Is there a mutant that kills people by shrieking at them? Or does she not want to be type-cast?

The writer actually said that, not Jessica. Apparently she visited an orphanage in Mexico a lot growing up.

What a ho-bag! We all know she only wants to adopt because that is the cool hollywood thing to do now.

That brings back funny memories of when Jessica Alba played her on Mad-TV. She ended up sending the baby back to "china or wherever Korean babies come from"
It was hysterical.

hmm moving and renewing their vows...maybe they are going for that whole let's start again thing.

And yes Lea was a Rockett, I don't know about the height requirements or anything but thats is just what I was told.

I thought I couldn't hate her more -- but this takes the proverbial cake. What's wrong with adopting a child from America? Did we run out? Why does the adoptee have to be from an "underdeveloped" country? Not that there's anything wrong with that for the right reason. And in Jessucka's case, I'm sure her primary reasons had more to do with personal P.R. than actual benevolence.

According to this, a Rockette has to be between 5' 5.5" and 5'9".

Well Nick's mom adopted 4 or 5 kids so I can see why he would want to do it, but I highly doubt Jessica is doing it for the "right reasons" I can see her getting another reality show called "Adopting a Baby: Jessica Simpson becomes unselfish for a day"

Looks like Jess is the one who wants to adopt, according to tonight's epi...if that articles is right, it sounds like once again, she's convinced Nick to give her her way!

Why does CaCee have to come along on a COUPLES trip with one's of Nick's old friends? Is the girl not capable of spending two days alone?

Sweatpants and stripper heels. What an outfit. Classy!

I'm not shocked, but in the brief scenes we saw of them tonight, the Lachey clan seems so much more normal than the Simpsons. God bless 'em.

Notice Jessica managed to get out of actually diapering Mason.

I couldn't tell if the editing team dubbed it in or it was real, but I loved that Mason was all happy and smiling with Nick and when given to Jessica he started to cry.

Mahi Mahi is dolphin? Dolphins are air breathing mammals, not fish. If Mahi Mahi are fish there is no way they could be part of the dolphin family. And was that the same waiter who said he was gay in the other episode?

Who is the guy that Jess dated that she said was on Days and also dated Leann Rymes. I thought it was Andrew Keegan but on IMDB it doesn't say that he was on Days.

I think the baby crying was dubbed in. They never showed his face when she picked him up. And who is that guy she dated? I know she dated a choreographer, but I don't remember him being on Days.

The guy from Days that Leann Rimes dated was Jensen Ackles, but I don't remember hearing of Jessucka ever dating him.

I missed the episode, but Mahi Mahi are the fish that is called dolphin, different from the mammalian dolphin.

they will probably adopt from an "underdeveloped country" because it is a lot quicker, not nearly as much red tape, and they can get a baby. That is why most people are going out of the country. Yes, you can get a baby but by the time you have gone through the red tape, three years of court(an exaggeration but you get the point) because the mother or father can't make up their mind whether they want the baby or not, and then finally you get the kid it is already five or six years old. Been there done that. And there is no one to blame but the government for why there are so many kids in the foster system right now.

I only caught like half of the episode, but was that Nick's mom sitting at the table at the end? If so, it was nice to see some Lacheys, instead of the incestuous Simpsons.

And correct me if I'm wrong, but was that Lea in the previews? If so, yay! I missed Drew and Lea.

I'm also voting for totally dubbed in. Her face didn't show any negative reaction, and they never showed the baby's face.

This episode was boring. Picking out nail polish, bad golfing, a baby pooping - yawn. I wanted to see KC get her moustashe waxed.

Especially it was was going to go deliciously wrong.

This is the first episode I have seen this season. Now I remember why I stopped watching it. Yawn, let's watch Nick and some guy golf and swear. Woo hoo let's watch Jessica and her "assistant" suntan all day (for someone who is so concerned with her looks, she sure does bake in the sun a lot. She's going to look tough by the time she's 30). Ugh on her "Flag Day . . . there's a day just for flags?????" comment.

I was born on flag day (June 14th) so that pissed me off!

And it's Albanyparents' wedding anniversary, so me too.

If Mahi Mahi is dolphin that means Jessica actually got something right. The statistical possibility was so infinitesimal I couldn't believe it.

Well that link a few posts up says it is "dolphin fish" not actual dolphins as in porpoises. So she was only half right.

A very blah episode indeed.

Why do Nick and Jessica need to adopt a baby when they already have a rather large one named Cacee? Seriously, why does this girl hang around her wherever they go? Anyone read anywhere how much they pay her to be an "assistant"? Not only that, but they have to pay for everything else of hers - plane tickets, spas, restaurants, etc.

Next week's episode with them at the Kentucky Derby looks like it'll be so funny. I loved the "did you bet a lot?" question right at the end and Nick's face.

The most shocking part of tonight's episode was that Ma and Pa Simpson didn't come along on the trip with them! That's a first.

I actually thought Nick and Jessica were cute with the baby. I almost expected her to be like "How do you change a diaper? Ewww eww eewwww!"

Loved this:
Jessica: "Can't he chew on some other toy or something?"
Nick: "Uh, I think he's eyeing two toys right now" [shot to Jessica's breasts]

that had me laughing so hard.

And I rewatched the Palm Springs episode today just so I could see the pickle thing again. :D :D :D :D Hilarious.

Mahi Mahi is dauphin, not dolphin. It's a fish.

I agree this one was a little slow.

• So, Nick wants to be a Big Brother. He's such a good guy. Interesting to hear that lady say they have other "Bigs" from the industry. What a thrill that must be for the little brothers.
  
• Has Nick mentioned his fraternity affiliation before? What is it? I've never noticed him wearing his letters.
  
• I laughed at Nick and his buddy buying more and more beers to improve their golf game.
  
• Jessica has never changed a diaper before?! What did she do to earn spending money when she was a teenager?
  
• The nail polish selection process really dragged. That footage belonged on the cutting room floor.

Thanks for posting that. I could only think of Andrew Keegan and I knew he wasn't on Days. JAckles and Jessica would have been the most Barbie & Ken couple ever.

Tony cracked me up when he commented that they "almost dropped down to the legal limit for a sec" while they were golfing. Nick taking 5 shots to get out of the sand trap entertained me, too. I wasn't bored by the golf footage like most people.

Please tell me I misheard Jessica when she said, "You're looking at it like you can't wait" to Nick about Mason when they were getting ready to babysit.

Nick was in SAE at Miami U

I really have nothing to say on this episode except I need to move out of Arizona now. It's been tainted.

I must say that only Nick could make what I consider to be The World's Dullest Sport seem fun and interesting.

But the outta control hair isn't working for me.

Nick was adorable with Mason. And Mason was too, too darling. And already has good taste, given the preference for Nick over Jessica. I was particularly fond of Nick's "thumbs up" to Mason when the baby was yanking Jessica's hair. Hee.

It's the heir to France?

The waiter agreed it was a kind of dolphin so Jessica can say she was right for once. I don't think she's going to care about the technicalities. All fish is the same to me, can't stand any of it.

I started yelling at the tv when I saw them lying out and drinking beer. That's just asking to get dehydrated.

I started yelling for them to put a hat on that baby, not just sunscreen.

Thanks, verucasalty.

Heh. Sorry to get all pedantic, but...more about the difference between a dolphin, a dolphinfish (a.k.a. Mahi Mahi, scroll on down), and a dauphin.





That totally works, y'all.

Think about it. Would you want her alone in your house for more than 10 minutes?

Tony was the most interesting part of the entire episode.

That was quite possibly the cutest child ever!

Was it just me or where there quite a few boob shots tonight. Tits-o-rama! Plus unaltered, natural, size D boobs don't sit up like that when you're laying on your back with the straps taken off of your swim suit.

How uncomfortable for two of Nick's friends to have to tote around CaCee all day. I just don't get it. How much personal assisting does Jessica need on vacation?

Thank you quickychick. I used to work in a seafood restaraunt and trying to explain the difference between dolphin-fish and actual dolphins got extremely old. They are two different things and that waiter in AZ should have known better.

How cute was that baby? It was pretty clear that they dubbed in the crying when Jessica was holding him. Looked like Nick adored him.

Gah. The more Light they drink, the more money they make. So you go, Nick, hung over on a sunny golf course in Arizona, with your two beers!

That baby was the cutest thing evah!

A boring episode, and why why WHY bring CaCee on a trip to visit close friends? Easter was bad enough, but if my friends brought their worthless leech of an assistant along on a trip to visit me, she'd be staying in the garage. I bet she didn't pay for all those spa treatments.

I watched this episode with my few-months-older-than Mason son. He's not as picky as most of us with his television watching-- just having another baby on-screen for fifteen minutes made it interesting. (Mason is cute, but my E is much cuter. Hee.)

I don't think anyone mentioned the great beginning scene yet... Nick explaining why he wanted to have their own children before adopting.

JESSICA: "But don't you think we should... adopt? So we can figure it out before we have to do our own?"
NICK: "See, I look at it the opposite way. We should have our own children and raise them, and then when we're experts at parenting, adopt other children that might need more love and understanding.... Do you know what I'm saying?"
JESSICA: [blank] "....No."

She has this expression like the conversation was only expected to go one way, and her brain overloaded at the possibility of Nick having his own, well-formed opinion.

Personally, I think Nick wants his own first in case Jessica decides she only wants one. If parenting proves to be too much for her (and it will), he'll either be left with a biological child or adopted child; and I think he'd prefer a Mini-Nick.

They filmed her ironing her own outfit when she & Nick went back to Cincinnati for his grandmother's wedding. I remember being shocked that she knew how.


Maybe they need to stop charging so goddamn much for tickets.

and...DANG this forum has gotten busy!

I have been wondering what in the heck a dauphin was. My questions are answered. Now I know it's not just a county in Pennsylvania. See, I learned something by watching Newlyweds. Jess IS edumacating the world one person at a time. ;)

I finally caught up on this show, and wow. The mother is all kinds of annoying. "Isn't there Kraft service here?" Good lord, lady. Shut up. Pa Simpson is horrendously skeevy, but I actually felt a tad bad for him when he was trying to explain what Passover was, and those morons kept interrupting him with their stupid comments.

That kid was adorable.

It was good to see Nick's family and friends in this episode. She tones the dumb factor down when she is around them.

Cacee is shady. She had no business on that trip. Did anyone notice she was wearing Nick's hat when they were lying around the pool. That just irked me.
Jessica is being played by her.

Apparently I missed this. So she's saying adopting a kid is like practice, and if you screw up, it's okay, because it's not your own? Or if you can't hack it, you can just return it to the baby store?

"Ew, this one's defective or something, because it won't stop crying! Can I have a quiet one that doesn't poop?"

What she said was that maybe they should adopt first because of all the issues that go along with it.

I don't know what this means but that is what she said.

They definitely dubbed in all of the crying when Mason was with Jessica, apart from the time that she was in the baby’s room when everyone else was outside. You'd think the moronic editors would try to not make it so obvious, even my little brother who has never watch Newlyweds said, "I bet the baby's not actually crying, they probably just recorded it from before."



No, I noticed that too. There was a lot of boobage in this episode and the last one in Palm Springs. While I'm on that topic, can I just say that from this point forward that I refuse to believe that Joe Simpson was ever a Christian minister of any kind. I'm sorry, I know they're not Jewish, but I'm Catholic and I know what the hell Passover is, and what a plague is, and the Angel of Death, and all that shit, and I refuse to believe that anyone who claims to have that much religious affiliation has no idea what Passover is. Joe wasn't even telling the story right from what he was saying, and if he really is a minister who preached from a pulpit, then his daughters should have at least some idea of what a plague is. No Jessica, in religious terminology, it is not a "curse", but a divine chatisement. She is such an embarassment, as is Asslee. "I don't know much about the Bible" ???. Child, you don't know much of anything. How come they never show these people mention going to Church if they are supposedly so religious?



She’s a fucking moron. And she's being selfish. If she fucks up another child trying to "learn" how to be a parent, that's not good, but it's perfectly okay to fuck up a poor defenseless child who's already had a tough life. Nick’s got the right idea. For one, by the time they got to adopting a child, they would have to wait a few years before having a biological child of their own after adopting so it wouldn’t be too much "stress" for Jess, so Nick would be well onto his way to 40 by then.

I think she should get a fish - she may be able to handle that


They should wait 5 or 10 years before they are responsible for children

I'm surprised no one's mentioned that Cacee tagged along with Nick and Jessica's friends on the spa trip while they stayed to baby-sit Mason. God talk about a third wheel. Maybe I missed it, but I'm guessing they really didn't want her along. Can she not get a hint??? I keep thinking back to the first episode when she was saying "Maybe I should get a hotel." and I actually felt slightly bad for her because I thought she had a guilty conscience. But now it's clear she said that knowing Jessica would refuse it, and it gave her all the more time to mooch off them.

And I'm not sure who mentioned it, but I too was pissed at those parents for not putting a hat on Mason. It's Arizona damnit! No wonder his cheeks were so damn red. But other than that, they seemed pretty normal and cool.

I can't wait for next week, a Drew and Lea episode yeah!!! And from the looks of it, Cacee is not there! Woo hoo!

"And it doesnt close its eyes when I lay it down!! My dolls all did that, why cant this one!"

It bothered me that in the previews for this week, all they showed was "Jessica takes care of a baby. Look at Jessica make a stinky face. Look at baby pull Jessica's hair," and didn't show anything about Nick and the Big Brother stuff. I hope there is more of that to come in future episodes.

They were so hoping for a new TunaOfTheSea Moment there with the dolphin/mahi mahi.

I agree that the baby editing was stupid. They could have at least used a shot where the baby was actually crying when Jessica held him. I'm sure it happened.

I did like the part where they were listening in on the baby monitor and cracking up. I felt like Nick's reaction was really genuine and funny.

And yeah, Ivana Tinkle (hehe!) why was Cacee on that spa trip? That bugged me, too. I wonder if they'd even met her before the trip. Maybe one day she'll find a great guy like Nick...pause... or Tony. Surprised they didn't cover her breakup more.