I don't have anything yet, but back when the Roswell-obsessed (I know) wrote poetry, I was inspired to write a villanelle. So, anybody up for a limerick or haiku to kick off this thread?

There is a P.I.
Her name is Veronica,
She has voice-overs.

Veronica Mars.
She solves crimes to get some cash.
Neptune is her hell.

I'm not in a formal format mode, so here goes some doggerel:

Fuckface, Dickwad, Horrible Cop.
Made Ronnie Cry
And Took Keith's Job.

V is smarter...
she IS Keith's daughter.
She'll catch Lilly's killer,
while Lamb goes to slaughter.

I thought I'd share the haiku sent to my phone from "Veronica Mars" after I signed up to "get a clue." This is regarding An Echolls Family Christmas:

Now this is my haiku about the end of Clash of the Tritons:

An abandoned car
Did Logan's mom kill herself?
Floatation device

You guys ROCK. I'm still waiting for inspiration to hit.

Logan, you are my
obligatory jackass.
You have cojones.

I tried writing this haiku in Japanese, and that experiment failed miserably. I did learn that according to the Google translator, there isn't a Japanese word for "jackass." What's also funny is translating the Japanese translation back into English:

You of the Logan are the jackass of my obligation. You possess the cojones.

Aren't languages fun?

Not a one of these is a traditional haiku:

must write a poem
or I'll be banned for starting
this poetry thread

Demon child Logan
stands by his locker looking
lost and tormented

Tritons! Say repressed
homosexuality!
--Veronica Mars.

Wallace on flagpole,
students laughing all around,
kids can be cruel, yo.

ETA: Post longer poems, please!

Question: is it all right if it's long form, rather than a haiku or limerick?

Oh please, please break the haiku chain! I think we've only written haikus because they're quick and easy to write. I would gladly welcome longer poetry.

Here's a thought: what if we tried to do our own pretentious versions of "I Cut Because I Can?"

There once was a lass name of Ronnie
Who's family did not have much money.
They lived with the rich
and dealt with some bitch
named Paris who's Mom bought her ponies.

And then there was a lad named Duncan,
who without Prozac had been something.
But when his Sis died
his brain he did fry.
The pills he did start with a pumpin'.

Next up is a guy name of Logan.
An ass and a half in provoking.
He used to be friends,
with Ronnie she says,
but now blames her for things unspoken.

I fancy myself as a bit of a poet, so I thought I would try my hand at a piece about VM. It takes all of those confessions in "Clash of the Tritons" strictly at face value, which might not be correct in the end, but it yields good writing.

Regardless, for all of you, here is my work:

the slaughter of lilly kane

the dead do tell their tales,
but they fade slowly in time:

their lives tossed onto a heap
of scraps, the wreckages of
other souls cut off in transit.
they will start to crinkle up

on the edges, fading from a
fluorescent white to decayed
shades of amber. the ink will
blur slowly, slowly twisting

her beyond recognition. it is
left to the people in her wake
to recall her as best they can,
to keep her from dying again.

not everyone has that in them.
not everyone can bear to recall.

the best friend, the pretty face,
she remembers her every day.
sarcasm hides the vengeance.
her beauty hides the wounds.

her double rose up to heaven
as life tumbled off into hell
for the girl with a pretty face
who lost everything she had.

the brother is adrift in a sea
of the mind, the horror lost
somewhere in waves of pills
and dreams he doesn't have.

(they both secretly reach for
the brick wall between them)

the boyfriend is cracking up:
wounded father, dead mother,
bruises blanketing his back,
weighed down by a guilt as

huge as his family's wealth.
every week, another twist
to his rainbow rubik's cube.
he scarcely recalls himself.

the lover, the local vandal,
holds up his rugged façade
but has a heart knifed open
that she'll never heal again.

(four bound by mutual pain
and divided by postal code)

friend searching for a killer,
brother hunting for his mind,
boyfriend finding destruction
and lover crying in a silence

that the dead girl rests within,
walking the earth of neptune
from memories to delusions
with her snappy fashion sense

as the only companion she has.
the paper crinkles a little more
each day. it's up to these four
to keep her from dying again.

Please let me know what y'all think …

I love that.

I read it twice. First time, I kept the show in mind. Second time, I separated it from the show and simply read it as a piece of poetry. I might have liked it better the second time around simply because the literal references taken from the plot, make powerful metaphors on their own.

a literal reference to the plot, but reading it the second time, it made me think of emotional bruises that he can't get rid of, like a monkey on his back (if that makes any sense). Maybe what I'm trying to say is that it works on many levels.

Anyway, i enjoyed it. Please write more.

Slightly off topic, but here's a lame joke.

Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Veronica.
Veronica who?
We would know that by now if she hadn't shreaded the freaking paternity results. Blissful ignorance sucks.

johnny panic, first, I love your Plath-inspired name. Your poem was lovely and made me happy to have started this thread. I like the Weevil stanza a lot.

wykbbb, hee!

Here's my haiku for the end of LOTB:

A long time ago
We used to be friends, but I
Need help finding LIPS

Veronica Mars
she stays out of bars
except on her cellphone

Veronica Mars
drives really cool cars
none of them is a 2-tone

Veronica Mars
P.I. to the stars?
That is, I think she'd like to be

Veronica Mars
No whiskey in jars
she'd never do that to Daddy

Okay, I'n not a poet, but this line is just stuck in my head:
Veronica Mars...

Blazers and tasers don't faze her

Ta-da!

I suck at poetry, but I feel like we need a haiku to represent our feelings. If anyone wants to edit it to make it sound good, feel free!

Oh Rob, save us please
From our summer agony
Who is at the Door?

Well I finally decided to delurk and I wanted to say johhny panic your poem is amazing!
I espeically like the lines

this and all of your metaphors were beautiful. Please post more poems. =)
edited because I can't spell and I'm new to all this

I wrote some Veronica Mars doggerel, so I thought I'd post it. Here are my attempts at a double dactyl and two limericks. (Well, maybe the second limerick is a "Learic" since I use the same rhyme for the first and last lines.)

Higgledy piggledy
Logan, Veronica
Duncan and Lilly all
Used to be friends.

Then someone kills Lilly
Unaccidentally.
Keith guesses who wrongly;
All of that ends.


Veronica Mars is a girl
Who ably makes mysteries unfurl,
But from sleuthing she guessed
Some potential incest
Was manifest, making her hurl.


Logan Echolls: the guy that we hate,
Whose initially psychotic state,
Of being an ass
Alas, oh, alas,
Abated. We take back our hate!

Kudos, divia! Nice job!

How I love my dear Jake Kane
Do not take his name in vain.
Or you will be
In lots of pain.

A haiku:

Someone's at the door
Is the script even written?
I can't seem to care

Veronica
Uses a Konica.
(Unless, of course, it's established canon
That she shoots with a Canon.)

Logan Echolls
Heckles
Wang Chung
With his silver tongue.

Mac
Can crack
A wack
Hack.

Dick Casablancas
Is likely to thank us
If we make the Beav
Less naive.

Tablesaw, you kinda rock.

I'm new to this thread, but I had to delurk to add this...

wykbbb, I kind of love you.

My pitiful haiku attempt:

VP Van Clemmons
Would like a word with Logan:
"Anthropomorphic"

Here are some more things I wrote.

A limerick:

Veronica and Duncan Kane,
Once happily shared some champagne.
Then thinking her his sister,
Disgusted he'd kissed her,
He left her and soon went insane.

A double dactyl:

Jeepery Creepery,
Lilly the hated Kane,
Pleased by hot sex with her
Boyfriend's creep dad:

Ended up dead because
He saw she took the tapes
Unsurreptitously,
Making him mad.

Another double dactyl:

Coming soon, coming soon
Someone is at the door.
It should be Wallace but
Rob says it's not.

"Love interest" he said, not
Uncategorically.
I hope it's Logan, not
Duncan; he's hot.

So, better late than never:

with apologies to Edgar Allen Poe

Once upon a late night dreary while I reclined, weak and weary
After being very nearly killed, I was in the mood for no more
But while I rested, almost napping, suddenly there came a tapping
As of someone gently rapping, rapping at my back door
"‘Tis some visitor," I muttered, "rapping at my back door
Only this, and nothing more”

Curiosity led me to wonder even with sleep's power drawing me under
Its spell, and my dreams no longer torn asunder by Lily's murder the year before
Just who was the visitor tapping, and interrupting my belated napping
By their continued rapping, rapping on my back door
Just who was this visitor rapping, rapping on my back door
To disturb my slumber evermore?

Was it Lily's ghost awaiting greeting to grant to me a final meeting
And talk of my fame, however fleeting, for catching her killer evermore?
But no, that way the shark has jumped, and viewers who were happily stumped
By my mysterious ways, will have me bumped
From their schedule, to return nevermore
They'll smite me from their TV schedules to return nevermore
And cry, "Veronica Mars, say no more"

Was it Duncan, my boyfriend ex, returning now that there was no hex
On our relationship, since our act of sex was not "ewww!" worthy anymore?
But such thoughts might be to no avail since his father Jake is now in jail
And Duncan might be trying to bail him out, or forget me evermore
Or he might want to wail at how life with me gave him troubles galore
And think of me nevermore

Perhaps it is Logan, whom I once despised, but then regarded with loving eyes
However, were there too few ties between us for us to be together anymore?
For our relationship was sorely tested
By the police, through me, having him falsely arrested
To say nothing of my having bested his father for criminal acts galore
Does he still have a vested interest in seeing me anymore
Or will he too think of me nevermore?

So to my back door I flew, and upon opening my smile grew
“I was hoping it would be you,” I said, with joy in my heart once more
As to who it was – well, we think it best to end our tale before our guest
Reveals himself in public lest we be forever branded as a spoiler whore
But will we ever disclose the guest who is standing outside that back door?
Quoth Rob Thomas, “Nevermore”

(Till 9/8 central on Sept. 28, at least)

Edited to fix a slight grammar error

ethanvahlere, that poem made my night. Thanks.

Wow, that was amazing ethan!! You should so send that one to Rob!!!

ethan, great job! I'm thinking of printing it out and keeping it on my wall until the premiere.

ethanvahlere that was great!

Some double dactyls about season 2, the mysteries:

New Season, new season,
Season long mysteries:
Logan woke up next to
Felix's stiff.

Also the bus driver
Incomprehensibly
Drove a bus full of kids
Over a cliff.

and the romance:

Romance-wise, romancewise,
Our pal Veronica
Broke up with Logan and
Is Donut's chick.

Ex-boyfriend Logan's main
Extracurricular
Is fucking Kendall, the
Stepmom of Dick.

And finally, because I can always hope:

Guy on guy, guy on guy,
Logan and Weevil the
Best couple yet on Ver-
onica Mars.

You say my dream has not
Come to fruition, but
Homoerotically
They WILL be ours.

with apologies to Melissa Etheridge

Just to be clear, Logan is singing to Veronica, while Meg is singing to Duncan:

Logan sings:
Go on and close your eyes, go on imagine me there
He’s got similar features with shorter hair
And if that’s what it takes to get you through
Go on and close your eyes, it shouldn’t bother you

You were the best part of my life when it was grim
But during all that time, were you only thinking of him?
I drove you home on the back streets every night
And now you’re throwing me away because you think I’m not all right
I said that all I ever wanted was you
And this is what I get, it’s as if you were waiting for your cue

Meg sings:
Go on and close your eyes, go on imagine me there
She’s got similar features with shorter hair
And if that’s what it takes to get you through
Go on and close your eyes, it shouldn’t bother you

You once told me that you thought I was “kewl”
And now it turns out that you were playing me for a fool
The funny thing is I used to think she was so nice
But now I’m standing alone, paying the price
Of course you didn’t mean to hurt me, cause you’re not that type of guy
Well, I know you better than you think, and I think it’s all a lie

Logan and Meg sing:
Go on and close your eyes, go on imagine me there
He’s (she’s) got similar features with shorter hair
And if that’s what it takes to get you through
Go on and close your eyes, it shouldn’t bother you

Logan sings:
I thought you were my last hope
And then you cut me, smiled, and said, “Nope”

Meg sings:
She acts all glad to have you back
I just can’t wait when she stabs you in the back

Logan sings:
Go on and close your eyes, go on imagine me there
He’s got similar features with shorter hair
And if that’s what it takes to get you through
Go on and close your eyes, it shouldn’t bother you

Meg sings:
Close your eyes, imagine me there
She’s got similar features with shorter hair
And if that’s what it takes to get you through
Logan & Meg sing:
Go on and close your eyes, it shouldn’t bother you
It shouldn’t bother you

The lack of new episodage inspired me:

No Mars Today
No Mars today, my love has gone away.
The TV stands forlorn, a symbol of the dawn.
No Mars today, it seems a common sight,
But people passing by. Don't know the reason why.

How could they know just what this pre-emption means.
The end of all my hopes, the end of all my deams.
How could they know a palace there had been,
behind the screen where my love reigned as queen.

No Mars today, it wasn't always so
UPN was gay, we turned off and walked away.

(with apologies to Herman's Hermits)

So not that I believe anyone cares, but I've decided to pull my former poem(the content being as vile as 3 day old cream chicken! blech!) and instead insert another Lilly themed poem(cause I miss her like whoa!), which probably also sucks. But at least I won't have to cringe everytime I pass this thread. So here it goes...

Passing Rememberance For Lilly

Like the shot of a pistol in peach twilight
I recall the dangerous vibrancy of the core of your eye
Laughter, your sequined dagger, rings in the air- O
Lilly- that lover, the sun shouts in manly despair
Yet the fool should remember you're as a pearl descending

I've had this in the back of my head for awhile, and I finally got around to writing it.
With deepest appologies to The Beatles.

Lilly in the Sky with Diamonds

Picture yourself on your bike by the ocean,
with tropical trees and sapphire skies.
Somebody calls you, you answer quite slowly;
a girl with kaleidoscope eyes.

[Ref.] Lilly in the sky with diamonds
Lilly in the sky with diamonds
Lilly in the sky with diamonds, ah, ah...

Follow her down to a bridge over a river,
where mothers and sons cast troubles away.
Slowly you smile as you ride past a bottle
that once was a boy's only friend.

Flashing lights appear over your shoulder
coming to take you away.
Climb in the back with your hands in their cuffs
and you're gone.

[Ref.]

Picture yourself in a cell on an island
with hulking guards with long clip-style ties.
Suddenly someone is there at your door;
the girl with kaleidoscope eyes.

[Ref.]

Thought Forsquilis' post in the ep thread re: Mac and Beav deserved to be here:

A Veronica (circa the Pilot) poem:

pretty pariah girl

pretty pariah girl
knows just what you don't
it swings about smartly
in her vindictive,cresent smile
pretty pariah girl
sees just what you won't
in widely beaded eyes of black
brillant as tainted stars
and words, boomerang-style
about a pretty waist, eloquently
they fly like remoted planes
but who should detect, at the edge
of darkened lids like ghostly ivy
pretty pariah girl
keeps neat, invisible worlds
they deep of the past's indigo champange
and the harder liquor of regret

So . . . I dont write poetry, I actually hate it. But I wrote this at school one day and I was like "What the hay, I'll put it on TWoP." So yea . . .

Weevil, Weevil, Weevil
09er’s think he’s evil
But we know that’s not true
‘Cause Weevil’s nice to you

He doesn’t do well in school
But we still think he’s cool
Been a senior for two years
And fails exams as summer nears

He used to lead a gang
Where they spoke Hispanic slang
But they crushed him like a bug
Because he didn’t want to deal drugs

Weevil’s best friend died
And although he didn’t cry
We know that he’s sad
And cherishes the times he had

Some think he’s a criminal
But the chances are minimal
He wouldn’t commit a crime
‘Cause “Weevil love you long time.”

**I know Weevil didn't fail all his exams since he passed his Algebra one [Yay]. But this was written before that.