Frats: He's not happy...He's not a happy camel:)

I've said it b4 & I'll say it again, my all-time favorite for sheer venom & anger has to be:

Amie: "YOU'RE A FAT BITCH!" after Kim & Leslie steal their cabbie.

From TAR one the two most classic lines that stick out have already been mentioned, but I say it again just for kicks:
1. Swing, you fat bastard, Swing!
2. It's Namibia, jackass!

How about when Tian (I think? Maybe it was Jaree) claimed the only reason she wanted to go to India was because of the "tapestries," and she made it clear that she thought that tapestries were something that you WEAR rather than hang on the wall in a museum dedicated to medieval history, for example.

I do love it when the editors choose to show the racers' ignorance.

It was Jaree:)

Bumpage.

Brandon: "i'm afraid of um, crevices"

Charla: "that's the bad one"

Colin: "Don't drop the dead body, baby"

Twins: "we're clueless"

Mirna: "One student [ticket]"
Lance; "she's not a student"

Charla: "dig your ass, Mirna"

Mirna: "Chhhaaaarrrrllllllaaaaaa"

Phil (to twins): "The other teams just walked across that shallow bit there"

the list goes on and on and on....

"Mirna and Charla, I'm sorry to tell you you've both been eliminated from the race"

Chip: "No, no, I don't want to purchase all the accoutrements!"

from an earlier episode, Ka*i: "We're clueless."

Damn... Someone beat me to this one, so I will just add a very enthusiatic YAAAAY!!!

Linda (to Karen): "You outsmarted a cow!"
Karen (to Linda): "You out-ate a twin!"

I think the word accoutrements has struck a chord.

Mirna: "I'm going to die."

I kept on hoping she would. Hehe.

"There's nothing like a shopping mall to bring 2 freinds together"

Danny and Oswald, as they Cha their way arm in arm through Hong Kong



"We're going to lose this race because you stopped to take your pants off!"

Flo to Zach in Switzerland

Charla: (episode 2) What if have to stick my hand up a cow's rectum?
(episode 3) I just got Electrocuted.

Colin: I'm going to jail.


When I heard that uttered in the preview for episode 8, I couldn't shut up about it. Drove my parents batty, eventually they said "Yes, you ARE going to jail!" or something.
I'm just in no hurry to grow up, I guess. (Even though I turn 16 in November. Ehehe...)

Colin: Do you speak English?
Policeman: Yes, do you speak Swahili?

I know, you guys are probably sick of that one, but it makes me giggle every time I see it.

Brandon: I want to have kids!

Context is the key here. I took it out of context at first.

ETA:

Colin: I'm PACKIN' it!

From this weeks episode:
"Linda and Karen you are team number two" and the zorb is what the locals use for cheap thrills. Hee! Hee!

From Episode 10:

"Your kids are going to be so proud of you!!"

Have to say, I liked that line, too. The title quote was pretty good as well: "If they're screwing a helmet to my head... That can't be good."

Wait, does this mean I'm finding the moms entertaining? Oh, somebody shoot me, please.

I have to pick my fellow racer Tramel for my two favorites...

"chaka chaka...chak a nab? Why cant anything be called Detroit?"
and
"Yeah, well at least I got to pee though." after tipping their jet ski

I love ya TnT! Andrew

Post race favorite quote...
Caroline Rhea to me..."OH! Youve got that celebrity diva attitude!"
after i told her it was "ghetto" we had to sit in the audience and not come out from behind the celebrity entrance.

Then her band played
"Sweeeeet Andrew Hyde, dum dum dummm, Shouldnt take that donkey ride, Sweet Andrew Hyde"
as I got to have my own entrance from behind her curtain.

I think it is safe to say that many folks enjoyed this:

"My ox is broken! " - Colin, TAR 5, Leg 11- Outside of Manilla, Phillipines

Drew (TAR1): "He's three days older than kerosene, that guy".


Favorite exchange (DVD 'Side Trips', TAR1, standing outside the FF location in Paris):

Drew: "Kevin, is this like, are there, are there seats in there though?"

Kevin: "Well yeah, the last time I was here they had a couple of seats in there."

"Jonathan and Victoria, you're the last team to arrive. I'm sorry to tell you you've both been eliminated from the race."

Phil to Lori and Bolo: "You two just don't smell very good right now."
Lori: "You want a hug?"

Hopefully 20 days is a long enough time span for me to double post.

Flo: I don't work all day and all night... (Newsflash, Flo. You didn't work at all!)

Peggy or Claire referring to Phil: There's Dr. Doom.

Phil: Did you know it's illegal in Panama to wear underwear on top of underwear on top of pants. (How Phil managed to keep a straight face when he saw the Godlewskis is beyond me.)

Mary Jean: Oh these runs.

This one is from The Early Show, but I just love it. Phil to Joyce, referring to her having her head shaved: You looked so beautiful.

Decided I'd better edit, rather than triple posting...

Phil: Paolo family, you look ridiculous.
Phil: Tony, I had no idea what kind of support you had on this race, but now it's very evident.

Kim: (on a pre-race interview) What concerns me the most is dying!

Drew: I think my left testicle is rolling around the streets of Beijing.

Oswald: Take off your pants. No one's going to say anything.

Oswald: The last time I got this wet... I wasn't rowing.

Tramel: (to Talicia) We need to drive less like mommy and more like daddy.

Flo: Ian probably stopped to, like, bother some locals.

Kelly: (on eels at Roadblock) What do they feel like?
Jon: They feel like a slippery penis.
Kelly: Oh, I want to touch one.

Al: "Rapidito" doesn't mean "fast" in every language.

Jon: (riding elephant) Babe, I'm in so much pain.
Kelly: You are?! I've got a chain up my cookie!

Mirna: Can we play a quick hand of blackjack? We can double our money!
Charla: (snatching the clue) No!!!
Mirna: Come on Charla, let´s just...
Charla: Make you way to the PIT STOP!
(they both spazz out and run)

Alison: (regarding the dogs she's walking) Mine keep having sex!

Charla: I just got electrocuted!

Nicole (regarding the caviar) It's like swallowing a giant... loogie.

Karli: (picks up something in the sand) Is this a piece of poop, dried? EWW! (throws it away)

Charla: (points to goat) That's the evil one!

Karen: Where are we going?
Linda: To book tickets to Kenya, Nairobia. Or.. Nairobi, Kenya!

Colin: Oh my God. My ox is broken! This is bullshit!

Christie: It's okay, run them over!

Taxi Driver: Over 100 is prohibited here -- so we have no choice but to break the law!
Colin: Yeah.
Christie: Yes.
Colin & Christie: (in creepy unison) Good.

Lori: Accuracy? But with accuracy, you have to be accurate!

Victoria: We're not being Yielded and no one's yielding us.

Lena: We're putting lippy on because Phil is a choo-choo Charlie and a class-act.

Bolo: (counting the bears) Sixty-six! Sixty-eight! Eighty!

Aaron: I'm good at guiding asses. (points to Hayden) Just kidding!

Adam: Stop calling me "honey!"
Rebecca: All right, ass.

Rebecca: (regarding the taxi drivers) They're obviously not driven by money. There's some other force working here.

Adam: (regarding Kris and Jon) They're making out in the gondola.

Alex: When you're doing an eating challenge, the last thing you want to hear is "barf it up."

Gretchen: We're starting the "Save the Rhino Fund" and that's no "lyin'."

Ron: I was only committed to the military...
Kelly: And you got out of that one.
Ron: How?
Kelly: By being a P.O.W.!

"Fly to the top of elephant butt" Hee!

Heh. I think it was a sheep & the quote was: 'That's the bad one!'

Gretchen on the zipline... "Whoa, this is what the kids call wedgies!"

TAR2
Tara: "We're in a race for a million dollars."
Taxi Stand Guy: "I don't care, I'm not gettin' it."

TAR6
Hungarian Cabbie (to Jerkwad/Victoria): "Finito!"

"Hump it, Teri!"

Scariest quote: When Lisa or Joni (don't know which) said she was going to "unsheath [her] womanhood."

That is scary and possibly TMI...

"Oh my God, Meredith!" -- Gretchen, in every episode she was in (and I suspect a few she wasn't).

Yolanda (pondering the FF): "Hmm, an afterschool favorite. A game of football? Cricket?"
(cut to IN YOUR FACE shot of the bowl of crickets)

"Start thinking in your head" still cracks me up.

(Jeremy to Eric right before final roadblock)

Gretchen- "We have a baaaaad elephant!"

Yolanda- "Y'all should've picked your own damn detour!"

Yolanda- "Your mama got a pattern going."

BJ: "Can you do a dance for me? A lucky find the cluey dance?"
Tyler: "Did you say lucky find the cluey dance?"

And the classic...

"That's NAMIBIA, jackass!"

"We're New York Jews in Iceland!"

"It's like Frogger, dude" (either Tyler or James).

Duke: "Maybe tomorrow I can get a quick job..."

From TAR10, Episode 4:

Tyler: “I’m gonna see how much dong you got.”
James: “He’s honking for dong!”

Dustin/Kandice: “We’re here to pick up our dong.”

Mary: “If this Race gets any harder… I’m going to have to be Superwoman or something.”

Kandice: “Here… these crickets.”
*crickets buzzing*
Dustin: “Yeah, but I don’t know what that means.”

Mary (to cab driver): “I like you.”
David: “You ain’t taking him home.”
Mary: “But I love him, he’s so cool.”
Cab driver: *speaks Vietnamese*
Mary: “I luuve you!”

Cab driver: *speaks Vietnamese*
David: “I don’t speak your language dude!”

Terry: “Oh, its tight on my crotch.”

Lyn: “If you can have a baby without anesthesia, then you can go up this rock.”

Kimberly: “What is a junk?”

Terry: “As long as there’s a Starbucks nearby, we could live here.”

Mary (to David): “Now when you become my boss, you can tell me what to do.”

Rob: “Where are the baskets dude?” *slaps water*
Kimberly: “Don’t throw a hissy fit!”

David: “I ain’t never done nothin’ like this.”
Mary: “Oh look, you’re going straight to a mountain’”

Mary: “We came from Kentucky. We’ve never been put out in the real live ocean. Water over your head… if you fell, you’re dead!”

Rob: “I know how to row!”
Kimberly: “Yeah, I forgot you went to school for that.”

Clue: “Take your junk to the next pit stop.”

Tyler: “This guy forgot the anchor. Unbelievabe. Thanks guys!”
James: “No wonder we were going so slow.”
Tyler: “Great job man!”
Junk captain: *thumbs up*

Mary: “That’s Phil in the orange shirt… I know Phil! Scrawny little ol’ gorgeous thing!”

TAR 1 Frats elim:
Drew: "We have to get our stuff out of that cab."
Kevin: "He's all the way on the other side of China."

Hee! These two were providing the funny even after they were just eliminated. Definitely one of the classiest exits of any team to date.

From one of the TAR3 insider videos...

Derek & Drew: "We've been spending a lot of time with Flo and Zach, but they seem to be getting along very well. Yeah, we've never really seen the dark side of Flo yet...He hasn't suffered any at all. She's been very well-behaved. It seems like a big rumor. Gossip."

The whole interview cuts between clips of Flo yelling, and it's absolutely hilarious.

Tyler's "Then say something smart" this week.

Hee. I love how they always have to answer "What concerns you the most about the race?" Kim has a point.

Your post is like a year old, cabus but it made me giggle a lot. Thanks for the quotes.

I have to second this one because it is true. When do Lyn and Karlyn say something smart.

I still love this thread. Maybe I'll update soon with a couple of quotes from the most recent seasons. :)

I loved when Mary & Peach were in South Africa and they asked the woman on the train for directions to Langa and she told them, "If you go there they will kill you!" This one cracks me up every time.

There's always the Danny and Oswal shopping trip in Hong Kong, "We're shopping, We're shopping!" and after the cologne, "We're tired of being smelly." Hee! These two crack me up:)

Does anyone have Karlyn's exact line when she comments on Rob and Kim's car troubles and says something like, "When you keep having car trouble, eventually you have to think it may be you"? I know I butchered it badly, but I don't have it on tape to check.

From TAR FE

Michelle Godlewski: I'm sure I saw the sign.
Sharon: Oh God.
Michelle: What do you MEAN "Oh God"?!

Ian (of TAR 3 and All Stars):

"Hump it, Teri!"
"Now's the Time!"
"We're coming, Phil!"
"This is more important than your pants falling down!"
"Hoo-Rah!" and "Hoo-Rah for Teri!"
"Security please!"