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11-01: "Drive-In" 2008.04.05


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#1

anneofcleves

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Posted Apr 5, 2008 @ 9:08 AM

Drive-In

Sandra creates a semi-homemade Drive-In inspired menu! Get rolling with Mini Corn Dogs with Sweet and Spicy Relish. Then, pull up to a delicious Drive-In Walnut Burger with Grilled Sweet Potato Chili Cheese Fries. To wash it all down, a spiked Orange Smoothie and for dessert a Root Beer Float Sundae!


Run Away!!!

#2

cissyboo

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Posted Apr 5, 2008 @ 9:33 AM

The food was boring, and the smoothie was disgusting. But the tablescrape-she was soooo proud of how everything was disposable!!

#3

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Posted Apr 5, 2008 @ 9:35 AM

I found the snap apart place settings.

$12 a pop. That's quite a Semi-Ho savings. Especially since you just throw them away.

#4

anneofcleves

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Posted Apr 5, 2008 @ 9:36 AM

The walnut burgers looked fine; therefore there is no way she came up with this recipe.

Chili Cheese Fries. A wonderful food when prepared by a good diner. And no self-respecting diner isgonna use canned chili. It is interesting how she emphasized she was using an all-meat chili - to serve with veggie burgers. {/GONG}

Did you know C’lleen had never had avocado on a burger before she met Sandy? Amazing.

The tablescape. Good Lord, she’s blathering about how cute the “snap out” place settings are! Simple Sandy has apparently never seen how plastic items are manufactured, and how the manufacturer is simply selling them fresh out of the press without having to spend the labor to finish the process. Kind of like clothing manufacturers selling clothing with unfinished hems. $12 apiece? What a dummy.

One good thing happened while I was at FN.com looking at the recipes…For some inexplicable reason known only to the web monkies at FN, Sandy’s recipes triggered the “More Recipes Like This” to pull some divine-sounding Spinach Enchiladas courtesy of Emeril.

Edited by anneofcleves, Apr 5, 2008 @ 9:37 AM.


#5

abbottrabbit

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Posted Apr 5, 2008 @ 9:36 AM

You know she totally put out at that drive-thru in college, right?

The secondary theme of this episode is apparently "whatever you like will be perfect." She's said that about the chili about seventeen times, and now she says it about the cheese. Not everything that everyone likes will be perfect. This is why half of even the legitimate reviews on her FN page say things like "I made the chili cheese fries, but I used my favorite chunky beef stew instead of chili and hashbrowns instead of potato wedges, and it was not so good."

Oh well. I suppose I should just be grateful she doesn't say "It will be perfection," which is one of my biggest pet peeves about her.

Continuity! Culleen and her ridiculous ignorance about avuh-CAHAAAAH-does on a CHEEEEEEEZ-burger crops up again!

Edited by abbottrabbit, Apr 5, 2008 @ 9:38 AM.


#6

Jeaux35

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Posted Apr 5, 2008 @ 9:37 AM

Oh, Joy! The return of C'leen. Although she never shows up, but is referenced repeatedly,

Did anyone else think that when she said “And what is a trip to the drive-in without”, that she was going to say a cocktail? She said dessert, but you know she was thinking of her cocktail.

I can't smack on her for the corndogs, as they are a guilty pleasure of mine. But I do have to say that who would have EVER thought of using the super-secret ingredients of onion power and garlic powder? Damn, that is brilliant! But would it have killed her to use corn meal instead of a box? Multiple references to “melk”. Drink!

The spicy ketchup was ok, if you like that kind of thing. But damn, somebody needs to teach this idiot some knife skills. And again with being able to “see” flavor. Drink! C'leen. Drink!

Chili cheese fries. Seasoned fries. Drink! Seasoning packet. Drink! Pre-greased grill. Drink! Cooking frozen fries on a grill. Barf! Canned chili. Drink and barf! “Pre-shredded” cheese. Drink!

Walnut “burgers”. Why? They would be as dry as a bone. Why not a hamburger? Aig. Drink!

I suppose if you wanted a vegetarian burger these would be ok, since their a drive-in's recipe, but I certainly would not take vegetarian cooking advice from this idiot. I'd wanted someone to report back as to the edibility of these "burgers".

Root beer float. Actually, this looked really, really good. But then she fucked it up with Cool Whip. Drink!

Orange Smoothie. Vanilla pudding mix. Drink! Melk. Drink! If you didn't guzzle this thing, wouldn't the pudding mix start to set up?

Tablescrape. All disposable or plastic. Just like our Simple Sandy. Plastic and disposable.

Edited by Jeaux35, Apr 5, 2008 @ 9:44 AM.


#7

BklynEater

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Posted Apr 5, 2008 @ 9:37 AM

I call bullshit on those walnut burgers. First, she claimed that these were a standard item at that drive in when she was in college. Sure .... Everybody knows how those college kids love their walnut burgers.

Then there were the ones she made. They looked like dry tasteless meatballs. She attempted to shape the first one, a fat ugly thing that was breaking apart as she put it on the grill. And then something magical happened. It instantly turned into a much flatter perfectly formed patty as the camera pulled away.

But there was still more magic to come. Later when she took the burgers off the grill they had mysteriously morphed into standard fat patties again. We live in an age of miracles.

BTW, no way were the finished burgers what came off the grill (they actually looked good) made from walnuts. Those were ringers, made from beef and nicely browned.

Her shows have more special effects than the "Matrix."

#8

rosiehawthorne

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Posted Apr 5, 2008 @ 9:42 AM

But there was still more magic to come. Later when she took the burgers off the grill they had mysteriously morphed into standard fat patties again. We live in an age of miracles.


BklynEater, those "burgers" must be like that "zebra" rotisserie chicken she made. You know - the one that plumps up in the oven. In this case, the walnuts plump up on the grill.

#9

cissyboo

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Posted Apr 5, 2008 @ 9:51 AM

BTW, no way were the finished burgers what came off the grill (they actually looked good) made from walnuts. Those were ringers, made from beef and nicely browned.

I thought they also were the wrong color. The things on the grill were orange, and the finished product was burger colored.

#10

LucyInSpain

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Posted Apr 5, 2008 @ 9:54 AM

I hate to defend the crackpot even a lil' bit, but according to local history, walnut burgers are a Wisconsin invention that are manufactured in LaCrosse: http://www.onmilwauk...anutburger.html

That said, I have several recipes for veggie burgers made with chickpeas, nuts, and/or seeds, and they ALL call for at least 2 or as many as 4 tablespoons of olive oil. 1 tablespoon would probably result in, as others have pointed out, one dry hockey puck.

Canned chili doused in packaged seasoning? That's wrong on so many levels.

"We used to come here before finals, after finals..." Pfft. I wonder how many she actually passed.

#11

transitfan

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Posted Apr 5, 2008 @ 10:13 AM

"We used to come here before finals, after finals..." Pfft. I wonder how many she actually passed.


During finals, instead of finals...

#12

nolamom

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Posted Apr 5, 2008 @ 10:25 AM

About the hard root beer candies " Ima gonna wanna break these up." I had to rewind to get it right. Ima gonna wanna -- Wow, that's all I can say.

#13

homecookinggirl

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Posted Apr 5, 2008 @ 10:35 AM

Time line alert!

She says she had the walnut burgers while in college. The article states that the were invented in a hotel in 1986. She was in college for only 3 years and should have enrolled in 1984. She was out of Lacrosse by 1987, before the burgers even had a chance to be out in the public. Who is she trying to fool?


BTW, what was with the opening with the sweet potato chilli cheese fries and then using just ore ida seasoned fries in the demo. We all know she has inconsistencies in her 41 years story arc, but you think they could at least get it right in just 22 minutes of filming.

Edited by homecookinggirl, Apr 5, 2008 @ 10:37 AM.


#14

mmecorday

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Posted Apr 5, 2008 @ 11:10 AM

A smoothie made from frozen orange juice concentrate, vanilla pudding mix, orange cream yogurt, milk, vanilla flavored vodka and orange flavored liqueur? She's kidding, right? She's such a kidder! Oh, and don't forget the ice (which I actually heard rattling around in the cooler this time).

And I guess ketchup is OK for Colleen, but not so for little boys and little girls.

Why all the field trips this season? All the sudden she thinks she's Samantha Brown.

#15

Loey

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Posted Apr 5, 2008 @ 11:37 AM

avuh-CAHAAAAH-doe on a WAAAALLLLnut-burger !

Aww, it just doesn't have the same ring to it.

#16

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Posted Apr 5, 2008 @ 11:47 AM

I caught the mention of sweet taters early in the show. After that, it seemed like they were regular taters.

Also, she said she pre-greased her grill to medium high. Wow, she's good.

#17

fxtech

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Posted Apr 5, 2008 @ 12:22 PM

The Mysterious and Magical "Sandy the Semi-ho". She's a friggin' magician with all her tricks and effects. I bet when snads is done taping Semi-Homade for the FN this season, she'll open a show at Ballys in Vegas. Her act will be 70% semi-original, 30% Cirque du Soleil, but with out all the monkey business.

Can she tell you, it's the best ever. ugh...

#18

bizook

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Posted Apr 5, 2008 @ 12:46 PM

"We used to come here before finals, after finals..." Pfft. I wonder how many she actually passed.

During finals, instead of finals...

"Finals" is clearly code for "bar crawling". She's such a kidder.

So SLoP ripped off the Walnut Burger from Rudy's who ripped it off from someone else?

"The Historic Trempealeau Hotel Walnut Burger - A seasoned walnut and cheese patty with lettuce, tomato, pickle and honey mustard on a whole wheat kaiser bun. $4.25"

What? No ahhhh-vo-cahhhhdo? Losers.

Pictures are up!

#19

toolazy

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Posted Apr 5, 2008 @ 1:13 PM

On the Rudy's menu it says that the walnut burger is new.

#20

bizook

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Posted Apr 5, 2008 @ 1:36 PM

Moved to Speculation

Edited by bizook, Apr 5, 2008 @ 1:56 PM.


#21

gor666

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Posted Apr 5, 2008 @ 2:47 PM

Okay,I can buy that she can "cook" at the beach,at the lake,in a vineyard(the Wedding one),at the fair,at the backyard pool,at a race track,by a Maypole....but in the parking lot of a drive-in restaurant!?!? The whole time I'm watching this I'm thinking "Man,I'd rather just order something from Rudy's instead of that crap she's making!".Literally.

Why does she have the sherpas drag a whole stove set-up outdoors (four weeks in a row),and not bring a damn refrigerator?This 'magical cooler' schtick is getting harder and harder to swallow...just like her food.And why bring a damn stove and just turn it up to 'warm',since I've never seen any smoke,steam,or even radiated air coming off those stoves,but magically we have grill marks and root beer syrup...That's one trick I'd like to know the secret to.

If she went to college in the 80's,why does she seem to mostly make food stuffs that harken more to the 50's?This is like the the fourth retro-like show I've seen that seems to be about two decades off from the theme of the day.Does get her arrusspies from 'The Joy of Cooking' circa 1957?

Her shows have more special effects than the "Matrix."


There is no brain.

#22

Divaah46

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Posted Apr 5, 2008 @ 2:53 PM

Why didn't the owner of Rudy's come out after SandyPants made this crap and chase her off with a shotgun? This is a huge disservice to the establishment. You would think in the same month as Earth Day, she would learn not to be so damn wasteful.

#23

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Posted Apr 5, 2008 @ 3:48 PM

Well, all I can say is this episode did not save the FN time or money. The airfare and accommodations for Snads and the crew, paying for the use of Rudy's parking lot for a day or more, and all those rented vintage cars. And probably a future defamation lawsuit from Rudy's.

#24

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Posted Apr 5, 2008 @ 5:23 PM

Damn... girl got the memo after last episode about the bad extensions and goofy hair, at least.

I caught the mention of sweet taters early in the show. After that, it seemed like they were regular taters.


Yep.... in the intro, and right before the actual fry segment, as she mentioned the recipe, she said "sweet potato". I was waiting for her to explain that they were not really "sweet potatoes", but more like "potatoes" that are "sweet!" But nope, she just jumped right in to the "chili cheese fries" recipe. That had already salty "seasoned" potatoes with more salt from the seasoning packet. Eeek.

The corn dogs didn't look too bad, but I have to think that the ratio of "corn" to "dog" using the mini dogs would be overpowering.

WTH was with the "S" on the table behind her?

"It's important that you beat your aig first...." and Sands trails off. Any REAL cooking show host would usually then explain WHY that instruction is so important. Did she just forget, or was her explanation so horrible they just cut it completely and couldn't even say it with a voice over?

And right to the commercial with Sands! In the Thanksgiving stunt kitchen! Oh Sandy... take note... whoever filmed that without a Vaseline smeared lense actually did you favors. Yeah, you could see all the sun spots and maybe a few wrinkles, but you actually looked somewhat human. (Although maybe I should keep my mouth shut, a real lense would do NO favors to how your food looks when you're done with it.)

Was she using the "tenderize" side of a meat mallet to smash the root beer candy? It sure looked like she was making holes in that bag. Yum, nothing like some small bits of plastic in your ice cream sundae....

And that's no spiked orange smooth. That was a Hacked Orange Whip.

Pictures are up!


Oh good golly. In what upcoming ep are we going to be able to get the full viewing of Sands in her St. Pauly Girl costume?

#25

frequent viewer

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Posted Apr 5, 2008 @ 5:40 PM

It's been ages since she's eaten anything she's cooked, but she positively grossed me out when she bit into the corndog and made the orgasmic face and sounds.

#26

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Posted Apr 5, 2008 @ 6:59 PM

Oh good golly. In what upcoming ep are we going to be able to get the full viewing of Sands in her St. Pauly Girl costume?


She seems to be at another fair? Is this a new theme, or is she officially a carnie now? I can just see it: her new bio will include stories of how she was born in the wagon of a travelin' show, and Vicki used to dance for the money they'd throw.

#27

Teawaddle Hill

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Posted Apr 5, 2008 @ 10:27 PM

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Edited by Teawaddle Hill, Jan 2, 2012 @ 4:50 AM.


#28

tabloidlover

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Posted Apr 5, 2008 @ 10:30 PM

I just have a question about the "yummy" relish she made to go with the korn-dogs. OY.... Anyway - I don't believe I have ever seen korn-dogs served with pickled peppers before. Soooo, if I got it correctly, we are supposed to purchase two types of pickled peppers (sweet and hot) and mix those with ketchup?? I really don't get it...

And her krafty krap-scape was red-overkill today! Wow - so much red!! And Snatchy could at least pop out the plastic ware for her guests - tres tacky!

I was completely grossed out by her root-beer sundae - who reduces soda AND adds sugar to it??? The orange whip kocktail... no words.... except, maybe vomitous.

#29

gor666

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Posted Apr 5, 2008 @ 10:44 PM

And right to the commercial with Sands! In the Thanksgiving stunt kitchen! Oh Sandy... take note... whoever filmed that without a Vaseline smeared lense actually did you favors.

Unfortunately,I have to agree.She seems to look a lot better in commercials than her own friggin' show...maybe it's time to change producers or something.

It's been ages since she's eaten anything she's cooked, but she positively grossed me out when she bit into the corndog and made the orgasmic face and sounds.

Yeah,that lil corndog did linger a bit on her lips during that taste test of it...maybe she was thinking of 'Joshy'.

Now,where the hell is that mind bleach at?...

#30

Teawaddle Hill

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Posted Apr 5, 2008 @ 11:03 PM

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Edited by Teawaddle Hill, Jan 2, 2012 @ 4:50 AM.