Bach-us
Feb 17, 2004 @ 4:43 pm
FfrauleinN, if you're twelve, so am I.
I like the Brawny guys watching soaps, too. They make me think of those stories about football players watching soaps and reading romance novels.
charlieboo
Feb 17, 2004 @ 4:45 pm
He finally gives up in frustration and tosses the whole pack out the window.
Pan over to an Indian with a tear running down his cheek. It's two*two*two PSAs in one!
The most effective anti-smoking PSA I've seen is the guy who keeps a picture of his young daughter tucked in the pack's cellophane. VO says something like "I figure if the warning on the side doesn't stop me from smoking, the picture on the front will".
DoctorNeon
Feb 17, 2004 @ 4:51 pm
The finger job in the jelly hole
I've heard of kissing your boss's ass, and now, quoting a somebody far more witty than I, eating your boss's ass. Way to go, NutriGrain!! It's a good thing those oranges don't hit the lockers in that commercial, (where they're swimming in their own "blood") or I'd have a really tasteless joke ready to go. Something that rhymes with Bolden Flowers.
Lenono
Feb 17, 2004 @ 5:52 pm
Two things to comment on:
1. These may be Canadian-only, but the new anti-drug PSAs are worth commenting on. My personal favorite is the one with the group of pothead teens going through the drive-through window day after day causing trouble and being rude to the workers etc. Then one day they are peeling out of the drive-through and run right into a little girl on her cliché pink bike with streamers and spokey-dokeys. The camera then pans to show a lit joint burning away in the ashtray.
2. Secondly, regarding the whole “wireless bill” discussion a few pages back, there is a reason they phrase it that way. “Cellular” is actually an older technology that most companies do not use anymore. Phones have used various other technologies for years now, but the average consumer still refers to them as “cell phones”. There is no way a phone company would use that term however because they would essentially be mislabeling their products as being older technology. Although it may not be conversationally correct it is technically correct.
ubi
Feb 17, 2004 @ 6:26 pm
I agree with your assessment of the ad, but what bugs me more is that OJ has to now advertise itself as healthy thanks to that wonderful Atkins diet.
That peeves me to no end as well. Just what does one do to remove the starches from OJ? Do they have to de-sugarize it or something? Also, is that Jamie Lee Curtis doing the voiceover for that ad?
I can't figure out what kind of pants he's [John Scheider] wearing either.
Something with suspenders... but what's the deal with the red-tinted industrial safety goggles? That totally distracts me from what he's saying.
Pan over to an Indian with a tear running down his cheek. It's two*two*two PSAs in one!
I can never see that Native American littering PSA clip without remembering a not-so nice punchline to this one Red Meat cartoon.
"I knew he was part Native Amercian because he cried whenever someone littered!"My personal favorite is the one with the group of pothead teens going through the drive-through window day after day causing trouble and being rude to the workers etc. Then one day they are peeling out of the drive-through and run right into a little girl on her cliché pink bike with streamers and spokey-dokeys.
Oddly enough, however, the little girl is always at the same exact spot doing the same exact thing...
Sleestak Hunter
Feb 17, 2004 @ 6:42 pm
John Schneider is wearing skiing apparel (for some reason- well, for skiing one would assume) in those TV Land ads for their awards show. Maybe he just came in off the slopes or something. I dunno.
But, it's definitely skiing clothes...
cal331
Feb 17, 2004 @ 10:30 pm
Spokey-dokeys? I have never heard that before, but that is adorable. Heh.
The Air Force commercial where a guy dives over a short waterfall to rescue a backpack that fell from a white-water raft and ends up a scuba commando for the AF bugs me. I mean, did they get the backpack or not? They never say.
screamapiller
Feb 17, 2004 @ 11:31 pm
That Best Buy commerical? About wireless technology? With the marionette that eventually gets rid of his strings and runs through a field with a laptop while people sing "I'm free, I'm free..."?
scares.me.to.DEATH.
ChinkyGirl
Feb 18, 2004 @ 12:15 am
Awww, I'm actually kinda in love with the Best Buy marionette! But then again, I'm in love with pugs (esp. the Advair pug), and plenty of people find them gross ;)
screamapiller
Feb 18, 2004 @ 12:22 am
Aw, I love the Advair pug too, ChinkyGirl!
But that marionette? That thing scares me... as much as I hate to bring it up, cause we've talked about it in the "scarred for life" thread, it has shades of the tiki doll... aieeeeeeee!
eta let us never speak of the doll here again. go directly to the scarred for life thread. do not pass go. do not collect $200.
ChinkyGirl
Feb 18, 2004 @ 12:31 am
screamapiller - No. You. Didn't. Ahhhh! I still gotta see that damn movie, but the pics were scary enough!
OT: BTW, whenever I see your screen name, I think about another thing that was mentioned plenty of times in the scarred for life thread - the earwig episode of "Night Gallery". Quit spooking me out! ;)
screamapiller
Feb 18, 2004 @ 12:46 am
I'm telling you, ChinkyGirl, it's like I can't get away from that thing.
re: Night Gallery? Eeeew! Quit spooking me out back at you! : )
cronox5
Feb 18, 2004 @ 1:23 am
you know what commercial i find unintentionally hilarious?
The AutoZone commercial with Jesse James doing the selling.
If you ever watch Monster Garage, you know the commercial is exactly the opposite of him, and it shows. The forced cue card reading with absolutely no emotion gets me good.
West Coast Choppers can't be losing that much money.
thinkcwik
Feb 18, 2004 @ 1:47 am
I think screamapiller is my scary commercial twin. That marionette gives me the major heebie jeebies. He and Snuggle and that damn tiki doll. It's all about the fear of creatures moving about that shouldn't.
naugastyle
Feb 18, 2004 @ 2:08 am
This isn't strictly commercial-related, but does anyone know what happened with the "Jenny" Ebay listing? Yes, the sheer lunacy sucked me in, and now i'm wondering when it became an "Invalid item." Various other lame "Jenny" listings have dropped out. Possibly the sellers chose to end the auctions, or...is Ebay patrolling for false Jenny auctions now?
clichekitty
Feb 18, 2004 @ 3:06 am
ubi
Feb 18, 2004 @ 7:24 am
You know what commercial i find unintentionally hilarious?
The AutoZone commercial with Jesse James doing the selling.
If you ever watch Monster Garage, you know the commercial is exactly the opposite of him, and it shows. The forced cue card reading with absolutely no emotion gets me good.
I find the commercial funny because that (illegal?) car he drives in the ad reminds me of this ep of
CHIPs in which Larry Linseed (the actor who played Major "Ferret-Face" Burns in
MASH) played a man who was so pissed off at tailgaters that he built a device in the back of his car that sprayed sparks out of the back end of his car.
Other than that, I'm not impressed because Jesse strikes me as someone who thinks he's a bad-ass in that ad and AutoZone caters to the bouncing gheto car crowd. I never watched
Monster Garage, so I could be wrong about him.
I have yet to see that DOOMED!DOOMED!DOOMED! ad. Darnit.
charlieboo
Feb 18, 2004 @ 8:05 am
Eeeeeew! I am totally skeeved out by the Coke ad I saw last night. Sweaty guy comes in from playing b-ball and takes 2 cans from the fridge. He drinks one, and wipes the other can across his brow, stomach and then sticks it in his armpit. Then, his friend walks in and he tosses him the can and he starts drinking it.
I will never drink from a can again unless I personally remove it from the 6-pack holder!
Different topic: some props, please, to the Cash family, who have put their foot down and said they will never allow Johnny Cash's "Ring of Fire" to be used for a hemorroid commercial (this was seriously proposed to them!). Nice to see just a tiny bit of integrity left by certain artists.
And finally, a show for all of us PSA-hating TwOPers (read the first 2 paragraphs):
http://www.nytimes.com/2004/02/18/arts/tel...ion/18CHAP.html
Cass4
Feb 18, 2004 @ 8:42 am
I'm watching that contraceptive patch ad, with the attractive young women pulling their pants and bikini bottoms down to show they've applied the patch and are ready for a whole week of uninhibited sex, and I'm thinking, why is this an eeeew instead of a woo-hoo? It's not as if Mike Ditka is involved in any way, so it should be something of a turn-on.
Tornado25
Feb 18, 2004 @ 9:48 am
That peeves me to no end as well. Just what does one do to remove the starches from OJ? Do they have to de-sugarize it or something?
I don't think it's been re-done to be made Atkins-friendly. I think the point is because of all the Atkins nonsense, OJ now has to come out and explicitly say "just 'cause there's fructose in OJ, doesn't mean it's as bad for you as a fifth of moonshine a day". OJ is very good for you, regardless of whatever the hell is in it that doesn't comply with some wacko diet. The same can be said for zillions of other products.
It's absolutely absurd to me that suddenly because of the starch, bread is bad for you. Ok, maybe they don't say it's
bad for you, but it makes you fast. Puuhlease. And eating a de-bunned 1/3 lb cheeseburger is better? Yay, I lost weight, but my cholesterol is 385. D'oh!
screamapiller
Feb 18, 2004 @ 9:58 am
I think screamapiller is my scary commercial twin
Oh,
thinkcwik, when I was young, I SO wanted to be a twin! I'll even change my birthday...
It's all about the fear of creatures moving about that shouldn't.
You hit the nail right on the head. Seeing that marionette running across the field? Might as well be Chuckie running around with a butcher knife, as far as I'm concerned.
And don't even get me started on Snuggle with those dead, glassy eyes... yuck!
FfrauleinN
Feb 18, 2004 @ 10:14 am
Seeing that marionette running across the field? Might as well be Chuckie running around with a butcher knife, as far as I'm concerned.
Damn. Now I'm picturing that little bastard running about with a laptop in one hand and a knife in the other, slashing at people's heels.
I despise the Jumbone commercial.
Oh,
thank you. I thought I was the only one. It's like it's so awful it veers into amusing and cute territory ... and then right back into shitty and annoying.
He drinks one, and wipes the other can across his brow, stomach and then sticks it in his armpit. Then, his friend walks in and he tosses him the can and he starts drinking it.
Ewwwwww! That is so vile.
charlieboo
Feb 18, 2004 @ 10:27 am
Here's a question for any fellow over-the-hill NYC-area TwOPers: does anyone remember an ad from the late 1960's for a 2nd-hand fur store in NY? Somewhere on 47th Street or thereabouts.
I can picture the ad, and the lady with her blond bouffant do and mink swing coat, but can't remember the store or (I think) the catchy jingle they had.
Anyone?
ajra
Feb 18, 2004 @ 10:47 am
I have yet to see that DOOMED!DOOMED!DOOMED! ad. Darnit.
When you do, make sure you check out the guy in the back of the room. I love his DOOMED the most.
That Secret(?) commercial is back - the one with the StickUpHerAss selfish roommate who asks, "Did you wear my black blouse?" I know it's irrational; I know it's her blouse; I even know it's just a commercial, but I. Hate. Her. So. Much.
JenD
Feb 18, 2004 @ 10:49 am
That Secret(?) commercial is back - the one with the StickUpHerAss selfish roommate who asks, "Did you wear my black blouse?" I know it's irrational; I know it's her blouse; I even know it's just a commercial, but I. Hate. Her. So. Much.
But she was on Firefly, therefore....she's good.
ETA b/c quoting helps
Alexandria Bay
Feb 18, 2004 @ 11:00 am
Wireless, cell, mobiiiile, whatever, anything but "cellie." GAH! What dink thought that up? There isn't enough infantilization of our culture already? GAH!
Any chance up to his eyeballs in debt Stanley Johnson is related to Bob of Enzyte? Just thinking about the smile...
I second the thanks to fellow posters for the heads up on the Doomed!Doomed!Doomed! ad. Since it airs on a channel for people over the age of 17, I've actually seen it (unlike some of the tampon ads). Off to get a "hey you kids, off the lawn!" sign.
meknownothing
Feb 18, 2004 @ 11:14 am
Now that PBS has started their own self-promoting commercials (and I don't mean the "Brought to you with the help of ...." ones), I have nowhere on TV to escape to! I'm talking about the "Be more ...." ones, where a little skit goes on, and the spot ends with a single word:
"Be more ....."
A Don Quixote puppet cuts his strings, and rides his puppet horse through the audience and out the door.
".... independent."
Most of these make me go "what the heck was that?"
Penfold
Feb 18, 2004 @ 11:54 am
...anything but "cellie." GAH! What dink thought that up? There isn't enough infantilization of our culture already?
I've got your back on that one. Hubby? Mensies? Cellie? I think I'm going to barfy-warfy all over my shirty-wirty.
Now that PBS has started their own self-promoting commercials...I have nowhere on TV to escape to!
That's a shame, because PBS used to have some self-promoting commercials (different from the ones you describe) that were really clever. It would be a voiceover in a nature show type cadence and turned out to be a man in his backyard. Or it would be a girl spouting Shakespearean English and it turned out to be a normal teenager whining to her brother. Or it would be a couple of cowboys laying by the fire discussing the finer points of astronomy. I liked them a lot.
screamapiller
Feb 18, 2004 @ 12:21 pm
Here's a question for any fellow over-the-hill NYC-area TwOPers: does anyone remember an ad from the late 1960's for a 2nd-hand fur store in NY? Somewhere on 47th Street or thereabouts.
I can picture the ad, and the lady with her blond bouffant do and mink swing coat, but can't remember the store or (I think) the catchy jingle they had.
Charlieboo, my friends haven't dubbed me "the fountain of useless information" for nothing...
The tagline from the commercial of which you speak?
"The Ritz Thrift Shop. Some sell us their furs, others buy them."
I despise the Jumbone commercial.
Oh, thank you. I thought I was the only one. It's like it's so awful it veers into amusing and cute territory ... and then right back into shitty and annoying.
, you mean you wouldn't rather play a trombone? Now I'm going to have that freaking song stuck in my head. Must dig "Space Ghost's Musical Barbecue" CD out of my backpack immediately....
Seeing that marionette running across the field? Might as well be Chuckie running around with a butcher knife, as far as I'm concerned.
Damn. Now I'm picturing that little bastard running about with a laptop in one hand and a knife in the other, slashing at people's heels.
I see my work here is done.
Strawberryblonde
Feb 18, 2004 @ 12:24 pm
Wireless, cell, mobiiiile, whatever, anything but "cellie." GAH! What dink thought that up? There isn't enough infantilization of our culture already?
Alexandria Bay, you'd hate living in Australia. Just about
everything has a nickname. Sunglasses are "sunnies", a bathing suit is a "cossie" (short for costume, which is what they call them), present is "pressie", Christmas is "Chrissy", even the city of Brisbane is "Brissy."
bakaney
Feb 18, 2004 @ 12:35 pm
Okay, I hate the fact that "Blitzkrieg Bop" has been subjected to even further desecration by bringing back those silly cellphone commercials. Wasn't the first time sacrilegious enough? And then I see this:
Johnny Cash's family has blocked an attempt by advertisers to use his hit song Ring of Fire to promote haemorrhoid-relief products.
Okay, I may have let out a little Hee! but seriously, leave them songs alone!
And I too am dismayed by having the spongemonkey song edited to death. How will they get a record deal now? How?
And I am completely pissed off by the Crest Whitestrips commercial where some woman is doing that idiotic smile that one does only to blind people with the glare from their teeth. And then her friends keep saying that she's found a man or something. In that case, she might probably end up looking like The Joker on her wedding day.
dzdzsty
Feb 18, 2004 @ 12:57 pm
And I am completely pissed off by the Crest Whitestrips commercial where some woman is doing that idiotic smile that one does only to blind people with the glare from their teeth. And then her friends keep saying that she's found a man or something. In that case, she might probably end up looking like The Joker on her wedding day.
Hee! I hate this commercial, too, because if the "friends" were as close as the commercial is trying to portray them, they would have some clue who she was in love with! Plus, the Whitestrips girl is doing the irritating "what?" denial grin, which makes me want to smack her. I don't feel like I've really explained this well, but the commercial drives me nuts. Ick.
thinkcwik
Feb 18, 2004 @ 1:20 pm
Johnny Cash's family has blocked an attempt by advertisers to use his hit song Ring of Fire to promote haemorrhoid-relief products.
That song will never have the same meaning for me now. Hee! and ewww.
I have yet to see that DOOMED!DOOMED!DOOMED! ad. Darnit.
Me either. When does it usually air and what channels? I see that Ditek freak all the time, but not Doomed!
Screamapiller, you're younger, so let's go with your birthday. What with the marionettes and fabric softening bears moving about in commercials, if one of those cymbal clapping monkeys shows up I may never watch a commercial again.
FfrauleinN,
Damn. Now I'm picturing that little bastard running about with a laptop in one hand and a knife in the other, slashing at people's heels.
Thanks for the mental image that'll keep me up tonight.
FfrauleinN
Feb 18, 2004 @ 1:32 pm
Then
my work here is done. Heh.
I. Hate. Her. So. Much.
Really? Because I hate the thieving-ass roommate. Just because you didn't leave pit tracks in the shirt, that doesn't make absconding with it okay. I don't care what kind of deodorant you were wearing, the least you could do is wash is before returning it to my closet. Also, sand in my shoes? Not cool.
ETA:
cymbal clapping monkeys
Not. sleeping. tonight. Those things are as horrifying as a seemingly innocent talking doll. They're up to no good.
Tornado25
Feb 18, 2004 @ 1:53 pm
"The Ritz Thrift Shop. Some sell us their furs, others buy them."
What the hell is that? It doesn't even make sense. Thanks for the explanation of a thrift shop!
charlieboo
Feb 18, 2004 @ 1:59 pm
Screamapillar - thank you!!! Now I can sleep tonight :)
ETA: Tornado25: you could go and sell your old fur coat for a small amount of cash, then they turned around and re-sold 'em at a discount.
Hey, whaddya want? It was the 60's! But they used to run the ads constantly, using a grainy film of this woman walking down the street in her "new" fur! It seemed so glamorous when I was a kid - now I realize it was a glorified pawn shop.
trice77
Feb 18, 2004 @ 2:31 pm
I saw the cutest Swiffer commercial today. It starts out with Anne B. Davis (Alice from the Brady Bunch) looking into the camera and then diving into a pool. Then you see all these maids and butlers from old T.V. shows hanging out at this resort. Benson (from, well, Benson), Rosario(from Will and Grace), Florence(from the Jeffersons), and Geoffrey (from Fresh Prince of Bel Air). I guess the point being that Swiffer makes there jobs so easy that they have all this free time to relax like their rich bosses.
Bach-us
Feb 18, 2004 @ 3:03 pm
Where have you seen it, trice77? I've kept an eye out, but sadly all I've seen is the "Whip It" remake.
Alexandria Bay
Feb 18, 2004 @ 3:14 pm
Thanks, Penfold. It's good to know I'm not alone on the baby talk hate.
StrawberryBlonde, thank for the heads up but I'd already come to the conclusion that I never wanted to go to Australia. If I'd been uncertain, the pandemic of baby talking adults would've decided it, though. [shudder]
ladyDonna
Feb 18, 2004 @ 3:21 pm
Different topic: some props, please, to the Cash family, who have put their foot down and said they will never allow Johnny Cash's "Ring of Fire" to be used for a hemorroid commercial (this was seriously proposed to them!). Nice to see just a tiny bit of integrity left by certain artists.
Yeah, that's right, the guy-and-gal witty-morning-banter duo on the radio were talking about that. The guy on the radio said that this commercial has
actually been airing for about two weeks! Although the morning gal questioned, as do I, how the commercial folks could have gotten permission to use the song without the Cash family knowing about it.
Talk about walking the line, though--sheesh, they completely trampled all over it.
TraceyBee
Feb 18, 2004 @ 4:11 pm
And I am completely pissed off by the Crest Whitestrips commercial where some woman is doing that idiotic smile that one does only to blind people with the glare from their teeth.
I felt an overwhelming urge to break a few of those blinding white teeth with a well-placed hard roll. That woman is seriously annoying.
I thought I heard on NPR last week that it was the songwriter of "Ring of Fire" that approved its use for a hemorroid commercial. He used to use that "joke" when he sang the songs in concerts himself.
JHeaton
Feb 18, 2004 @ 5:25 pm
The guy on the radio was, in the fine tradition of morning show DJs, talking out of his ass. "Ring of Fire" was a collaboration between Merle Kilgore and June Carter Cash, so even if Kilgore did give his permission to use the song, the Cash family still gets a say.
charlieboo
Feb 18, 2004 @ 5:53 pm
I posted this waaaaaay back when, but seems appropriate to repeat again here. Chuck Negron, lead singer of 3 Dog Night, says in his concerts that he keeps waiting for Viagra to ask for the rights to "Easy to be Hard".!
kswat
Feb 18, 2004 @ 6:53 pm
I just saw that Swiffer commercial with the vacationing housekeepers-so cute. It was on during NBC Nightly News. I also saw the coupon spongemonkey commercial-I prefer the pepper bar version, but that's a pretty sweet deal to bring in any coupon from anywhere and they treat it like their coupons. Nice little spongemonkeys.
Vermicious Knid
Feb 18, 2004 @ 8:05 pm
"The Ritz Thrift Shop. Some sell us their furs, others buy them."
This must have been playing into the 70s because I'm sure I remember it. A very cultured, upper class voice, right?
Another blast from the past, "Phil Rizzutto for The Money Store".
screamapiller
Feb 18, 2004 @ 9:58 pm
This must have been playing into the 70s because I'm sure I remember it. A very cultured, upper class voice, right?
Another blast from the past, "Phil Rizzutto for The Money Store".
NICE... you gotta love the Scooter.
Vermicious Knid and
Charlieboo, methinks you probably remember Jim Palmer pitching for the Money Store?... and the old Shop-Rite Can Can ads with the chorus line? ... Crazy Eddie, Two Guys, and Korvettes?... and dare I say you might have seen an afternoon game of someone playing "PIX"? Hee hee hee!
cymbal clapping monkeys
aieeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! Bad enough I walked past a bunch of guys, wearing masks and making a bunch of marionettes dance to "Hey Ya" tonight while traversing the Port Authority Terminal, but now the cymbal clapping monkeys?
runs to kitchen, gets scotch out of cabinet, yanks the stopper out, has a belt, grabs cricket bat from corner, jumps into bed and pulls covers over her head....
naugastyle
Feb 18, 2004 @ 11:03 pm
Different topic: some props, please, to the Cash family, who have put their foot down and said they will never allow Johnny Cash's "Ring of Fire" to be used for a hemorroid commercial (this was seriously proposed to them!). Nice to see just a tiny bit of integrity left by certain artists.
That is HYSTERICAL! (Although--did the family rule out
all commercial endeavors or just this over-the-top offensive one?) I am genuinely impressed that the ad people can pitch something like this with a straight face. What other
completely suitable song-ad combos will they come up with? "Add it up" for Sylvan Learning Centers; "Hit me with your best shot" for the NRA; and of course "Laid" for the birth control patch.
That Secret(?) commercial is back - the one with the StickUpHerAss selfish roommate who asks, "Did you wear my black blouse?"
Like
FfrauleinN, I save all my hatred for the damn roommate who stole the blouse! It's amazing, but despite not being the most responsible person myself and therefore pretty relaxed on most things, I always end up living with people who were raised by wolves. So do not borrow my crap without asking. You're my roommate first, my friend a distant second, and imagine my room with a flashing neon "do not enter" sign. Covering it up with your damn magical anti-perspirant is just mean.
Whew. I swear I don't have a stick up my ass.
screamapiller
Feb 18, 2004 @ 11:26 pm
I always end up living with people who were raised by wolves
Actually, I would categorized roommates like the woman in the "did you borrow my blouse?" Secret commercial as having been raised in the wild by french poodles - loads of entitlement, no manners.
Tornado25
Feb 18, 2004 @ 11:46 pm
Ok, I've seen this ad enough now to comment on it. Despite what seems to a be a big-thumbs down on the Durango Hemi ads, I really like 'em! However, the most recent one, where they go to the psychologist kind of bugs because the husband talks about fishing and they show him standing in the lake holding the fish. Ok, all well and good. However, the Durango is there, too, driven forward into the lake, with the boat on the trailer attached! WTF?!? Everyone knows you back the rig into the water! Geez.
ChinkyGirl
Feb 19, 2004 @ 12:06 am
I think screamapiller is my scary commercial twin. That marionette gives me the major heebie jeebies. He and Snuggle and that damn tiki doll. It's all about the fear of creatures moving about that shouldn't.
But marionettes are supposed to move! Well, I still love that guy! But I guess I can see where the creepiness can set in - the little guy
does have this weird blank look to his face...
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