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Gleeful Quotes: "There's NOTHING Ironic About Show Choir!"


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#1

Snark Shark

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Posted Aug 31, 2009 @ 1:26 AM

Get at it... you... SLOPPY BABIES!

The Pilot was ALREADY full of great quotes.
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#2

Rant

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Posted Aug 31, 2009 @ 5:49 AM

"Girls don't have prostates! I looked it up." - Puck

As a nurse, that whole exchange had me rolling.

Edited by Rant, Sep 4, 2009 @ 5:56 AM.

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#3

redbirds

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Posted Aug 31, 2009 @ 9:33 AM

"Your resentment is delicious" - Sue ( she probably will need a whole quote thread herself.)

Edited by redbirds, Aug 31, 2009 @ 9:33 AM.

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#4

myintermail

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Posted Aug 31, 2009 @ 11:42 AM

Emma: Who says cheerleaders are performers?

Finn: I don't even know who Chronic Lady (name of a weed) is!

Quinn: Wait.... Let's pray!

Sue: You think that's hard? Try living with hepatitis.. Now THAT'S hard!

Sue: That's sloppy... you're sloppy babies!
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#5

Snark Shark

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Posted Aug 31, 2009 @ 1:26 PM

More from the Pilot:

Rachel: "You may think that every guy in school would want to tap this, but my Myspace schedule keeps me way to busy to date."

Rachel: "I am not homophobic. In fact, I have two gay dads. See, I was born out of love. My two dads screened potential surrogates based on beauty and IQ. Then they mixed their sperm together and used a turkey blaster. To this day we don't know which one is my real dad, which I think is pretty amazing."


Here's the exchange the entire thread (well, at least the title) is based around...
Rachel: Mr. Schuester, do you have any idea how ridiculous it is to give the lead solo in "Sit Down, You're Rocking the Boat" to a boy in a wheelchair?
Artie: I think Mr. Shoe's using irony to enhance the performance.
Rachel: There's nothing ironic about show choir!

Sue: You think that's hard? Try living with hepatitis.. Now THAT'S hard!

Sue: "You think this is hard, try being waterboarded, that's hard."


Plenty left. Mercedes had some gems, and every single thing out of Sue's mouth was quotable.

Edited by Snark Shark, Aug 31, 2009 @ 1:28 PM.

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#6

redbirds

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Posted Aug 31, 2009 @ 2:28 PM

Tina: WWWe're doomed.

Edited by redbirds, Sep 3, 2009 @ 9:43 AM.

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#7

nme525

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Posted Sep 1, 2009 @ 4:41 AM

You're very talented. I should know, I'm very talented too.
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#8

raceguy120390

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Posted Sep 1, 2009 @ 4:48 AM

Mercedes: Oh, HELL to the no! Look, I'm not down with this background singin' nonsense. I'm Beyoncé, I ain't no Kelly Rowland.

Edited by TWoP Gadget, Sep 1, 2009 @ 11:19 AM.

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#9

redbirds

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Posted Sep 1, 2009 @ 3:34 PM

Rachel: " I won my first dance contest when I was 3 months old".
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#10

Titus

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Posted Sep 2, 2009 @ 11:19 PM

Mercedes: Oh, HELL to the no! Look, I'm not down with this background singin' nonsense. I'm Beyoncé, I ain't no Kelly Rowland.


That was awesomely hilarious!

Sue: That was the most offensive thing I've seen in twenty years, and that includes an elementary school production of Hair.

Edited by Titus, Sep 3, 2009 @ 5:00 PM.

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#11

Souris

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Posted Sep 2, 2009 @ 11:26 PM

Sue: Wipe that agony off your face.
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#12

redbirds

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Posted Sep 2, 2009 @ 11:47 PM

“Fame is the most important thing in our culture now. And if there’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s that no one’s just gonna hand it to you.”


I guess she hasn't watch the Hills.
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#13

corvus13

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Posted Sep 3, 2009 @ 1:54 AM

Finn, after Mr. Shoe tells him he might lose his football scholarship:

I have a football scholarship?

Edited by corvus13, Sep 3, 2009 @ 1:55 AM.

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#14

Lauriestar

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Posted Sep 3, 2009 @ 9:40 AM

I'll pee in a cup! I'LL PEE.
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#15

Prettyeyes

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Posted Sep 4, 2009 @ 9:37 AM

One of my favorite quotes is a sign in the faculty lounge: "You must be trained by Ken Tanaka to use this shredder."

The quotes on this show are like great lyrics without music.
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#16

redbirds

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Posted Sep 4, 2009 @ 3:36 PM

Another sign...

On the board behind Rachel when she gets slushied...

Lima...like in the bean.
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#17

cutecouple

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Posted Sep 4, 2009 @ 3:48 PM

Sue: "That was The most offensive thing I've seen in twenty years of teaching, and that includes an elementary school production of Hair."
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#18

sixesses

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Posted Sep 4, 2009 @ 8:34 PM

Coach:

"Last month, they held down one of their teammates and shaved off his eyebrows just because he watches Grey's Anatomy"

Finn:

"He died in Iraq the first time we were fighting Osama bin laden"
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#19

Fabrisse

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Posted Sep 5, 2009 @ 11:47 AM

Terry (Will's Wife): But Will, I'm on my feet four hours a day three days a week here, and then I have to go home and cook dinner for myself.

Sandy: You're the one teaching those tone-deaf acne factories...
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#20

12916studios

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Posted Sep 6, 2009 @ 2:11 AM

When Will is talking to Finn about the pot, just after he tells him that he could lose his football scholarship or go to jail, the camera zooms in briefly on a newspaper clipping tacked to the wall that reads: "Priority #1: Help the Kids."

I didn't notice it until Wednesday's showing of the director's cut, but it had me in stitches. I love the fact that there are little details in the background that you have to pay attention to see. It's so Arrested Development.
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#21

Hawkwild

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Posted Sep 8, 2009 @ 10:21 AM

Sue: "And I want the agony out of your eyes!"
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#22

Wolf

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Posted Sep 8, 2009 @ 11:49 AM

I'm not 100% certain on this, but I believe the actual line is "You think this is hard? I'm living with hepatitis C! That's hard!"

"You don't have to do this. You have the power here!" It was a little outlandish and out of place in this show, but still, loved that line.

If someone snarkily calls Quinn "Cordelia," I will officially become this show's biggest fan. "Brooke" would also work although it would not be nearly as satisfying.
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#23

Bubbles258

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Posted Sep 8, 2009 @ 8:04 PM

Terri Scheuster: "It's not wrong to want nice things, AND TO HAVE A GLUE GUN THAT WORKS!!!!"

Makes me laugh every time.
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#24

24addict

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Posted Sep 9, 2009 @ 8:59 PM

Sue: "Maybe Justice wept today."
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#25

Demian

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Posted Sep 9, 2009 @ 9:00 PM

Time for some girl talk, Man Hands.

#26

Allie5687

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Posted Sep 9, 2009 @ 10:26 PM

Sue: "Maybe Justice wept today."


I thought it was, "Lady Justice wept today."
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#27

Spriteshadow

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Posted Sep 9, 2009 @ 10:30 PM

Talking about Rachel's lack of a gag reflex... I don't know the exact line, but it was something to the effect of "You'll be glad of that when you're older."

I can't believe that made it past the censors....
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#28

Bubbles258

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Posted Sep 9, 2009 @ 10:42 PM

"Oh, hell to the no. I swear, if you kick me again, I will cut you." (Mercedes)
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#29

Titus

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Posted Sep 9, 2009 @ 11:03 PM

Sue: "You watch your tone, young lady! Gay parents encourage rebellion -- there's studies on this."
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#30

Soleil

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Posted Sep 9, 2009 @ 11:10 PM

Emma's pamphlets:
Ouch! That Stings!
Divorce: Why Your Parents Stopped Loving You
I Can't Stop Touching Myself
Radon: The Silent Killer
My Mom's Bipolar and she Won't Stop YELLING
Wow! There's A Hair Down There!
So You Like Throwing Up: Understanding and Overcoming Bulimia


Props to Titus for posting these in the episode thread.
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