As viewers, we watch shows and sometimes have to beat our heads against the wall at some of the boneheaded decisions made by the writers or producers or directors or even the networks. ("The most popular actor on the show AND the lead have left the show? That doesn't matter! The show must go on!") Here is the thread for complaints about them and their mistakes and rules that such showrunners should be forced to follow.

For example, if an ensemble show has more than seven regulars, it better have a damn good reason. More than seven and not only is the extra character or characters usually underdeveloped, the extra character(s) take screentime away from other characters who would normally have more screentime, making them underdeveloped as well. For example, a show with nine regulars might only have five well-rounded characters; a show with ten regular characters will be lucky to have four.

And that is just for shows with an emphasis on characterizations; for shows like procedurals or most half hour comedies that have an emphasis on plot and individual storylines, the magic number is much lower, like four or five.

The notable exception to this rule would probably be Lost, where there are about fourteen regulars. The thing is, each episode only focuses on one character. One half of the show deals with that character's backstory and only involves two or three guest stars. In the other half, that character really only significantly interacts with about five or six other people on the island, thus fufilling both rules albeit in a very roundabout way. The only major problem they run into is not rotating the characters enough, overusing Kate and not seeing enough Claire, for example.



So, what are some rules that every show should adhere to? And what are some notable exceptions, shows that break these rules and still work?

I was going to make the thread title 8 Simple Rules for Running a TV Show, but I have a feeling that there are more than eight rules!

Good thread idea. I guess my rule would be NEVER make any character pregnant. I mean if the actress actually gets pregnant that's unavoidable but I think pregnancy, all the stuff involved with pregnancy and the baby just alienates viewers that haven't advanced to that stage of their lives. My guess is that writers are so consumed with pregnancy/baby stuff in their own lives that they have to express that onto their tv shows.

Best Show Runner: The producers of Star Trek TNG. There's proabably a lot of people who would disagree and I'm sure there's a ton of inconsistencies I haven't noticed but for me this was how a show should be run. It never had a definite JTS moment and I enjoyed all the episodes throughly.

Worst Show Runner: I'm sure he's not the worst ever but my vote goes to Josh Schwartz of The OC. He's just running that show to the ground. The recycling of plotlines is a joke and completley unacceptable for a professional that is paid to do this. I wish some prominent critic would call him on this.

Similar to Isiah Thomas adding another high paid big name player, Josh just prefers to cram in another love interest instead of creating good storylines.

To make sure you are able to write most shows that are popular you must smoke crack. Also some shows have had more then 7 regulars explain Homicide life on the street. It had Lt. Al "Gee" Giardello, Detective Frank Pembleton, Detective Tim Bayliss, Detective Stanley Bolander , Detective John Munch , Detective Meldrick Lewis , Detective Steve Crosetti, Detective Kay Howard , and Detective Beau Felton. Thi sis from the first season so do not mention Detective Paul Falsone

Speaking of pregnancy, I always find it reprehensible when shows try and cover up an actress' real-life pregnancy. It's way too obvious most of the time, and the producers often resort to writing the character out of the show, or to a bare minimum, to avoid addressing it. It's done almost every time though, with one notable exception that I hope will become a rule: when Debra Messing got knocked up during Will & Grace. There were a few fat jokes, but the costumers made no attempt to really mask her belly aside from putting her in floaty shirts--which eventually didn't hide a thing. And, in my opinion, it didn't matter. She was pregnant...so what? Chandler gained weight, but they didn't put him behind a ginormous box like they did Claire Huxtable.

If your show is a comedy/sitcom you should avoid doing "serious" episodes. On "Fresh Prince of Bel-Air" they had an episode where Will got shot and Carlton decided to get a gun for protection.

I mean what are they, mugging for a Nobel Peace Prize?! Make me laugh!

Kudos to Seinfield for never resorting to this, that show never took itself too seriously. Heck even when Susan died they never wilted.

I'll see you actor(s), Morrigan8472, and raise you writers/producers. Most people here know I have a fanatic hatred of John Wells. When Aaron Sorkin left The West Wing, the show should've been allowed a dignified death. Instead, they brought in that piece of shit hack and look what happened. Ditto goes for his destroying Third Watch as well as ER.

Avoid bringing in characters that destroy the show's chemistry and pisses off the fanbase. I mean even if you think the character has something to contribute is it really worth all the grief that you put your fanbase through?

Some characters that come to mind: Connor (Angel), Dawn (Buffy), Oliver (The OC), Kenny (Frasier).

Dammit, I hate it when sitcoms pull that shit.

As a rule, it would be nice if writers/producers didn't play favorites with the cast of an ensemble show; thereby alienating most of their audience and driving them to madness. AlMiles, are you reading this?

Treat the viewers as intelligent beings. Sure, some of them might be idiots, but you can cater to them while still being smart.

When a fan does not like something that you do, do not condescend to him/her by saying "you don't get it" or "you might not want to see it, but you need to see it." If viewers complain about what you're doing, accept it as a failure on your part to convey whatever it is that you wanted convey to those viewers.

You might complain that viewers have the attention spat of a gnat, but if you're going to try their patience, you should really try to fill the filler with, you know, something entertaining. Also, there's only so much jerking around that you can get away with before we drop the show.

Consistency. Look, we all know it's TV. You can't get it 100% real all the time. That's fine. We get it. HOWEVER, do at least make an effort to make things flow properly. Also, if you present a few essential elements on your show, it is unacceptable for you to go back on it and break the very rules that you have set up for yourself. Fanwanking is hard work that leaves the viewer distracted and chips away at his/her confidence in your show.

Your show has an expiration date. If Walker, Texas Ranger had to end, then you too have to call it quits when your show is done. Have the sense to end a show with dignity.

I hate when shows give themselves titles that just set up snarky headlines. Everybody Loves Raymond? Not me, har, har (not me, though, really, really hate that guy). I want my copyman to have to work at being clever; don't just give it to him.

Fit devices to your directors that deliver painful but harmless electric shocks whenever they include a musical montage in an episode. This negative conditioning will allow the occasional montage when appropriate but still prevent overuse. However, use of Leonard Cohen's "Hallelujah" should trigger lethal voltages.

-Kids grow old. That cute little 8 year old boy is suddenly going to be towering over his parents in a few seasons. Likewise, the adorable girl you hired to be the sweet, moral center of the show isn't going to fit that role when she hits 14 or so.

-Remember, high school lasts 4 years. College lasts roughly 4 years, unless all of your cast becomes music majors or teachers. Just because they looked like they could pass for high schoolers when they were 25 doesn't mean they will pass as freshmen in college when they are 30.

-No dreams. Ever. Unless they involve cheese.

-Your "nerd" characters cannot look like they belong on the cover of Maxim if they just parted their hair the right way and wore the right clothes. They also do not listen Top 40 pop music, they listen to M83 and Dream Theather. I know that kills product placement financing, but it's at least more accurate.

Amen. To this day I maintain that there never should have been a woman regular on The A-Team, and yet they kept replacing the actresses as they moved on. Oh, and the first one broke another rule, the Stupid Name Rule: her name was Amy Amanda Allen and they sometimes called her "Triple A". Get away from me.

Consistency of a character's personality. Ever since Luke (Gilmore Girls) found out he had a daughter, he has been unrecognizable. Downright despicable. I may not like the way some of the characters on Grey's Anatomy behave sometimes (or some of the choices they make), but at least they don't go totally against (or out the realm of possibility) for their character.

Great thread.

1. Realize that the viewers are quite intelligent and dont dumb down scenes or issues.

2. Soapies take note - kids age per year. If we, the viewers see a five year old child today, this means we will take note when said child is 21 next week.

3. Enough with the complicated and unecessary incest and love triangles.

4. Dont try to shove a certain character down our throat by giving them the best lines and constant adulation from the rest of the characters. I'm sorry but I refuse to believe that Tori Spelling as Donna Martin is a gorgeous piece of ass. Likewise I cant fathom how Jennie Garth as Kelly Taylor is the only woman in Beverly Hills, hence everything from rapes, fires, stalkers etc happening to her.

5. Soapies take note again - you know that famous shot where a character is just about to impart a vital piece of information while everyone awaits breathlessly? Then said character stares into the distance and the scene cuts off till tomorrow?
Yeah that one.
Unecessary, trite and more overdone than Pamela Anderson's body.

****oooowhee this is fun, back with more****

Fundamentally altering the premise of a show.

Example:

1. ER turning from a medical drama into a melodramatic soap opera.

2. L&O: SVU turning from a police procedural into a melodramatic soap opera.

3. Angel turning from Angel's quest for redemption into, yep, a melodramatic soap opera.



And if you do goof, don't try to weasel out of the responsibility by insulting your fans. Calling me an obsessed loon because I happen to have a reasonably good memory does not make me want to keep watching your show.

Another suggestion: If your cast includes young women, have a back up plan in place to deal with any potential pregnancies. Do not wait until the middle of the season to come up with a half-assed demonic pregnancy plot to explain why your leading lady is pregnant.

Have somebody on staff whose job it is to write down and keep track of all facts about location, backstory, characters, and events that have been established. Your fans will certainly notice and remember that a particular life-changing event took place last November once you have said so; if characters now celebrate the anniversary of that event in January, it makes you look stupid and uncaring. If your show is any good, your fans will remember stuff; you need to remember it at least as well.

Laira writes:


Not to nitpick, because I agree with your point, but wouldn't that be a change in tone and story emphasis rather than a change in premise?

ER has always been about emergency-department personnel and how they fit their jobs into their lives. However, as George Clooney once pointed out, in the first season, there was a scene with a guy who had an arrow stuck in his head, and the doctors coolly pointed him in the direction of Admitting, but after he'd left, the same scene would have been handled by having all the doctors marvel about how the guy had managed to survive, and having Carol Hathaway start crying because she'd have flashbacks to surviving an Indian attack as a child.

While we're on the subject, is a shift like that a deliberate choice by producers, or a natural consequence of a long-running series running out of stories, as David Mamet argues in his treatise on drama, Three Uses of the Knife ( "If we watch any television drama long enough, the Clinton White House, or Hill Street Blues, or ER, we will see the original dramatic thrust give way to domestic squabbles. After a while, the new is no longer new, and we require drama.")?

Remember that not everyone watches solely for the character that is your personal favorite. Especially with large ensemble shows (ER, L.A. Law, Dallas, Chicago Hope and countless others), some of us WILL stop watching if you cut out our favorite supporting player in order to cover the cost of an ever-increasing salary for your egomaniacal "Star". We also don't want our favorite cast member's role marginalized in favor of whatever "hot young thing" you bring into a show because you think it will attract younger viewers. Last but not least, stop making every freakin' Sweeps Episode a flashback show (West Wing, I'm looking in your direction). Sometimes it's nice to see a story play out in linear fashion, and we don't want to see the ending of the story at the beginning of the epsiode. Plus this will eliminate those pesky "Two Hours Earlier" or "The Previous Day" captions that your viewers despise with the white-hot intensity of a thousand suns.

1. If your show is one that tells storylines over the course of multiple episodes, do not allow anyone to write a full script until you have written up a two page description of every episode of the current season, and the first four episodes of the next season.

2. If any actor or actress demands a minimum contracted amount of screen time, tell them "thanks, but no thanks".

If you have a stable of writers who float in and out, said writers must watch previous episodes of the show so that we don't see people inexplicably act wildly out of character.

And my biggest peeve: please stop amping up the crazy as time passes. Buddy on Charles in Charge started out a lovable nitwit; he ended downright retarded. Monica on Friends used to have that weird cleaning thing, but by the end of the show's run, she became an OCD freak.

I know the show is in decline and you must do something to keep people interested. Making the characters insane ain't doing it.

Oh, yes. This is number one. If the show is good, even the dumb people will watch it - they just won't get everything, but that's okay.

Also - do not jerk around your characters because you've just thought of a plot development that you think is totally awesome. If it doesn't fit the characters as they've been written, don't do it. Think of some other totally awesome plot development - don't just keep changing the characters to fit your wonderful storylines.

Seriously, writers/producers - if you dream up what you consider a completely awesome plot development, sit down and watch all the old episodes of your show first, then ask yourself, "Does my completely awesome plot development fit the characters?" If the answer is "no," don't do it. And don't wank your way into it. Ask your spouse/significant other, your friends, your mom, etc., "Hey, would this plot development fit this character?" If they say "no," don't do it.

If you are just hell-bend on including your totally awesome plot development, push it back a few episodes so you can build up to it in a believable manner. The key here is "believable," please do not forget that.

Just bear in mind that most viewers like shows because they like the characters. You keep jerking them around to the point where we can hardly recognize them, we get a bit testy and we just might stop watching.

Another very important tip: All important information and events tied to characters, such as age, where they went to school, where they lived, where they work, the date they were in a horrible accident, the date their parents died, etc. - WRITE THAT DOWN.

Once you write that down, post it on the wall in the writers' room. Make sure everyone knows about them. Then hire some college kid with writing aspirations as your fact checker. You don't have to pay him much - he'll be practically wetting himself over the fact that he is working on an actual television show. This kid can catch things like "This character is from Miami, but this script says he grew up in Michigan" before they make it into the actual episode.

You guys may not be able to remember this stuff (even though you WROTE it and spend hours/days writing and going over these details and then filming it), but we do, and it ticks us off when you can't be arsed to check your own history.

Remember: If you must write in a pregnancy, it last nine months. Nine. Not 12, not 18 months.

See also, "Cold Case" and "Without A Trace."

Great thread! Too bad no one running a network will ever see it (because we all know they can't read).

This one may not be popular, but...

A show can be interesting without everyone having sex with everyone else. In fact, a show can be interesting without anyone having sex.

All great ideas. Some of my favorites: So much word. I find this stuff to be really boring, and definitely alienating.
Ahem, Lauren Reed, a character who IMO is at least partially responsible for Alias' decline.
Gah, you wouldn't think this would be too difficult! The Lost writers could use this handy bit of advice. Seriously, if I (not a professional writer by any means) can do this for the stories I write for fun, it should be required for television writing.

My suggestion: When it comes to letting washed up losers from a reality show do another reality show, just say no.

Absolutely. As an adendum, I’d say that if you don’t have a plan in place and then the viewers don’t like the story you come up with to deal with the situation, don’t blame the actress. It makes you look like a huge jerk who's somewhat incompetent. Glenn Caron of Moonlighting and Joss Whedon on Angel were both guilty of this, I think. Correct me if I’m wrong. But they both seemed to do the passive-agressive “I had a great plan but then she got pregnant and shot everything to hell so I had to come up with something else.” Oh you did? Well too bad. Things happen. Actors die. They get sick or injured. And if you have females of child-bearing age, there’s a chance they’ll become pregnant (even if they’re making an effort not to -- birth control is never 100%). As the runner of a show, it’s your job to deal with these unexpected events in a story- and character-appropriate way that fits in the show. If you can’t do that, suck it up and admit your mistake. It’s no one’s fault but your own.
Actually, in both those cases I mentioned, the women’s characters ended up suffering quite a bit. The more I think about it, the more angry I get. But then maybe I’m remembering things wrong.

Here are some rules that I would love to force on quite a few showrunners:

1. A couple is allowed to break up and reunite just once over the entire run of the show. After that, the breakup has to be permanent or it can't happen at all. If the breakup is intended to lead to reuniting, the reuniting must occur within 12 episodes of the breakup.

2. Any character can only be involved in two breakups over the entire run of the show. A character can be involved in only one breakup per season. There can be no more than two total breakups per season.

3. If two characters get engaged to be married, they must marry. The marriage must take place within 10 episodes of the engagement. You may end the marriage with a divorce or death, but the characters are required to stay married for at least one season before you can do this. You are limited to ending just one marriage over the entire run of the show.

4. If a character ever "leaves town", they are not allowed to come back. Ever. The only exceptions are vacations, funerals, and business trips.

5. If a former romantic interest, or potential romantic interest is not present on the show for at least 5 consecutive episodes, that character is required to have met somebody else, fallen madly in love with that person, and abandoned all romantic feelings for any other character on the show.

6. If a female character thinks she is pregnant, she must really be pregnant. A female character is only allowed to get pregnant after 7 months of unprotected sex with the father.

7. If a character "dies, but not really", you must reveal the fact that they are not really dead in the very next episode. Otherwise, they are really dead.

8. If a romantic interest, or potential romantic interest of a character dies, that character is not allowed to participate in any romantic storylines of any kind for at least one season's worth of episodes.

Rozinante, I hear you.

Here's a rule for action/adventure shows. If your hero gets his butt kicked six ways to Sunday, he MUST end up with bruises and a limp. He is not allowed to be 100% A-OK in the next scene or even in the next episode if it's a serial. Take a medical class if you have to, but get it right. Your makeup people want something to do, and your actor might enjoy actually, you know, acting.

This may fall under something more along the lines of netqork gripes, but here goes:

Don't come crying to me when you move your moderately popular and enjoyable show into a time slot against a ratings forerunner then have to cancel the show due to poor ratings. Especially when it used to be a in a great timeslot because everything else that was on at that time was crap. Not only did you make a bad scheduling move, getting a good show canceled, but you took away the only enjoyable half-hour/hour of television on that particular night.

Thanks for mentioning this. One major offender I can think of is Night Court I can understand them getting serious when two of the cast members died, but it seemed to me that they laid the drama on quite often, a bit too much for my taste. When I watch a sitcom I want to laugh. If I want to see drama, I can tune into Law & Order.

Have an ending for your show. Have an ending that makes SENSE. Write this ending when you write the pilot episode. That way you won't make up some half-assed ending that is sure to piss off your fans because it has nothing to do with anything that happened in the series.

Seinfeld? The X Files? Enterprise? I'm looking at YOU.

Absolutely. My main reason for losing interest in a show is that a character or character in it has mysteriously turned into someone else. Believable growth is okay, even necessary but generally it's more invasion of the bodysnatchers.

Plots, on the other hand, are allowed to be different on a weekly basis. Honestly.

Characters should not have stereotypical names. Athletic characters don’t have to be refer to by only their last name. Nerds, dorks, etc should not have to be subject to weird nicknames and also be among their own kind. (They don’t have stay round the popular people just to be made fun of, right Screech.) If a becomes character is too stupid to spell their name later on then they should have been named something else.

Just because there is a single boy character and a single girl character doesn’t mean they have to have hookup. Also the only gay character in the town doesn’t have to go for the only other gay character. Just for the sake of sweeps.

Also I agree: Comedy don’t need PSAs

Don't get rid of one of your few good actors (E.R. - Paul McCrane)
Don't insult the viewers intelligence (Well lookee here...E.R. again, chopper#2)

Characters can have romantic relationships outside their workplace. On the same note - sometimes male and female co-workers are just co-workers, with no frisson, love-hate, unrequited love, or anything.

Ok I love this thread, this is why.

1. Writers you MUST keep a story board - that helps with continuity, things like Grissom not knowing what was important about the date August 17 – it is his birthday for Pete’s sake. CSI try reading your own webpage now and again.



This is a huge one for all shows. Stop giving us OOC moments.

2. Writers if you get tired of your characters given them over to us, or come and read our fan fiction, we care about the characters very much and we are tired of you treating them so badly!
3. Please no more musicals. Most notably 7th Heaven. There is an ugly rumor that someone somewhere wants a CSI musical, please please don’t. Not even as a joke.
4. No more dream sequences, there is just no show where this will work anymore, it is alright if you want to show a flashback, but dream sequences tend to produce OOC moments and that has already been addressed.
5. Oh and if the kids you have can’t act, please replace them. 7th Heaven I am looking at you again. There are plenty of children you could have hired in the meantime. Trust me!
6. Please writers come read these boards, we have tons of advice, you can see what is working and what isn’t, and we are fine with pointing out your errors and will set you back on track!

Dear Writers: There are actually people in this world who are interested in dating someone who is not interested back. I'm not talking about long stretches of unrequited love for a best friend. I'm talking about strangers. People meet strangers all the time, want to date them, and the other person's just not interested.

Honest, this actually happens in life. Most people don't simply get their pick of dates. Seriously.

If you write a character who is supposed to be a pre-eminent expert in his or her field, requiring both graduate degrees and some on-the-job experience, do not cast a 22-year-old hottie. In fact, try to cast someone over 30 (he or she will be happy to stop playing a high school student).

And just because two characters do work together does not mean they should be in a romantic relationship by default. Especially if they have zero chemistry.

If you can't think of something relevant for a character to do on a regular basis then it's time to revoke that character's regular status. If the problem persists then it's time to either change the direction of the character or get rid of them entirely.

Writers:

Please don't mistake chemistry for compatibility. When there are nothing but pretty people on your show, some chemistry is inevitable. Putting people together with, and I know this is a novel idea, common interests is never a bad thing. Complete and utter opposites do not attract all the time. And don't let viewers screaming "but they have chemistry!" deter you from not putting two people together solely on the premise.

Don't drag things out with the "official" couple of the show. Ryan and Marissa have broken up about 1000 times on The OC, we don't care anymore! Ditto for Clark and Lana on Smallville.

Don't make the mistake of thinking you can stretch "Will they or won't they?" over seven seasons. It ain't happening.

I think this is my favorite rule. Tis a good one.

If one of your characters is not well off financially, do not have them where designer clothing. And also, their clothing should reappear. People with little money aren't able to go out and buy new clothes everyday.

I'd actually prefer it if they didn't make the characters poor period. There was a "Frasier is poor" story arc on Frasier and it was craptastic. There just isn't anything funny about your characters (who the audience is suppose to like and identify with) being poor.

Not to be nitpicky, but from what I understand writers aren't allowed to look at fan-fiction. Something about the possibility of lifting ideas.

When using child actors, please ensure they do not keep looking offscreen towards their evil stage parents. It's so distracting. With babies it's not so bad, but when you have 10 year old kids constantly averting their gaze (and it is so obvious) it really pisses me off.

Also when using child actors, don't just use the first one that turns up at the audition and can walk upright. Take your time. I'm sure there are some good actors out there

The only fanfic I've read much of was Tenchi Muyo. If the fics there are an example of how well fanfic writers can stick to the characters, maybe it's good that the TV writers don't read them...

This one is for any show that is a prequel to an established property: Know the ending. For example, we all know that before Clark leaves Smallville and becomes Superman, he dumps Lana (or she dumps him) for the last time, and somewhere in there she learns his secret. She is not his soulmate, and they are certainly not destined to be together - that distinction falls to Lois (hard as that may be to believe, the way she's been written on the show).

Similarly, Trekkies know the history of the Federation, at least in its broadest outlines. First contact with the Klingons was not made on Earth, else Earth would have become a satrapy of the Klingon Empire. And who the hell are these Suliban? Nobody has ever made reference to them before, even as a species that became extinct (which would have come up sometime during the run of TNG - remember, Picard was an archaeology buff). If you're going to pull some silly timewar out of your nether orifices, at least explain why Timefleet, whose existence has already been mentioned, isn't involved.

I suppose this all falls under the First Law - don't insult our intelligence. :-)

If you MUST have the nerdy guy or girl have a makeover (and let's face it, they were just pretty people with unruly hair or slick combover), make it at least appear that they didn't just walk out of the house with a team of 15 people that consisted of the world's top hairstylists, clothing experts, make-up artists, and LASIK specialists (because we know that all nerds wear glasses) at their beck and call. Make it look like maybe their hip best friend helped them out, helped them style their hair, etc. Perhaps you can even show them actually putting in contact lenses or something.

Ah, the Xander effect. As a collorary, if you can't think of anything to do with the character and for some reason, won't get rid of them, please do not make the situation worse by turning said character into fate's buttmonkey.

Believe it or not, some fans are upset by seeing a formerly major, respected, character turned into a buffoon.