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11-5: "Discount Dinner" 2008.08.23


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#31

pinkasu2

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Posted Aug 24, 2008 @ 7:32 PM

Well, hers is a professional throat, doncha know.


Roflmao!

#32

tabbygirl521

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Posted Aug 25, 2008 @ 12:55 PM

I can't even snark anymore. I was so pissed off at this "money-saving" episode that I had to go out and find an all-you-can-drink bar.

If only there were a way to demand she show a breakdown of cost for this crap. And who but some out-of-touch fool would use shredded "money" to decorate for this theme? **scream**

I suppose she means that you save money as opposed to going out to eat the Four Seasons, or having your personal chef serve you caviar or something.

Oh, and be sure to use whatever you have on hand. Don't go out and buy any of that "fancy stuff."

#33

tabloidlover

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Posted Aug 25, 2008 @ 5:15 PM

Oh, and be sure to use whatever you have on hand. Don't go out and buy any of that "fancy stuff."


Like mayonnaise?

#34

whywatch

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Posted Aug 25, 2008 @ 7:12 PM

This was more annoying than usual. It wasn't even comical to me. First we had frugal in the same sentence with brie and then decadent in the same sentence with oatmeal. Also, she is just sooo pleased with herself. I didn't make it past the decadent oatmeal bars. I didn't think I was strong enough to handle the dollar martini and tablescape.

#35

mushypeas

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Posted Aug 25, 2008 @ 7:45 PM

And would someone please send Sandy an urgent e-mail telling her what the word decadent means.


I think she gets confused. OK, we know she gets confused. To Simple Sandy, decadent means that they're so super, f'ntastically delicious that you can only eat a teeny, tiny piece. And when Simple Sandy "tested" her recipe on her witless friends, family, and production crew, barely any of the oatmeal bars were eaten. Va-Lah, decadence!

And who but some out-of-touch fool would use shredded "money" to decorate for this theme? **scream**


She probably christened the idea during a Divorce-scape, when she informed Wallet that the marriage was ending.

Edited by mushypeas, Aug 25, 2008 @ 7:49 PM.


#36

Dakki

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Posted Aug 26, 2008 @ 3:04 AM

I'm imagining a YouTube video of Jeff screaming "Leave Sandy alone!!" a la Chris Crocker.

#37

Divaah46

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Posted Aug 26, 2008 @ 12:02 PM

Whoever that Jeff guy was, I hope he never gets good service at a predominatly gay establishment again. He was an embarassment to the unisexual community. As for SandyPants, I don't think she really wants to delve into "frugal" cooking because that would go back to her horrible days along the cherry/onion/daffodill fields of her youth.

#38

JTMacc99

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Posted Aug 26, 2008 @ 12:56 PM

First we had frugal in the same sentence with brie

My dad get's Brie at the farmer's market for $2.99/lb. It's not the stuff you would get in a quality cheese store, but it is exactly the same stuff I can get in my supermarket. Interestingly, it ends up being the cheapest cheese I would ever consider eating, so maybe Sandy's on to something. Hell, even Ameican cheese costs twice that.

#39

ChristineLynne

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Posted Aug 26, 2008 @ 12:58 PM

Like mayonnaise?

You know, I just realized the most painful irony. Most of us actually do have eggs, oil, mustard, and vinegar on hand all the time. With a blender it's really quite easy to make your own mayo, but of course, Sandra would never consider such a thing - it requires simple, high quality ingredients and a modicum of technique.

#40

volcano

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Posted Aug 26, 2008 @ 4:10 PM

My dad gets Brie at the farmer's market for $2.99/lb.

I would doubt that Sandy has ever set foot in a farmer's market. Too many frush ingreedients. Eating real fruits and vegetables is so much WORK!

#41

whywatch

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Posted Aug 26, 2008 @ 4:41 PM

My dad gets Brie at the farmer's market for $2.99/lb.


Perhaps if she had mentioned at how reasonably priced it could be found, it wouldn't have been so jarring.

#42

tabbygirl521

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Posted Aug 26, 2008 @ 7:03 PM

the cherry/onion/daffodill fields

Don't forget the "beautiful blackberry field" she once alluded to. As I'm sure I ranted at the time, any such thing here in Western Washington is sure to be an out-of-control explosion of brambles, probably hiding a rusted-out mobile home and some dead cars. It's like our State Scourge. Our kudzu, if you will.

I also cannot get over the cocktail. 1, 2, or 3 cups of vodka. Based on those HUGE servings, I'm estimating those were triples. Sandy's comment: "I can see I'm gonna hafta make another pitcher!"

Yay, alcoholism! (And I wonder why I'm spending so much time in the Intervention thread lately.)

#43

rosiehawthorne

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Posted Aug 26, 2008 @ 8:38 PM

Bitch had a "Vallah" and and "Wallah" within minutes. I've heard the "wallah" all the time. This is the first I've hear a "Vallah".

#44

jcbrown

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Posted Aug 26, 2008 @ 9:56 PM

With a blender it's really quite easy to make your own mayo, but of course, Sandra would never consider such a thing - it requires simple, high quality ingredients and a modicum of technique.

I would doubt that Sandy has ever set foot in a farmer's market. Too many frush ingreedients. Eating real fruits and vegetables is so much WORK!


Monkey business, all of it. No seasoning packets anywhere!

Edited by jcbrown, Aug 26, 2008 @ 9:56 PM.


#45

Stephres

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Posted Aug 27, 2008 @ 7:44 AM

Did anyone catch the bumpers? One the first one, she told us her "dollar martini" was coming up. The next one, she said just wait for her "one minute martini" and lastly it was just a martini. I was laughing my ass off.

Some other observations:

I am much more likely to have mayonnaise on hand rather than plain yogurt.

Fabric remnants are 1) not big enough to be a table cloth; and 2) not $1, so stop lying Sandy. I've had enough of it.

Those were big honking martini glasses! I call bs on it being a $1 martini: what cheap vodka was she using?

The quesadillas looked like the only thing I would actually eat, maybe because they were made by her new bff.

#46

ChristineLynne

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Posted Aug 27, 2008 @ 1:37 PM

Did anyone catch the bumpers? One the first one, she told us her "dollar martini" was coming up. The next one, she said just wait for her "one minute martini" and lastly it was just a martini. I was laughing my ass off.

Thanks, I thought I was losing my mind. I remembered her saying "one minute martini" at some point, but then it was all "dollar" martini. I remember thinking that a real martini is a one minute martini - ice, splash of vermouth, pour in gin, shake, strain, add olive. Of course, it isn't as one poster said, "alcohol with training wheels" - i.e., an attempt to hide vodka in sweet stuff in an effort to get hammered as quickly as possible. So not Aunt Sandy's forte.

#47

awshucks

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Posted Jun 20, 2009 @ 1:42 PM

She said we could use anything cherry flavoured for the rib glaze. Oh really? Can I use cough syrup? Can I melt my chapstick and use that?

When she was getting the ingredients out of the fridge for the potato salad, she said she needed "mint and flask parsley." Someone's got boozing on her mind (as usual)!

After all her preaching about washing hands after cutting halapeeeeno peppers, I didn't see her even go close to the sink.

Oh, and when she was pouring the vodka into the pitcher, the sound of the pouring started a couple of seconds before the actual pouring started. Wake up, foley artist! Did Aunt Sandy slip you a dollar martini and knock you out?

Edited by awshucks, Jun 20, 2009 @ 1:42 PM.


#48

stixx23

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Posted Jun 20, 2009 @ 11:12 PM

Foley artist also screwed up on the plating of the ribs as you could hear knife-on-metal-pan sounds even while the ribs were going on the platter with said knife.

We, too, heard the "flask parsley" and saw her eyes light up at the thought.

Funny watching this airing now in light of her "conversion" to money saving meals. The dipping sauce alone cost at least $3 and apparently only serves two.

I co0uldn't understand the dollar martini v. minute martini either. Does she charge her johns, uh customers, a dollar a minute?

#49

vera charles

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Posted Jan 16, 2010 @ 12:07 PM

How did I not see this episode before today? Somehow I've missed the previous airings, so it was like a brand new semi-homemade for me. Was this the pilot episode for Money Saving Meals?

Who is this Jeffrey and why were they dressed alike? And why was she wearing a maternity nightgown?

"Caramel colored raisins?" WTF? That's what she calls regular raisins? I was on the phone with my mother right afterward -- she thought maybe Snads meant golden raisins. But, no, they were the regular dark raisins in the red box. How bizarre.

The semi-homemaker tips are really getting lame. Is there anyone on Earth who doesn't know that bit about spraying the measuring cup with Pam so the honey/molasses/peanut butter slides out easier? Well, anyone except Sandy?

Those were some nasty looking ribs. And the quesidillas looked like a greasy, slimy mess. Just what I expect from semi-homemade!

#50

Philly Phoodie

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Posted Jan 16, 2010 @ 4:01 PM

"Caramel colored raisins?" WTF? That's what she calls regular raisins? I was on the phone with my mother right afterward -- she thought maybe Snads meant golden raisins. But, no, they were the regular dark raisins in the red box. How bizarre.

It drives me insane that she couldn't even call them sultanas or golden raisins. What a waste of skin she is sometimes. You'd expect someone with their own fricking cooking show to know these things. A shame really. I guess if I open up the right bottle of Cracker Jacks I too can get a prize giving me my own cooking show....

#51

vera charles

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Posted Jan 16, 2010 @ 4:07 PM

It drives me insane that she couldn't even call them sultanas or golden raisins.

But they weren't sultanas or golden raisins. They were plain old dark brown raisins in the red SunMaid box. Maybe it's like the time she was talking about adult spinach in relation to baby spinach? She just has to have some name for the regular stuff. Because just saying raisins or spinach is not enough for her?

#52

Kevind85

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Posted Jan 16, 2010 @ 5:26 PM

This is one of my personal favorites. Watching Sandy and Jeff was like watching two drunk sorority girls film a cooking show parody for Youtube.

Jeff's amazement and Sandy covering the bowl was priceless "You don't wanna see my microwave" Anything to make Sandy look smarter

The faux Martini that had a name change every other segment,it was a dollar martini then it was a minute martini.

Sandy not wanting to wash her hands "If you touch it then you have to wash your hands" and then Earth would go hurling into the sun if that happened.

I laughed at her not having any mayonnaise but yet she has 3 packs of ribs, and Brie.

All in all a classic in my eyes.

#53

ragstoriches

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Posted Jul 27, 2011 @ 10:48 AM

Today Sandy is showing me how I can make an entire super simple, sodalicious meal with stuff in my very own pantry, without having to go to the regular groshry store to buy all that fancy new stuff! Except I only have some of those ingredients in my very own pantry. How do I get the others? I suppose I could go to the regular groshry store and buy them, but Sandy said I didn't need to do that because they're all in my pantry. But they're not. So what do I do? Maybe if I wait long enough, they'll magically appear in my pantry?

Seriously, I don't get the concept of this show. Making meals from stuff in your pantry and refrigerator...isn't that what people normally do anyway? Does she think people normally go to the grocery store every time they want to cook something? Plus, some of that stuff she used wasn't all that cheap. Note to SLop: If it's in your pantry or refrigerator, most likely you had to buy it at some point.

I see Sandy had her drinking buddy on the show today. All you can drink for $12? Want to bet the place had to cart SLop out afterwards and dump her into a waiting cab?

Ribs and cherry pie filling? GAG! Does the woman even think before she makes substitute suggestions?

"This is gonna be out of control when it's done!" What?

Why did SLop suddenly hurry over to the microwave and sing out an opera note?

When one has knife skills like Sandy does, one should never look away from what one is doing while chopping. I really expected her to cut her fingers off when she looked up at the camera while hacking away.

Hip check count: 2.

If Sandy really used every ingredient in her pantry for the oatmeal bars (which resembled kitty litter when they were in the pan), apparently she doesn't keep much in there (or did she mean she used every ingredient that wasn't booze?). Funny how everything she did have in there was just what she needed for this russapee. If I tried to make oatmeal bars using everything in my pantry, I would wind up making a monstrosity way worse than anything even Sandy could have dreamed up. Oh, and I keep my eggs in the refrigerator, not the pantry. I find they stay fresh longer that way. (Will Sandy mention me on the show if I were to send in this super-genius Semi-Ho trick?)

That semen cocktail was missing something...oh yes, the choking hazard. Did you mean to leave that out, SLop, or is the booze getting to your brain more than usual? Thanks to Sandy filling the glasses up nearly to the top, I fully expected one of them to spill some of it.

Dear Aunt Sandy: I just llllloved your cheap tablescape that you featured on this show, but I thought up a way to save even MORE money, and that is not doing a tablescape at all! Aren't I the smartest thing on the block?

Edited by ragstoriches, Jul 28, 2011 @ 11:13 AM.


#54

Kathcart

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Posted Jul 28, 2011 @ 11:59 AM

it's like the time she was talking about adult spinach in relation to baby spinach


Did she really? Because I would pay money to see that! That is the worst (which is to say, BEST) remark ever!!!

#55

vera charles

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Posted Jul 29, 2011 @ 6:30 AM

For more on adult spinach, see the Cabin Fever thread.

Edited by vera charles, Jul 29, 2011 @ 9:10 AM.


#56

SnarklePuss

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Posted Feb 29, 2012 @ 1:49 PM

I just caught this one for the first time today. Uncle Jeffy had a wedding band on his right hand, implying that he has a SO. Wonder what he thinks of Jeffy being Sandy's BFF?

The only "party favor" she should be giving her guests is a gift certificate to a liver specialist.