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Perfectly Cromulent Quotes Embiggen the Soul


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#1

JTMacc99

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Posted Mar 10, 2006 @ 9:12 AM

Got a Simpsons quote of some sort going through your head today? Maybe you ran into a situation that was exactly like something that happened to Lenny? Can't share it with the people around you because they won't appreciate on as many levels as you do? You're not alone brothers and sisters! Share your perfectly cromulent stories here; we'll understand.


ETA: Marge, look at me! We've been apart for a day, and I'm as dirty as a Frenchman. In a couple more hours I'll be dead.

Edited by JTMacc99, Mar 10, 2006 @ 9:13 AM.

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#2

mtlchickie

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Posted Mar 10, 2006 @ 9:42 AM

"I am so smart. So very, very smart. S-m-r-t...I mean S-m-a-r-r-t."

For the days I feel like a total boob.

Edited by mtlchickie, Mar 10, 2006 @ 9:42 AM.

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#3

FfrauleinN

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Posted Mar 10, 2006 @ 9:45 AM

"Iron helps us play!"

Not sure which one of Flanders' kids said it, but I know it always cracks me up when I think of it.
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#4

Genius

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Posted Mar 10, 2006 @ 10:35 AM

Two Homer faves:

"They have the internet on computers now?" And when considering buying a matter-transporter: "Naah...it only transports matter."

Edited by Genius, Mar 10, 2006 @ 10:37 AM.

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#5

Lead Magnet

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Posted Mar 10, 2006 @ 10:54 AM

"It makes no difference who you vote for... either way your planet is doooooomed!!!!!" Plus the follow-up "Don't blame me, I voted for Kodos."

I'm not sure if it's a bad sign that most of my friends have no problem with the usage of "cromulent" in semi-normal conversation. One co-worker uses the "S-m-r-t" quote fairly often also.

Edited by Lead Magnet, Mar 10, 2006 @ 10:56 AM.

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#6

CantThinkUpName

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Posted Mar 10, 2006 @ 11:08 AM

While watching Jon Stewart on Larry King a few week ago all I could think of was.

Hollis: I see you got a case of Jebeditis.
Lisa: Just as I was getting over my Chester A. Arthritis.
Hollis: You had Arthritis?
Lisa *uncomfortable/quiet voice*: no...
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#7

dustie

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Posted Mar 10, 2006 @ 11:11 AM

Dear Marge,

Welcome to Splitsville. Population: you.

PS I am gay

My favourite!
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#8

beadgirl

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Posted Mar 10, 2006 @ 1:13 PM

"or-re-GAH-no? the hell?"

I say that line out loud every time I encounter oregano in the supermarket, a recipe, a menu, anywhere.
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#9

countbessie

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Posted Mar 10, 2006 @ 1:17 PM

Ha. I do the same, whenever I use it to cook. Similarly, whenever I see a carton of milk I can't help but to imagine it with a label that says "now with vitamin R"
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#10

Nflux Forever

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Posted Mar 10, 2006 @ 1:30 PM

Everytime I'm in a store (usually in Best Buy at the TV Shows DVD section) and I'm debating whether or not I should purchase something, I always hear Flanders saying to me "Simpson, I order you to buy those shoes!"
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#11

rustyspigot

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Posted Mar 10, 2006 @ 2:21 PM

Everytime I feed my fish....

"Why did I have the bowl, Bart? Why did I have the bowl?"

on a different note I use this quote and meld it to fit any situation by replacing the word "vest"

"He's like a riddle wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a vest."

Edited by rustyspigot, Mar 10, 2006 @ 7:54 PM.

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#12

blackwing

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Posted Mar 10, 2006 @ 2:25 PM

I'm particularly fond of:

"Kids, you tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is, 'never try'."
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#13

IdesOfSmarch

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Posted Mar 10, 2006 @ 2:40 PM

I always think of Apu's rant to Principal Skinner re: "Billy and the Cloneasaurus" whenever someone says something stupid to me...which is far too often.

Apu: Oh, you have got to be kidding sir. First you think of an idea that has already been done. Then you give it a title that nobody could possibly like. Didn't you think this through...[later]...was on the bestseller list for eighteen months! Every magazine cover had...[later]...most popular movies of all time, sir! What were you thinking?! I mean, thank you, come again.
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#14

countbessie

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Posted Mar 10, 2006 @ 2:42 PM

"Trying is the first step toward failure." My personal favorite Simpsons quote . . . I quoted in my highschool yearbook as well, even though the school didn't appreciate it

I love yelling "This is why I can't have nice things!" whenever I or somebody else breaks something
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#15

AgentX

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Posted Mar 10, 2006 @ 2:43 PM

"Kids, you tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is, 'never try'."

I love that quote blackwing.

Lately I can't watch the trailer for "V for Vendetta" without saying "Vendetta! Vendetta!" like Bob's baby did in the episode where The Simpsons went to Italy.

"'But reckless spending and interracial homoeroticism were just volume one of the encyclopedia self-destructica" is a good one too, but much harder to use in real life.
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#16

emma675

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Posted Mar 10, 2006 @ 2:54 PM

My favorite will always be Homer's "Think unsexy thoughts, think unsexy thoughts! Stupid, sexy Flanders!".
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#17

DeeJayEnki

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Posted Mar 10, 2006 @ 3:04 PM

"Trying is the first step toward failure."


Such a classic.

I'm a huge fan of Moe's line, "So...you guys are Eurotrash, huh? How's that workin' out for ya?"
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#18

AgentX

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Posted Mar 10, 2006 @ 3:09 PM

Homer: "Life is just one crushing blow after another until you just wish Flanders was dead."

Will Homer's well of optimism ever run dry?

If we can include just single words, "Boourns" and "Craptacular" have become part of my vocabulary. I don't even think they are odd to say anymore, to me they are perfectly cromulent words.
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#19

blurry

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Posted Mar 10, 2006 @ 3:20 PM

Homer: Yeah, Moe, that team sure did suck last night. They just plain sucked! I've seen teams suck before, but they were the suckiest bunch of sucks that ever sucked.
Marge: Homer! Watch your mouth!
Homer: Aw, I gotta go. My damn weiner kids are listening.
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#20

AimingforYoko

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Posted Mar 10, 2006 @ 3:30 PM

One I use all the time:

" Why must you turn my office into a house of lies?"
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#21

tothemax

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Posted Mar 10, 2006 @ 4:13 PM

People never ever get my "Perfectly Cromulent" t-shirt. I can't tell you how disappointed I am.
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#22

DeeJayEnki

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Posted Mar 10, 2006 @ 4:14 PM

Every time I ever see any debate about gun control, I have to throw this one in:

"Hey, ya yutz! Guns aren't toys. They're for home protection, hunting dangerous or delicious animals, and keeping the King of England out of your face."
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#23

ecaron

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Posted Mar 10, 2006 @ 4:19 PM

Lately I can't watch the trailer for "V for Vendetta" without saying "Vendetta! Vendetta!" like Bob's baby did in the episode where The Simpsons went to Italy.


Me too! My brother started doing it and now it's stuck in my head.

One of my all-time favorite Homer quotes, that's been on repeat for a few days:

Plant psychiatrist: You hate your father, don't you?

Homer: Yeah, but the guy I really hate is your father.

Plant psychiatrist: I...shouldn't have said anything, I was just venting.


ETA: I just remembered the best Simpsons quotage ever, by one of my cousins. Once we were all out at my grandfather's, and as I was driving away, my cousin yelled after me 'Put it in H!'. Fortunately I didn't hear him, because I probably would have driven into something and still have been laughing.

My brother's been staying with me for a while, and whenever I'm ragging on him about something, he'll shake his head and throw out 'Rawr rawr, no one understands you, She Bear!'

Edited by ecaron, Mar 10, 2006 @ 4:34 PM.

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#24

Cass4

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Posted Mar 10, 2006 @ 4:31 PM

Unfortunately Iíve never been able to work either of my 2 favorite quotes into a conversation:
"Replace the word accidentally with repeatedly and the word dog with son"
and
"I am familiar with the works of Pablo Neruda"
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#25

meredithkb

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Posted Mar 10, 2006 @ 4:38 PM

Homer: Yeah, Moe, that team sure did suck last night. They just plain sucked! I've seen teams suck before, but they were the suckiest bunch of sucks that ever sucked.
Marge: Homer! Watch your mouth!
Homer: Aw, I gotta go. My damn weiner kids are listening.


Bart & Lisa: We're not weiners!
Homer: Yeah, then why are you dressed like that?

My husband and I have this conversation at least once a month.
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#26

dutchsofa

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Posted Mar 10, 2006 @ 7:28 PM

Any time somebody orders a salad, I have to bite my tongue...

"You don't make friends with salad! You don't make friends with salad!"
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#27

Queen Jac

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Posted Mar 10, 2006 @ 10:49 PM

A good Homer quote

Marge! It takes two to lie. One to lie and one to listen!
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#28

AgentX

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Posted Mar 10, 2006 @ 10:53 PM

Marge! It takes two to lie. One to lie and one to listen!

Heh! Love that one, also love: "I'm not going to lie to you Marge. Goodbye."
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#29

countbessie

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Posted Mar 10, 2006 @ 10:55 PM

"It's uter-us, not uter-you."

Heee. Also, "you shot who in the what now?" comes in handy whenever somebody says something incomprehensible to me
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#30

AimingforYoko

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Posted Mar 10, 2006 @ 11:04 PM

"I can't live the button-down life like you. I want it all! The terrifying lows, the dizzying highs, the creamy middles! Sure, I might offend a few of the blue-noses with my cocky stride and musky odors. Oh, I'll never be the darling of the so-called 'City Fathers' who cluck their tongues, stroke their beards, and talk about 'What's to be done with this Homer Simpson?' "

Best. Homer rant. Ever.
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