But she explicitly stated that her reason for opposing the move was her insecurity about Jim not keeping her as his sole focus, not that he hadn't consulted her about the initial decision. - Col Bat Guano
This is why, in my post in the Finale thread, I talked about how left-footed A.A.R.M. and the Finale were. They spent a whole season building this interesting tension that was clearly in part about Jim's failure to include her in the decision, and then turned it into, "Pam's just insecure" at the last second. It not only does Pam's perspective a great disservice; it also negates Jim/Pam's narrative this entire season. But it's quite clear, up until the end of Paper Airplane, that Pam resented not having a choice.
While Jim might not have been happy with Pam being away, he was still encouraging about her pursuing her dream. Pam was never encouraging about Athlead. She always acted as if it was an imposition that she shouldn't have to suffer through. Again, this is a failure in the writing. By establishing that Jim chose to join Athlead without discussing with her, her attitude was negative from the start. Why not have her start out in favor of the idea, but then gradually turn against it because the strain it was causing her and Jim's changing attitude? Her opposing the move from the start placed her in the role of villian that really made her unsympathetic.
Right. But this precisely why we can't really compare Jim's earlier support to Pam's lack thereof this season. If you start out so differently - if you start out steamrolling your partner into big life changes - how much can you blame her for not warming to the idea? I remember when Pam told Jim about Pratt at the end of the fourth season, she was a little tentative - waiting to see if he liked the idea. Of course, he was proud. But it makes a huge difference to know that your partner is asking for your support rather than demanding it. It's hard for us to presume that Pam might've acted the same way had Jim taken the time (initially) to communicate why Athlead/p meant so much to him, and why it was a good choice for the family. Running a covert startup behind your wife's back for weeks and then springing changes on her once it's out in the open is just terrible behavior. I'm confused as to why we forgive Jim's egregious behavior, and then crucify Pam for reacting to that behavior like any normal spouse might.
There has to be more than a single job opening in Philadelphia. This couldn't possibly be considered her only option.
Well, it's the only one we saw. So, either it was representative of the types of jobs she could expect to have, or it really was the only opening. And either way: A step back.
I don't see how this doesn't support what I'm saying. Jim thinks a change of scenery is a good thing as long as Pam is in his life. He's proved that time and time again. So why is it crazy speculation to say that if Pam had some fancy job opportunity--remembering that one of the foundations of their relationship is that Jim has always encouraged her to explore these opportunities--Jim would be able to embrace the change of scenery with Pam? Jim considers getting away from DM a good thing. He is bothered by the fact that he's been there that long. - Sister Magpie
Jim has never had to change his scenery for Pam since he got with Pam. All his changes of scenery have been about Pam, not for her and certainly not with her. So it is absolutely speculative to say that because he supported her dream when there were no stakes in it for him, he would certainly support it after having built an entire life with her in Scranton. I mean, harkening back to Halloween (Season 2, Episode 5), Pam also encouraged Jim to go for another job. Stakes are just different when you're friends and even when you're dating. Every adventure seems like a good adventure before kids and a mortgage. The real test comes after you've settled in. And we've just never had a chance to see Jim give up his stasis for Pam's dream. So, never having seen it, we are of course being speculative.
Seems to me the show gives us Pam's pov plenty of times.Jim gets plenty of eps where he's made to look bad. Pam was the one on camera tearfully asking if Jim was changing and what else she was supposed to do, with Brian sympathizing. Pam got her way. Jim himself defended her pov. I value Jim's pov more because Pam crossed the line into scary awful.
I think, by the ninth season, it's too little too late with regards to showing Pam's perspective. We've been rooting for Jim since Season 1. And maybe in Season 3 we veered off to show Pam's point of view (not accidentally the only season where Jenna receives an Emmy nom), but subsequently we went right back to their relationship being primarily seen through Jim's eyes. If you do that long enough, the audience is trained to care about one character more than the other, and is primed to ignore the balance of perspectives even in an argument where both perspectives are shown.
I honestly can't imagine a story where Pam gets some dream job doing art and Jim's response is to get resentful and say she has to choose between him or the job where Jim isn't considered a villain.
Isn't this just rewriting history? Pam never said, "It's me or the job." Their reconciliation in Paper Airplane was built on her running to give Jim his umbrella even though she resented that he'd be leaving - with their marriage in the lurch - once again. At what point did Pam issue an ultimatum? Letting Jim know that she's unhappy is not equivalent to telling him it's her way or the highway. Or do you think telling your spouse that you're unhappy is wrong and Pam should've kept her mouth shut and her feelings bottled up? Is silence the mark of a successful marriage?
As for imagining a story where Pam gets a dream job, I can certainly see Jim having issues if Pam handled it as callously as Jim handled their transition with Athlead/p. As in, "Hey husband, I've been workin' on a startup for weeks now and didn't tell you. Surprise! Also, I'm investing a lot of our money into this. Surprise! Also, I'm moving to Philly for most of the week. Surprise! Good luck with Cece's rash."
Edited by still proudgirl, May 21, 2013 @ 1:13 PM.