What would I be? I'd be the heckler.

What would I heckle? Everything.

Kern:
-You call that a fucking TV show?
-Change the crack dealer, this one isn't working for you!
-Whoa! I nearly believed this wasn't crap for a moment!
-You killed Chris! Now I kill you!

Alyssa:
-Quick hide behind that piece of celery. The good taste police will never find you!
-You know, I didn't know old and haggard were in this year!
-How do you look in the mirror when you get up in the morning? Hell, how do you look in the mirror at any time of day?

Holly:
-You're still on this show? Do you have no self respect?
-Nice hair, pity it couldn't be on Law and Order. You know, a show people actually watch.

Eilish:
-Yo, skank! Get some glasses!
-Yo, skank! Get some dress sense!
-Yo, skank! DIE!

Brian:
-Go to the gym!
-Not the chimpanzee face!
-Two words: Face. Lift.

Rose:
-You joined CHARMED? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

I would be? Some innocent that ends up dying because of PhoeMe and her problems. She'd pay attention to herself and I'd get killed. Bitch.

Since I am a Puerto Rican guy, I wouldn't want to be on the show because I'd end up having Phoeces's tongue down my throat.



I don't even know where it's been and that freaks me out.

If I were on Charmed I would like to be Contrivance because then I would get the most screen time, more than Phoebe even.

I'd be a premonition. The bitch needs more of them.

I am ambitious, I'd want to be the new half sister they find when Paige dies a firey painful death (yup, Patty screwed another man besides Sam and Victor...some evil warlock). I'd have fire power from my dad and the whole telekenesis thing going on. I'd kick ass and spend my time teaching Phoebe to talk like an adult.

Then I'd get hair care tips from Holly and spend my time offscreen force feeding Alyssa and explaining the concept of clothing that covers your navel to her.

I'd be a depressed man on a bridge that Phoebitch runs into and tries to slam right there. Trying to stay away from her STD-ridden cooter I'd commit suicide.

I'd be the costume designer and dress Alyssa Milano in a birka.

I would be Christy so I could start Bille on fire. Only I would do it more than once.

Hee.

I'd be a Dolt-hating Darklighter.

Oh, wait...

I'd probably be Prue because we both share a deep hatred for Freebie. That and we're both the oldest of 3 I guess.

I'd be Zombie Prue and just guess who I'd be coming back for.

I'd be the Hands of Discontent and would cause Piper to vanquish everything that's wrong with the show, starting, I think, with Phoebe and Paige's wardrobes. And then on to the crackmonkeys...

I would be the casting director so I could find small children who look pleasant and loving, and who would stop killing my production assistants.

Yeah, I´d also be Prue. I´d come back with a vengance and kill slutty Phoebe.

I'd be a continuity editor...if they had one.

Ha!

You'd be the next Milk Carton. :)

I would be The Seer, and I would pee in Freebie's tonic!

I'd be baby Chris. That way I wouldn't have to be seen on this crappy show.

I'd be Chris, because lately I have been feeling like the neglected younger brother.

I would be Grams. Because she actually has a life.

I would be Phoebe's true love.

Because then I could never be found on the show.
Or maybe Grams - I'd rather drop dead before you can drag me into Charmed.

I would be Pheobe's boss' desk. I would see the most action of anyone! With Pheobe! Yea me!

I'd be the grandfather clock, at least then my time would come to a swift end...so to speak.

Again, I'd be Prue but now because she didn't have to live through the pain that was; 1) Chris' birth 2)Phoebe's Man-hair cut 3) Jason 4) Billie/Chrisssty 5)Season 8

I would be Jason Dean, because my hair is usually a mess and because I could only get through being on the show by smoking massive amounts of weed. The bad news is that I would be involved with Phoebe; the good news is that I would be able to use my millions and millions of dollars to stay far, far away from her.

I'd like to think I'd be Zankou, all cool and vaguely amusing and malevolant, but I'd probably be one of the annoying skank demons that dies in 5 seconds flat.

I'd be the downstairs bathroom, beacuse then i wouldn't have to make an appearance after season 2.