FfrauleinN, the Subservient Chicken has no noise. Just a guy in a creepy chicken suit.

That site rocks! My favorite command is "yoga"

Others have mentioned these ads before, but my hate is fresh and insistent. Die, IBM, die and take your god damned Thinkpad, big blue banner at top and bottom of the screen, intense corporate wisdom for the ages, still living in the Reagan 80s, fucking ads with you. GAH! I hate every one of their &"*$# ads!

I have read back about 100 pages, and although there was much talk of the feminine hygeine products, this one was not mentioned:

The new add for Carefree pantyliners. The woman is walking through a sidewalk cafe (or something?) and says "my grandmother always told me to wear clean underwear in case I got hit by a bus" shot of flirty-look-hot-guy "I can think of a much better reason" uh...being a skank? Your grandmother would be proud.

A couple of things hit me about this commercial. First who takes someone they have never met from a random cafe, straight to bed? Seriously (monkey). Not even "Hey pick me up at 8". Secondly, are they saying if you don't use carefree, you'll have skanky-ass panties, and that by the time you bed your newly-found partner, he'll be squicked out by the plantlife growing in the organisms within said skanky-panties?

Okay. And so ends the TMI, overthinking part of my rant. Thank you.

This? Was hilarious.

And I haven't seen that commercial.

ETA: Oh, I wanted to say that I've seen some new Herbal Essence commercials on MTV. They're very cheesy, but at least they do not feature women having orgasms from their hair care products.

Are these the Pepperidge Farm goldfish and is this replacing the ad with the folk song? I'm not sure I'm going to like this one...

I have not seen the Carefree commercial (thank Jeebus), but what they're tryiing to imply is stupid. My panty-drawers can be non-skanky even if I don't use their damn brand of pantyliners, so there! Also, are they trying to say that hoo-hoo hygiene only matters when you're picking up random men at sidewalk cafes? Shut up, Carefree.

Yes, I believe they are Pepperidge Farms.

Also, if that's the case, don't you think that your potential date/client would be just as squicked out to find said organisms growing on your skanky, bunched-up pantyliner? So what, before you jump in the sack your're going to say "Just a minute!" run to the bathroom and remove said recepticle for all your icky hoo-hoo grossness? If so, and you're that concerned, why not just cary around a clean pair of underwear and change into them before stripping in front of a strager.

Hee!


I haven't seen anyone mention the Progressive Comb Over Guy ad. I like it. Way to go, Douglas. Way to go.

add_duck, that is something else to consider. If your leaking, or fertilizing, or whatever down there, don't you think you would go clean up anyway?

And really, do I need to see this commercial in all its skanky-forest-hoo-hoo glory during EVERY FREAKING COMMERCIAL BREAK.



Word

I agree. It's far better than the Progressive ad with the guy buying his mom a different cake for her birthday. I kept thinking to myself that maybe his mom enjoyed getting the same cake year after year; that the regularity and tradition of it made her feel closer to her son. Now, just because he's saving on car insurance, he's going to blow his money on an expensive cake that has no sentimental value to his mom at all, completely breaking her heart.

No, I don't overthink commercials at all.

I hate the commercial for "Blondies", I think it a shampoo, and specially the two "singers" on it. Their voices and singing are torture to me. Maybe I am not hip with popular singers and music, but are they, "Alex and Nik", actually singers. Or are they just the "poor man's" Hilton sisters, which is even sadder.

Try "pilates" - IMO, they sort of confused pilates with yoga (the chicken sits in a cross-legged position and "meditates"), but it's all good!

Oh dear...yet another unsuspecting soul sucked in by the Sheer Blond Twits. I can't bear to tell you, DSN.


BWAH! I think both is hilarious--either Clear Channel realizes what a farce that marriage is and someone's got a TWoP gene in them over there or if it's coincidence, that's just karma kicking Nick and Jessica's ass. Either way, it gets a big fat HEE! from me.

I DEMAND a T-shirt with this on it.

I saw Matthew fuckin' Lesko's commercial last night. The man has sure aged, but his annoying ass voice hasn't. This time, it sounds like he has a sore throat, but still insists on screaming at me at 2:00 AM.

DSN, those are the "Sheer Blonde" twits, and we hate them, we hate them, we hate them, yes we do.

Oy, the Sheer Blonde twits are back. I wish they'd call me to do a Brilliant Brunette commercial for the new line for brown haired people. It would start with me, smiling as I hold up Alex's and Brit's heads on a spike. I love you, yes I do!

In other news, if you tell the Chicken to do something repeatedly, he'll change it up. Try "eat a taco." Around the third time, another person will join him!

Bet that woke your ass up but good. Hee.

Why are the Sheer Blonde twits back? What did we do to deserve this?

I see I'm not the only one who was up watching Three's Company reruns last night...


Ah, the Sheer Blonde twits. Even more twittish, is that the commercials are inaccurate. It's not the chlorine in pool water that turns blonde hair green, it's the copper used in algaecides that turns your hair green. And seriously (monkey), where's the shampoo for my prematurely grey hair? Why should blondes, brunettes and redheads have all the special product?

But I digress. Finally saw the KFC Subservient Chicken ad. I have only two words to describe this: Uber.Creepy.

edited because it's good to spell "inaccurate" accurately.

Weird. New series of ads, with people talking about all the good things they do - first was a kid, second was a mom. They take care of their family, play baseball, work on charities, whatever. Sounds like a PSA, until the end: "I'm a diabetic".

Yeah? It's a disease, it's not a character flaw; you don't have to justify your existence.

(It's not a diabetes PSA, it's an ad for the test device)

Jamoche - that commericial is all kinds of suck. The first time I saw it, I kept expecting it to be one of those faux-commercials for Geico. At least then, it would've been entertaining.

The Burger King subservient chicken ad (and website) is genius, IMHO. Cracks me up.

HA! I see a Pixel Challenge entry here somehow...

Hee. I just .. saw the chicken ... hee. Made him do the running man and pray. How can something be both alarming and hilarious?

I made the Subservient Chicken play during class. My classmates were laughing so hard, the professor kept throwing us nasty glances.

And you guys are so creative. I asked him stupid things, like sit down, go to sleep, walk around, hide.

I'm going to have to use your suggestions.

I just saw a commercial for a bunch of bored guys at Lazarus/Macy's. Poor guys. I'd never do that to my husband. (What's the point? He just gives me "the look")

Also, the chicken's cha cha...hilarious!

Ask and ye shall receive, screamapillar.

(I hope that's what you meant!)

Hee! screamapiller - Big. Fat. WORD! I shut it off after Lee Tripper said he was going out on a "second date" with Chrissy. I feared that Matthew Lesko would be returning to my screen shortly!

Here's an article about everybody's favorite chicken.

I don't like either of the Progressive Ads. I really think that guy looked better with his hair.

There's a TV ad too?

woohoo! Thanks, jennifuh! Now if only someone would make a commercial with a bunch of women with grey hair, I'd be so psyched.





Not to worry, ChinkyGirl - Matthew Lesko only gets to annoy the NY Tri-State once that hour (I watched the rest of 3's Co. and the Odd Couple rerun right after), but there is that unbelievably annoying 1-800-LAWYER guy whose super ugly mustache that's a cross between Snidely Whiplash's and Freddie Mercury's...

Has anyone seen the commercial for the Playtex Beyond tampons? The commercial's not really that bad, these women are doing various activities, like sitting in a blow up wading pool and the voice over says something like, "Playtex beyond comfort". I however, keep waiting for the voice to say "Playtex, beyond the hoo hoo."

Sadly, I will now and forever be calling these Batman Beyond tampons.

that is all.

Ohhh....so that's why he's wearing a garter belt. Gotcha. Still weird, though.

Hee! The mustache annoys me too! Good to know Lesko's schedule around here!

And what about those stupid dating hotline commercials? What's it called? Lava Life? Stupidest thing ever. Gee, they make those people sound so appealing. NOT!

ETA: Hey...someone tell the chicken to "find WMD". He runs around frantically, goes behind the couch, and I think he holds up something, but I'm not sure...it's a bit grainy. The hell?

Do they send out a hoo-hoo signal when they need to be changed?

"Holy Guadalcanal, Batman! To the Ginamobile!"

*aaaugh...choking on Dorito...*

Oh, my dog. That was funny. Explains why it's "The Red Phone," doesn't it?

Oh. My. GOD! The LavaLife commercial is on right now.. I swear, who ever wrote this stuff should be clubbed over the head for stupidity!

The commercial says: "Mike heads up an IT Department, loves animals, and romantic walks to the convenience store".

My brain's translation of this? "Mike spends all day on computers,has a pet rat/iguana/some other pet I would run away from, and will take you to the Kwik-E-Mart for a Jumbo Squishee on your date." Dreamy!

eta

Do they send out a hoo-hoo signal when they need to be changed?

"Holy Guadalcanal, Batman! To the Ginamobile!"

hee!

OK, I've got two good ones, and one that makes me grind my teeth.

Good one #1: Starts off like any other lawyer ad, with a guy in a spiffy suit in front of a huge floor-to-ceiling bookcase filled with big thick lawbooks, blathering on about "if you need a lawyer..." He takes one of the books off the shelf above his head, and the whole bookcase tips over on him. Next shot is looking over the top of the desk at the back of the bookcase (with the lawyer guy underneath it, clearly) and his hand comes up from below the desk, picks up the reciever of the phone, and dials a number. The voice on the other end of the phone answers: "Lawton and Cates..." Voice over: "Lawton and Cates, the lawyer's lawyer." End of commercial. I don't know why I like it so much, I just do.

Good one #2: Matress store. Joe Guy-next-door racked out on one of the display matresses. He wakes up, sits up all bleary-eyed and bed-headed and bed-faced. Mattress sales guy is sitting on the next display model over with a coffee mug in his hand. Sleepy Dude says "Wha happened?" Sales Dude say "I warned you. It's a Sealy." Sleepy Dude: "When was that?" Sales Dude: "Yesterday. Coffee?" and holds out the coffee mug. Sales Dude is so deadpan, and Sleepy Dude is so befuddled, that it's great. It's the "Coffee?" that makes it art.

Toothgrinder: "Hidden Valley goes to cheese country" for reaction to their salad dressing. Lots of shots of people wearing cheeseheads and talking about how great the salad dressing is. Horrible part? Cheeseheads are Wisconsin; every single one of these people is talking with a Fargo-esque Minnesota/Upper Great Plains accent! "Yah, sure." "Yoo betcha." "Doncha noe?" Minnesota folks, as a rule, don't wear cheeseheads, (It's a Green Bay Packers/Minnesota Vikings thing) and Wisconsinites, as a rule, don't have that accent. Just grrrrrr. Stupid coastal ad agency twits who figure that all fly-over country is the same and nobody cares.

I just saw a commercial for the 2004 Ford Escalade. The commercial is nothing to write home about (or even snark on), but I want to know the song. It's this infectious guitar rif that soulds kind of jazzy. I want to know this song. I heart this song.

eta: I've seen the Sea Lion with the "failure to communicate" and he's really funny. The poor thing seems like he's really, really trying to make a point.

I keep seeing this commercial with a little girl explaining why the sky is blue. It was really cute the first time I saw it, but now I see it every. single. commercial. break. And it's not "awww" inducing anymore...it's "vomit" inducing.

HAHAHA...that is fuckin' hilARious!

Anyone else remember back in the dark days before message boards and chatrooms? (Ok, before they were available to the unwashed masses...) They had telephone chat lines. You could call some phone number and join the party line. They had TV commercials and everything. Anyone else remember those? Anyone?



A lawyer getting smunched? What's not to like?

I finally saw the "Survivor" tampons ad. Ugh...

Out of curiosity, since I've never seen it, it it actually women from Survivor in the tampon ad? Or just women... surviving? If it is, why in the world would you bring tampons on that show? Even if I had to make it my luxery item, I'd be sure to bring birth control pills if I were ever on it because I'd be damned before I'd be willing to have my period where ever it is they strand me.

Oh yeah, I remember one that always ran late at night with every damn commerical break. The slogan was "Pick up the phoooooone!" with these girls singing it all seductively while picking up their phones. Once in awhile, if Mr. Btcpossee and I are watching something kind of skanky on TV, I throw it out there! That isn't really a party line, though (although I do remember those - shameful!).

Love the Sealy mattress ad where the salesman offers the bleary-eyed customer coffee.

Hee. Romantic walks? To the convenience store? How do you make that romantic? Dude, that's just ... sad. It sounds like one of the people on Mad TV's "Lowered Expectations" dating line.

OMG! Somebody else saw that? We used to walk around randomly cooing that all the time. (Now it's stuck in my head.) What were kids doing watching this? I think Love Connection was on, or something.

Oh yeah, those ubiquitous (heh) 1-900 phone ads. It seemed like they had numbers for everything from dating services to jokes-of-the-day to wacky!friends! back then. They pretty much died out after the 80's didn't they?

Thank you, rabrab! I understand that a Wisconsinite would have an accent from the perspective of someone from the south or Boston, etc. But, honestly, I can tell, people from Wisconsin, Illinois, Iowa do NOT have any accent. I seen articles that refer to the Midwest accent and I have no idea what the hell that means! If anything, we talk faster and maybe higher than others, but no discernable accent--so please leave us alone, ad guys! (P.S., in this ad, they might have accidentally wandered into the UP of Michigan--some people there have the yoo betcha, doncha noe accent).


I've seen this ad--they weird thing is it was a long, long time ago. It's strange to hear it's "back".

That chicken is freakin' creepy! So, why can't I stop giving him commands?
I am so going to have nightmares tonight.

Yeah, or the early 90s. I think 1989 or thereabouts was their peak. Like you said, there was everything from the phone "dating" [/euphemism] lines ("Let me be your friend on the other end!" "Big girls...yeah! Blonde girls...ooh!") to soap updates to recorded messages from then-big pop stars like New Kids on the Block. (I still remember Samantha Fox purring, "Call my line at 1-900-blahblah and maybe...just maybe...we can have some fun!")

Oy. I'd completely forgotten about those!

American Idol has been doing these product-placement music videos for some time now, but I hadn't thought much about it until they went all out last night, when we saw all the boys and girls in towels, in and around the tub, singing Splish-Splash, and playing with Clairol's Herbal Essence shampoos. Shall we call them "Commideos"?