I do.

Awesome.

What really struck me about the birthday special was how Nick said that missing Jessica's birthday was the most horrible thing that's ever happened to him. Life must be pretty swell if that's the worst thing he's even been through. What about the day he married into Creepypasimpson's family? That would have me rocking back and forth in the shower.

Joe is not Nick's manager...thank the lord!

Thank you for posting what I've been thinking vaguely for the past two seasons, but couldn't put my finger on. I remember being bothered by a comment Nick made saying he overachieved when he married Jessica because she is so gorgeous. If that's his value system when it comes to women, he deserves what he got. Every time he sneers when Jessica talks, my opinion of him drops all the more. I don't think he treats her well at all. Now that I'm thinking about Nick's behavior toward Jessica, is he really that much different from her parents? Only interested in her image. When she doesn't uphold that image of the beautiful doll, he gives her disapproval. I think Jessica is trying very hard to love herself as a real person apart from that image hence all the burping and farting references. Nick's attitude seems to be insistent on the maintenance of that perfect beautiful facade--sit over there don't speak just look nice for me so that other guys see what a stud I am for getting this great trophy wife. He doesn't seem to want to relate to her like a real person just like her parents are just interested in her as a money making machine.

Word to the previous two posts. Nick lost me in one of the first episodes of the first season when he was talking about his three-year plan to turn Jessica into a "good wife." Ass.

Some tidbits from a Washington Post review of Jessica's Christmas album:

"Simpson has a big voice but doesn't know how to use it"
"overly busy, overblown arrangements or saccharine string settings"
"vocal showboating on overexposd standards"

Somebody get this girl some new management.

I don't have any sympathy for either one of them. Sure, Nick is quite the "good ole boy" and appears to be quite misogynistic, but good (DIETY), look at what he married! A vapid, self-centered, Daddy's girl who really does expect the world on a platter.

They're made for each other, but I feel just slightly more sorry for Nick, because he seems more capable of rational thought, to a small degree.

maybe the reason why he says he overachieved due to her looks because thats all she has going for her, if he said he was lucky because he got an intelligent, unselfish, thoughful wife he would be telling more lies that president Bush.

hm I just defending Nick...shoot me!

He also seems like a much nicer person. Of course, you never know how "celebrities" really behave when the cameras are turned off, but he comes across as much less spoiled and arrogant as his wife. He's always quite well mannered and considerate when dealing with limo drivers, waiters, gardeners, etc. It comes across as genuine and probably stems from the fact that he had a much more normal and less pampered childhood that Jessica. His brother, Drew, seems the same way. They might not be sensitive New Age males, but their parents do seem to have drilled some basic manners and respect for others into them.

Being in the restaurant industry, I've seen celebrities far less famous than Nick behave like total asswipes and treat the "little people" around them like dirt. Take me out for a drink sometime and I'll tell you stories about Wilfred Brimley that'll curl your hair.

My husband used to be a chef in Las Vegas and he said that Wilford Brimley and Andre Agassi were the biggest as*holes he has ever come across in his 30 years of restaurant experience.


Topic: I also like how Nick seems to be genuinely interested in helping around the house and stuff. Like when he and Drew were going to sod the front yard by themselves, or the fact that he actually seems to pick up after himself and does laundry and wipes the counters clean, etc.

However, he knew what he was getting himself into by marrying this dolt, so, "No Pity for you! Next!"

THAT does not surprise me at all.

Ot:Molly Ringwald is the same way. My mom was sitting next to her at a restaurant and her waiter(Molly's) very innocently said what a fan he was and how much her movies meant to him. She promptly got up, said something to the manager and left, food on the table and everything, didnt pay or tip. Just because he said he was a fan and gave her a very nice compliment. Thats not the only thing I've heard about her, but I know the one from my mom is true, I dont know if the others are.

Topic:I like Nick. I wasnt offended by his five year plan comment, I think he was being a bit naive, since women cant change their husbands, what made him think that he could change his wife? I think he should have waited a bit longer to see how things went, but she probably wouldnt have lived with him first which was what he needed to do. He needed to see what the "real Jessica" was like and then run like hell. By "real Jessica" I mean, parental involvement, immaturity, disgusting living and I'm sure hygene habits (why do all these girls with so much money have such poor hygene?) etc. You dont get that information without living with someone and in this day and age, where women arent brought up being taught home economics and pleasing your man(like Nick seems to want), you may get a Jessica and not a stepford wife.

EW gave ReJoyce a D-. Thank goodness Christmas albums only have a limited shelf life.

Newlyweds Season 1 came out on DVD yesterday! I am soooooo buying it. For some reason I love this show...I think it is for the same reason I love Laguna Beach...total pleasure at watching other people make fools of themselves on television.

This is from Page 6 (gossip page). Sometimes I wish CreePa SIMPson would just disappear.
What are the chances that he'll urge ASSlee to marry His other client, Ryan Cabrera, so that they can do Newlyweds 2?

Tina Simpson must cry into her $1,000 pillow every night, being married to that slimy creep. The man has no filter between his brain and his mouth, and for the love of all that is holy, I wish he would develop one because most of what he says makes me want to scrub down with bleach.

My god... My dad never mentions my chest, nor does he want to think about them. He also wouldn't call me sexy. Beautiful, yes, cause all dads call thier daughters beautiful or pretty. Sexy is just gross.

From the quote Chocolate Cherry posted:

That tells you something right there about his famewhoring ways. "When we're done..." Shouldn't that say "when she's done"? But of course a Simpson isn't complete without her daddy.

My gawd, I heard that on the G-Block last night and couldn't believe my ears! I am incredulous that this guy used to be a Baptist preacher.

From The Cincinnatti Post:



I haven't heard the album, but I heard the Simpson Family Christmas special, and it was quite alarming. I agree with the review that Nick's voice is pleasant. I actually saw Jessica in concert and was very impressed with the power of her voice...she just sings through her nose too much, as does Ashlee (only with her it is about ten times worse).

Great point Jessba! He is so entrenched in her life, I doubt she can ever transition to independence. It's sad really.

I also wonder if he knows what he says is wrong, but says it anyway for shock value and whatever publicity it brings. Or if he thinks that's the way normal fathers talk about their daughters. Hmmmm. Actually either way is quite sad too.

I'll take "Bearing False Witness" for $200, Alex.

I mean, we are talking about the same Jessica Simpson who wears stilletto heels with her swimsuit while walking around the pool, right?

Because I'm bored today, I've been reading this thread all day. I'd heard about this quote before but this:



Is so sickening. He called her breasts SUCKERS. I wouldn't put it past his creepy ass to know just what that feels like.

Oh. my. God. What a loathsome little shit of a man.

Almost enough to make me feel sorry for Jessucka, except she is too stupid to fire his ass.

Sweet jeebus, my father would sooner douse himself with gasoline and then set himself on fire than discuss my ladybits with the national media.

Exactly! And that's why I'm so surprised he's not being called out more by the media. We all see it here, why doesn't everyone else?

I keep thinking of the episode where the girls were outside sunbathing topless and PervyPa walked in on them and Lynn said it must be his lucky day. That's just wrong....


ETA: That wasn't intentional, Hailey, (d'oh!) but I like it and I think I'll leave it. Those two are hard to tell apart anyways ;)

If that was intentional, Kharma, it was pretty damn funny!

I was just wondering that this week. If Jessica noticed that "dumb sells" and was obviously playing dumb second season, then maybe Pa noticed that people talk when he mentions her boobs, and is going there to increase his/their celebrity. It's possible!

Gah! Please pass the industrial-sized bucket o' brain-bleach, please.

As I was flipping through the channels I stopped on MTV during their xmas special. It was the part where 98 degrees was singing. You know, they were and are really talented, I am not sure why Nick isnt doing well. He has a very nice voice.

A nice voice? Voice?? Puhlease! I refuse to pay him a dime of attention until he twirls and prances around my TV in choreographed moves while lip-synching over a hot-as-fyah Neptunes beat!! Refuse! [/sarcasm]

Justin has changed life as we know it. For the worse, that is.

Heh. I'm still living in the late 80's/early 90's I guess when talent was a key factor in people's successes. Sorry 'bout that!

I did notice that he has resisted her spazzing ways when he sings, thankfully.

I saw him, I think it was on Letterman, when he was promoting his first solo album. He had absolutely no stage presences or charisma. He just stood there and sang, and maybe shimmied a little. I didn't even notice his voice because I was stunned by his wooden performance. Of course, on a lot of those shows, the sound is really bad anyway.

I never heard of 98 Degrees until Newlyweds, but I'm assuming they were like other boy bands, and there was a lot of choreography. Without that, he's just deadly boring. I hope his promoters have some new ideas. Maybe he could be more like a band front man rather than a crooner.

Speak of DaddyPerv, I hate to say anything nice about the man, but I'm stunned by his management skills. Ashley is still everywhere. She's got some New Year's Eve hosting gig, and she's on every single award show or other music-related special. She may be a laughing stock, but girl is still getting paid.

And, I'm sorry, but I can't believe Jessica is not trying to be sexy. Every time I see a photo of her, she's got the same porno post with the hand on hip, arched back, pouty lips. DaddyPerv is either a liar or in denial, but I don't really want to know which.

DaddyPerv's quote was in US magazine's soundbites of 2004. He should be ashamed of himself.

I knew of 98 degrees a little during their "big" years but I was too busy loving the BAckstreet Boys and hating Nsync to really pay any attention. I don't think they did too much of the choreography thing, it was definitely more or a vocal group than a bunch of dancers.

Don't feel bad. Until I saw Newlyweds, I thought 98 degrees was the boy band that the cast of RR..... (or was it RW) had to beat in a sailing competition.

I desperately hated NKOTB in Jr High when all of my friends were in love with them, so I have a predispostion to boy band hate. Thus my ignorance. :/

Poor, poor, poor Nick. I really kind of like him, even though he seems nearly as vapid as Jess, and a wee bit misogynistic as well. He and Drew seem like decent guys, though.

As for CreepySimpsonClan...... I wish they would disappear off my TV forever.

My Tivo recorded some Newlyweds reruns this week and today I watched the Christmas episode. Remember how bitchy Jessica was when Nick played a Christmas song he had just recorded? And she just laughed in his face about it and you could tell he was hurt. well anyway, I thought it was interesting that she said "That's why I didn't do a Christmas album." Well 1 year later and look where we are! You did do a Christmas album you dumb manly looking bitch, and it sucks. Hate.

Because of Jessica Simpson thousands of people will no longer know how to spell "Rejoice" and that is really sad. If I can't remember how to spell something I search the dark regions of my brain and try to remember where I saw the word printed. I'm sure I'm not alone and now thousands of people will spell the word "Rejoyce" because they don't immediately realize that it's incorrect. I'm all for honoring grandparents, but GAH!

Oh, it's even more ludacris than that. They'll be spelling it "Re-Joyce".

My wish for the new year is that the "Dukes of Hazard" movie and Asshat's "tour" both bomb embarassingly enough that the entire Simpsons clan will slink away to whatever hole they all came from. Pa Simp is a wretched excuse of a human being and shame on the recording industry for continuing to provide employment opportunities for this ass.

What the fuck happened to the days when silly pop stars had their place (Tiffany, Leif Garrett, De Franco Family, et al.) and weren't mega-millionaires toting Vuitton and wearing haute couture? Oy!

Front page of some magazine at the check out line today had a photo of Nick and Jessica with the subtitle - "Nick says it's time for a baby!"

Well, if Britney can do it...

Hee! Ah, that's funny.

I saw about 2 seconds of Jessica acting during their Christmas special. It's amazing that anyone would hire her for a movie. She was awful.

I was thinking about that today while watching her Pro-active commercial. Her whole career is based entirely on marketing. She has the looks to be a spokesperson and can feign some talent thereby giving the illusion of being an entertainer. PaPerv sold her soul to the king devil of marketing (MTV) and the family gained the rights to endorsement deals, shitty movies, etc.

The casting directors of "Dukes" are knowingly putting ass-clowns in the movie, because ass-clowns like Jessica sell tickets. No talent is involved whatsoever.

I don't remember "The Dukes of Hazzard" very well, but I always believed it to be a pretty cheesy show. I'm probably in the minority here, but I think that the casting directors did make the right decision in not casting actual actors because that would have kind of undermined the notion and mood of this flick. I'm not saying that the Simp is the best Daisy they could have find, but a serious actress wouldn't work in this movie, IMO. On the contrary, we all should be thankful that it isn't Mrs. Federline or Ms. Hilton who will grace us with her acting genius instead...

ITA - but she's still an ass-clown.

There's got to be something between a serious actress and a woman (Jessica) who causes the audience to cringe every time she says a line.

I think Carmen Electra would have made a great Daisy Duke. Jessica is a joke, and stinks up anything she attempts to act in. Not that I was going to see the movie anyway, but she would be enough to keep me away even if I was interested.

Hee! You mean like Johnny Knoxville?

At the gym the other day VH1 was playing some Jessica Simpson Driven show, and I swear, her mom and dad (ew) spent 10 minutes talking about her boobs. It's a wonder she thinks there is anything more to her than just her boobs. Oh, wait....

True. Jessucka is a boob in every sense of the word.

Agreed. She is also a brunette, which would have made sense. Carmen Electra is not annoying and seems to know the limitations of her talents which makes her fun to watch. I really never want to see this film, however, the new season of Newlyweds will bring more snark. I hate perpetuating their fame though. Luckily, I am not in MTV's target segment so they won't care if I watch or not.

And didn't Nick name his first solo album "Soulo" or something like that? I mean I like Nick as much as the next person and everything but...no.