I'll pass. The last time I participated in a pool, the television show Charmed was renewed.

*shudder*

Charmed was renewed?!? Wow!

I'll pass too, what if she's elected some governor? Gross!

I don't think BAM or Johnny would be interested in Nick.

Check out the article in GQ. So, now Jessica is starting to carry around paperback novels by the dozens in her purse? Anyone else think this is just to prove a point since she knew she was going to be interviewed? The same with Nick being there?
I swear, this family has always tried way too hard.

ETA:
So this, is suppossed to be one of the best-looking women out there? Hmmm.......

These have got to be the shortest legs I've ever seen. And the caption here[says "Simpson isn't the kind of pop diva who will grab her boyfriend's junk for the paparazzi or cut herself into the proceeds from her home sex video. So, even after she whored out everything from her wedding night and first 2 years of her marriage for a tv show, she's still better than everybody else. UGhh.

I kinda think saying you might try licking your husband's asshole on MTV is slightly less dignified than a sex tape.

Is that her mother behind her? My god, she looks terrible!

Ugh, she did this? I thought I watched all the Newlyweds episodes, but I don't remember this.

Not only did she do it, gotta watch, she did it in front of Drew and Leah. I want to say it was at the beginning of one of the season 2 episodes.

Is this from a recent article? Because if so, looks like they slipped up. Boyfriend huh? Guess she doesn't have a husband anymore.

And yes, I have officially read too much into this faux-rige, that I think I am starting to go insane.

I'm pretty sure it was a slam at Britney for grabbing her [then] boyfriends nuts on the hotel balcony and a slam at Paris for cutting a deal to get some of the proceeds from her sex tape.

Topic? Still can't stand her!

I love how Jessica used to bitch that the record companies thought she was too "fat" and how she had to starve herself...and now she is frickin' skin and bones and she thinks she looks great. Oy.

Yesterday while at the supermarket, I noticed the cover of Life & Times magazine (I believe that is the mag it was) and it said something to the effect of Pa Simpson says Jessica should go solo. I bet they are getting ready (finally) to announce the divorce.

Interesting....so I wonder what reason they will use for the divorce, since they have been saying all along that they are happy and everything is hunky-dory.

Unfortunately, I doubt it. Life & Times is pretty low on the magazine totem pole. Tabloids like that have been insinuating a divorce for months.

I think they'll at least stay together until Duke's of Hazard comes out.

US Weekly has some crap about Nick making Jessica cry on the cover.

All the magazines are pointing the finger at Nick being the bad guy in the relationship. The work of Papa Perv, no doubt. It's Jessica who's rumored to be doing all the screwing around, we have actual stories of her in flings. Nick has been reported trying to pick up other women but no hints that he's been successfully enganged in an affair.

I can't be the only one who thinks Jessucka's face looks particularly odd in these photos, can I?



http://gorillamask.net/jessicasimpsongq.shtml

Not just her face, ld1 .
Ugh. Those pictures do not flatter her legs at ALL! I don't think I've ever seen them look that stumpy before. And the white tank makes her look thick all over, and I know she is NOT thick at all! (except her head)
Combat boots and boy shorts are not her look...

They are ready to make an impact on the music scene again

C'mon now, did they ever?

Not just her face, ld1 .
Ugh. Those pictures do not flatter her legs at ALL! I don't think I've ever seen them look that stumpy before. And the white tank makes her look thick all over, and I know she is NOT thick at all! (except her head)
Combat boots and boy shorts are not her look...

ITA, to the extreme! Her legs look awful. Jessica is just naturally a big boned girl and no matter how much she starves herself there are going to be certain parts of her body that will stay larger than others.

I have two thoughts when I see those photos:

"I love the smell of Napalm in the morning... it smells like victory."

"Charlie don't surf!"

Jessica's impact is doing bad remakes of good songs. In fact, in that article, she says her album will be "old music with a new sound," or something to that effect. Sounds like more shitty remakes are on the way!
I can appreciate singers/bands remaking songs if they have always loved the song or it meant something to them when they were starting off in the business. Jessica just remakes songs that people tell her to. I couldn't get over in Making the Video when she said she had just heard "These Boots are Made for Walking," for the first time at a cast party for Dukes of Hazzard! I hate that she doesn't seem to appreciate music from any other time except the early 90's to now.

I think you guys meant Life & Style mag.

lifeandstylemag.com

And speaking of more crap from Jessica, here's more BS.

intouckweekly.com

Sorry to pop in here every ten pages or so with a "Why can't we all just get along," song, but... aren't Britney and Paris so much worse? Okay, they're all bad. But I believe that Jessica is smarter by a degree or two than Britney and emotionally smarter than Paris (who seems to want to have a child quite soon as an accessory).

Hey, Britney did that too! Sure, Nick can be kinda sexist on the show and Jessica is often quite ignorant and selfish, but, for example, if I was a baby (or a toy-sized dog, I guess), I'd rather have Jessica as my mommy than the others!

Is there really concrete evidence (besides the tabloids) that Nick and Jessica are in the process of a divorce? Sure, their marriage isn't likely to last forever, but why now?

Just to clarify: I do not listen to either of these people's music. I'm really not a fan, I swear. Part of me just thinks that Jessica has the right to look crappy in the airport, like every other human being, and to have a pathetic need for attention and validation, like 90% or so of human beings. She's famous enough to really carry out her pathetic cries for attention, so I just can't blame her. There's millions of other people who in the same situation as her would take the same (or worse) actions.

Well, for me, if she'd go away, I'd have no reason to mock her. It used to be if you didn't like a particular pop star, all you had to do was avoid top-40 radio stations. But she's just impossible to avoid. Every time I log on to my computer, a photo of Jessica is on front page of Yahoo. Yesterday, her face was advertising articles on how she got her knew look, because of course we all want to look as anorexic as Jessica. Every time I look at magazines, I see her vacuous eyes staring at me. Every time I turn on the Style Network, I see her saying something moronic. She's like herpes. I don't blame her; I blame her father and his deal with Satan. She suffering from extreme over-exposure, and I'd have no reason to dislike her if she'd go away. If I have to look at her 3000 times every day, then I need to come her and bash a bit. On the up side, I rarely see her talentless younger sib any more, so I'm feeling a bit of relief from the constant barrage of talentlessness and dumbness.

They get trashed, too. Jessica has earned her snark, regardless of whether someone else is more immature or unintelligent.

OT

I thought some of you would like this, as it counts down to the inevitable:

Nick and Jessica Breakup Watch

/OT

I saw the "Dukes" trailer at the movies last night, and that movie looks so bad. No one in the entire theater laughed at any of the very bad jokes. And Jessica is so horrible. I cringed!

What is all this I just saw on Best Week Ever about Nick canceling a premiere party for his shit-ass show because of "martial problems"? Do we have any further details or is this all we know?

It was in Page Six. Nick was supposed to have a party on May 17 to celebrate his reality show, but it was delayed due to "supposed" marital issues. As usual, Jessica's rep denies it all.

Is his reality show ever being released?

That Page Six story sounds like ca ca. Only because the point of the show is to promote the album or have it coincide with the album release. Since we have no godly idea when or if that will ever happen what is the point of the show.

Page Six is notorious for having incorrect stories.

She looks "special" here.

So not attractice.

I saw a bit of the rerun of Nick and Jessica: Tour of Duty last night. So bad. So very very bad. She thought it was sooooo cute that she couldn't pronounce where she was or any other city or Air Force Base in the Middle East. Isn't stupidity adorable?

Also, Spicey477, fantastic website. It's officially bookmarked, and I can't wait for her to post something new. Thanks!

I'm sure the boys in uniform don't care...not as long as they have eye-candy to go along with the supposed lack of brains.

Papa Joe will be on Inside Edition tomorrow to defend Jess' trampy video. Just thought I'd give everyone a heads-up.

Because they're double DDs, and you just can't cover those suckers up, donchaknow.

Bwahahaha! I saw this on another forum, supposed to be originally from IMDB.
She's a singing stripper."

And not a very good one at that.

I wouldn't be surprised if Jessica actually gets favorable reviews out of this movie. I think it's going to do well, even if it's a stinker critically. I'm guessing that the movie will push her that much farther into the upper eschelon of Hollywood-- much to Nick's chagrin.

Britney's gonna be sooooo jealous.

Hmm. Not very "Christian" of him to call someone a whore. What a dink.

My heart bleeds...lol



How much you wanna bet that papa is beating him to a bloody pulp right now? lol

I hate to ever be in a position to defend a conservative christian, but I don't think him saying she's whoring herself out is the same as calling her a whore, and I don't find those remarks unchristian at all. I have to agree with anyone who calls the Simpsons out on their hypocracy. Jessica can either be a role model for her fans, who are mostly eight, or she can be a sex symbol who shakes her ass in videos. I don't think she should be allowed to have it both ways.

She's not good at being a sexpot because it isn't natural for her to be that way. She's putting on a sexy act to further her career the same way she was playing super dumb to further her career before. Whatever keeps that cash flow going is what she'll do. Her whole family is depending on her to take care of them financially at this point since Asslee became a lost cause.

Does anybody else think Jessica's "sexy christrian stipper" act is as awkward as a 12 year old trying to do it? I keep thinking that she's just a kid who's still afraid of sex, even though she claims to have "done it."

Oh, that's EXACTLY IT!! It's like when you were a kid and you practiced making out with a pillow or the back of your hand, tilting your head back and forth all crazy with your mouth closed. When I watch her writhe, I don't think it's sexy at ALL, and other than that, I think she's pretty hot (except for the butthole mouth she trots out on occasion). I stare at my TV with a quizzical frown of concern on my face, like I had just looked in the mirror and discovered that I had a tiny third nostril on my nose, and just end up saying out loud:

"Stop moving so goddamned much, bitch!"


*sigh*


Sorry for scaring any children under the age of 80 with my remarks.

I hear you, Selma04. It's just that it bugs me that they say they see her as a Christian role model. Um, well then they're stupid. Move on to someone else, folks.

When's the last time Jessica was touting herself (or her parents for her) as any kind of spiritual role model? Or are they...are they?

Isn't it all just about celebrating her "doing it til she's blue in the face", now? If she were a proper Christian she'd have been pregnant a few times over by now. Isn't birth control a sin for them? But maybe she does have a lot of faith, attends church, etc. I sure don't know.

I really don't mean to piss off any faithful out there, I am not a practicing anything. I'm just saying having Jessica as a spiritual role model seems kinda silly to me, and if she's not simulating violations of the commandments in her videos - eh, don't see the problem.

I'd rather we got an apology for her "vocals" over the past few years, rather than the video.

I wish Jessica would just disappear like her sister amazingly did, and that's all I have to say about that!

I agree to an extent. But everytime I've read an interview with PervPa he talks about having been a minister and having raised his children a certain way, and yadda yadda yadda. Jessica was certainly packaged as a more wholesome alternative to sluttier popstars like Brittney and Christina. She talked about saving herself for marriage constantly. So I think the people that bought into Jessica as role model have a right to be annoyed with her. But I think your're right, they really should have rejected her as a role model two or three years ago. I guess they're a bit slow.

That would be like a beautiful dream. Sniff.