56 replies to this topic

[Ticky]

Ticklet was sitting next to me eating breakfast while this was on. First, he commented on what a shitty job of handwashing she did. But, to be fair, none of the TV people know how to wash their hands. Then, when she spooned the canned chili over the whack-a-dough triangles, he said, “Canned chili, ewwwww. Looks like diarrhea." When I looked sideways at him, he clarified, "That’s what canned chili is, dude. It’s cow diarrhea that they catch.” Gotta love the imagery.

**giddy joy** “I made Sandra Lee proud. Yayyyyyy.” This woman has no standards.

Edited: sorry, I typed "2009.2.21" instead of "2009.02.21" in the thread title. If that could be fixed, I would appreciate it. I don't think I can. Thanks.

Edited by Ticky, Feb 21, 2009 @ 10:29 AM.

[GenieinTX]

Canned chili + canned crescent rolls = Mexican food. Yep.

Somehow I think that the show made that semi homemaker semi up her recipe more than it was. The fact that she asked the deli person to chop up a chicken for her (in perfect cubes) and got prechopped onion both rang false to me. The semi homemaker said one onion, not one cup chopped onions. I'd chop my own chicken and chop my own onion, but I would make that, it looked pretty good. And Aunt Drunky took two bites of it.. two bites! That's got to be a record.

She was really excited for cocktail time, wasn't she? I can't decide what those cherries looked in the flan, but it didn't look good. Kind of like gunshot wounds on a CSI cadaver or something.

Edited by GenieinTX, Feb 21, 2009 @ 10:46 AM.

[orchidgal]

There is no way that those whack-a-crescent rolls would hold up when one tried to eat them without cutting them first. Tortillas would have at least been more authentic.

Did Sandy run out of time describing her tablescape again?

[PaminBB]

Pretty uninspiring effort. I'm guessing they came up with some semi-Mexican crap to go with the semi-homemaker's "recipe".

A _real_ Semi-Ho effort would have included an inedible salad with defrosted corn and canned black beans piled on bagged greens. She tried to crap up the soup, but her heart just didn't seem to be in it.

[homecookinggirl]

That rabbit turd flan was pretty vile. As was everything else.

[cal331]

Obvious MV touch: the beauty shot of the 'flan' had carmel sauce pooled on the plate. In Snad's actual dessert, the carmel goop was absorbed into the instant pudding stuff. Looked pretty hideous, too.

Can't believe Snads didn't know this supposed Semi-Ho-Guest. She seemed to talk about her husband as if they knew each other, plus she kissed said guest after tasting her enchiladas. Hm. That sounds weird!

[VNutt]

WTF was with the hand gesture when she was adding the oil to the pan? Trying out for Vanna's job?

"The enchilada sauce at the bottom is a GREAT idea so they don't stick." Because no other enchilada recipe, ever, in the whole entire world, has used this instruction. Really. It's all a Semi-Ho idea.

Another "WTF?" when she sliced off the stem end of the avocado. And yes, Sandy, there is a wrong way to make tortilla soup... your way.

I'm pretty flan-adverse in the first place... her flan did not help that.

Um... even if you do a terracotta pot with charcoal that is inside another terracotta pot, don't you run the risk of both pots getting very hot to the point your Fiesta Tablescape becomes a Fireman Rescue-scape?

[cartmann99]

Um... even if you do a terracotta pot with charcoal that is inside another terracotta pot, don't you run the risk of both pots getting very hot to the point your Fiesta Tablescape becomes a Fireman Rescue-scape?

That is true but, you would get to meet the firemen and you wouldn't have to eat Sandy's food. Sounds like a win-win to me.

[GothicGirltx]

Ok, in Texas we don't put olives on Mexican food. Is that a North or Mid-West thing?

The flan made me sad. It would taste like almond extract with a mushy cherry in it. Yuck!

The enchilada recipe was not awful ... if one used real chicken and made chili gravy it would be better but overall it was just meh. The sour cream sauce looked like man gravy ... no thanks!

I am thinking I may try those chili cheese slices next time I do a test kitchen video. They just looked like fail.

That 'soup' she made was odd. I think it would taste like bland tomato soup. The avocado looked good. Yay for her fresh touches.

Is it just me, or are the arrangements by the sink getting bigger every episode? Soon they will take over and it will be the Semi-Homemade Cooking with Ginormus Flower Arrangement. Might improve the show.

I did not hate her outfits today. That dark blue does not make Sandy look like the washed up, drunken, social climbing lush she really is. Blasphemy.

don't you run the risk of both pots getting very hot to the point your Fiesta Tablescape becomes a Fireman Rescue-scape?

Yes, but if her drunken friends are coming that is just fine! Remember the Girls Kocktail party episode when they waxed poetic about firemen? Be afraid!!

Edited by GothicGirltx, Feb 21, 2009 @ 12:45 PM.

[ChristineLynne]

Classic Sandy: holds raw turkey with her left hand, drops it in the pot, grabs the pot handle with her slimy left hand, then is so careful to tell us to wash our hands after handling raw meat. Of course she soon grabs the handle again, and proceeds to contaminate the entire kitchen. And then has a pregnant guest on - I hope she didn't eat anything.

I lerve me some avocado, but I fear that SLOPping the hot soup on top would cook it and make it nasty. I think she saw someone provide garnish for tortilla soup at the table - onion, avocado, cheese, cilantro, sour cream - and got confused and just added all that to the giant pot of soup.

The "flan" was revolting. That weird syrup that came in the box frightened me, and the shot with the cherries kind of peeking out looked like some unspeakable larvae were gestating in the dessert, waiting to burst forth. Gak!

[cartmann99]

Is it just me, or are the arrangements by the sink getting bigger every episode. Soon the will take over and it will be the Semi-Homemade Cooking with Ginormus Flower Arrangement. Might improve the show.

Didn't she say in her magazine, that Miracle Gro was on the list of her favorite products? Someone must be feeding it to 'Gino'.

The last few tablescapes have been disappointing to me. After seeing shows like Berry Time last week, I miss the complete insanity of the older tablescapes!

The "flan" was revolting. That weird syrup that came in the box frightened me, and the shot with the cherries kind of peeking out looked like some unspeakable larvae were gestating in the dessert, waiting to burst forth. Gak

It was like they had remade the movie Alien with flan.

Edited by cartmann99, Feb 21, 2009 @ 1:12 PM.

[Pj3422]

It was like they had remade the movie Alien with flan.

I really want this on a T-shirt or embroidered on a pillow.

[KCMOCook]

What a strange episode. First, the HUGE floral arrangements and weird blue curtains with yellow junk around them.

Nachos, only made with whack-a-dough -- inspiring. ITA with the person who stated that they'd be difficult to eat.

The soup didn't look that good. Yes, wouldn't the avocados sort of melt? Ish... Very SLOP-py presentation in the soup bowl. Atten-shun to detail?

Sandy did seem very chummy with the semi-homemaker almost to the point of overkill. I also thought the semi-homemaker seemed uncomfortable with the chopped onions and cubed chicken. Did anybody notice that in the final product that the chicken was shredded? Sandra was putting WAY too much filling in her enchiladas.

Was the semi-homemaker a teacher? What was that all about when Sandra whispered something to her like, "I'm coming to your class." (I hope it's not home ec.) Yep, the sour cream sauce looked gross. Why mess it up with chicken broth and jarred garlic?

"I made Sandra Lee proud!" I was thinking more along the lines that finding another deal like "All you can drink for $12.00" would earn you a gold star from Sandy.

There were no words for the flan. It really did look like some kind of alien life form.

I swear that when she was making the cocktail, she said, "Flemon juice."

Stupid, stupid, stupid idea about the terracotta and briquettes. Wouldn't it be more important to keep the enchiladas or soup warm instead of those insipid appetizers?

[orchidgal]

I thought the flan looked like it had a bad case of acne.

And the white sauce on the enchiladas did look vile. What's wrong with a dollop of sour cream? Or is that not done with enchiladas?

(Dang, now I have that song from the Daisy™ Sour Cream commercial stuck in my head.)

Edited for clarity (because it would be nice if you actually knew what I meant).

Edited by orchidgal, Feb 21, 2009 @ 3:46 PM.

[kishisan]

I thought the flan looked like the spawn of Monty Python's Blancmange.

Image
YouTube

[orchidgal]

Stupid, stupid, stupid idea about the terracotta and briquettes. Wouldn't it be more important to keep the enchiladas or soup warm instead of those insipid appetizers?

I think keeping them warm would make them even more difficult to eat. Of course, I envision an appetizer being something one could pick up and eat with one's hands, so maybe that's the problem.

[JennyMama]

Nice to know her dinnerware was from Mexican artisans and not, say, Deruta, Italy

[GothicGirltx]

Nice to know her dinnerware was from Mexican artisans and not, say, Deruta, Italy

PWNED!!!!

[cheekybones]

OMGosh!!! I work with several who were born in Mexico and have the great joy of being treated to authentic Mexican food on a regular basis. I was only partially watching this (as I usually do) but had to stop and give this carnage my full attention. I wept. The taco de carne asada I had for lunch was so good. Slop's stuff, not so much (I expect).

[bizook]

- You know how we refer to the backstage assistants as "Millies". I have a new nickname - can anyone tell me what an "Audrey" is? (Jeeeebus that thang was huuuuuge!)

- The semi-homemaker's dish looked like a damn spoogefest (12). Nice of SLop to lighten up on the booze (only one likoor in today's drink - pineapple tequila -- WTF??) in honor of her pregnant guest. Real sensitive, that.

[irisheyes]

I might actually eat the semi-homemaker's recipe. If you bought a rotissere chicken and shredded it, it would be really good. (I'd probably cut the recipe in half and use flour tortillas, but that's just cause I despise corn tortillas.)

Everything else? I wouldn't serve that crap to my worst enemy.

[KCMOCook]

I have a new nickname - can anyone tell me what an "Audrey" is?

The Venus Flytrap from "Little Shop of Horrors?"

[tardigrade]

Stupid, stupid, stupid idea about the terracotta and briquettes. Wouldn't it be more important to keep the enchiladas or soup warm instead of those insipid appetizers?

Aside from the obvious dangers (pottery shattering from the heat? I know Alton Brown's used terracotta pots for barbecuing, but doesn't he just use the pot for a cover?) she should warn the Fandras that doing this indoors can cause problems with carbon monoxide. Gives a new meaning to "food to die for".

[bizook]

The Venus Flytrap from "Little Shop of Horrors?"

Winner Winner, pre-chunked chicken dinner !!!

(An "Audrey" is the humungo flower arrangement which sits to the left of SLop's sink)

[orchidgal]

I'm pretty sure that the Audry II would say, "Don't feed me, Seymour," if this food were the offering.

[Jadzia81]

Aside from the obvious dangers (pottery shattering from the heat? I know Alton Brown's used terracotta pots for barbecuing, but doesn't he just use the pot for a cover?)

I kinda zoned out at the tablescape so I don't exactly recall how she suggested setting this thing up, but terracotta is pretty sturdy and should be able to take the heat from some charcoal pretty easily. It's thermal shock that could be a problem, so I wouldn't stick glowing hot briquettes into a very cold pot, but that's about it.

[KCMOCook]

So that theory is sorta, kinda like putting hot food INto a cold slow cooker?

ETA: Speaking of, I put hot food into a cold CrockPot the other day and I'm still here...along with the rest of the universe.

Edited by KCMOCook, Feb 21, 2009 @ 10:55 PM.

[sendtoscott]

I like open, festering sores on my dessert, don't you? I'll resist the urge to ask if they look like any open sores on any part of her anatomy, because I'm a gentleman.

[tamerakitten]

Didn't she say in her magazine, that Miracle Gro was on the list of her favorite products?

Well- when you add water to Miracle Grow powder it does take on that lovely tidy-bowl blue color she seems to LLLLLove for her 'tini's.

just sayin'.......

[ceilismom]

Kind of like gunshot wounds on a CSI cadaver or something.

That is exactly what I thought. When I said as much to my husband, he turned green and left the room.