This episode was so boring. I can't believe they actually focused on the dog for the whole half hour.

I did not like that dog trainer. Especially the way she acted like she was a nursery school teacher. "Can someone tell me what the difference between these are?" Who the fuck cares, lady, this isn't Sesame Street.

I can imagine Jessica probably rubbed all those compliments in Nick's face after she left. "Nick she said I had more patience than you!" "Nick I got that dog toy question right and you didn't so see I'm smart!" I kind of wish Nick would've mowed Jessica down when he was pretending to tackle her.

I hate that Jessica seems to only want a dog because it's the "in" thing to do right now. I don't think she cares about whether or not the dog is cared for properly. "Let's just walk my miserable dog around in my LV carrier and then everyone will think I'm a hip popular star!"

According to our friend the internet:

LV collar: $215
LV leash: $205
LV dog carrier: $1340
LV total: $1760

And no, Jessucka, I don't think the fucking dog knows the difference. I'm sure she'd be just as happy in one from Big Lots.


Oh, lord. Me too. What a spectacularly stupid way to get busted. I love it!

God bless the NY Daily News.

There did an interview with Jess/Nick last night on The Insider and asked about the "persistant rumors that your marriage is in trouble". They did the usual song and dance about, "our marriage is fantastic! I guess it's just part of being famous that people keep making up lies!" Well Jess, if you didn't give us so much juicey material to work with, it wouldn't be so easy to leap to that conclusion.

What was the deal with the second trainer lady who did nothing but stand around with perma-BitchFace?

Me, too. To quote from the "How Jessica Keeps Her Man Happy" article linked earlier:


By this point, it's probably been building with Nick for about 1000 nights, and the poor bastard can't take it anymore. Yeesh.

I have a somewhat on-topic question?

How can the average non-Louis Vuitton salesperson tell whether a leather good is real LV or faux? Do they make faux doggie carriers and could Jessica have just gone to knockoff.com and gotten her pet supplies? I am just wondering if that was really friggin necessary for a DOG. And I love dogs! I guess it just pisses me off when her dog is traveling better than I am!

I have a somewhat on-topic question?

How can the average non-Louis Vuitton salesperson tell whether a leather good is real LV or faux? Do they make faux doggie carriers and could Jessica have just gone to knockoff.com and gotten her pet supplies? I am just wondering if that was really friggin necessary for a DOG. And I love dogs! I guess it just pisses me off when her dog is traveling better than I am!

I just caught this episode today, and I could not believe how Jessica treats her dog. I truly hope that the dog groomer has given Daisy a bath in the past six months- because if not, that is just NASTY. I have a 70 pound Bassett Hound and I manage to drag his fat ass into the tub every once in awhile and hose him down.

At one point, Jessica called her dog IT.

"Nick! Talk nicer to it!" Paraphrased.

When she was learning to brush her dog's teeth, the trainer had to point out that Jessica had the finger in her dog's eye!

Why did these two get a dog when Jessica can barely keep herself vertical? I can only hope that Daisy is actually a stunt dog who gets taken back to her real owners once the episode has filmed.

I'm not an LV salesperson (or owner!) but I can spot fakes from a mile away. They're usually the wrong shape, the patterns are off, and they just generally look chintzier. If you look at them up close, you can usually tell that the stitching is raggedy and the labels are not sewn on as carefully as they would be on the real thing.

A fake wouldn't do for Jessica, because as Selma pointed out, the point of LV is to show people that you dropped thousands of dollars on it. People who care enough to be impressed would recognize a fake and then that would defeat the whole show-off purpose of it.

Ah, kinda like Justin Timberlake trying to act like a tough gangsta rapper?

I caught the ep in which she was at the dentist (or something) while Nick decorated the house for Halloween. Poor Nick...

I believe she said "Be patient with it". I assumed she wasn't calling the dog it, but the training itself, or the process of training the dog.

Yeesh. In the immortal words of Grace Adler -- "I can't afford Louis Vuitton and her dog poops in it."

Is it possible to tell if Jessica giving the dogs old refridgerated chicken - and the dioherra problem - actually occured in the same day or even same week?

Or did the editors just put them together so Jessica's "I wonder what made her sick?" line was hilariously blonde?

Did anyone catch when they were talking about the movie The Notebook and Nick said it had come out that day, Jessica asked "On DVD?" How is that possible? The Notebook just came out on DVD on Tuesday of this week (the day before the ep aired). I thought there was a time lag, when would this ep have been taped?

The Notebook was released on June 25.

Yes, in theatres. But Jessica clearly said, "On DVD?" and Nick said yes and then Jess got all excited about getting it. I was confused as well, it just came out on Tuesday. Or perhaps Jessica is just stupid and didn't realize he meant in the theater and not DVD. But wait, they just had the Halloween episode so it HAD to be taped after that or around that time. I give up. I'm so lost on the time period of this show.

All I can think is that because they are wealthy, they are given advanced copies of movies for their screening room. My friend's grandfather was extremely wealthy and he used to have reels of certain films before they came out on video. I really don't know how it works now, since I haven't spoken to her since I graduated high school like five years ago, I would guess it still works the same way though. If you have a lot of money, you can pretty much do anything, but that goes without saying. We all see how Jessica and her little sis live.

Someone needs to rescue those dogs, STAT! It's really not that hard to train a dog to do their business outside, you just need to be consistent and persistent. Our dogs were both trained within a couple of months. When you see them sniffing around, you take them out, rain, snow, sleet, middle of the night. They get the message pretty quick, outside is for poopin'. Like someone else said, rubbing their noses and yelloing at them hours after the fact will have no effect. When Jessucka said to spank it, I wanted to slap her. I'm sure that her pet is just another bauble to her and she doesn't care enough to really train her dogs. I suspect the dog trainers were brought in for the cameras. And, feeding them that leftover crap. What an idiot.

You know what I don't get? Nick. He seems (I know this is hardly original; everyone says it) so great. Such a perfect guy. Funny, devoted to his brother, down to earth, and beautifully, heart-meltingly polite to kids and fans.

And all those good qualities? Just make me loathe him more. Because what the hell?

Let's say you have the most wonderful woman in the world. Modest and caring and genuine and spunky but not self-consciously so, and strong. Just kickass. A cool lady.

And then let's say she was madly in love with ... I don't know, David Dukes. Or Kenneth Lay. Or Tucker Carlson. Whatever, you get the point. And she cried on her wedding day, the bliss of finding this beautiful human being! and she kissed and hugged him whenever she could. And she defended him to the world. And swore his superiority to all the guys out there, even ones with actual substance, and declared her eternal love again and again.

That hypothetical may have overstated it, but still.... I just don't get it. Ever since the episode when she, who never picked up her underwear in her life, was appalled that the maid left dust under the phone. I mean, at least Paris Hilton has some kitsch value (and is kind enough to offer herself up as an easy target). But he has yoked his life and heart to this walking, breathing symbol of America's screwed-up value system. So that makes him, the "real one," almost worse. IMHO, anyway.

Yeah, I'm starting to feel the same way, Cherry. If Nick is really as great as we think he is (or want him to be) what is he doing with her? And the allegations of him cheating, if they are true, don't help. I could understand him leaving her. But cheating on your wife, even if she's as loathsome as Jess, does NOT make you the better person. At least imho.

(In my fantasy world, I would be willing to date Nick if he left/divorced Jessica. But not if he was still married to her. Of course, I also wear a size 2 in this world, so, you know, whatever...)

The Notebook DVD was supposed to be released then, but it got pushed back

I dunno, lately it seems that every episode has Nick being nice, and Jessica constantly pouting and bitching at poor Nick.

This from the couple who wrote a book on how to keep a marriage alive?

Seriously, if Jessica and Nick were two average middle class people married to each other, she would not get away with that shit. I know I wouldn't put up with someone who constantly whined and complained to me.

I feel sorry for Nick, though. It's brutally hard to call an end to a marriage in any circumstance....must be more so when the pressure in ON constantly. I lived with a worthless loser of a husband for 14 years because I didn't want to be a quitter and kept thinking I could eventually fix him. I was wrong. Here's hoping Nick figures that out before he's raising his kids alone....(not for long, cause there's thousands ready to help him out.)

Wow...so I only now got to see the latest episode, and Nick's discontent is painfully obvious. I'm quite passive-agressive myself, so I know it when I see it.

I'm sorry about your situation, jarja grl, and I will concede that Nick is in a tight spot, so it isn't unreasonable for him to be staying in the hope that SOMEthing will change. But I still hope he isn't cheating on her. Not for HER sake, mind you, but because it would mean that Nick isn't entirely wonderful. But then, I don't know much about the Hollywood/ rock 'n roll lifestyle - maybe infidelity isn't as bad in those circles as it is to the rest of us?

A bit off-topic, but Christina Aguilera just got engaged this weekend to Jordan Bratman! Some people are already saying that they want them to do a Newlyweds-type show. I highly doubt that will happen since Christina doesn't like reality shows. Anyways, think Jessica is bothered by another popstar getting married (and it not be considered a joke) and potentially taking the spotlight from her marriage?

What bugged me about a recent show was how inhospitable Jessica seemed to be toward her inlaws. Considering what Nick has put up with on an almost daily basis, Jessica could have done something to help Nick and his dad enjoy their sports time without being so childish. Instead of making some good snack foods and serving them nicely, she seemed to pout and actually said, "I'm not going to serve you!" Then she made a point of being irritating while the game was on. Geez, way to treat your man, Jessica. So much for how to be "happily" married.

Wow. I really don't read the nice guy thing from Nick. Yes, Jessica is spoiled and ditzy, but that doesn't give Nick the right to say the things he does to her. That ball game was painful. Here Jessica was trying to talk to Nick and his mom and be involved (rather than just a quiet servant of snacks) and Nick brushes her off with dismissive and sexist comments about how she should go into the other room and watch "Lifetime". He's also mentioned in the past that talking to her was like talking to a wall and has made cracks about her reasoning skills in the past. He knew who he was getting married to, there's no excuse for not having her back and making rude and dismissive comments about her.

Watching his favorite teams play sports is something Nick obviously enjoys very much, as we've seen him do it manyyy times on the show. And everytime, Jess acts like a miserable bitch. She pouts and moans and mutters about how she's not being catered to. Leave the man alone and let him watch his game, woman! (Btw, I am a girl).

I think we as viewers can safely say that the Jessica from season one is quite different from Jessica now. She wasn't nearly as bad back then, therefore he wasn't getting into THAT bad of a situation. And I don't think brushing her off during a game is horrible. It's a weekly thing, and she obviously knew about that before they got married - he's obviously a hardcore fan. I don't think it's too much to ask to shut up for 3/4 hours while he cheers his team on.

That, and she was ragging on him about wearing USC clothes and several other things. In general she was just being an annoying mosquito buzzing around his ear. It's one thing to try and interact with your SO while they're doing something they really enjoy, it's another to insult them over and over again for loving it and then pouting when you get called on it.

My recall is a little hazy but didn't she call Nick a dork, and then Nick's dad let out a grunt as if to say, "Watch it, missy, you're about to draw back a bloody nub." That made me laugh (if it really did happen. If it didn't, it still made me laugh in my little short-term world).

Tuesday Feb 15th on CBS the Dr. Phil primetime special: Romance Rescue will feature Nick and Jessica once again defending their perfect marriage.

Is that the same show that will have The Amazing Race's Jonathon and Victoria on it? If so, then the whole thing has reached a whole new level of ridiculous.

She actually told the dog, "Come on Daisy, let's annoy daddy while he's watching the game."
I'd have kicked her ass out too.

I completely agree with this. The Jessica that he married was a fading pop star with a smile. They probably both had plans of living off their savings in their big house. They actually looked to be off to a good start. Next thing you know, they strike lightening with their show and are catapulted into solid B-list celebs. IMO, much of Jessica's behavior is due to their recent celeb status. So in fairness, Nick didn't entirely know what he was marrying. I suspect part of him is holding out for all the cameras, magazines, rumors, parents, etc to be over so they can get back to the path they started.

Britney Spears also won a Grammy last night. Ha! That's got to be kick in the teeth to Jess and Joe "I'm almost guaranteeing Jessica's Angel will win a Grammy" Simpson.

Well a dog is an it. No big deal. She has said and done far worse things.

Actually, it's a her.

A dog is no more an "it" than a child is.

I don't get the Nick love at all. I am not a fan of Jessica and agree that she is different now than back in Season 1. But he is a collossal jackass. He might have better manners and show a willingness to get off his ass and do some things for himself from time to time (such as moving furniture, etc.), but he is completely immature and he grates on my every nerve. I think those two deserve each other. He is no better than she is. If he wanted out, he'd get out. I think he likes their dysfunctional relationship just the way it is and will be happy to make jabs at Jessica for the rest of their lives together.

No, she got a 3 year old to do it. Real mature....

If I was married to Nick, I'd watch the sports with him every now and then, and when I didn't feel like it, I go do something else. And I wouldn't have a problem getting him a snack or a beer every now and then. I mean, she gets to see him naked!!!!! Dayum girl, get your head out of your ass for christsakes!!!

Well, she's been fixed. ;)

I think the Lacheys' contract with MTV and who knows who else is what's keeping them together at this point. Had they not done the show in the first place, they might have made it, but I really think they're going to reach the breaking point soon.

I totally agree with this, and yet, Nick isn't the same guy she married either. And I don't mean that he has more bling. When the show started, he seemed to have more patience with Jessica and to be more "in love" with her. Even if he chided her, it usually had a tone of amusement, as if he thought she was cute and figured she's outgrow her behavior.

Now he makes sharp and sarcastic comments almost as a matter of course. If they are going to be on the Dr. Phil special, I hope to heaven that Dr. Phil doesn't fall for their "our marriage is great!" bullshit. They can talk all they want about editing and tabloids, but this stuff isn't manufactured out of nothing. If he's any sort of therapist, he will point out to them that the couple seen on their show is a couple that is disconnected, rude to one another, and heading for divorce.

Word. He's about three IQ points smarter than she is, and he invests each of them in condescending to her and being smug. Self-satisfaction wrapped in hair gel - how appealing.

If it were me, since I don't like sports, I wouldn't watch sports with him. But I would certainly find something to do. I think couples should do things together and have interests that they don't necessarily both like and don't do together. Her problem is she's an empty shell of a human being and has no interests of her own. And I can't condone bringing him snacks and such while he's watching sports. This isn't the 1950s after all.

Hee. I thought I was the only one, but I don't find Nick attractive, and it's largely due to him trying way too hard to be hot, I think. I loathe his hair; it's so fussy and prissy along with product laden. But I hate Ashlee's fake boyfriend's hair worse.

What I've noticed from my not-entirely-idyllic-but-not-yet-over marriage is that it's a 2-way street. The less respect Jessica shows Nick, the less he shows her. From what we've been shown on the program, he was a lot more patient with her at first, but she's just gotten ruder and her behavior has gone from cluelessly rude to just plain intentionally rude. What's the motivation for him to act any differently? I'm not saying he's a prince, but she is really horrible. It's like she's proud of it.

That's why I love these boards. Sometimes posters will just tweak my perspective with a phrase and something that was confusing to me becomes a little bit more clear.

Here, the phrase was the brilliant:

Hee!!! I was, as evidenced by my posts on the subject, maddeningly confused about the Nick thing. Because he seemed so perfect to me. (I could never fault him for the snipes at Jess -- in my opinion, he gives her the least of what she deserves. I'd give her such a tongue lashing, he'd look like Gandhi by comparison.)

So I never got his "uxory" (there's an SAT word for ya!). Why did he marry her? Why does he stay?? Why does he write her lovey-dovey cards?

But then you think about it: What would he do with a girl who could volley back and forth with him, conversationally? Who didn't need him to define words, who knew that a male ballerina is not, in point of fact, a "ballerino"?

Would he be threatened? Feel like less of a man? Miss the dynamic that has him comparatively smelling like a rose?

Even the relationship with Drew that I'd always found so adorable (and quadrupled both of their sex appeals) -- Drew is the "kid brother" age-wise. He is 3 inches shorter. He is less famous, the "back-up singer."

Remember that joke in Fiji, when the woman was outfitting them with male sarongs and he said, about Drew: "Do you have any in little girls' sizes?"

Adorable (and quite funny) brotherly ribbing, yes. But note who is the alpha male in the dynamic. Maybe he's a guy who needs that.

Maybe he aint so great as I've been thinking..............

No! Say it ain't so...we're turning on Nick now? Don't diminish the Nick love! It's the one redeeming thing we have about this television show.

Damn CPS and his lack of publicity bullshit about Jessica. Now we're forced to analyze Nick. Can't he just be pretty and perfect? Please?

I don't think it's a matter of her being a 1950's housewife if she brings him a snack now and then while he's watching the game. And especially if, as another poster pointed out, they have guests (namely his parents) over to watch it with them. I mean, she's hanging all over him and being annoying because she's bored and wants his attention, why not get it in a positive way by doing something NICE for him instead? But since that would involve some modicum of effort used on someone other than herself, I'm not expecting to see that anytime soon.



Yeah, I can see that. It's kind of like the 'non-famewhore' on a reality TV show. You watch them every week thinking how great they are for not mugging to the cameras and needing tons of attention like their roommates/fellow contestants and then it dawns on you...they voluntarily went on a reality TV show too or you wouldn't be able to sit and watch them *seem* non-famewhory!

I always think Nick is great to watch on the show and he seems infinitely superior to Jessica but his relationship with her is the major chink in his armor.

Check out these bastards on this shitty magazine!!

intouchweekly.com



Would these 2 worthless bastards hurry up & get a divorce already!!!

Where is a guillotine when you need one for these 2 bastards & Ashlee, too!!!

I was off work on Friday of last week and yesterday too and MTV here in Ireland is having Newlyweds marathons to beat the band at the moment as the new series is starting on Wednesday. I've seen (like many others) huge changes in the state of the Lachey Simpson marriage over the episodes I've been watching. At the start they were on more of a level pegging status wise. Jessica was still very spoiled but I don't think it had started to bug Nick as much as it does now. She seemed to turn to him for help and advice in a way that made him feel good about himself and he treated her like a little pet. Now she turns to her dad all of the time and it seems to be that she has become much more of an annoyance to Nick, the whole come live with me to know me thing. While Nick is much more of a "real" person than Jessica( has basic life skills, good manners, is knowlegable etc) he is also coming across as a smug person more often. Maybe he is sticking with Jessica because she makes him feel good about himself as far as intellect goes anyway. BUT Oh my God does that girl believe that the world revolves around her or what? To me the key to any happy marriage or relationship is love, respect and compromise. I think she loves the fact that Nick is attractive to other women and he is "hers" rather than actually loving HIM for himself. She has little or not time for his work in and around the house, his hobbies or interests and always speaks in a derisory manner about anything he tries. The only member of his family she tolerates is Drew and given that her parents are all but living with them (and if he had his way her pervy dad would probably sleep betweeen them) I think she should give a little space and welcome his family.

I dunno, it seems like all they do now is live together and spend obnoxious amounts of money on themselves, each other, and now their dog. It's like How To Live Like A Star 101.

Everything from jetting off to quickie vacations, eating at fancy restaurants, getting the purse dog - it's all been done! And done better, I might add.

Why does Nick stay with Jessica? He finally found someone that makes him feel brilliant, and relies on him for every little thing. Jessica has Daisy, Nick has Jessica.

Awesome!

I just have to add that watching this season so far has been painful. The past season(s?) were fun and light-hearted. But this season I have been uncomfortable watching them bicker, not in a fun way at all, but with obvious resentment and distaste for one another.