All my life, I have only seen men do that. My theory is that it's akin to the last shake after a pee for them. At least three guys have agreed when presented with that theory.

Which just confirms that Jessucka is a MAN, baby!

Most people do it to round off the total to the nearest quarter, or dollar or whatever. Not to "make sure it's full, hehehehe!!"

But I've seen these guys do it just to do it, to the tune of $19.37 or $5.92. Ah, the myriad of reasons why people do what they do. Jessucka doesn't really seem to have reasons, though, it's more like aborted instincts.

I've only seen this show once or twice, but I'm a Vanity Fair subscriber so I just got finished reading the article in the Aug. issue. Most of it was the stuff covered in her "Driven" episode, but I have to give you this quote from Pa Simpson:

"People have always said the industry is going to destroy your family," Joe says, "but, for me, the industry kept my family intact...
We've always had each other, and we've wanted to love each other in ways that most families never get the opportunity."
p.207


The f*ck?

Stop getting your hopes up, Jerry. Nick won't be coming to his senses anytime soon. You see, Nick is suffering from NPS (New P*ssy Syndrome). It's a condition that afflicts men who wait an inordinate amount of time for sex with someone they deem to be "hot". (Listen up, ladies. I'm giving you the benfit of my 40 plus years of experience with men. I know whereof I speak.) That whole "man as hunter" theory is, in my opinion, absolutely true. When a man has to wait a long time for sex, and then finally gets it, he feels like the conquering hero who has finally captured his prey (or prize). Nick is caught up in that and he can't make rational decisions so long as he is. He's placed this silly woman/child on an undeserving pedestal because he thinks she's some great prize. (When he was on Regis a few months ago he showed Regis a picture of Jessica (sweet, out-of-it Reege didn't know who she was) and when Regis said she was really beautiful, Nick said, "Yeah, I overachieved.") Overachieved?!? You've got a spoiled, useless simpleton of a wife whom you'll always have to care for as if she were your child and on whom you can never depend. What if a crisis arises? Do you honestly see her a life partner who'll be there for you? But Nick can't see that yet. The NPS is in full effect. Of course, it will eventually wear off, much like the smell of a new car wears off. Think about it, when a man gets a new car, he's so excited he can't see straight. He worries about where to park it, and if its gonna get rain or birdshit on it, he wants to cover it up and keep it shiny and new forever and show all his friends so they'll be jealous of his great "prize". Sooner later, when the new car smell wears off, he starts to notice that the clutch sticks (or whatever the hell a clutch does), and he notices annoying sounds, or problems with gauges, or whatver, all of which were probably there at the beginning, but he didn't notice because he was captivated by the New Car Smell (NCS, a sister syndrome). Eventually Nick's fascination over having sex with Jessica will wear off (I'm guessing sex with that selfish bitch can't be too fulfilling to begin with). He will then come to his senses, divorce himself from Jess, Pimp Daddy and the entire leeching clan, and begin to live the kind of life that a nice, down-to-earth guy like him truly deserves

I am "old" (30-something)...Never been to Hooters...I have the same views as Jessica about the whole "Hooter girl" thing.

HOWEVER, Jessica is an asswipe because posing for magazine covers such as the one where she was vacuuming in next to nothing is the same GODDAMN thing!

F---ing TWIT

Doesn't this:



contradict this:



at least for the girls?

Just gross.

No, it's just that we have dirty minds binkbink. ;-)
I think he means "love" as in the ability to buy each other Mercedes and go on luxury vacations which other families can't afford. And to support each other's musical careers. The man really needs to learn to choose his words

PaSimp saidHA!, I knew it.




And on the whole Hooters thing. Maybe when they first opeened, it was risque to have women serve food in skimpy outfits that are really not particularly comfortable. But I've been there, a friend of mine (a girl) loves the wings, so I go to keep her company. And honestly, I see more cleavage and skin when I go to the pool. Hell, I show more skin when I go to the pool. If the hooters girl dont mind, and make a good living, then its their business. Just like I dont judge women who wear long shapeless dresses, flat shoes, say at home while their husbands work and are heavily involved in their local baptist church. Personally, I would find Hooters girls more interesting, but thats just me. If the Baptists woman is happy, then good for her.

There's a reason for that, Jess. In most places, that's illegal.

Figures. He can't believe he caught this amazingly beautiful woman. I would've thought he's had his choice of Grade A women for quite a while now, what with being in a band and all. Meaning, shouldn't it take more than looks to impress him? Guess not.

So crazyleggs must be right. It's not so much about the beauty, but the conquest.

Such a healthy modern view of marriage, eh? Jessica, in Nick's view, is one slab of Grade A beef. No ground round for this dude. He's such a tool.

Vomit.

Sadly, Crazyleggs, I think your theory is true, though not for all men, certainly for some. I've seen it many times and even lived it. Even more sadly, Jessica's suggestion that a woman withhold sex to keep her man and get what she wants works well when the man is afflicted with NPS.

After a paragraph where Pa Simpson says that pre- Newlyweds, Jessica was not as successful as Brit & X-tina because girls could not relate to her due to her five-octave range and incredible Barbie doll beauty-

Another Pa Simpson quote, also from p. 207:

"The beauty of the television show", Joe continues, "is that it gave people the opportunity to see that, yes, she is beautiful. Yes, she can sing. [But] they are not in love with her boobs. They are not in love with her hair. Those things are secondary. America has fallen in love with an imperfect girl who has gas, who stumbles, who makes mistakes... And for the first time they are hearing her sing through new glasses- through the eyes of 'I love her heart.'"

So how do we hear someone through new glasses? Mix analogy much, jackass? And the boob comment, ew. He could have said "body" and have been just as effective.
At first I was pissed that VF had stooped to cover her, but the unintentional snark is worth its weight in gold.

BTW: Her friend/ assistant's name is spelled CaCee Cobb. No f*cking comment.

Count me in too! Honestly, I realize that there are some people who don't agree but how can you possibly chastize someone for wearing a tank top and shorts for some extra cash? Being a Hooters girl is probably the most harmless thing possible. And given some of Jessica's magazine covers, she has got to be the biggest hypocrite ever.

This is the whole basis for the philosophy of The Rules. I'm 33 and happily married...and I believe that there is a lot of truth in the quote. When you behave like the prize, and act like the prize, men believe you're the prize...men are notoriously easy marks when it comes to sex. (Nothing like stating the obvious.) I cannot stand those bints who wrote those books, but there is one universal truth that has me believing: Man Must Pursue.

From what we know about the Nick and Jessucka pairing, she played into this, got her man, is making a mint of money from it, and gets away with a whole lot of nonsense because she is, in Nick's eyes, "the prize."

Of course, the novelty of "the prize" eventually wears off. That's where the depth and substance of the woman comes into play. That's what gets the two of you through tough times. That's the stuff of a long-lasting bond. Jessucka seems content to remain at the level of Brand-New F*cktoy. Now, I know I try to be that with my man, and it makes him happy, but all of the time? Sometimes you gotta take the car to the mechanic, you know, and buy toilet paper at Walmart, and mow the lawn. Those things go into a successful marriage/partnership as much as sex does, I think.

What I'm trying to say is, I can see Nick and Jessucka succeeding in the bedroom aspect of marriage. The day-to-day stuff, not so much. If you can't swing the day-to-day nitty gritty of married life, the sex inevitably suffers. And if sex is the strongest part of your relationship, where does that leave you?

ETA:


Word. My father, may he rest in peace, had two daughters. The man went to his grave never acknowledging that we a) had breasts; b) had periods; c) had sex. Oh, sure, we reached maturity and he could do the math, but it was never a topic of conversation, or even mentioned. With our mother, yes, and we girls could be quite frank with mom about stuff. But Dad? Never. In his mind and in his heart, his two girls were vestal virgins. And that's fine by me.

I saw some show last night on VH1 last night..or maybe it was E!...Aaaaanywho, they had on the children of famous parents...

Hulk Hogan was on talking about her daughter who is 13 and apparently has a record album coming out soon...he was absoloutely visibly embarassed when talking about her daughter's developing body. He could hardly change the subject fast enough.

I was like...YES! Finally a proper response from a father...so unlike this disturbing man known as Papa Simp.

Did no one else get the shudders when the men...including PapaSimp...caught the women sunbathing topless?"

This family gives me the willies.

Believe me, EVERYONE was disturbed by the sunbathing incident.



Ironic, really, that that is the case for waiting until you are married to have sex and now it seems to be their problem anyway.

However, when you look at the longevity of pop star romances and marriages Nick and Jessica are probably the most stable couple out there. Not to ignore their idiot behavior, but neither one of them has had serial relationships/affairs and they were committed enough to wait to have sex. I can see the "Hunting the Prize" theory but I also think that can only last so long and there has to be at least some level of commitment involved.

To chime in a little late, I think the NPS is part of it. I also wonder if initially, Jessica's silliness was something that made Nick feel more of a man. I mean, she's clueless and so dependent, so it makes him look like a take-charge kind of guy. He gets to wear the pants, so to speak.

However, it seems that now he's very annoyed with her. It's no longer cute and funny. I think he's seeing that brains and some level of independence are sexy. Also, I wonder if he's wondering what kind of mother she would be, both in terms of the gene pool and rearing skills.

Mr.schoolzout said that once he hit about 22, he started looking at women at potential mates and would take into account all these kinds of things like intelligence, genes, what their mothers look like (shallow, yes, anyhoo). He said how he had to make the switch from "good for now" to "good for now and later".

I think Nick really fell in love and Jessica helped him fall into that traditional male-female patern. Now, since they are a partnership, she can't do anything, particularly the 'female' things like domestic chores.

Poor guy! Free Nick, once agin I say it!

Nick is addicted to Jessica like Whitney is addicted to crack. He wanted to get married and have kids. He thought that would happen with Jessica. She dooped the poor bastard into thinking she wanted all that too. I won't ever refer to what they have as a marriage. So he is definately not married and probably not getting kids anytime soon. He looks like such a douche bag now.

As for the Hooters stuff I was disgusted. My sister in law worked there for a while and she is none of those things Jessica said she was. That was bullshit, and I was appalled. Jessica acts like more of a whore than all the honor students I know that work there trying to make a decent living. Fuck it all, we all stop being decent humans and sell our souls to record companies, MTV and magazines and date rich guys for money. Thats better. Fuck.You.Jessica.

WORD. Like I said earlier, half her magazine covers are worse than any Hooters uniform and her dumb, slutty behavior (even after she is married) is ten times worse.

She strikes me as the kind of person that wouldnt be able to handle it if Nick tried to leave her and would do anything to get him to stay. She cant handle it if he is even mad at her, I have no doubts that she would lay down in front of his car to prevent him from rolling out of the driveway just to go golfing if she didnt want him to go. This Charmed gig will be the end of them. Remeber how crazy she got about the back up dancers?

ETA: But he also strikes me as the kind of guy who stays in an unhappy marriage rather than rock the boat.

Article talking about the 160. I fixed the link!
This article says she will be in the X-Men movie. WTF?

Article about her "first love" some dude named Jensen Ackles. Can we get more info on him?

It has already been discredited that she will be in the X-Men movie. I believe there was an article posted earlier on the boards that said no one, including main stars like Hugh Jackman, Halle Berry, etc., was confirmed for another X-Men movie.

Here is a webpage about him.

That link for the 160 brings me to a reply box for the thread. Are you sure you linked it right?

Most hotels use key cards these days, and they are encoded upon check-in. The room number has never been printed on any key card I've ever gotten, and I've had to remember it on my own.


Thanks, Pa Simpson. I think if my father ever talked about my boobs, I'd drop through the floor of embarrassment.

hell, i'm 21 and if i see my dad and i'm wearing a low cut shirt , he tells me to button up my shirt or cover up.

My dad does the same thing. Actually he asks me if I'm doing okay with money, becuase he can see I cant afford enought fabric for my shirt.

If my Dad ever used my name and the word "boobs" in the same sentence I think I would be struck by lightning.

Then again, this is the family who spent Easter vacation sunbathing topless together.

When Jessica first came out she said she dated a really famous actor who broke her heart because she wouldn't have sex with him and he didn't respect that. She said she didnt want to name any names. Jensen Ackles was on Days of Lives back then and heart throb among the soap opera world. I think its funny how now she feels its ok to drag him name through her ass crack because shes so much more famous now. Last year Nick even teased her about him in an article they did together for Teen Magazine of some shit like that. Jessica was like "he wasnt really my boyfriend" But now she says he was. She also said that he flew her out to go see him in LA. Ok lets do some quick math folks. She met Nick when she was 18. She said she dated Jensen before that. So could have still been 18 but anywho she wasn't famous yet, her album hadn't dropped and we know how daddy is. So papa perv let her fly out to LA to go kick it with a soap hearthrob??? That was ok in Christian land?? oh wait, I bet it was because papa perv thought Jensen could help her career. Funny I have a friend who is 26 years old and still lives with her devout christian parents...she is not allowed to stay out past midnight with her boyfriend...not criticizing christianity because everyone has differet rules, and I'm not saying your not a good christian if you go and visit your boyfriend...but I'm just looking for a little consistancey. Will the real slim shady please stand up???

[QUOTE]Most hotels use key cards these days, and they are encoded upon check-in. The room number has never been printed on any key card I've ever gotten, and I've had to remember it on my own.
[QUOTE]

In one of the episodes Jessica is walking around looking for her room, and couldn't find it. Then she remembers the room number and realizes that the room number was on the key.

I think people like PapaSimpson find all kinds of loopholes to validate things. I wonder if Jessica went out to LA, got this guy all worked up, and when she didn't put out, he got frustrated and left.

I am Catholic and I remember this argument we had with this priest at our engaged encounter (a group session they make you go to if you're Catholic). The priest said how if you got engaged first and then were shacking up, that's fine-- no problem. However, if you were living together, then decided to make it legit and get married, that was sinful?

HUH??!

Quick word on the boob, dad mentioning thing. Once I turned 10, even though nothing was really happening, I remember my dad relegated all that type of stuff to my mom. No discussion of periods, bras, boobs, etc were mentioned. In fact, my mom, being as uptight as she is, used to yell at me if I left any evidence of my development lying around (ie. drop a bra in the bathroom after taking a shower, leave a pad wrapper lying around, etc).

I think PapaPerv goes the extra mile to make sure everyone sees Jessica as a sexual being.

Here is a link to a very snarky article in today's SF Chronicle:
SF Jessica Article

edited to add the article and not double-post

Mr. Maggie and I have basically lived together since about a month after we met. Unofficially at one point, officially at another. Certainly in our minds and hearts we were married long before our actual ceremony. We were fed that line of bull at our Pre-Cana sessions, too. Then again, we were lucky to have found a church that would marry us...it was entirely for my Catholic family, and we were turned down by parish after parish after the Padre learned that we were Living In Sin.

Never again. I will never put my husband through anything like that again. It's amazing the amount of bullshit that is spewed in the name of the Lord.

....never happier to be a protestant...

my best friend was married in a catholic church. Not only living with her boyfriend but also over 6 months visibly pregnant wearing a shiny white wedding dress.

While her sister who made the decision to marry a man who was *horror* divorced was not allowed to marry in the same church.

Mentioned above:



As a famously intelligent and classy women (although, alas, fictional) once said:



Despite all the discussion of The Rules, all the people I actually know in successful long-term relationships appeared to base it all on such bizarre things as mutual respect and satisfying companionship. Perhaps I mix in strange circles. Are other people's experiences different?

P.S. Love the SF article schoolzout. It's great someone's calling out that high IQ claim.

OT here..sorry:
I have also lived with my fiancee since a month after we met. we have happily lived together (without marriage) for 18 years now.
I totally believe in marriage, it's just not for us right now.

My sister has an interesting system. If you still have all your mail delivered to our parents address, your still just sleeping over at the boyfriend's.

For almost ten years?? Hahhahahhahhahhahh.


[on-topic] Wasn't sister Ashlee's living with her boyfriend? The Simpson-clan are so inconsistant in their levels of hypocrass'y.[/ot] (spelling intended)

And my brother and sister and I, likewise, never acknowledged the fact that my parents have had sex more than three times in their entire marriage. I do believe it's some sort of dual unspoken rule.



I cannot agree more, schoolzout. My boyfriend is the same way, and pointed out that that's why most men do stuff for women, like pulling out their chairs or helping them with their coats and opening up doors, putting their arm around them. Men like to, in a way, take care of their women and be the strong, dependable, noble one, but really only to the extent of being a gentleman. "Intelligence and independence is sexy," he says, "cluelessness and helplessness to an extent can be endearing. But Jessica is neither neither intelligent nor independent. She's not like having a wife, she's an extra child."

Watching tonight's epi, and I have a few questions:

- is MTV so devoid of storylines for this show that they devote way too much time to the question of what animal is using Nick and Jessica's backyard as a rest stop? And do we really care? Um, no.

- How long before Nick is banging CaCee??

I didn't know whether not posting info before the show is over applies to the sub-genre threads, but I figured it's okay so long as I'm not posting spoiler info. I apologize in advance to the mods if I'm breaking any rules.

On the subject of Chritian (not christian catholic) land and marriage:

I grew up in church. My dads a minister. He marries people.

-I dont wanna get all into this with a huge entry or anything but i'll say this. Maybe Jessica's family was once a normal christian family with christian values, but as of now, the things she does and the way they act on tv (nonetheless) aren't very christian (obviously). True, we try not to judge because who are we to judge? But seriously, it's kinda obvious that the whole big christian values and morals thing for them is second place to their money and fame. I think they just use it whenever it's of their convenience. Which is kinda sad 'cause they not only make themselves look like complete hypocrites, but they give the whole 'Christian Land' a bad name.

-Depending on what pastor or priest you go to, they'll either marry you or not. Some have standards, others are picky, and others dont really care. My dad (a pastor) has married some people that a priest wont marry, or he'll marry them 'cause they don't have enough money for the catholic church to marry them. In other cases he simply won't marry a couple 'cause of his standards, but he'll refer them to some other of his pastor friends that he think will marry them. He'll always hook them up and never leave them alone without anyone to marry them. Everything just depends on each case.



-You'll find this is pretty much standard in ministers (or leaders of the church, or just plain ol' christians) homes. It's true. No matter how old you are, you're under their roof, they have these kinda rules.

....but pk's (prechers kid) will somehow always find a way around this during their teenage years lol.

Jess crossed over tonight on Asslee's show. For those who didn't see it, we now know what she and KaCee did after the restaurant on the day of their eye surgery. They went to Asslee's first "concert," naturally. I mean, why go home and lay down per doctor's orders when you can watch your sister screetch at the top of her lungs and wiggle her ass in the face of the guitar player?

Jess did look pretty funny in the audience wearing those stupid eye blinder things, though. Hee. (Nick and KaCee were also there, in case you were wondering).

Hah! I had the exact same thought - just moments before CaCee said, at the restaurant, "Ahhhhm gonna hafta sleep wit' y'all to-nite!" It wasn't even subtle.

I also thought there was potential comic gold if the poo in the yard had turned out to be from a papparazzi. But alas.

Who in the world discusses unidentified feces while dining in a restaurant?

I think we have a winner for the most boring episode of Newlyweds ever. I stopped watching midway through and did the dishes. And I HATE to do the dishes. Please tell me this means Jessucka is on minute 14.

Heh. No joke. Come join the Methodists... where the sinnin's easy.

I don't have much to say about tonight's episode except Nick's got sexy hands.

Poor whipped bastard.

HAHAHAHAHA!

Hey K-C?!?! GO AWAY! I'm single, so it's not like I don't understand sometimes hanging out with married friends, but at the same time I don't live with, go out to dinner with every night and go on vacation with NOTHING BUT one or two married couples.

Notice how Nick's immediate response was, "Now we're gettin' somewhere."

Why did Nick feel compelled to shorten the legs of his "very expensive" table? It didn't look too high for that spot and DIY is never a good idea when it comes to cutting up your furniture.

Tony downing the Tums -- very funny. You know dealing with Jessica and her nonsense upsets his stomach. Also funny, the yawning and the checking the watch.

Their bodyguard looks like Keith from Six Feet Under.

Hee!

I'm so glad Jessica talked in her widdle baby voice for Nick. I can see how much he loves it. Twue wuv, ain't it grand?

LMAO watching CaCee have to sit through Jessica's Escada shopping spree, looking at 30 or so outfits that she will never be able to buy.

Nick and Jessica have some pretty well off friends. Looked like the couple was maybe at most early 30s, yet they're living in a huge house that's well furnished. Laughed at the 100 or so kids waiting so politely outside the door for Jessica to come out, followed by her "this happens to us all the time".

Did anyone understand what happened at the Derby? Did Nick place two bets one on Smarty Jones for Jessica, and one for himself on the field? The previews made it seem like they lost a lot of money, but all we saw was Nick pulling for Smarty Jones, which would mean he lost his bet.