Thanks for reading my previous post, no one loves me. Centerfolds are Playboy Playmates, women who appear in the magazine are Playboy Bunnies. Bunnies are a dime a dozen, Playmates are special and Playmate of the year is their queen. Celebrities who appear in Playboy aren't considered bunnies or playmates, they're celebrities who did a special issue. I think, I may be wrong

So I constructed a chart (with help from Pity Free) -
Special Issue girls (ex: College girls, Midwest farm girls, girls who went on I Want a Famous Face on MTV, etc.)
Cyber Girls
Bunnies
Playmates
Playmate of the Year
Celebrities who do "cameos"


ETA

I'm not sure where to put Hef's GFs. I would think they go between Bunny and Playmate because they're always pictured with Hef and they have quasi-reconizable names. Then I think once they stop being Hef's GFs they become completely forgettable so maybe they should be lower than the SIGs.

In your hierarchy, ChocolateCherry, I would consider the "special issue girls" lower than Bunnies...those girls have nice bodies but only average to above average faces.

So where would the girlfriends fit into the hierarchy??

On MTV's I Want a Famous Face, one girl appeared in the College Girl magazine and had surgery to look like Pam so she could be a Playmate. She just looked really porny but the magazine featured her again. Her name was Sha http://www.mtv.com/onair/i_want_a_famous_f...ml?Patients=Sha.

Hugh really supports jazz and the Playboy Jazz Festivals at the Hollywood Bowl in June are very fun.

I wonder if at some point in this series they are going to touch on Playboy magazine's campaign to stamp out pubic hair. There's more hair on a newborn than on the centrefolds. I am not looking for beards or mustaches believe me. But I don't think women should necessarily have to soak themselves in a bathtub full of Neet to be cosmetically acceptable.

Nubbs are you male or female? (I hope they touch on that subject too! Darn Hef anyway! Someone should make him wax his bikini area!)

Ages ago, a writer at Jane (or maybe this was back in the days of Sassy) went for a test shoot for Playboy. The first thing that the photographer remarked upon was her hair. Not the hairdo on her head but her pubic hair - she said it was nice to see a girl who didn't have it completely shaved off. Later the writer met with Hugh Hefner and she asked what he looks for when deciding who to put in the magazine. He said the biggest factor is that they must have pretty faces because they can airbrush anything except ugly. Of course, pretty is subjective and we've seen what he thinks qualifies as pretty: hair bleached within an inch of its life!

It should be pointed out there there is a BIG gap between "playmate of the year" and "celebrities." After all, as we discussed, one doesn't exactly lead to the other. Also, most of the celebs who pose in Playboy now are so D-list, I'm surprised Kathy Griffin hasn't put her plastic cooch in the magazine. I think that contributes to Playboy's declining stock.



Except then, we'd have to see his bikini area. Yuck!



I wouldn't say so. I think "quasi-recognizable" implies a first AND last name basis there (even the idiots on Kill Reality realize that.) I mean I've been INTRODUCED to them, and I still can't tell which indistiguishable blonde skank is which. So much for "fame", ladies.

Male. But I can sympathize with women because I hate having to shave my face. And I participated in a clinical trial once where they glued all this shit to my chest, legs, and arms and then in the morning yanked it all off. So I know that waxing must be a bugger.

Too true about the D list celebrities. Remember Darva Conger? And didn't Debbie Gibson pose in April or something? Debbie Gibson?

Yup, and Tiffany too a couple years back.

As you're reading Playboy, there's a pecking order.
The first pictorial in the issue is usually random nude models (bunnies) and they'll be on the beach or a yacht or whatever. If there are old Playmates they'll be identified in the caption as Miss July '98 ___ ____. Other times it might be a woman who's famous for something but not really a celebrity. One issue had a woman who's a model for a lot of romance novel covers, another had a female boxing promoter, or it might be girls of the Big 10 or whatever.

Next you have the Playmate of the Month/ Centerfold. Bridget is very unlikely to become a Playmate because those girls are usually under 26 and look college-aged. They're very specific about a sweet-faced corn-fed Midwestern look, so if even if a woman is beautiful but has harsh angles, its not for her.

Last you have the celebrity pictorial, which in the Playboy world is usually B & C list celebs. Or former Playmates who've gotten to the level of B & C- list celeb: Pam, Jenny, Anna Nicole. According to Jenny McCarthy's first book "Jen-X" you sign away rights to the photos forever so if you did a shoot 5 years ago and now you've become an A-list movie star you could wind up in Playboy and on the cover and you can't do a thing about it. Like Charlize Theron was in the 5/99 issue when she first got famous (who knows when the pictures were taken?) and I guess they could re-run those whenever they like.

As for the blonde thing, Hef is obsessed with old movies and old Hollywood glamour so he's trying to capture the Marilyn Monroe/Jean Harlow/Lana Turner type.
I mentioned in the Cribs thread when the Mansion's ep was on that it seemed kind of weird, like Neverland for adults. He's got pajama's and living Barbies instead of military jackets and pubesecent boys.

I just saw 2 episodes, and the only word that comes to mind is "revolting." I had read about Hef's girlfriends before and never really thought about it much until I saw this show. Like nubbs said in a post a few pages ago, I'm a young, heterosexual male and therefore am in the target demo of what Hefner is going for, and even I found everything about what was portrayed in this show to be abhorrent.

I'm trying to think of what skeeved me out the most, but there's so much to pick from. Maybe it was when one of the women had to go and ask permission to use the big tv? Or maybe when Hef called them in and they were afraid they had gotten "in trouble" like a bunch of teenage girls about to be grounded by their father? Paging Dr. Freud.... I think it might have been when the "Number 1 Girl" (blech, just typing that makes me feel dirty) confessed that she hoped that some day Hef would give up his other girlfriends so she could be alone with him.

I'm not somebody who thinks that it's any of my business what other people do sexually if it's legal and consensual, but it strikes me that the women in this show have some serious "issues." I don't think you need to be a psychiatrist to think it's not entirely healthy for an adult woman to claim that her highest aspiration is to be one of several rotating sexual playthings for an old, wrinkly man and claim that she is "in love" with the guy. Yeeach.

I was fascinated by the first episode because I had so many questions about the details, which I realize will never be answered.

Like: Are these women on a payroll? In other words, are they paying taxes and contributing to Social Security?

What expenses do they have? Looks like they get "free" room and board, and possibly a beauty and clothing allowance ("put it on Hef's account"). What about cars? If one of them showed up to move in with him and had an old clunker, did he give her a choice of any car she wanted, up to, say, a $40,000 price tag?

Does he make them weigh in if they're looking fat and do they have to promise to maintain a certain weight?

How does a girlfriend get "dismissed" and have any of them ever sued him?

Has Hef had a vasectomy that maybe Holly doesn't know about? I'll be he has. I doubt that he wants other children. In fact, I thought I read or heard something recently that said he definitely did not.

Holly is a bit delusional (she says "we're so in love!" way too often), but I think she's beautiful and she has a sweetness about her. I think she really would stay close to Hef and be kind to him, even if he was 100 and drooling in a wheelchair. Give him another 10 years, Holly, and you may get that wedding ring!

Buy your own damn beach balls!

I keep wondering about these women and what they plan to do next. I mean, what kind of career do you have after being Hef's "girlfriend"?

Besides, Hef has this incredible aversion to his "girls" doing porn. I don't get that. He can sleep with women a quarter his age but if she turns around and does porn, it's over.

I'm kind of annoyed right now. Girlfriend whomever is snarking that the girl doing a test shoot is drinking too much. She's really snarky.

And why was she looking at Playboy when she was 5? She says she wanted to be a Playmate since she was 5. Who was feeding this woman Playboys when she was a little kid?

Was it really necessary for Kendra to invite her mom, grandma, and little brother to the "luau" at the Playboy mansion? I feel like maybe they should have met at the Red Lobster for dinner or something. Can her mom be naive enough to think that nothing is going on between her little girl and that dirty old man? Ick.

Also I thought it was funny when her mom and grandma were standing next to Hef, because I think her grandma and Hef are the same age.

How is taping beach balls on someone's bedroom door funny? I don't get it.

You put into words exactly what skeeves me out about Hef and his lifestyle. I think he still is trying to live in the 60's when his lifestyle and his magazine literally did define what it meant to be a playboy. In reality his is an older man who is not aging gracefully.

As for the women, when I first started watching, I was hoping that they were smart enough to enter into a mutually benefical "sugar daddy" relationship. But it seems that Hef is getting the better half of the deal. (If you are shacking up with someone as rich as Hef, please aspire to have him do something more than pay for your message therapy certification.)

Who's willing to bet that Kendra is getting it on more with that used up porn reject Destiny than she is with Hef? On the other hand, there really isn't a bet there at all.

And way to pull out the lavish B-Day gifts there, Hef.

There is nothing remotely sexual going on with Bridget and Hef or Kendra and Hef (Hmmmmm, I'm not quite sure the same applies to Holly...gag). It's like watching a bunch of spoiled children following their senile Grandpa around.

I also agree that the beach balls on the door was extremely lame and not at all worthy of the big deal it was made to be.

I get the sad, sad feeling that some of these girls really do think they are "in love" with Hef. I keep wanting someone to go up to them and yell, "Get self-esteem enough to realize that you deserve to have a man who will be dedicated to you alone, and not make you part of a private harem fantasy."

Ok, "unfortunately" I missed the latest episode of this degenerate trash, but "little brother" is not so little. I heard that you have to be over 18 to go to the Playboy mansion. Because otherwise...ewwwww. Well, "Ewwwww" anyway.

I thought it was sad that Kendra said this was her best birthday ever. I hope she was exaggerating, but sadly I think she was telling the truth.

I was thinking about a previous poster's comments about how the Playboy Mansion is now a shadow of its former self when I saw that Holly and Bridget were in charge of buying all the decorations and then setting everything up. The whole thing seemed low budget (which is totally different from low key, although in this case the party was both).

The beach balls were so stupid. I guess it was sweet that the house staff or whoever those people were went through all the trouble of taking balls that they'd confiscated, er, traded for Playboy water at the jazz festival, but seriously WTF? Taping half inflated beach balls to her door shows that you care? And that big one in the middle looked like a flaccid penis (insert your own Hugh Hefner joke here).

Seeing Kendra try to joke around with the kitchen people at the beginning of the episode, it seemed really obvious to me that she is begging for approval. I have no problem with her talking to them and being nice to them, but when she kept repeating her stupid joke in Spanish even though no one was laughing or really paying attention to her, she seemed so pathetic. Not surprising though.

After watching the little dance in the back of the bus, I'm pretty sure Kendra's previous life included some time on the pole.

Yeah, with all that "staff" there, you'd think they would be able to do up a good party.

My take on the decorations, was Holly had made a comment that while the staff handled all the official events, this was something they did for each other.

Im getting the feeling that Kendra is just enjoying it for the free rent she is getting. I doubt she has to do anything more than kiss him in public every now and then. When they were walking up to his room just before he told them they were going to be in the mag, Hef leaned in for a kiss and Kendra just turned away. I dont know if she noticed him or not, but I thought it was funny. I think she is the only one that recognizes the situation for what it is, and I would be surprised if she were there another year. If she doesnt have to do anything but go out on thursdays then why not? I would hang out with him for a year or two, save some money and have lots of free time. I would spend my free time painting and getting a degree in art history though.

I havent figured out why Bridget is there. Maybe low self-esteem? On the surface she seems the one least likely to be there - she has an education and at least appears to have some goals (outside of posing).

Holly is delusional and thinks she has found a keeper. If she wants to be a trophy at least find a guy that will let her by the only trophy. I do get the vibe that she is more of his personal assistant then anything. I think he will hold onto her even if he doesnt have feelings. She is exactly what you want in a personal assistant: loyal, able to spew the company propaganda, and available night and day.

I noticed that Holly always seems to sit to his left, Bridget to his right and then Kendra to the right of Bridget. Is that a rule?

At one point, the mansion (and Hef's lifestyle) was a serious drain on the bottom line for Playboy enterprises. It was bad enough that there was even talk of selling it, so it would not surprise me if this is a "downsized" version of the original.

You'll never see a picture where Holly isn't right next to him. I've never noticed what side she's on, but I believe it is a rule (spoken or unspoken) that she gets top billing.

I noticed this too, celerydunk. She also looked pretty disgusted when she actually kissed him a few minutes later. How could a 20 year old woman not be sickened at the idea of being sexually involved with an 80 year old man? Hef is pathetic. Both my stepfather and father-in-law are in their early 80s. They are wonderful men, but both would readily admit to not being sexual dynamos anymore. Who does Hef think he's kidding?

I feel like I'm looking into an alternate reality when I watch this show. A reality where posing in Playboy is as meaningful and important and winning a Nobel Peace Prize. "Wow! So, Hef, you are actually bestowing me with the honor of having creepy men everyway wank to my heavily air brushed picture? Sob! I'm so happy!"

I'm still stuck on which ever one of them said they have wanted to be a playmate since they were 5 years old. Oy vay on so many levels. How the hell does one even know what Playboy is at 5 years old...but really, that just scratches the surface of how skeevy that comment was.

Ordering chinese chicken salad and fries or PB&J and fries for lunch? And keeping those figures? Are the playmates all bulimic or do they do coke? C'mon!

...hmmm...yeah definately convinced Kendra likes mufffins AND sausage for breakfast...

....still like her though...

I had the metabolism of a jackrabbit until I hit 27. I could (and did) eat like a pig because I loved food and I never gained an ounce. I ate fattening crap (we're talking fast food for lunch every single day), tons of carbs (I love rice, pasta, and potatoes!), etc. and always weighed 110 pounds. I also never exercised. I took dance classes when I could squeeze them into my schedule, but I did not work out obsessively or diet or make any effort to stay tiny. I never thought I would be defending any of the girls on this show, but it IS possible to eat and stay thin without drugs or an eating disorder. Kendra said that she loves working out (plus she's the youngest of the three) so I have no trouble believing that she can eat french fries for lunch and stay in shape.



Bridget said her dad always had Playboys around the house out in plain sight, and supposedly seeing all those beautiful girls in the magazine is what made her want to be in Playboy. I agree that even knowing about Playboy at the age of five is wrong. I'm all for being honest with your kids and not being ashamed of the human form, but seeing Playboy at that age is inappropriate.



The consistent positioning (Holly on the right, Bridget on the left) reminded me of Destiny's Child with Beyonce in the middle 99% of the time. I guess Hef's girls know their place.

And don't forget about that picture of Bridget as a little girl with her shirt stuffed to look like she had a C cup. So something was a little off at home if her mom was taking pictures of that thinking it's cute.

I remember Pamela Anderson on one of her Stern visits being asked about her pubies. She said she normally shaves(not waxes) that entire area and was told she had to grow it back for her pictoral. She also said that they had her bleach the hair, and to do so she squatted in the bleach.

I wonder why she squatted instead of painting it on. And does Hef call a woman's vulva-labial area her "vagina", like Stern does? God, have none of his pals told him the vagina's actually the the tube you stick it in, not the stubbly mound? Yes, these and many other complex thoughts arise from an hour with these gals.

"Know thyself": Socrates/Plato/DelphicOracle/Apollo...not really the same as the Bible, but congrats to her for putting 2 and 2 together and coming up with onanism. Though of course, it's likely she heard it somewhere else.

I agree that a 20 year old finding any 80 year old do-able is very, very strange. When I was 20 I was grossed out by 40 or 50 year olds. Update: I am happy to report that, now that I am in my 40s, I am not only ungrossed out, I've developed rather a taste for them. Phew.

Except where's the red lips, the shorter, wavy hair, the eyebrows (okay, they have Harlow-thin brows). Yes those Juicy Couture suits are pure glamour.

ETA - Huh.What are those squares in my text?

I remember a few summers ago there was a reality show "Who Wants to Be a Playmate" on FOX (I could be wrong about the name but you get the idea). Anyhoo, Hef picked this one girl who was blond and wrote she was studying to be a veterinarian and Hef was like "I wanted to be a veterinarian when I was young too". This fact, combined with his crazy hording (word to whoever said that), leads me to believe that without money (or the appearance of it) or that mansion, Hef would be your run of the mill animal collector or crazy cat lady.

For a truly appalling look at life inside the Mansion, check out The Killing of the Unicorn by Peter Bogdonavich. It's about his ill-fated love affair with Dorothy Stratten, the Playmate who was murdered by her psychotic husband in 1980. Stratten's story was later turned into the movie Star 80 with Mariel hemingway and Eric Roberts. Bogdonavich has nothing good to say about hef or the way Playboy chews up and spits out its Playmates.

I agree. She won't be able to pull that off once she's in her 30s, but she's young and active.

Seriously, there's a message for the parents out there: The casual display of skin mags could mess with your daughters's minds. That's just so sad.

I don't believe there's anything going on, so why should her mom?

Hee, I was thinking the same thing. Aww, so cute -- oh, wait, Hef's with the granddaughter.

And could Kendra be any more needy and annoying? I kept wanting to tell her to use please remember to use her indoor voice. Just so screechy. And I agree with others, it's so very sad that that was the greatest day of her life. Si, senor, mi amour, ha ha ha ha ha; yikes, I don't think I could tolerate her for more than ten minutes.

OUCH!!! Holy crap that sounds painful. When it's time to get her roots done, I wonder if she dunks her head down into a bucket of bleach. Moron.

It's almost like they are treated like prisoners the other six days of the week though. Didn't someone upthread say that if the girls looked away from Hef at a club or went to the bathroom by themselves, that would be the end of their bunny career? I doubt he lets Kendra (and her girlfriend Destiny) go out on the weekends. She's young and seems kind of spunky; you'd think she'd get bored being locked up.

I also remember her saying something like "Hef saved me," which lead me to believe she grew up in a poor, broken home or something. However her family looked pretty middle-class to me. No dad in sight but her mom seemed relatively normal.

Seriously, who laughs like that?

Far be it from me to defend Hef, but I feel compelled to add my opinion regarding Peter Bogdanovich. Dorothy Stratten was an exceptionally gorgeous Playmate, and a number of men were competing for her affections: Hef, James Caan, her husband, and Bogdanovich, among others. Bogd had an asset that he used to lure and then "catch" Dorothy, namely the fact that he was a movie director and could cast her in his movies, which he did. And that's something that Hef has never been able to guarantee the Playmates: a movie career.

After Stratten's murder, there were a lot of recriminations flying back and forth, and since the murderer had killed himself as part of the murder/suicide, Hef and Bogd could only fling accusations at each other. Which they did, in an incredibly nasty fashion. Actually, Hef came across a lot classier than Bogd did in this particular case.

Bogd is way creepy: he subsequently married Dorothy Stratten's teenage sister, who was about 14 when Dorothy was killed. The sister, Louise, then had cosmetic surgery to look more like Dorothy. Bogd and Louise divorced a few years ago, presumably because Louise had just gotten a wee bit too old for him.

Every time I see Bogdanovich on "The Sopranos", the disgust wells up.

Hmmm. Maybe her parents are hardcore Christian conservatives who wrote to Hef, asking him to fund aggressive "straightening" therapy to save her from drifting toward the lesbian lifestyle she had seemed destined for. *cack*

bwah, Pity Free!

I noted Kendra's younger brother with his sneaky camera - gross. Also, if Kendra just turned 21, wouldn't Hef giving her alcohol prior to that be a crime?

I can't even imagine the glee some Playboy exec will have, evicting the harem/menagerie when Hef and his bad facelift croak. Oh, tell me all this crap's not a giant "business expense" writeoff for the company.

Hi all-

Can someone tell me if what I saw is right? I had to rub my eyes and look again.

On the 2nd epi (IIRC) the end of the day that was Kendra's b-day, the last scene showed Kendra, Holly (or whatever the main girlfriend's name is) and Hef, all in their PJs together in Hef's room, and then the door closes. Were they about to start some sort of 'Happy Birthday menege trois'? (or however the hell you spell it).

If so...ewwwwwwwwwwww!!!!!!!! No thanks I'm trying to quit!

Oh Yes - I was wondering if anyone else had taken note of that besides me!!

And oh my gawd what a bad boyfriend Hef is (and not just for the obvious reasons) -- Kendra didn't get any BIRTHDAY SEX!!!!!!!! Not that any young woman in her right mind would want any from Hef, but that's the fun of having a boyfriend. You should get some extra special sex on your birthday! I would have at least tried to shove Holly's ass out of the bed for one night to get some BenGay scented cuddling.

And speaking of Holly, this woman is trying way too hard. Does she spend all day finding fun facts to throw into conversations???? "The bible says to know thyself..." " More people are killed by falling coconuts than by sharks every year...." Jeez Louise, woman, Hef isn't going to marry you just because you know that there are more certified scuba divers per capita in Colorado than anywhere else in the US.

Correct me if I'm wrong here but the way I saw it all Kendra got from hef was a framed picture of the 2 of them and the frame looked like something you would get in the "teen decor" department of Wal-mart. If I was Kendra and I was having to be hef's "girlfriend" and all I got for my b-day was a picture and not some serious bling (excuse the outdated slang) I would be pissed.

As for as the gifts from Holly and the other one, I thought they were cute the kind of thing that young girls get each other for birthdays in high school.

On second thought maybe it was kind of pathetic considering how old they are.

"Pathetic" is a fabulous word for the whole show. I predict a whole new batch of blonde jokes in the very near future.

Hef is living proof that a man gets much better looking when he stands on top of his wallet.

Maybe it's a sign that Hef has seen Kendra's room and knew that the only kind of picture frame that would fit in with her decor was something from Claire's!

I thought the crap that the other girls bought her was appropriate - it was stuff that Kendra is clearly obsessed with (her Corgi, the Chargers, etc). Their gifts showed that they know what she likes without giving her stuff that was overly meaningful. It was like buying gifts for a co-worker.

Kendra is the prettiest of the three. Holly is entirely too blonde for her complexion, and Bridget, even though she is the most educated of the bunch, just isn't attractive at all, IMHO. If they want to hang with a pajama-wearing old man that has an inexcusably messy bedroom, more power to 'em. They may as well enjoy it while it lasts.

From what I have read, I can see why there aren't droves upon droves of young women wanting to be a Playboy centerfold, or a Playmate, anymore. Sure, there are plenty of women who want to, but the demand just isn't like it used to be. The mystique of the Playboy mansion clearly present in the 50's, 60's and 70's is clearly gone.

Here's a nice little online tidbit:

http://www.fuckedcompany.com/extras/playboy_email.cfm



According to the above e-mail, financial issues have been going on for a while. Maybe they have worsened as time has gone on.

Thanks for the FC post, tinabee... makes you wonder if 2002 (the year of that email) was when Hef downsized from 8 to 3 girlfriends.

This show's got to be one of the biggest backfires ever. Unless they just wanted "spectacle ratings" from women. Would any guys really watch this once they realize there's hardly any T&A compared to intarweb pr0n?

I think he also got her that sports jersey. But ITA, those were some low-rent gifts. Even if Hef's got considerably less money than he used to have, you'd think he could spend a few hundred dollars rather than $29.95.

I have no way of knowing for sure, of course, but I'd be stunned if these women weren't employees of the company with a job title like "hostess" and that they are paid a modest salary by the company. I doubt Hef spends any money that isn't on the company dime.

I'm surprised Hef lets all those yappy little dogs run around the mansion. They probably shit all over the place. Meanwhile the poor retarded looking cat is left to wallow in that sea of pink vomit. When Holly was "claiming" the bed that night when Kendra came in to say goodnight, the pomeranian wouldn't stop barking, it was saying "no my mommy gets the sex tonight- GET OUT! Only I get to watch!" If all these girls are such a bunch of geniuses why don't they get freaking jobs instead of partaking in the "oldest profession"?

I am guessing that their current job as Hef's girlfriend pays bettter that what Kendra, Holly and even Brigette, fresh out of school with no experience, would otherwise be qualified for. I am guessing that they must make at least $50k cash plus roam and board, car allowance, and hair and clothing allowance. Holly doesn't have her RE license yet. Who knows if Kendra ever finished High School. Brigette seems to have been a professional student.

Plus they get to sleep and drink on the job.

True, but their job security is nil. "Oh, I'm sorry honey. I see the beginnings of a crow's foot, and you've put on 5 pounds. The limo is picking you up tomorrow!" (sound of Hefs bedroom door closing, while in the background you can hear him order a PB &J with the crusts taken off from the kitchen, for his newest girlfriend.)