FYI: Nick & Jessica are about to be on Oprah - not sure if this is a repeat or not.

I believe it. The Notre Dame/Purdue rivalry is by and large a fun and friendly one. The Purdue/I.U. rivalry isn't. Those football and basketball games can be violent for the fans involved...fist fights in the parking lot, and such.

Mr. Maggie was on the World's Largest Drum crew in the Purdue marching band, and distinctly remembers I.U. fans trying to slit the big drumheads open with a knife during the game. Those drumheads are specially ordered and cost thousands of dollars, and is one of our most beloved school icons. Purdue fans do equally stupid and mean-spirited stuff.

Whenever I see Nick, I always think that he and I would have been friends in college. He's just a goodhearted, sweet guy who would be fun to party with. He reminds me of some of the fraternity brothers I knew back in the day. I stress that I would have been friends with him. The Nicks of the world invariably marry the Jessicas, but form lasting, deep friendships with nonJessicas. Case in point: my best friend John.



I thought that only people who had reached a milestone anniversary...10 years or 25 years or whatever...renewed their wedding vows. We've been talking about renewing ours in two years, when we celebrate our 10th. I personally think that's too soon. It's such a beautiful gesture, reaffirming your love and commitment to each other; if you do it every fifteen seconds, it isn't nearly as meaningful.

Will CreepyPa preside over the vows?

Shades of Pam Anderson and Tommy Lee. Maybe someone will steal a home video from a safe in their garage....

Little vomit in my mouth.

I think it is sweet that they renewed thier vows with no one else around....but the camera crew. I think it shows how close they and the crew have gotten; all of the places they have visited, all the meals, shopping, surgery.....makes my heart go pitter, pitter, splat.

I bet Nick looks back fondly at their wedding. I mean, weddings are a big deal: everyone is paying attention to you, it's your day etc. Jessica seems like the kind of person who really likes weddings, planning it, bossing people around, spending all kinds of money, etc.

I bet Nick rationalizes Jessica's stupidity and silliness on the show, and figures doing it again will let them get on the right foot of being newlyweds, without the cameras. I lived with Mr. Schoolzout for about 4 years and still had many issues to learn about when we got married. I wouldn't have wanted cameras here... yikes, what a mess.

Didn't we only hear about the Hawaii plans in the same Vanity Fair article that included the "IQ of 160" gem? I was skeptical of that initially, but maybe Nick wanted Hawaii, and Simp/PaSimp wanted Texas. You don't have to have an IQ of 160 to figure out who's going to win that battle.

I also thought, when they were bitching about the house feeling like a set, them having no privacy etc, that their new house would be on Cribs and the vow renewal would be a segment on Celebrity Weddings. Simp just cannot exist without the cameras. I think she would implode.

Ha, I totally read that as World's Largest Dumb Crew and thought, what the hell is that?? I need glasses obviously.

Did Nick graduate from Miami of OH? I'm not surprised he's still buddies with his frat brothers~Miami is notorious for a large Greek population. (I went to OSU~Go Buckeyes!)

I thought he was a sports medicine major, but then I saw A2Z on VH-1 and it said he was a musical theater major. Anyone know?

Yeah, that's about the speed of things with these two. They really had no other reason to dislike each other - they had the same job, were around the same age, etc. It was silly to me, but DEAD serious to the two of them.
Has Mr Maggie seen/heard of Blast!, being that he's into drums? Now, ~that~ is an example of musical talent - Jess, Ash, even Nick could learn a thing or two.... (Of course, Blast is brainchild of a group from IU, so that may be a touchy subject...)



I'll bet you're right. I remember him on Letterman (Leno? Some show) trying to explain the Chicken/Tuna deal, and he tried to say that "Lots of people are confused by that..." And Jay/Dave interupted with "No....they aren't." It was funnier than it sounds... But he seems to believe that the dumb act will go away when their lives are "normal".

Like everyone else has said, renewing your vows is something reserved for landmark ocassions. To commemorate 10 or 20 year anniversaries, when one of the partner's cancer finally goes to remission, when all the kids leave the house and the dynamic of the marriage changes... But two years? A nice dinner, maybe a party is really all you need. Jessica (and Nick too, lets not get him off the hook so fast) seem realy stuck in the superficial aspecst of their relationship.

A wedding does not a marriage make, no matter how many pretty flowers you have.

I remember them on PBS special. I loved the band music, though I wonder if they realised that their "style" has a high gay-sensibility quotient. It was oddly-sexy and they all looked like they just finished the San Francisco Gay Pride parade. My TV nearly melted and I cursed that I didn't have a blank tape in the VCR.

Woof and WOOF!

Caught last night's episode during this afternoon's repeats. Among the many things that bugged me was when N&J arrive at Tony & Lisa's and Jessica says to Nick "Take my Louis Vuitton upstairs for me". First off, demanding much? Second, how pretentious can Jessica possibly be? Wouldn't luggage or bags have sufficed? No, she has to mention the words Louis Vuitton as much as possible to emphasize the fact that she, as a celebrity, owns such things that ordinary peasants can't afford.

I know I can get spendy and into labels at times, but the amounts of money she wastes trying to buy some class is pathetic.

I watched the Oprah rerun where Nick and Jess follow the segment on rich kids which included the Hilton sisters. Jess could have been Hilton sister #3 -- just as self-absorbed, spoiled and clueless.

Aww, Nick was adorable. He seems so genuinely sweet, goodhearted, easygoing. Those pirahnna -- er Hilton sisters were no doubt sizing him up for their next prey.



Oprah mentioned that she'd noticed Jess had that hard to get LV bag, and Jess was beaming as she exclaimed she treated it like a pet. Yuk.




Sad but true.

Oh, and ITA with everyone who loves the Nick and Drew home improvement segments. I hope MTV sees the potential for doing some kind of spin-off of those two in a "Straight Eye for the Straight Guy" format.

Though I think Nick would be a decent parent, I seriously hope those two never participate in the rearing of any children be it their biological or adopted children. Imagine the therapy the kid would need when he or she comes to the realization that Mommy loves her new LV bags more than them.

[OT]

I saw Blast! and I fucking hated it. And I'm a former band geek. I do not enjoy some condescending voice speaking colors to me like I am a three-year-old learning how to talk. "VI-O-LET! VI-O-LET! YEL-LOW! YEL-LOW!" We almost left at the intermission--IMO the best part was the extended drum sequence. The rest? A big ball of suck. Your mileage may vary. [/OT]

Anyway, it compares well in suckitude to all that is Jessucka. I continue to find reasons to miss the first run of new episodes and wonder why I bother to attempt to catch it on the weekends.

He'd play hard to get until she told him she found the perfect place to spy on Nick and Jessica having sex.

No wonder I love this board!

They did mention it. I think it was Nick that thought it might be a coyote. It was after the "it can't be a racoon, right?" discussion.

This needs to be printed on a t-shirt. And here's a thought: maybe for the renewal of their vows, Jessucka can wear the shirt instead of that ridiculous "Soon To Be Mrs. Nick Lachey" jacket she had on before her wedding.

The thing about weddings is, it sometimes seems that the bigger the ceremony and hoopla, the less likely the marriage will last. I don't know why that is, and keep in mind that I had a big Catholic wedding with 250 guests (300 invited). It just seems that the more money you pump into every little detail increases the level of letdown you will have when everyday domesticity creeps into your marriage.

I've been married...let's say a looonnnnggg time (yes, to the same person :)) and very few of the couples we knew in the early years are still married to each other. A good number of those people had expensive, lavish weddings -- I've either attended their wedding or saw their wedding albums. I do think there's something to the idea of getting caught up in the fantasy of the perfect wedding = perfect marriage, and when it's all over and the reality of not-so-glamorous everyday life sets in, the marriage collapses. Interesting that the second marriages (and a few thirds!) were considerably toned down from the extravaganza of the first.

Although I agree with others who point out that renewing vows is usually done for milestone anniversaries (e.g. 20 years) or occasions, I guess I can see the reason for Nick and Jessica to do it so soon. Maybe it's a way for them to transition out of the artificial circumstances of televised married life into their real life together, without the cameras. Or at least I hope so -- but I don't have much hope for this being a lifetime relationship.

As for me and Mr. B. -- married by a judge in the Fulton County (downtown Atlanta) courthouse. When we walked into his office, we heard a soap opera on a TV in the next room, before he came rushing in while putting on his judge's robe -- Hee!

Nick went to USC (fuck the Trojans) for his first semester and he was a musical theatre major. He then transfered to Miami U to do Sports Med.

But she had cameras there, right? Or did I misread something?

According to a post upthread, yes, cameras were at the renewal ceremony. But I meant their married life when the show ends, when there will be no cameras. Hasn't it been reported that this is the last season of the Newlyweds?

That's so romantic. I'd rather have a memory like that than an overwrought ceremony. My wedding was large but not expensive; however, given the choice to do it over again, we would elope to Antigua. Definitely. We married in the Church to shut my mother up. End of story.

Bitter, party of one, your table is now available.

We do have a funny memory of driving to Chicago to catch our flight to Hawaii for the honeymoon: we stopped at McDonald's and got four cheeseburgers, a 20 piece McNugget, fries, and two huge Cokes. We were so busy at the reception, we didn't have a chance to eat. We were starving...that was the best damn McD's we ever ate.

Here's a great example of an overblown celebrity wedding that ended in divorce recently: Melissa Rivers. Her wedding cost well over one million dollars, and she filed for divorce less than two years later.

Nick does an awful lot to keep Jessucka happy, I think. Guys hate weddings and they participate primarily to make their chicks happy. I like the footage of Nick stuffed into a tuxedo in the opening credits. You know he'd rather be kickin' back and chillin' with Drew, sipping a brew and watching the game, but there he is at the circus...er, his wedding to Jessucka. He's also a good sport about CreepyPa's fascination with Jessucka's sexual being. I cannot imagine my man doing the same. Then again, I cannot imagine my dad even imagining what goes on in my bed...on the kitchen table...in the back seat of our car...on the washing machine...ooops! Sorry about the reverie ;-)

Congratulations, oldbabe, you're an inspiration to us young marrieds in that it can be done. My parents were married for thirty years when Dad died. It sounds to this broad that you found yourself a keeper. I love the story about the soap operas.

Jessica needs to trot down to the local video store and rent All About Eve. I think Cay-Cee wants not just the husband, but the house, the career, the fans, etc.

Oooohh... Although I don't want to give CaighSea credit for being that clever, THAT would be a cool story arch to watch!

Good for you. I also live in the ATL and am getting married soon. I begged Mr. Good to marry me at the courthouse but he will not relent! Planning a wedding sucks.

Back OT ... I think Nick and Jessica will stay married, if for nothing else, her image.

These reports of the end of the show are all over the place. I'm starting to think it's a ploy, and as soon as MTV throws more money at them, PaSimp will jump all over it. They'll just call it something other than "Newlyweds." And even if it is, there is simply no way Simp, attention addict that she is, can live without it, so she and PaSimp will find some other way to whore out her life. The fact that they even took cameras to a private vow renewal ceremony where even friends and family weren't allowed (and I don't buy that either, until I see it,) speaks volumes about the Simp family's fucked-up priorities. Cause you know that wasn't Nick's idea. I think they're doomed, regardless.

So true...I was very confused when I read that family and friends were not invited, but the camera crew was. How does this make a renewal of vows more authentic? I am assuming 99% of the population would think that a renewal of vows would seem more real in front of family and friends with no camera crew in sight.

The thing about Jess that bugs me to no end is that she seems to think that because she got married and is still married after "all of this time", that she is somehow an expert on marriage. When we all know the reality is that many of the viewers have much better marriages than hers. And many of the viewers have also been married for much longer, so they probably know a bit more about it than Jess does.

Agree with everyone--no reason to renew your vows so soon. It is clear she must feel unsettled about her marriage and feel the need to renew the vows to try to show everyone how real it is.

If they did it for the right reasons (which would involve not telling people about it), then yes, I would certainly buy it and wish them well. But when you take the cameras (for the second wedding in a row!), and do it specifically for the cameras, it's a sham and a flaming bag of crap.


*hangs head in shame* I just bought one for my November wedding. One day in my life I’m allowed to be cheesy damit!

In "Newlyweds"land this means "family and friends other than PervDad and StageMom Simpson, little lost girl trying to be a rock star sister Ashlee Simpson, KaaSea, Drew and Leah, Tony and his wife, assorted small children paid $5 each by MTV to scream and ask Jessica for autographs, Jessica's bodyguard, Nick's driver, the guy who rented them the forklift, the woman who helped Jessica find a hat at Escada, various shopgirls from La Perla, a hair and wig stylist, and Jessica's brand new puppy were banned from the ceremony"

I agree that Jessica won't know what to do 10 minutes after she realizes the cameras are gone and they ain't coming back. I think she's going to feel major depression sinking in.

Nick, on the other hand, is going to break out those long beige shorts from season 1, pop open a Miller, tune into ESPN, and start scratching himself.

Wait, you are going to marry Nick Lachey too? Does Jessica know about this?

I've never gotten this approach to solving a problem. Let's say you're overweight and want to lose weight. Just start the diet. You don' t need a two day eating binge to kick things off. Overspending? Take a cruise and say that you are going to cut back when you get home? No - just cut up the credit cards and stop shopping. Feeling that your marriage is artificial and intruded upon? Remove all removable distractions and spend time doing things together that you both enjoy.

The "one last blast" approach is not how I solve a problem.

Actually if you look closely you can see that Mason was laying quietly on Nick, sucking on a pacifier. There was a lot of editing in that episode. For instance, every time Jessica picked the baby up you heard him crying, however if you look at the side of his head that is visible he doesn't appear to be crying.

Ok, that made me laugh out loud. No, I am not going to marry Nick Lachey. I'm sure CaCee has already called dibs on that. Mr. Hailey is one hell of a catch though.


So true, so true. I miss the giant Abercrombie shorts...

God, this made me laugh so hard!! I hate that girl and her stupidly spelled name!

[OT] Mrfan and I eloped to Jamaica when we got married, 10 years ago this past Wednesday. It was awesome! Wouldn't have done it any other way. And I agree, especially when it comes to celeb marriages...the bigger and more lavish usually means the sooner the divorce papers get filed. Sad as that is. [/OT]

I hope to God Jessuka never spawns, whether it be with Nick or her next husband. Never, ever, ever.

Mr. Truffles17 and I eloped too. A guy he works with is an ordained minister, so he performed our brief ceremony for us. We basically just wanted to be married and are trying to buy a house, so the thought of spending that money on one day didn't feel right to us. I wouldn't begrudge people their choices of having a big wedding and spending a lot of money, it just didn't fit the goals the he and I had in mind for us.

I hope to God that Jessica's 15 minutes of fame have passed if/when they decide to spawn. I don't need to see her spread-eagled on the delivery table. PapaPerv might like that though.....

Better make that a tabel for 2 maggiegault as I will definitely be joining.

My problem was my MIL though, she had the audacity to demand a wedding (my original guest list was 22 people) or else she wouldnt show and MrD was to chicken to tell her she'd be kissing any relationship with her future grandchildren goodbye. Ahhhh, five years later and I still seethe about it.


Oh but we will see it, remember that crappy Brandy show about her pregnancy and delivery? I would bet MTV has already signed her for that special and Jess has no shame, she'd do anything if it meant a camera would be focused on her.

Aaand 18 months later, Brandy is aboard the bullet train to Divorce-ville! Baby daddy was a bum anyway girl!

OT Now he's saying they werent married ever, they just said they were to protect her rep. And actually from her response which was something like "We had a spiritual union" it sounds like he's telling the truth.

Ugh, I forgot about the Brandy special. I didn't watch more than 5 minutes of it, and the part I did watch had her walking around the hospital, crying because she couldn't see her baby being born there. Whatever. Oh, and I saw the part where they went to buy a bunch of ugly jewelry.

Since Jessucka seems hellbent on adopting first, they will do a series entitled "Newlyweds: The Adoption Process".

I think they might stay married. I think somone mentioned it upthread, something about Nick's mom being married numerous times...? If that's true, he might want to work on the marriage so he won't end up like his mom.

[OT], I want to elope somewhere very romantic, and then have a party when we get back. I always dreamed about a big Cinderella wedding, but now I would rather elope. And the party could be a bbq or whatever. :)[/OT]

I think we are in for The Baby Story I- adoption, The Baby Story II- Nick knocks her up, The Couple's Counseling Story- It's hard to be a star, The Divorce Story- Run Nick Run, and Jessica-The Dating Story-now that she is not a virgin she can sleep around.

I am with you lizzyb831, that sounds like the perfect plan...now I just need to find a MrMillie

When I got married I had the big ole wedding and the marriage lasted 14 months. This time around I have been happily living in sin for 18 years!, we will get married someday (dont want to rush into anything) and we have decided we will make a quick trip to Reno to do it.

Did you try renewing your vows a couple time? Oh, and there needs to be a camera crew there too. I hear that's the way to salvage that spark. ;o)

What actually happened (I watched this closely both times because I thought it was so funny) was they were watching President Bush, and Jessica said, "Look, it's our leader, Mr. Good!" Political correctness or upcoming opinion on the election aside, Mr. Good is a freaking hilarious moniker.

It also made me sort of like Jessica for a split second. It seemed so genuine four-year-old silly rather than practiced-20-whatever-year-old silly.

I don't remember Mason crying... Like other posters have said, it might have been dubbed. A lot of the crying was fake in retrospect.

She actually said "Mr. Bush" and that scene was sooo totally edited to appear that Mason cried as soon as she said that. There was a lot of that in the baby episode, weird editing to make it seem like Mason was crying when he so obviously wasn't. Don't the powers that be realize this show doesn't need any forced comedy? Watching Simpleton brings the funny, no whack editing needed.

Well, *I* wore a jacket that said "Soon to be Mrs. Hailey" on the back, in a shocking turn of events! Mr.Maggie's comment: "He can have you."

That's cool about the jacket. On YOU it will be darling. On HER it was contrived and obnoxious. That's one of those things that are so corny, it's cool. I speak from experience here. My first dance with my new husband was "I Do! I Do! I Do! I Do! I Do!" by ABBA. My Dad wore a button on his tuxedo jacket that he bought at my first rock n' roll concert, Men at Work in 1983. My mother in law wore a spangly, sparkly evening gown to an 11:30am wedding.

Weddings aren't fun unless they aren't at least a *little* tacky. Unless you're part of The FamilySimp, where you think you are the epitome of class, but you serve half-eaten pickles at your reception buffet.

I was thinking about Jessucka and KaighCeigh (that gets more and more fun) while stuck in traffic this afternoon. I then realized that I started musing about the two of them after contemplating the difficulties a good friend of mine is having with her teenaged daughter, who is a sophomore in high school. I found this very telling. Both of them operate on a perpetual High School Cheerleading Squad level. Mad props to cheerleaders, I love them, but there comes a time when you need to leave high school in high school. The two of them together remind me of Jess and Caycie headed to the Powder Puff football game to raise money for the Enchantment Under the Stars junior prom. That's all good and well when you are that age, but eventually you must move on and mature. The two of them seem stuck. *SIGH* We only know what the cameras show us, but Nick is a 30 year old man. Not old, certainly, but mature. She must be an incredible lay. And even then, eventually that grows boring.

Well now, that almost doesn't give you enough time to write a book on how to have the perfect marriage!

This is precisely the reason that I think Jessica should have had some kind of formal education beyond high school. Not knocking people that didn't attend college (Mr. Truffles17 didn't), but in my experience college gets the high school mentality out of you. Of all the people I know that did not continue with any education beyond high school, most, but not all, of them are still stuck in high school mode and act accordingly.