The thing with the cheating reports is that most of the time rags like the Star and the Enquirer end up being right--it just takes a couple of weeks for the truth to come out elsewhere. So in some ways I don't doubt the cheating reports.

And isn't it funny that they pronounce how great their marriage is when they have things coming up to promote--the Christmas special and Newlyweds? Hmmm...Jennifer Lopez always seemed to time her engagements and marriages to when she had something to promote as well.

Lastly, I have to say it still bugs me when Jessica insists that all marriages have arguments. Now, I will agree that couples do disagree, but I can assure you that many couples do not argue or disagree nearly as much as they do. Not only that, many married couples enjoy being together, and the husband does not have a pained look on his face like Nick does everytime they are together.

She can act like her marriage is the best, but it is wrong to make assumptions that all marriages are just like hers. Most are actually better. So there Jessica! :-)

Some couples do bicker a lot, and it's usually when two strong-willed people marry each other. So I don't really have any issues with their bickering.

What I do have an issue with is how they're both completely unable to express their feelings in a nice way. Nick was such a twerp to Jessica's friend (Cacee?). How hard is it to just say, "You know, we're glad we could help you get started in LA, but you really need to find your own apartment. You have until the end of the month, then you'll have to move out." Instead, he drops all these asshatty hints all over the place and treats the poor girl, who is new in town and doesn't have friends, like total trash. I would strangle my husband if he talked to one of my friends like that!

And Jessica deals with her issues by pouting or having tantrums. It's like two snotty 13-year-olds married each other.

Another season? Kill me now.

I agree--I don't actually have a problem with bickering either--as it does happen. I just don't like when Jessica uses her marriage as an example for all marriages. The examples you gave of some of the things they do are exactly why I don't like it when Jessica professes how great their marriage is and at the same time compares it to other marriages.

Especially since they are still "newlyweds". It is not like they are experts at marriage or anything.

Didnt a while back she try to get a book deal on how to have a successful marriage?

I cant believe the arrogance of this girl.

Oh, it gets worse. She's going to have a clothing line, coming to a JC Penny's near you. But, she's also being sued over Dessert by the company that actually produced the product. In her defence, Jessica proclaims what we already knew, she doesn't actually have anything to do with it.



And what stupid people are nominating her for People's Choice Awards. Don't they know she'll never go away at this rate?

From the link:






Oh god! Say it aint so!

Who are these "People" anyway? Why don't they call it the 12-year Olds' Choice Awards or, better yet, the Lowest Common Denominater Awards? Or even the Just Give Beyonce and Usher All of the Damn Trophies So We Can All Go Home Already Awards?

I love that she's "designing" a line of shoes. How many times did we see her on her show gimping around in ridiculous shoes she couldn't walk in? Now 10-year old girls everywhere can totter around whining and wincing with every step.

New pics of the Christmas special, for us to snark on.

There's a pretty good shot of Nick's watch in one of them and it doesn't look like that blinged-out fugly crap she bought him for his birthday.

Did you all see the previews for the Nick's birthday surprise for Jessica special? I just had to groan out loud when I saw that. When will they go away? And I just have to note that Jessica made the ugliest face ever in the preview clip when Nick surprised her at some show she was singing at. Heh.

Wait. Is that a shot of Jessica pimping her Dessert cosmetics on the show?

Looks like the puppy will be the only tolerable thing on the show. Poor thing. I hope they don't make him go live with Nick and Jessica. I don't think I can take a whole new season of Newlyweds worrying about the safety and happiness of a cute puppy. Although footage of him taking advantage of the fact that Jessica shuns hangers would be awesome.

Why do they make Jessica look all glam and Nick is just in regular sweaters and stuff?

That puppy was beyond adorable. A Louis Vuitton doggy bag? How much Louis Vuitton does Jessica need? Does she get anything else for her birthdays?

I watched the special "Jessica's Birthday" and I thought that it was nice of Nick to get her that tiny useless dog that will be her "responsibility." I also think he will end up taking care of the dog because once Jessica gets bored of it, and she will, he's going to end up taking care of it and if he wants to get a bigger dog for himself like he wants she will pout and rail against it because it will be taking attention from her dog. The body language was so very telling when he came out with that mutt though she is not at all exicted by his being there as much as the dog, she cuddles the dog I don't think she even kissed him hello or anything when she'd been whining in that very country way of hers that she "missed her honey."

I recently saw the birthday special as well, and I agree, Ms. Moon. Jess didn't look as excited to see Nick as I thought she would be. I just to had to laugh when Nick was singing "My Everything" and then he went over to sit next to her but she was in her own little world of tiny nail-polished puppies. The pup was too cute, though. I want it.

Maybe I'm not that into designer labels as Jessica (though I would like some Louis one day), but I just wouldn't get that excited over a suitcase. No matter what designer slaps his/her name on it. It's a suitcase. I could see if it was a purse or a wallet, but it was a suitcase. A suitcase isn't really a birthday present to me, it's more of something you shop for on any regular day.

I'm surprised they only showed her getting the suitcase. You would think they would shoe her getting spoiled with presents if she got anymore.

I do understand getting the suitcase as a bday present. She travels a lot and likes Louis Vuitton. So a $2,000+ suitcase is a big deal. I wouldn't want that suitcase because I don't go anywhere.

I can't believe that Nick told Jessica he was held up by a tornado, and no one tought to turn on the Weather Channel to see what the severity of the tornado was. These people are just so shallow and self-absorbed.



On the other hand, wouldn't it be nice if your loved-ones were so simple-minded that you could just buy them any piece of crap with a particular designer name on it, and they'd be happy. There's so little thought that needs to go into gift buying. Thinking of the upcoming holidays, I'm a little jealous.

I thought Jessica seemed happier about the LV doggie carrier than about the actual dog. That dog is nothing but a fashion accessory to her. And since we've seen the way she disregards her clothes and throws them all other the floor, I pity that poor little thing.

I'm no expert on useless status items, but I think LV bags run in the thousands of dollars and the suitcases in the tens of thousands of dollars. Someone correct me if I'm wrong.

They said that it was the biggest one, so that would be the Pegase 70, which is $2,260.

What I didn't get about that whole thing was that everybody was like, "A tornado? In Minnesota?" like it was such a crazy concept. Do they think that ONLY Texas gets tornadoes? Idiots.

Although it probably wasn't, that's the exact reason that I thought that Jessica was in on the whole thing. I mean she was already voicing her suspicions that he was lying. She is not so much of a dimwit that she wouldn't tell Mommy dearest to call and find out the weather - or call the airport itself.

And how covenient was one of the questions: "What do you want most for your birthday?" And her answer was a very convenient "My husband and a puppy."

Sure she cried and all, but I think that the whole thing was a bit too suspect.

These two are just doomed. Poor Nick is going to have to top himself every year with cute surprises. He's set a bad "fairy-tale" precedent that Jessica will undoubtedly expect for the next 5-10 years...and which Nick won't be able to (and quickly won't want to) maintain.

He just screwed himself by catering to MTV and their idiotic scripts.

Has anyone seen the new Star/US Weekly/similar magazine that has Jess on the cover? I don't remember the headline, but the subheading says something to the effect of, "Jessica is living two thousand miles away from Nick after the stripper debaucle, will she be able to make it on her own?" I'm not really sure what their point is, but I was trying to look at without other people knowing I was looking at, so it's hard to tell. My suspicion is that it's some overblown reaction to Nick's supposed cheating, like she just happens to be in NY working on an album or something and the mag is wondering, what if the rest of her life were like this? But I'm hoping it's juicier than that. Does anyone know the deal?

I think you're right, because the whole thing was just so stupid. And Jessica's not that good of an actress.

I saw some coming attractions for a Nick appearances on Hope and Faith. Did anybody catch that? I kind of want to catch him on one of these shows to see if he can actually act. I thought his "acting" on the variety special was really embarrassing. But I watched that show once and I felt like my IQ was dropping so I quickly changed the channel. Anyone?

Yes, the story was that Jessucka is shooting Dukes of Hazzard for four months in Baton Rouge (where she's renting a house that's plenty roomy) while he at the time was off to New York to see his brother and shoot an episode for Hope & Faith. So it basically made a big deal of nothing, because I'm sure he can/will fly down to Red Stick to see her occasionally, and that he wouldn't be in New York for the full four months.

US started the story off with tales of how they were cool to each other during the three-day birthday party she threw him in Las Vegas (he looked bummed and alone at the bar, they were only lovey-dovey for the cameras, etc).

Enough to catch up with Kimora Lee Simmons?

Hee. Hee hee hee. Probably not true, but hee.

The horror... the horror... Nick & Jessica's Christmas Emetic has infested my television screen, and before I retire to a nice dark closet to weep and retch, I thought I would just post this as a warning to others. Don't worry, no spoilers. I'm not sure if the term "spoiling" is really applicable in this context.

Wow....Just..wow. I thought the first "Special" was bad... This one (the Christmas one) made the hair on the back of my neck stand up. I was embarrased for Nick, Drew, Nick's family, the rest of 98 Degrees, ABC, The United States...even the Simpson Family. Ack. I'm still stunned. And I NEVER want to be subjected to a "duet" between Jess and Ash again. <Shudder>

There's a thread for the Christmas special in the Popcult forum if y'all want to increase the snark.

oops...moving the snark to a better location!

Just read on E!Online that a third season of Newlyweds has been confirmed along with a new season of Ashlee's show and a solo show for Nick. Ok, I thought they were done with Newlyweds? Did Joe realize his money was running out faster than he thought?

Oh yes it is true. Let me add that Nick and Jessica say this will be their last season.

(yeah right, like we didn't hear that last season!)

I heard on the radio this morning that Nick's show is going to be called "The Nick Lachey Project", and it will focus primarily on him. I know a lot of Newlywed viewers have said that they would not mind a show featuring just Nick, so here you go. Really no details yet on what it is going to be about.

I would also like to add that Jessica is blonde in the new Dukes of Hazzard movie. *sigh*

Wait. So Nick will be on Newlyweds and a new show? Not at the same time, I hope. I mean, I like Nick and all, but that's just over kill.

Hasn't Nick learned yet that the way to go is a "Nick and Drew Hour"??

Love is in the air... Or, you know, not.

I'm scared, so scared. I'm afraid that none of the Nielsen families will watch Nick's solo show and TPTB will continue on in the deluded belief that we all LOVE Jessica. These variety hours make it all about Jess, but I'm just there for the Nickiliciousness and his reaction shots to Jess' stupidity.

ETA: That e-mail was so sad. I try to feel sympathy for Jessica, but I think she needs to move away from her family a little bit, mainly CreePa Simpson.

I HATE JESSICA SIMPSON-LACHEY AND I HATE NICK LACHEY-SIMPSON!!!

As singers, they're sort of tolerable, but as the Newlyweds, they're appalling and ridiculous.

And don't get me started on that bitch Ashlee.

Nick's show is supposed to focus on recording his new album. Rather like Ashlee's I suppose.

I hear Nick and Jessica seem to be heading towards getting a divorce. My plans for Nick to make gay porno in my bedroom is one step closer to fruition.

<MR BURNS>Excellent... </MR BURNS>

According to the cover of Us Weekly (because I don't read it, I'll just have to go by what the cover says), Nick and Jessica are not breaking up. (Of course, that's from their own mouth. "We're Blissfully in Love!" and all.)

But based on this email sent to the good folks at Gawker, the PA assigned to them at the Rockefeller tree lighting ceremony begs to differ.

Suddenly, next season seems more and more interesting. I wonder if they'll gloss over any problems though now that Creepy Pa is managing Nick too. I'm sure whatever angle he's chosen for his Nick pimping will be readily apparent by the first or second episode. Jessica is the "loveable" ditz. Asslee is the unloved second sister. Who will Nick be?

The entire article inside is a classic case of thou protest a bit too much. We are sooooo in love. Gag. I loved the wonderful link above. I don't care if it's true or not. It's believable, and that's good enough for me!

I thought Nick did a pretty good job hosting Big in 04 last night on VH1. I just want him to succeed just so he'll be known as something other than Mr. Simpson. I'll jump over to that thread and see what others thought....

I bought the US Weekly (hangs head). Pics of the two of them in ratty jeans, Jess with no makeup (she looks about 15 without makeup), Nick looking anything BUT happy. Very strange. Yeah, there is trouble in fairytale-land.

Is this true?

He'll never leave her now, especially if he starts making money, Joe Simpson wouldnt let a cash cow go so easily. Its either that or Joe will run his career into the ground so as to ruin him completely and send him back to Cinci to live in obscurity. I really hope that it isnt true.

I bought the US magazine, too. Is it just me or is anyone else reminded of Cindy Crawford and Richard Gere? Remember they took out an ad or something in a newspaper to proclaim their love for each other and how they weren't just married out of convenience or to hide the fact that they are both raging homosexuals?

If Nick and Jessica would just ignore the reports about their marriage (like most more seasoned "celebrities" do), I might buy that they actually love each other.

I agree they would be much better off to just ignore the reports if they are still truly in love. It is clearly a sign of prostesting too much, and often when celebrities do that it is only a sign that the reports are correct and divorce papers are signed a few weeks later.

The only reason I can see for doing all of these articles and making so many statements about the goodness of their marriage, is that their career is based on being married, so reports of divorce might make Jessica panic into thinking her career is over.

And since they have another season of Newlyweds and would like to write about book about having a successful marriage, I assume they are worried about the financial impact of the rumors.

Note to Nick and Jessica: we have already decided that we do NOT want a marriage like yours, so there is no need for you to keep up the facade. We do not all aspire to have a relationship in which it is clear that the husband is so unhappy that he cannot hide it in magazine photo shoots or on your TV show Newlyweds.

The original source is now longer available without paying a fee, but here is a post from ladymadonna back on Oct. 7 that seems to confirm it:

I finally caught the Happy Birthday Jessica--Love Nick [giant eyeroll on the title] special. The concert singing? Was terrible. Hands down terrible. On the radio, Angles isn't that bad, but when left to her own devices? Terrible.

I HATE! American Idol, but think if someone came on and auditioned with that song, in that voice, with those facial expressions, and with that screaming. Simon and Randy would be laughing behind stacks of paper, the clip would be shown over and over and over on the "the worst auditions Ever clip show, and she would be this year's William Hung for being just. that. bad. Life sucks some times.

In other news: How'd that Grammy nod treat ya Joe?

I have one point to add about all of you that think Jessica and Nick's marriage is horrible just because he makes pained faces on their show. Did you ever stop to consider that the "reailty show" is not really REAL? Obviously their plain lives are not going to be too exciting, so they concoct personalities and storylines for them. Nick's pained looks are probably just an act to make the show funny, just as *some* (definitely not all I'm sure) of Jessica's ditziness is an act. So I truly don't think that Nick hates his wife. Just make sure not to take what you see on their show at face value. It is, after all, just a gimic, and it is most definitely not reality. I take it for entertainment's sake only and enjoy it.