She has no intention of changing. *sigh*


Hoarder 2: Mr. Living in the Past
- Yet another "my marriage ended, my kids left and now I must fill my home with junk to compensate for the emptiness" person
- Dust, dust, dust! Dust mite village, anyone?
- "I like turkey burgers...."
- What, you don't want to eat in my home??
- I really liked the organizer. She was patient and encouraging.
- "I'm so fortunate to have a great daughter who will take care of me." Uhm, hello...creepy much?
- I'd like to know where he shifted his hoard...because I don't believe for one minute that he actually got rid of all that junk.
  • 0

#1002

cjames

cjames

    Video Archivist

Posted Mar 10, 2011 @ 12:04 PM

Banana Box Sharon stealing chairs from her friend's house... good grief... of course for a craft project where she was going to re-cover them with "her fabric." Craft projects from now to eternity.

OMG can you imagine being her friend and discovering that she stole your chairs (among other things)? I'd have freaked out a lot more than she did!

I'm potentially going to Hell for this, but I was cracking up at the end when the sons were standing in the kitchen, reflecting on the severity of their mom's problem, and she could be seen through the window, running around, covering her hoard with tarps in the rain. It was very comical.

I'm right beside you on the train to hell. I was howling while she ran around covering her already-soaked hoard with tarps! That's crazy behaviour.

I alternated between howling and recoiling when she was showing off her stones and jewelry. Howling because she was so excited over crap and recoiling because she was a little too excited, if you know what I mean.
  • 0

#1003

simpleHope

simpleHope

    Couch Potato

Posted Mar 10, 2011 @ 1:23 PM

To Sharon's sons: I get you. I really do. I too would have stood inside and let the rain ruin her "treasures." It is like talking to a 5 year old. "If you want this toy then you must take good care of it."

A 4,000 square foot house, owned by one person, FILLED?! Geez that is a lot of crap. I could see a messy room or two, one room just used for storage, but goodness that woman has too much free time. And why didn't the magic crystals sprout legs and help her out? That is what she bought them for.

I was so pleased to hear her friend say "Now I understand why your sons are so upset with you." They needed someone to back them up.
  • 0

#1004

Chocokitty27

Chocokitty27

    Channel Surfer

Posted Mar 10, 2011 @ 3:52 PM

I was actually contemplating a turkey burger for dinner until I saw them displayed on Hoarders.

Thanks, Hoarders, for helping my spring cleaning obsession and now my diet.
  • 0

#1005

Pepper Mostly

Pepper Mostly

    Fanatic

Posted Mar 10, 2011 @ 4:40 PM

Sharon was one of those hoarders who can function fine in the world, but get her in a corner, make her explain why she needs 3,000 boxes, and she gets more skittish than a newly released possum, and meaner than cat shit. Wow. She was really something.
  • 0

#1006

aliyameadow

aliyameadow

    Fanatic

Posted Mar 10, 2011 @ 8:47 PM

And why didn't the magic crystals sprout legs and help her out? That is what she bought them for.


Hee hee. That was pretty good. I knew it was going to be a bumpy ride when she went on about the crystals. WTF? Stones are nice to look at and wear, but who believes having a certain stone is going to help hoarders (or anything/body else for that matter?). And the stuff in the rain - priceless. Yes, it's all so precious, but it's out in the yard getting soaked.

What I still don't get about many of these folks is they weren't always hoarders. They get divorced or the kids leave and boom, the hoarding begins. I'm pretty sure that when aliya jr moves out, I'm not going to start hoarding. I just don't see the connection between life events (other than growing up in terrible poverty, in which case I can see wanting to hold on to what you have, maybe) and ending up with a place so full of stuff you have to take a dump in a plastic bag.
  • 0

#1007

JudyObscure

JudyObscure

    Fanatic

Posted Mar 11, 2011 @ 6:01 AM

"I'm so fortunate to have a great daughter who will take care of me." Uhm, hello...creepy much?

Yes, yes he was. Maybe even creepier was his instant attraction to the organizer as he said something like, "Ordering me around gently, I love that." I knew he was going to do fine so long as he had his new mommy-figure there to tell him what to do.

I keep wanting to play matchmaker for these people, there must be lots of bossy women who would be happy to take Mr. Turkey Burger in hand, he just craved some strict discipline. His sweet dimpled daughter would be perfect for one of Sharon's sons. Sharon herself is beyond hope, I believe she's secretly married to her jewelry.
  • 0

#1008

AngelaHunter44

AngelaHunter44

    Fanatic

Posted Mar 11, 2011 @ 1:03 PM

Mr. Turkey Burger in hand, he just craved some strict discipline.


Maybe that would be a good solution. Instead of an organizer they could hire a dominatrix to crack a whip and make him clean up.
  • 0

#1009

walnutqueen

walnutqueen

    Fanatic

Posted Mar 11, 2011 @ 3:48 PM

Maybe that would be a good solution. Instead of an organizer they could hire a dominatrix to crack a whip and make him clean up.

Heh! I have a recurring fantasy that I'll find some freak who loves to clean my house, and all I need to do is "crack the whip". Repulsive as it may sound, a clean house just might be worth it!

I laughed nervously at the jewelry obsessed lady - been there, done that. And to this day I still get overly excited talking about the fantabulous bedroom suite I scored years ago for $70.00 - I am much in touch with my inner hoarder!
  • 0

#1010

Luciaphile

Luciaphile

    Fanatic

Posted Mar 12, 2011 @ 9:41 AM

I just don't see the connection between life events (other than growing up in terrible poverty, in which case I can see wanting to hold on to what you have, maybe) and ending up with a place so full of stuff you have to take a dump in a plastic bag.


From what I've read, it's that for some people, these kinds of life events serve as triggers. They might have the tendencies, but they manage to keep them under control or it's not so noticeable. If the person has the predisposition for hoarding or maybe does it on a small scale, the traumatic event can set it off. It's not that the divorce or the death of a loved one or a serious illness causes the hoarding, it's that it sets something off.
  • 0

#1011

OSM Mom

OSM Mom

    Fanatic

Posted Mar 13, 2011 @ 1:23 PM

"I'm so fortunate to have a great daughter who will take care of me." Uhm, hello...creepy much?


He was incredibly creepy IMO. I got a "Chester the Molester" vibe from him somehow. He really gave me the creeps. His daughter really needs to just break the ties and go live her life. Is she married or have kids or anything? I don't remember them mentioning that..or maybe I just missed it.
  • 0

#1012

Quickbeam

Quickbeam

    Fanatic

Posted Mar 13, 2011 @ 10:18 PM

Just watched the "near Milwaukee" episode with Angry Tammy, Goofy Vanessa and Grandpa who can't come home from the rehab hospital due to the crap on the floor. As a nurse I've had that patient...the family stalls on the home visit and then you find out there isn't 6" of space for the disabled person to maneuver.

Sympathy all around, of course but I'd love to know the annual cost of extra hospitalization for people whose homes are not fit for their return. I'll bet the 15 seconds after their stroke they are thinking "oh, no someone is going to have to come to the house".
  • 0

#1013

Jennshark

Jennshark

    Channel Surfer

Posted Mar 13, 2011 @ 10:39 PM

Was that poor kid (Vanessa) missing her front upper teeth?! Poor baby, is 14 years-old too old for someone to call CPS on?
  • 0

#1014

AngelaHunter44

AngelaHunter44

    Fanatic

Posted Mar 13, 2011 @ 11:44 PM

Was that poor kid (Vanessa) missing her front upper teeth?!


Yes! Shocking and inexcusable. I bet the kid has never seen a dentist in her life and it's outrageous. Mom can afford dogs and guinea pigs and all that goes with them, yet no dental care for her kid.
  • 0

#1015

angelmom1

angelmom1

    Fanatic

Posted Mar 13, 2011 @ 11:58 PM

Yes, and she also had a speech impairment due to missing teeth. Someone should call CPS on this family. The mother seemed very mentally ill to me and is obviously not providing a good home (the pasta and mayo crap they were eating was also nauseating!).

The other woman who couldn't be bothered to sweep up the dog hair just made me sick. I understand being depressed but to live in squalor like that, especially when she worked in some high end furniture store-just can't understand it. I do wonder if these people lose their jobs after being on this show. I really wouldn't want Susie to be sitting on expensive furniture after seeing her get dressed from the crap she piles on the floor. On the other hand she seemed to make a lot of progress so there is that.
  • 0

#1016

3 is enough

3 is enough

    Fanatic

Posted Mar 14, 2011 @ 1:12 AM

OMG that poor girl! I hope that some dentist in their area sees the show and offers to fix her teeth for free. I'm sure they have no dental insurance. I just wanted to reach through the tv and slap some sense into the mother.
  • 0

#1017

LucyJJane

LucyJJane

    Couch Potato

Posted Mar 14, 2011 @ 1:22 AM

Was that poor kid (Vanessa) missing her front upper teeth?!


I noticed that too. What's also sad about this episode is the mother's obesity, and the fact that she seemed to have totally brainwashed the daughter into her way of thinking in regards to the grandfather and her hoarding tendencies. This show always makes me so very sad.
  • 0

#1018

Rhettwoods

Rhettwoods

    Couch Potato

Posted Mar 14, 2011 @ 2:28 AM

I believe that Tammy said she had had a kidney transplant due to her diabetes. She probably has to take steroids to help with the transplant, and that would add to the obesity, especially the fullness of her face. On the other hand, grandpa and grandma (as we saw in the pictures) had significant weight issues, too. That poor child with the missing teeth; how she must be teased at school (especially after this episode). Did you see how filthy that blanket was that Tammy was using? I think that was sour cream on the pasta, not mayo, but I don't recall seeing the container it came out of.
Susie was a little better, but her going on and on about how she can't just jump out of bed "like normal people". Hahaha. I've never "jumped" out of bed in my life -- first it's two hits on the snooze button, then the bedside lamp gets turned on, then a few stretches, etc.
At least Tammy and whoever else got the house cleaned up enough for the OWNER of the house to come home and not get injured in his own house.
  • 0

#1019

Major Misfit

Major Misfit

    Fanatic

Posted Mar 14, 2011 @ 5:00 AM

OMG that poor girl! I hope that some dentist in their area sees the show and offers to fix her teeth for free. I'm sure they have no dental insurance.

That broke my heart. From the looks of it, she was missing a lot of back teeth, too.

And I'm sorry TLC, but you can't just drape white sheets over someone's hoard and have us believe they're on the road to recovery. The divorce/dog hair lady's living room was still a mess. And I wish they'd have shown her actually throwing her crap away - like what became of the landfill of garbage bags from her back yard?
  • 0

#1020

josieb

josieb

    Video Archivist

Posted Mar 14, 2011 @ 5:21 AM

I work as a kidney transplant coordinator. Tammy did say she had to get a transplant due to diabetes. While I agree that her giant face is probably worsened by steroids, the maintenance steroid dose one year after transplant is generally quite low. Especially for a diabetic person (we would use about 5mg twice dailly). Probably not enough to account for her Cushingoid appearance unless she has had any rejection episodes. In light of her saying she can't bend down to pick up a trash bag because of her bad knees, I think there is much more wrong with Miss Tammy. I think the show said she got her kidney a year ago. At her current weight, she would not have been a candidate at our facility. Kidneys are not considered life-saving organs (because you always have dialysis) but quality of life. I do not see how her quality of life has improved by having this transplant. I am sickened by the lack of hygeine in this household that this immunosuppressed woman is in. She needs to take responsibility for herself and her health. No diabetic and certainly no one on immunosuppression should be eating big bowls of tortellini with two giant globs of Miracle Whip! She is no doubt going to be dead of heart disease in no time at all. I bet Tammy's transplant center is going crazy after watching this episode! I know I was angry after watching.
  • 0