Bah. I merged an extra 'bad relationships' into the original 'swoon' thread and mucked it all up. Here's the new bad love thread.

I've said it once, and I'll say it again: Oz owns this thread. There is no way anything can beat the execution make-out session Ryan engaged in while poor Cyril was screaming his name moments before getting fried.

Nevermind.

For me, one of the squickiest "romantic" plotlines was on 90210 when Brandon was having an affair with one of his columnists, who was writing about the whole thing in her column. And Kelly, Brandon's girlfriend at the time, was reading the column, and was all gung-ho about how the woman that the columnist was writing about should totally go for it with the guy in question, and, just, ew.

Fabrisse:
And, really, this just happens unacceptably often on daytime. In fact, the same thing happened to Days of our Lives' Laura Spencer (Yes, we have one of those, too!) and Bill Horton.

Spike and Buffy. It was wrong, gross, made very little sense and destroyed the show.

Okay, I hope this is meaty enough. On Friends, I couldn't stand any "romantic" moments between Joey and Rachel. I mean, Joey pining for her in season 8 wasn't so bad, but it still struck me as pointless and wrong. They gave no real justification for why Joey would fall in love with her. One week, they're just roommates and friends like normal, and Joey even says that it would be too weird if he had sex with Rachel just to relieve her fourth-month pregnancy. Then the next week, they go on one pretend date and bam! he's suddenly desperately in love with her. Cue the mopey angst. What the hell? Where'd that come from? I didn't buy it, nor did I like having to see Joey rave about how "perfect" Rachel is. Barf! If any woman was clearly "perfect" for Joey, it would be Phoebe, with whom he had a special connection, and mutual flirtation for many years.

In late season 9, when they revisited Joey/Rachel, the writers again were totally lazy and relied on the contrivance of Rachel's Dream, Joey giving a BIG SPEECH about how he beautiful Rachel was and that she was the first woman he ever loved. Bull! He clearly loved Kate in season 3, and he had crushes on, or was interested in getting serious with, other women--like Ursula, Janine, Erin. It was also especially disgusting that Rachel was portrayed as being a horny, giggly, flighty girl who just lusting after Joey. It was gross every time they kissed onscreen. Stupid writers! Grrr!

And of course, I hate every Monica/Chandler sappy moment, just because I hate her so much. But that's enough ranting for now.

Word. And I'll add on Cordelia/Angel. Ick. The actors looked liked they rather be kissing their respective siblings.




Huh, what?! I left GG after Rory went away to Yale... damn, I had no idea. Eww.

Yet the romance that annoys me to no end is and will always be Becca & Tyler from Life Goes On - the antithesis of chemistry.

Although nearly all of the "romances" on 7th Heaven qualify for this thread, Lucy's romance with Kevin has got to be one of the worst relationships on TV. She's immature, selfish and shrill, he's emotionally and verbally abusive and patriarchal, they have nothing in common, and even less chemistry. Kevin thinks Lucy is crazy because on 7th Heaven, all women are crazy due to their hormones and need a man's steady hand to make decisions and live their lives. But he "loves" her anyway, so long as she does exactly what he wants. She, in reponse, acts like a ten year old and has never once had a serious conversation with her husband about anything important. God, they suck.

Hands down, the barfiest romance has to be Rob and Amber from Survivor: All-Stars. Just ew.
I'm a guy, so forgive me if I can't figure out what any woman would find attractive about Boston Rob. I know I'd probably put a bullet in both our brains if I had to hear him calling me "Ambuh" for the rest of our lives togethah. I didn't follow up on them after they left the air, so I don't know (or care) if they are still a couple. But I do want to thank them for producing some of the squickiest Survivor moments since Naked Gay Dude and Dude with the Melted Hands.

Don't feel bad, I'm a woman and I don't get it!

I agree with the Spike/Buffy and Cordy/Angel and I'll raise you Willow/Kennedy.

I didn't mind Cordy/Angel. I am a (ducks) Spuffy shipper. I never bought into Buffy/Angel after Becoming, Part II.

In that breath, also so anti Rachel and Joey.

Yeah, never like Becca and Tyler either, I mean I understand why they put them together, but ew.

Joey and Dawson grossed me out. Only time they didn't was their first kiss in season 1. I also didn't like Jen and Dawson really except in the New Hampshire episode.

Hmmm...how about Leo and Timmy's ex wife on Oz? That was pretty squicky. As was Ryan and Claire. Actually that was scarring.

Especially with Dean's panting scraping the inside of my skull like an icepick.

Vaughn and Lauren from Alias totally belong here. TPTB blathered PR drivel from pre-season straight through to turning her evil (which just ended up being even worse) that Lauren was this beautiful, wonderful, perfect woman whom Vaughn fell in love with while Sydney was 'dead'.

Not only was there no chemistry between them, but she came off acting more like his mother. The kind of critical mother that you don't like, even. It was sick, and having him carry on a relationship with a cold, dead fish would have been hotter.

I'm just reminding everyone that on the TWoP forums we like to post reasoned choices/examples and not just simple lists.

This is the difference between the too simple "Buffy and Spike" and the acceptable "Buffy and Spike because...."

Worst Romances:
Cordelia and Conner. WTH!!? She was like a mother to him...no she was a mother to him and know he's boning her. Yeah I know that she really wasn't herself and she was evil and all but still ...Icky.

Also Fred and Gunn. I don't know what it was but i just didn't buy it.

Six Feet Under

First of all Nate and Lisa. UGH. She was an annoying old bag who wouldn't shut up for the entire season. And they obviously hated each other.

Ruth and George
No chemistry, no similar interests, and hardly any communication skills. And also George is a prig and Ruth deserves better.

Friends

Joey and Rachel? C'mon. They have nothing in common. And besides that Joey had never wanted a relationship in his life and he suddenly loved Rachel?

I agree with the Spike/Buffy, which is definitely my #1 worst couple of all time. It felt like a betrayal of the Buffy character, and frankly it was sad to see a show that used to be somewhat dark and romantic turn into a 24/7 fest of utter despair that culminates in Buffy humping someone who used to be one of her mortal enemies. Also, I liked Evil Spike and it was awful seeing the character reduced to a sniveling puppy. And part of me felt like they were resorting to the cliched soap plot of "Bad Boy redeemed by the healing power of the Good Girl". I'm just surprised they didn't feature Kennedy as a former hooker with a heart of gold who was redeemed by the love of a good woman.

Joey/Rachel also fell flat for me. I agree that Joey's insta-love for Rachel felt completely contrived. And I always envisioned Joey ending up with a girl equally dumb and sweet as he was. I just couldn't see Rachel being attracted to someone like Joey.

I also despise Sam/Luka, since Sam feels a little too much like Abby v2.0, except that instead of booze complicating her life, Sam's got an annoying child. This is another relationship that feels like a product of the show writers throwing together a couple based on theory without first testing whether they have any actual chemistry. Sam is a classic example of a new character added solely to be a love interest, instead of the show trying to integrate her naturally into the show first. Of course, ER does this all the time.

Bwah!! Thank goodness I was through with my lemonade!

I think Carter & Abby was the most chemistry-less relationship on ER. They built the whole thing up when she was with Luka & then once Carby got together....flat. It was like watching 2 inanimate objects try to mate. The only thing more improbable than them getting together was the 2 of them breaking up. (Finally, thank goodness!) Carter was going to ask Abby-the-dysfunctional-center-of-the-universe to marry him? Words can't explain the relief I felt when he left that ring in his pocket.

Paige & Richard from Charmed--"can I get a side of bland with that bland?" The actor playing Richard had the range of a can of creamed corn. I think the Cooter Tat was less stiff. He had no personality, no real purpose on the show. Paige is already busy doing 4400 temp jobs, mediating between her family members and she has to "save" Richard's karma. Please. And again: chemistry-less. Vanquish that dude to the Waste Land.

Thanks for the new thread, Glark. For every beautiful romantic moment, there's an ohmygodpleasemakeitstopsweetsufferingmotherofcrapthisiswrong!!!



Hey, Lina - I'll see your Vaughn and Lauren and raise you a Lauren and Sark. Lauren turning evil was bad enough, but to have to see her bumping her uglies up against He of the Harem's lovelies was just nauseating. And the way he was practically falling all over himself to sing her praises after she betrayed him and handed his ass to the (Shovel) Heads of the Covenant was just...ugh! There are no words! He deserved so much better! JJ, darling, taking a well-loved character and matching him up with someone you knew we were going to hate from Day One is madness!

And while we're on the beloved/hated character mismatches, how about Lex and Lana from Smallville? He's a billionaire playboy with a shady past; she's a self-absorbed high school "student" who can't stop whining about her dead parents! He's possibly gay; she's the virginal-to-the-point-of-asexuality embodiment of every dirty old man's fantasy about naive teenage over-achievers! They're perfect together!

Seriously, people. Lexana makes Baby Jesus cry. Just give us the Clex and nobody gets hurt.

Man, you are so right. I just didn't see it.

The couple that probably irritates me the most, though, is Ephram and Madison on Everwood. Hate her. Hate their stupid relationship and all the lame drama it has caused.

Word. Just, word.

But then again, I always wanted Carter and Lucy to get together, so what do I know?

Ross and Rachel on "Friends". I hate the show with a passion, but I've caught a few episodes over the years out of boredom. How is it that the writers managed to drag out their ridiculous romance over a decade?

Ross manages to finally get the woman he's wanted since they were kids and yet they can't even decide what they want from each other. When Ross said Rachel's name at the alter when he was about to marry that British chick, they still were unsure of where to take the relationship even thought they clearly wanted each other. Then they got married in Vegas but they were still unsure of their feelings. Then they had a baby, yet were still unsure if they wanted to be together. WTF is this bullshit?

Sam and Diane they were clearly not!

Adding another notch to ER's bedpost here.

The Cleobot and Benton pairing killed my interest in that show. I am totally on board with Eric LaSalle's position that television needs more stable minority couples but sparks would fly out of my set when E.L. and Alex Kingston were just looking at each other. I could never get over the wasted potential. ER had ONE great couple and they ditched it over politics.

I hate them, too, except my mind cannot wrap myself around the fact that Sam has grown-up problems such as an annoying child. She doesn't look old enough to drink. He's almost 40. Their relationship is just icky, especially considering it is based on (mostly) sex. It gets even grosser when you stop to think that he fathered a daughter hat would now be in her late teens: Sam should be his slutty niece, not his girlfriend/sex partner. Plus she is shrill and annoying and I don't think it reflects any better on his pattern of behavior that he chooses to go after a pliant 24-year-old when not so long ago he was banging hookers. More of the same, it seems to me.

But ER has been terrible at romances. They got it okay the first couple of years. But lately (and by that I mean the past 5-6 years) it's been horrible. Noah Wyle can not do romantic chemistry at all. Professional relationships and platonic friendships with females he can do, but not romances. Anthony Edwards was laboring under the misconception during his entire run on the show that he was the sex symbol, not Clooney or Visnjc. This is the only explaination for his shirtlessness and the sex scenes with him in it we were forced to endure. Mark took someone who came in as pure sex appeal and ruined her and made her boring. Then he made her into a shrieking banshee which was even worse. Benton and Cleobot were horrible. Carsan -- what kind of juvenile crap was that? Luter --- ugh. No, The last thing I want to see is Lucy's thong. And how does she even know her grandparents have great sex?
KerSan -- Sandy was a bitch, and not even an attractive one at that. (Kim, on the other hand, was hot). And finally, one, I haven't seen mentioned because nobody remembers it, but Jeanie and her WTF exit. Marrying a guy she's dated for a couple of months and adopting an HIV + baby? And he wants to go along with it?

My most hated romance would be Luk and Carol. Although nothing really happened, the writers were so manipulative about where they wanted to go with that one that their approach alone would make it disgusting. "It was so "Here is the new guy, you WILL like him, you WILL accept him as a replacement, and we don't give a rats ass how offensive it is." It pretty much turned me off to attaching myself to any ships in the future.

The whole "romance" between Joey and Dawson (heavy quotes on the word, romantic, of course). Though the staff of DC tried to make it "cute", it was really a manipulative and sickening relationship.

Worst Moment between these two "soulmate" was of course the "hands sex" scene. The director showed us overdone hand-to-body groping, love-making dissolves and it wasn't sexy or romantic. I really can't watch that scene while eating...or doing anything else for that matter...

...well, except for screaming in pain.

"My dearest Dana... Love, Fox."

So wrong, so deeply, deeply wrong. I mean, nevermind that I personally was not a Scully/Mulder shipper...and nevermind how incredibly far off the rails the show had gone at that point (thank you 1013 and every pot dealer in the greater Los Angeles area) "My Dearest Dana," was so incredibly not how those characters had ever, ever behaved.

It stands, for me, as one of the most urp-worthy romantic moments on television. And all that stilted kissing. Icky.

[/QUOTE]Worst Moment between these two "soulmate" was of course the "hands sex" scene. The director showed us overdone hand-to-body groping, love-making dissolves and it wasn't sexy or romantic. I really can't watch that scene while eating...or doing anything else for that matter...
[QUOTE]

word

I'm probably going to get stoned for this, but every gooey-eyed glance that Sydney and Vaughn share makes me want to gouge my eyes out. The moment that made me scream at the TV the most was when S&V were chasing Sark, and Sydney stops chasing him to check on Vaughn's boo-boos. That, to me, epitomized the inappropriateness of their entire relationship. And Vaughn's little speech about his father's watch or whatever just oozed cheese. Buy some stock in Velveeta already. When the show started, I didn't mind the tension between them, because they knew they couldn't act on their feelings as operative/handler. And then they acted on them and it all went to hell in a handbasket.

And now I must go scrub my brain because of the mental images the mere mention of "s**lm**e sex" conjures. Bleah. Their "relationship" was so incredibly unhealthy, and they had the chemistry of slugs.

I also loathe the Grissom/Sara moments on CSI. As a general rule, I'm opposed to supervisor/subordinate relationships, and my TV viewing is no exception. The age difference also squicks me out, and the entire things makes Sara come off as needy and pathetic.

Gracie 77 - you aren't alone. I've never been a big fan of the Syd/Vaughn 'ship, mostly because Vanilla Vaughn has never really done anything for me - give me snarky, cuddly Weiss over Agent Amourous any day of the week. And it really started to tick me off when suddenly Vaughn was everywhere - suddenly he was a field agent going on all the missions with Syd. I liked it a lot better when he was the desk jockey who stayed behind and fretted while Syd went out and kicked butt.

I mostly tolerated their relationship, but that scene you mentioned when Syd stops to play kissy-face with Vaughn while Sark gets away totally pissed me off. Syd, the Worst. Spy. Ever. managed to get even worse in that moment. I felt vindicated as a Weiss girl when in an early season 3 episode when Weiss got hurt and Syd stopped to check on him, he yelled at her to go chase after the bad guy. I felt like going, "Now Vaughn, that is how you do your job!"

I just loathe Sydney/Vaughn. They are stupid and pathetic, I don't see the chemistry, and the transformation Sydney suffered from strong, independent and sexy woman to moronic, needy girlie girl just sickens me.

Carter and Abby - what about Carter and SUSAN? That was bad. She was (or at least, seemed) much older than him and there was no chemistry at all. And Kem and Carter, too. Kem was such a bitch - coming from Congo to the ER, suddenly treating patients like she owned the place, laughed at how fat Americans are, and managed to do all of it with that annoying arrogant smirk of hers. Ooo, how I hated her. I understand that Carter would fall for her in Africa, where there wasn't much hope, but in Chicago he had choices. Abby, despite her traumas etc, was better.

But it's true - although Noah is a hottie, he can't do the boyfriend role believeably. Or maybe the ER writers can only write good disease plots.

Big fat word on the Ross/Rachel relationship. The writers have tortured us for years with the "are they together or aren't they?" plot. And it's not done too subtly anyway. Phoebe asking, "Why aren't you together again?" And Ross's mom bringing Ross a ring for the birth. Yeah, we get it. They have history together, they've always been in love with each other, and now they have a baby, so why not? The Joey/Rachel thing was pretty much the same though. Do they like each other or don't they? They've been friends all these years, but now... When everyone knows that Rachel and Ross will end up together. We know, because the writers have made it painfully obvious that they think so. If this is their idea of excitement and tension, I feel sorry for them.

Let me join you in the Vaughn-Syd-hate. I mean, I haven´t liked any of her boyfriend choices so far, but these two together? Are about as exciting to watch as two potplants standing next to each other.



Which effectively took any purpose away from Dixon still being on this show. (No, I´m not bitter or anything, why?)

Another Alias coupling I found unfortunate was Sloane/Barnett, because it turned her from a rationalist, professional woman into a naive, schoolgirlish groupie and forced us to endure Arvin´s scary chesthair again.

Amen to not needing to see scary Sloane chest hair. And while we're on the topic of Alias, the Jack/Isabella Rossellini pairing totally skeeved me. For one, hello, she's Irina's sister! That's just wrong. Plus...she looked like a man. While I love my HoYay on The O.C. or Everwood, that was just...wrong.

The Ross/Rachel relationship really did suck after a while, which is too bad, since I loved it in the beginning. But talk about beating a dead horse. Plus, Ross turned into such a ginormous tool, I couldn't wish him on anyone.

Also horrifically bad: the Messianic imagery of the summer season finale of The O.C., when Ryan carries Marissa from the alley. I get that he's supposed to be the hero rescuing his twue wuv or some such bullshit, but give me a break.

And let us not forget every excruciatingly painful moment when HoCaine and the Sunglasses of Justice hits on his sister-in-law. Bad enough that it's his dead brother's widow. Even worse that it's HoCaine.

May I just add my voice to the rising chorus of 'Spuffy was a hideously bad and wrong idea'? I'm going to anyway. Then again, I think virtually every moment of post-chip Spike is an offense against God and man. And don't get me started on his &*"&*%"$%%%$ sooooooooouuuuuullll!

Also on my list off all-time worst romantic pairings/moments: Willow/Kennedy (no chemistry, not to mention created simply to 'remind' the audience that Willow is gay...as if her endless 'I'm gay..no, really, I'M GAY' comments didn't do the job), the Willow/Tara reunion at the end of S6 (Come on, Tara! I love you, but this proves you needed therapy desperately. Willow sucked your brain TWICE for her own convenience. This isn't a romance you need, dearie...not to mention it was manufactured entirely so Tara could be killed so Willow would have an 'excuse' to 'suddenly' go bad and try to destroy the world. Not my idea of hearts and flowers.), Spike/Harmony (it was sort of funny, because JM and MM are both such incredibly talented actors, but for a WTF? moment, the revelation that Spike and Harmony are together is tough to beat in the annals of television history.), Cordelia/Connor (She changed his diapers six months before she boned him. 'Nuff said.), Clark/Lana (she's manipulative and painfully pink, he's so in love with Lex it hurts. Just...no.), Jack/Sam (RDA and AT are two very attractive people who couldn't keep a two watt lightbulb lit with their sexual chemistry. Jack? Go play with Daniel. He's pretty, and you two have more chemistry. Besides, do we really want Jack to die?).

I have to chime in on Ryan and Marissa from The O.C.. Here is the couple around which the show revolves, but alas! Someone forgot to flip the MischaBot's "ON" switch.

Leaving MB's horrible acting aside for a minute - the way the Marissa character is written dooms the relationship from the get-go. She's the typical screwed-up rich bitch with a heart of... well, scrap metal, it would appear. Add her drunk-damsel-in-distress act to Ryan's white-knight complex, and you have the recipe for ugly, destructive codependency. Ryan continues to throw away any decent relationships in his life (i.e., those with his foster family) in service of Marissa and her constant demands to be saved.

While most of the show's mature viewers recognize the relationship's sickness, many of its younger viewers love Marissa and see the relationship as liek sooooOOOOooo romantick! OMG!1! Kind of freaky, when you think about it.

But the WORST thing about the Marissa/Ryan pairing is that it's just plain Not. Fun. To. Watch. I mean, I can handle a little dysfunction when the actors have chemistry and share an interesting dynamic (Doug and Carol, ER; Nate and Brenda, SFU). But Mischa Barton couldn't make sparks fly even if you handed her a lit firework, so Ben McKenzie's trademark smolder is all for naught.

How could I forget Nate and Lisa? Doesn't anyone have a nasty nickname for her? Lisa was whiny, mean, bitchy, and selfish. She didn't even want Brenda LOOKING at her baby. Nate was to have no life, no expenses of his own, and then Lisa single-handedly made the decision of not going back to work, so he has to be the sole provider. They never made one decision together, and didn't do anything as a couple. I'm glad we're rid of her, although it was in a sad way.

Ruth and George may have been bad, but at least she knew something about him. What about Arthur? They were together for like two episodes, and Arthur was the only person in the world who's even more inhibited than Ruth.

Oh don't even get me started. I love Dixon and am still bitter with what they did to his character, just to put agent Yawn in every. single. mission. with his souuuulmate Sydney. ew.
Angel/Cordelia is just barf-worthy on so many levels. The actors have no chemistry, the storyline just didn't work -- just no.

That's what my biggest problem was with the Kevin and Rebecca relationship on Joan of Arcadia this season, which goes on my list as one of the worst ever. She hires him to come work at the newspaper, where she's his boss. Then she starts dating him and taking him home and having sex with him. Then she starts giving him all these promotions and great assignments. What the hell were the writers thinking?

Oh, amen. Plus, this is another example of a supervisor/subordinate relationship, which, as I mentioned above, is Bad. Same goes for the Sam/Jack affair on Without a Trace. Characters named Samantha and Jack just shouldn't get involved.

I agree with you on both Without a Trace and Stargate. But there's one aspect of both these relationships that skeeves me even worse than their total lack of mutual chemistry -- in both cases, he's her superior officer. It reinforces all the worst stereotypes about men and women working together, men keeping their real relationships (whether with buddies or girlfriends) at work, women needing daddy figures (OK, RDA is hot, but he's more than a decade older than AT and it becomes a factor when we're discussing stereotypes). Loathe, despise, HATE both "relationships."

This really bothered me, too - especially the way they flirted with each other pretty openly. It was like she was begging to get sued. I couldn't believe that nothing negative came from that - I'm sure the writers were pissed that the 19 year-old fact checker was getting all these articles published, so I doubt all the flirting would have gone unnoticed. While I was sad that they didn't have another good storyline for Kevin lined up when this relationship fizzled, I was very happy that they pulled the plug on it.

I don't have any problem with older/younger relationships. Then again, my grandfather was actually about a year older than his MIL, so that might color my thoughts on that subject. But I do have to agree on the question of subordinate/boss...especially when the subordinate is very subordinate.

On Stargate, Sam always calls Jack 'Sir', even outside of work. Even when he asks her to call him by his name. Somehow, I end up with this vision of her yelling 'Sir!' as she comes, and that's wrong on so many levels it hurts.

"Oh Maxwell! ...OH Maxwell! OH MR SHEFFIELD!!"

Dani257 has posted some spoilers about SG-1's Jack-Sam relationship.

It seems to me like the only relationship I bought into was the Doug/Carol relationship. I know some people like Benton/Corday, but I never liked them together. It always seemed like she was chasing him and he didn't have much interest in her, but he went along with it because it was easier than getting her to back off.

GAH! My brain just exploded...

ER pretty much takes the prize for most craptacular romances, but I especially hated the relationship between Mark Green and...I think her name was Cynthia. The one played by Mariska Hargitay. Absolutely hated her character, and the two of them together was just...bleah.

"Oh Maxwell! ...OH Maxwell! OH MR SHEFFIELD!!"

Okay, I may never eat again.

Oh, man, now I have to list my "Worst Romances" again. Not that I mind, who needs sleep anyway.

BtVS:
Buffy and Spike. Technically, these two weren't supposed to be romantic - but there were times the writers attempted this, and it just came out wrong and gave me the hives. Yes, they had chemistry, yes they were entertaining and interesting (at first, anyway - everything post Dead Things in S6 and the dreaded Soouuul! and general crap in S7 made me want to weap in pain). But oh, lord, whenever I hear these two being refered to "romance" or anything similar, I wish to scream. It was a manipulative, co-dependent, twisted disaster; NOT a romantic relationship. *shudder*

Willow/Kennedy. This is a clear symptom of the Riley-factor. With Riley the writers attemped a Not!Angel; here they attempted a Not!Tara. Neither Willow/Kennedy nor Buffy/Riley were very interesting, entertaining, romantic or had any chemistry to speak of. Get of my screan, you're boring me!

AtS:
Jas!Cordy/Connor. I cannot call it Cordy/Connor because it was not the real Cordelia. Also a case of a couple clearly not intended to be romantic. It was wrong on so many levels, and made my insides curl in pain whenever Jas!Cordy pulled her manipulations on Connor - and the silly kid falling for them. Yikes. And don't get me started on their "chess game" (tm. Strega) in Apocalypse, Nowish. Yee, gads!

Fred/Gunn. While both actors are indescribebly cute, there was just no chemistry to speak of. Also: pancake kisses - what are they, twelve? Not a fan of Wes/Fred either, but I need my list to stear away from the Jossverse.

Wes/Lilah: Now these two I enjoyed watching, they were riveting together and they sizzled the way few couples do. But romantic? Not in a million years.

Friends:
I would like to take the writer(s) who thought Rachel/Joey were a good idea and smack them silly. Sure Rachel/Ross were not great by any means, but they were very sweet at first and have more chemistry. This, was just a wreck - a bad horrible wreck.

Smallville:
Now, I don't watch this show regularly, but Clark/Lana are so vanilla and so boring on their own - put them together and it's Snoozville. Personally, I thought Clark had way more chemistry with Chloe, and Lana actually had chemistry with Lex (who has chemistry with everybody - and then there is the Clex). But no, they must be the focus. Too bad that they are Dawson/Joey irritating, only they offer even less entertainment. And on that note...

Dawson's Creek:
Dawson/Joey. *Sigh* You know, In seasons 1-2 I actually enjoyed them. But, seriously, by the end of S2 the melodrama that was these two made me dislike both characters. And the continous D/J focus in the series and "hands sex" were added bonuses that made me wish, time and time that I had stopped watching the show in S3. Still can't for the life of me figure out why I stuck with it.

The O.C..
Ryan/Marissa. The first 10 episodes or so, I was OK with them. Sure, they were a tad cliché, and a girl that fails to have chemistry with Ben McKenzie must have something seriously wrong with her, but the smolderig looks of Ryan kept my interest up. Then Oliver happened. 'Nuff said.

As much as I love Seth/Summer on The O.C., the fish sex? So not romantic. But damn funny.

Sadly, the Doug/Jack "romance" in the DC series finale really didn't work, primarily because Kerr Smith could barely keep from wiping his mouth off after kissing a guy. Dickwad.

That beats most all the craptastic fauxmances I can think of...and now I will be sick. Sick I say.

It puts Carter and Abby in the cutesy hall of fame...well almost.