88 replies to this topic

[AVorlon]

So, let me get this straight. Two snipers with completely different motivations decide independently to shoot Delko and Marisol, and do it at the exact same time, from the exact same apartment building, and using the same exact model of rifle? This has gone beyond fantasy and into the realm of the absurd.

Whatever happened to Ho’s wedding and someone “having a clear shot” at him?

Gloria with her unnaturally colored contact lenses somehow managed to be even more annoying than the SOJ’s, if that can even be possible.

[meredithand]

Ok, since I pretty much missed the whole show because of Grey's, can anyone provide a really quick recap? Pretty please?

[Lillywhite]

Is it wrong that I thought this was the most hilarious episode ever?

Most ridiculous scene of the night: ooooh, so many to choose from. So, so many. How about the one where the ambulance drives off and there's Horatio, out in the clear open, about to take down the Mala Noche without so much as a bullet vest? And he does, actually, take them all down, despite the fact that they all have guns and should be able to take him down because, you know, he's right fucking there!

And it wasn't like the car was blocking the ambulance, anyway. The ambulance was still able to drive around it! So why did Horatio have to get off? Why was the doctor saying that did more damage than the bullet? The ambulance didn't stop for 5 seconds. Whatever... just, whatever. That scene should win the episode a Montgomery Burns Award for Outstanding Achievement in the Field of Bullshit.

We were promised so much emotion from David Caruso and yet got... nothing. Nada. Not a frown. Not a sad face. Not a tear. Just his regular ole mug face. Maybe the wrinkles prevent him from showing emotion? Whatever. Ann Donahue can kiss my ass. Or is she too busy kissing Caruso's? My God, he totally blows as an actor. Terrible, just crap all around.

Runner-up of the night:

Delko: [on the phone] Yes, doctor.
Caruso: Is that the hospital?
Delko: No, it was the deli down the street. Butcher. He's not a real doctor, but he gets to wear a nice shiny coat like they do.

Marisol is still such a fucking selfish bitch. She calls Horatio when something goes wrong, but only calls her brother when she can't find Horatio. And what the hell, she couldn't find Horatio? She only let the phone ring 3 times! And then she calls Eric from the hospital... to tell him she wants to see Horatio. She doesn't want to see her brother? She doesn't want to see her family? Her dog? If I were Eric I would've punched Horatio in the face.

So Marisol flatlines, and no one runs into the room to try and revive her? Not a nurse? Not a doctor? Not even a candy striper? She just... dies? And if she was in critical condition, why wasn't she in the ICU? They were trying to keep her a live with a... nasal cannula? What hospital is this?

On the other hand, Adam Rodriguez was awesome. He's come such a long way since the pilot. The anger totally got to me. I think my favorite scene was when he found out. His phone began to ring and when he picked it up, his fingers were actually shaking because he probably knew what it was. Awesome. And then he waited like 10 seconds to say hello. That was great. Kudos to Adam. They should take Caruso down and make him lead.

So Delko and Calleigh are only allowed to interact in every penultimate episode? I liked their last scene together, but all she could manage to say was, "I'm so sorry?" Come on, Calleigh, at least put your hand on his arm, or his stomach, or his... what? Um.

Delko's psycho girlfriend was hilarious. She scored major points with me for vandalizing Boa Vista's car. By the way, what IS IT with Boa Vista's shirts? How old is she? Cause even my grandma was like, "oh my God, that shirt is so grandma-ish." And she just keeps getting more orange. I keep waiting to hear her last boss was Willie Wonka.

Overall, totally hilarious. I can always count on this show for a great laugh.

Edited by Lillywhite, May 15, 2006 @ 11:25 PM.

[asweet7492]

I agree, this was a hilarious episode. Did anybody else see the "heroic pose" Caruso struck getting out of the ambulance at the beginning, or was it just me? And you know somebody is hitting the self-tanner a wee bit too much (Eva LaRue, hi) when my mother (who pays no attention to things like that) asks, "Who's the oompa loompa? And is it shallow of me to admit to wanting to hug Delko after he found out Marisol had died?

[Merreh]

We were promised so much emotion from David Caruso and yet got... nothing. Nada. Not a frown. Not a sad face. Not a tear. Just his regular ole mug face. Maybe the wrinkles prevent him from showing emotion? Whatever. Ann Donahue can kiss my ass. Or is she too busy kissing Caruso's? My God, he totally blows as an actor. Terrible, just crap all around.

Not true! Not true! I swear, I saw ONE OTHER EMOTION. I was looking for it the whole time, and I SWEAR I saw one somewhere. Can't quite remember where though.

I agree, this episode was quite hilarious. Horatio and Eric, the vigilantes.

I have to say, the part where Horatio shot that Mala Noche laying on the ground made me snort.

On the other hand, Adam Rodriguez was awesome. He's come such a long way since the pilot. The anger totally got to me. I think my favorite scene was when he found out. His phone began to ring and when he picked it up, his fingers were actually shaking because he probably knew what it was. Awesome. And then he waited like 10 seconds to say hello. That was great. Kudos to Adam. They should take Caruso down and make him lead.

I did agree with this. He impressed me tonight, and i've never really been impressed by him before. Of course, maybe being on a show where your main competition for acting skills is DC is actually a blessing in disguise.

Edited by Merreh, May 15, 2006 @ 11:20 PM.

[Thundercat]

Oh man, this episode was high comedy even on the singular bell curve that CSI:Miami exists on.

Marisol's death scene was ridiculous. I thought her parents were supposed to be at the hospital! No, H is spewing non sequitors about dinner and she closes her eyes and he instantly knows she's dead, releasing her limp hand after a mere nanosecond.

Wolfe leading the charge of SWAT officers at the Mala Noche universal meeting was.... WTF? Ryan, get the hell out of the way and let the fine officers do their job!

I guess Horatio wasn't real clear in his instructions to Marisol's police guard. I suppose the guard thought he wasn't supposed "to let her out of his sight" only at the restaurant since that was the one and only scene we saw him in.

Couldn't believe Marisol's frantic phone call to Eric advising that she can't find Horatio after allowing H's phone to ring only a couple times.

So are we supposed to assume that Horatio is letting Memmo go (after going to all the trouble of driving him out to the sticks to threaten him) to deliver his message to Antonio that he is a dead man for ordering the hit on Marisol?

[rimfire]

I particularly like the shot of Horatio staring off into whatever, with Eric just to the side and behind...and they held it for, like, 5 minutes. You're right, Lillywhite, this was the most hysterical episode yet.

Loved how Marisol managed to hang on for Horatio to come to the hospital, but had the grace to die ON CUE after "Ne...ver."

Now, wasn't DC supposed to have some big love scene he was working out for? What's he going to do now? Jump in bed with some chippy on the rebound?

No more clues on the mole front, although bringing back Valera looks suspicious to me...

[VNutt]

"Don't ever leave me"

"Never"

..... unless I have to go kill a few inept gang dudes and stand around for a few minutes to look triumphantly at my accomplishment. And then stand around the crime scene. And then ask obvious questions back at the lab. But then I'll be right there. You'll understand, right??? I'll make it up to you later baby, a nice dinner and some dancing and .... uhhh. Oh. Nevermind.


God. HoCaine reminds me of a segment on MST3K with some Kathy Ireland movie where they tried to guess her emotions from stills.... "Dull surprise. Dull surprise. Dull surprise? Dull surprise. Dull surprise. Dull surprise?? Dull surprise. Dull surprise."

Edited by VNutt, May 16, 2006 @ 12:08 AM.

[christhejester]

I think we almost got another emotion: call me crazy, but I think HoCaine might've actually been choked up for a third of a half of a second there at Mar-ree-sole's bedside at the end. Might've just been having a facial spasm or something, too. Who knows?

Was it just me, or did they light Mar-ree-sole's death sequence oddly? It's like, in one shot she looked halfway healthy; then in the next, she was pale! as! death!

Also, ITA, Lillywhite: where in the hell was the medical staff? Why wasn't she in ICU hooked up to a dozen machines? Where were the alarms when she flatlined? Why in the hell did Horatio just sit there and let her die? Why...

...don't I turn my brain off now. It hurts if I actually think about this show too long.

Er. Anyway, it's no wonder crazy!bitch mistook Eric for Mar-ree-sole's husband, though, considering Eric showed her, y'know, affection while HoCaine showed her...uh, basically nothing. (Just loved that first hospital scene, where HoCaine blows in and out without really acknowledging and/or touching her, while Eric took a second to at least squeeze her hand.)

This ep straddled the line bewteen so-bad-it's-hysterical to downright unwatchable. Between the asinine crazy!bitch plot, the utter lack of chemistry/spark/life between HoCaine and Mar-ree-sole, HoCaine striking his HoPose after (handily) disPosing the two Mala Noche goons, HoCaine so easily disposing the goons, Ho & Eric being trusted alone with the guy that probably killed Mar-ree-sole (however awesome that scene was...), it was hard to know where to begin.

Awesome.

[SaraDi]

This show is ridiculous. Even my mother, who watches every single soap opera and lives off of episodes of Doc dubbed in French, was laughing the whole time.

About Boa Vista: "Why is she so orange? And what's with the shirt?" - Mom

Then ...
Mom - "Why's that lady in the hospital?"
Me - "She has cancer."
Mom - "... really?"

I was very excited to see Manny from General Hospital on the show. It's nice to see that as a bad guy, he doesn't catch a break anywhere.

They should have had Ho Jr. stay in the suit and tie the whole ep, because seriously? That was hot.

edited because opera has an 'a' at the end. Who knew?

Edited by SaraDi, May 16, 2006 @ 12:31 AM.

[CareBear080787]

Wow. Ok, I watch this show like once in a blue moon. I used to watch it more often... but then it began to REALLY suck. And wow. This sucked so hard it was like a vacuum.

Ah... Marisol, the worst plot line to hit any CSI ever. So glad that she's gone. Mar-ee-sol and HoCaine was just... weird. I am ashamed to say that both my sister and mother continue to watch and ENJOY this show. I'm thinking about demanding DNA tests to prove that they are, in fact, related to me.

But. I still love Adam Rodriguez. Maybe that's just because he was on Roswell.

[bitterlawyer]

First time poster--please be kind. My DVR didn't record the last 20 minutes of the show due to the Presidential address. I got as far as Ryan and Horatio discussing the Universal on Star Island. What happened next? Thanks.

[Wyldemusick]

The pain, ohhhh the pain. This could have been a hell of an episode but, sheesh, bad writing, bad acting, bad bad bad.

I swear after Caruso shoots the guy on the ground and the ambulance takes off, he's looking at the scene as though considering whether to shoot the guys again just to be sure.

I am not unhappy to see the last of Aerosol. Total character waste there.

So is Eric the one who takes the bullet for the team? Means Ausiellio was off in his spoilage...unless Calleigh takes one for the team next week.

Edited by Wyldemusick, May 16, 2006 @ 1:24 AM.

[AVorlon]

Man, is this Mala Noche one bunch of inept fools. They have a “universal” meeting without bodyguards or a perimeter established, so that the Miami police can just conveniently storm right into thier boardroom without so much as a warning for any of them, as they all sit around contentedly puffing on cigars. Actually, it’s the writers who are the fools, for making this so unbelievable that people find it funny.

At least the writers are entertaining us, if not in the way they intended.

Edited by AVorlon, May 16, 2006 @ 1:47 AM.

[hollerinwoman]

was very excited to see Manny from General Hospital on the show.

He must have felt right at home on this show, then. That Aerosol dying scene was right out of As the World Turns. From 1969.

Seriously, it took me some time to figure out if she just fell asleep due to the meds, or if she had really checked out. I tried looking at Ho's face for some kind of response. *snort* What am I, crazy? No help there. And poor Eric, when he shows up to see her body and he just stands there looking kind of lost, what does Ho say?

"I am SO sorry, Eric, I loved her more than life itself, and I know you did, too. Take some time off, come back when you're ready."

HE DOES NOT!

"Eric, you get the shooter, I'll get the driver!" proclaims Ho the Invincible, and he stalks out of the hospital room, leaving Eric to mourn the tatters of his wasted life.

This show is a serious addiction. I need some help, quick.

[TinyC]

They should take Caruso down and make him lead.

Word. Eric's such a better character than HoCaine anyway.

I have yet to see the ep but I'm glad I came here before. That way I won't choke while laughing.

[RandomWatcher]

What got me was that for most of the episode Marisol looked as healthy as a horse, but then in that last scene she was in, she looked as pale as a ghost.

By the way, in the previews for next Monday, who were the four in the box as the announcer was talking about the mole?

[brstp]

"Fight, Mari. Fight."

"What's that?"
"It's a contact lens."

"You're not planning to stand me up, are you?"
DEATH, and no doctors are running in to check on their patient that just redlined it.

I also love how the Mala Noche safe house had ZERO guards to alert the heads of the organization if anything approached, and obviously Delko trying to act is always hilarious.

Edited by brstp, May 16, 2006 @ 3:55 AM.

[TinyC]

Man, I'm watching it right now but I've got to write down my thoughts cuz I'm afraid I'll forget some things...

Could HoCaine look less scared in the ambulance? I mean, his new wife has been shot and all, and there NOT one freaking emotion on his face. That's acting people!

Could these two newlyweds look any more uncomfortable?

Oh Jesus. This is getting better.

Awww and HoCaine arrives and saves the day! [hmmm, courtroom]

Marisoooool. I got it now! HoCaine was the cure to her cancer! He's the cure to everything!

The sister/wife thing is hilarious.

They didn't check what the SUSPECT was saying? Oh my, we've got some winners in the Miami PD.

And No bullets in this world can hit HoCaine. That's magic!

There are couches and plants in ICU rooms? Oh man, the set decorator is just so bad.

Of course, they don't need to try to revive her, cuz you know, then they might actually succeed.

HoCaine is like the best boss. I mean, he follows procedure like no other, doesn't background check suspects, lets a killer go away just for the sake of a good line.

What a joke. Are these writers also writing for the other two CSI shows? Coz then, I might have to start worrying.

Edited by TinyC, May 16, 2006 @ 6:40 AM.

[TnMom]

How could this show be so bad when the original CSI is so good?

I think Eric and Calleigh are the only reasons I even watch this show. DC is horrible. Can he even give his new wife a quick kiss?? I'm not asking for anything passionate, but when he left her sitting there, most husbands would have leaned over and kissed her. At least he did say, "I love you".

I think this was one of the worst episodes ever. It was all over the place!! The timeline just messed with my head. I thought this was the day of the wedding and now they've been married for a little while??

The stalker story was pathetic...it was so out of the blue (and I was spoiled - knew it was coming).

Oh well... What's sad is this could have really been a good episode.

Please, get some new writers!!

[Taylor Ann]

I think this was one of the worst episodes ever. It was all over the place!! The timeline just messed with my head. I thought this was the day of the wedding and now they've been married for a little while??

At least they didn't let her get pregnant! I'm thankful for that - maybe AD wanted that but was overruled by the rest of the cast? Thankfully I might add...

[TinyC]

How could this show be so bad when the original CSI is so good?

Not to mention when the third one is so good too...

[TnMom]

I'm sure CSI:NY is good, too...I just never could work that one into my tv schedule. :lol I do like the 2 main characters!! :)

[lvmom]

I have been desperately trying to figure out if DC said 'I look old give me a young hot wife' or 'I need an emmy and some background angst to act convincingly next season. I do tortured cop well, write me in a young hot bride you can kill off.' I know it never seemed like Horatio was into the marriage. I guess he had a premonition that she would be killed off before she could steal his thunder.

[MostLikelyNever]

Has anyone ever seen Horatio and Marisol kiss? I know I haven't. They had the weirdest relationship ever. I mean, he leaves her at the restaurant and no kiss goodbye? She dies and he doesn't even give her a kiss goodbye on the forehead? The writers really go out of their way to make Horatio seem asexual.

Edited by MostLikelyNever, May 16, 2006 @ 7:32 AM.

[Taylor Ann]

My only guess is that Horatio is a guy wo carries his feelings inward (or inwardly???).
But did you see him kiss or hug with Rebecca or that attorney that got killed for that matter?
I think the showrunners want to avoid any love-scenes or one that come close to it at any costs.

[Lev7]

About Ho not kissing Marisol. It was strange, like he was about to but she kind had a slight grimace on her face. Maybe she told him she couldn't have any physical contact until she was healthy.


Speaking of which, when did Marisol die? I saw her in the hospital, but I missed her death scene. Perhaps I slipped into unconciousness for a few seconds.

[orangeslice]

Funniest moment in the episodes for me

(Ho Caine leaving Marisol at table, akward movement with head cocked to side)
I love you (walking away)
M:(looking up but not at him or in his general direction) I love you too.

The Univeral with no bodyguards, no alarms, no boobytraps, nothing.

Crazy stalker lady with everything in the world but Delko, (was it that good)

There is actually to much to mention, but these made me laugh the hardest.

Edited by orangeslice, May 16, 2006 @ 9:11 AM.

[noahsotherwife]

Holy fuck, that was the most fabulously craptastic episode ever. I was on the verge of pissing myself from start to finish!

Mar-eee-soooohl went from the healthiest looking cancer patient to the healthiest looking corpse. My brother and I acted out her death scene before it even happened. You could see it coming a mile away with the whole dinner conversation.

Poor Valera. The orangeness has appeared to rubbed off on her too. She was looking as bad as Boa Vista.

Calleigh was so annoying and terrible acting on Emily Procter's point. She's been getting more and more wooden, but last night was horrendous.

The whole Gloria plot came out of the blue. If she's been harassing Delko's women for months, shouldn't we have heard about her prior to this episode? I was hoping she was going to be the woman that Delko had sex with in the alley, since the writers seem so fond of digging up old characters and storylines.

I love the Mala Noche. I root for them, just like I root for Stetler.

What was up with Ho calling Tripp Francis? Frank should have punched him for being a dick.

David Caruso's acting was horrendous as usual. Absolutely no chemistry between Ho and Maa-reee-soohl. I have a hard time believing that he even noticed that she died, since David Caruso seems incapable of expressing any emotion other than smugness. I have to admit, DC and Adam Rodriguez's attempts at looking pissed off and out for vengeance were hysterical.

If next week's episode is anything like last night's, I cannot wait.

[applepie77]

Overall, totally hilarious. I can always count on this show for a great laugh.

Word. If I had never seen this before, I would have sworn Eric was Marisol's wife, not HoCaine. Wife near death? "she's in good hands" and goes off to get the Mala Noche. Never touches his wife? Pluhease.

Worst death on tv ever. Totally unbelievable. HoCaine and Delko in Marisol's room after her death? Deciding on going to get the bad guys right away? Pluhease. No tears, no emotion. Nada.

Did like Eric's psycho girlfriend though. She was pretty entertaining. And what was with the whole courtroom-shooting thing at the beginning? Totally unbelievable.

Why do I watch this show? I guess I needed a good pick me up of laughter, as I did a rewatch of the last West Wing on Bravo (sniff, sniff) and then got all riled up with Jack Bauer on "24".