This is a thread to discuss advice dispensed on (scripted) TV shows. Usually well-meaning, they can be either pearls of wisdom that might actually inspire viewers, or big honkers that don't make any sense in real life.

It's no surprised that some of the worst bits of TV advice ever came from 7th Heaven.
1. "Be harmless, not helpful."
This is bullshit because the family hardly ever followed this and were, on the contrary, quite harmful. Were the Camdens being harmless when they sent Mary to Buffalo? Were they harmless when they sent Simon off to college early instead of actually dealing with the fact that he killed someone? It also seems contradictory considering that Reverend Camden and later Lucy are in professions specifically charged with helping people.
2. "Choose your feelings."
They repeated this over and over, but it just doesn't work. We can't choose our feelings. That's why they are "feelings" and not "thinkings." We can choose how to act on those feelings, but not the feelings themselves. Telling people that they can choose what to feel is just going to make them feel bad for not having the "right" feelings and repress something that needs to be dealt with.

This leads me to my favorite piece of advice. In the Simpsons season 1 episode "Moaning Lisa," Lisa has a bad case of the blues and nobody knows what to do about it. Marge remembers what her mother told her at that age. While dropping Lisa off at band practice, Marge tells her to just smile and "push your bad feelings down, all the way down, past your knees until you're almost walking on them." But when Lisa follows Marge's directions and is subsequently taken advantage of by her classmates and band director, Marge pulls her back into the car and finally says the right thing. "Lisa, I take it all back! If you want to be sad, honey, be sad! We'll ride it out with you! And when you are through being sad, we'll still be here. From now on, I'll do the smiling for both of us." At this, Lisa gives a genuine smile. All she needed was to know that her feelings are valid and she has the support of her family. I was a lot like Lisa growing up, a little girl who was emotionally maturing and had a lot of worries, and this scene was exactly what I needed.

From Homer Simpson:

"When a woman says nothing is wrong, that means something is wrong. And when she says that something is wrong, that means everything is wrong. And when she says something's not funny, you'd better not laugh your ass off!"

Three useful phrases (also from Homer Simpson)
"Great idea Boss!"
"Cover for me!"
"It was like that when I got here!"

Whaa? It's telling us to act apathetically, instead of trying to make people's lives better? This... Does not fit in with my preconceived notions about 7th Heaven. Except the ones like "It's stupid," and "It wouldn't actually be much help to anybody." Although that last one is because I thought the show would be far too idealistic and far removed from reality for people to identify with it, whereas that advice sounds closer to the cynicism side of things.

GeoBQn, your Simpsons advice reminds me of these two from Daria's episode The Misery Chick.


Although if I were to list all the bad advice handed out in Daria, I'd be here all night. There were a lot of stupid people on that show, and most of them liked to hand out lots of advice.

It's especially weird in light of RevCam's multiple times saying something like "Evil triumphs when good men do nothing."

I'm reminded of an episode on Leave It to Beaver. Beaver saw a car by the house and inside was two guys with masks. He called the cops. It turned out that the guys were his brother Wally's friends, ready for a masquerade party. The lesson was that Beaver did the wrong thing and was told he should have investigated before calling the cops. What?! That's just stupid and dangerous.

Speaking as a woman, this is either the best advice ever given in the history of mankind, or the worst.

From CHEERS character Dr. Frasier Crane:

BEST ADVICE: ''Sam (Woody, Rebecca, Carla, Cliff, Norm), you've got to tell the truth.''
WORST ADVICE: ''Sam (Woody, Rebecca, Carla, Cliff, Norm), you've got to tell the truth.''

Homer also has his bit that whenever a woman comes back from a salon appointment, you should always fawn over how great she looks no matter how little she appears to have actually changed.

Actually, his wife had better advice (and one of my favorite lines ever) when they visited Nantucket, to Helen on Wings:
"You know, it is permissible to have an unexpressed thought."

As a mom, I'm teaching my three boys that same concept. I remind them frequently that girls like it when you notice that they've done something different to their appearance. I have to because apparently their dad never got that memo. Hopefully it will come in handy once they get to the age where they're interested in what makes girls happy.

In line with advice on how to deal with women, Hank had some advice for Bobby on how to deal when women "go down Aisle 8A":

Hank: Bobby, every woman has a period . . . of time, every month--
Bobby: Even mom?
Hank: Bobby, if we're going to get through this, you cannot ask me questions like that.
Bobby: Sorry.
Hank: Now, women have this time where they get angry at everything. And usually, men are the everything. It's like a tire fire, trying to put it out just makes it worse. You've just got to let it burn. Grab a beer, and let it burn.