I just think it means we have excellent taste in television. Looking at your profile for your favorite shows (because that's what I do), we also like Degrassi. I don't post in that thread, so you wouldn't know that, but add me to that one, too. We are truly awesome.

The only reason I'll give Michelle a pass for being upset about Jesse is that Jesse was always kind of a douche in the sense that he did anything and everything for her. And then he just stopped. I can see that being irritating. Of course, Michelle goes about it the wrong way and gets big "aw"s from everyone, and it totally undercuts the sympathy, but ya know...she sucks.

I started to hate Michelle once she got lines. And the Olsen twins simply could not act. Michelle annoyed me in the episode where DJ comes back from Spain and her and Stephanie sneak on an airplane. She knew they were gonna be in a lot of trouble and just didn't care. The only time Michelle was tolerable was when she was with Jessie.

Has anybody seen the videotape of Bob Saget doing his comedy routine where he sings a song called "Danny Tanner was Not Gay" to the tune of the Backstreet Boys' "I Want It That Way"? It is hilarious!

Yep, it's brilliant. Absolutely brilliant. Saget rules.

And then today, on an episode of Just for Laughs (for non-Canadians, it's basically highlights from the Montreal Comedy Festival), after I was laughing at someone else, who comes on..

But Dave Coulier.

And I couldn't find my remote. Curses.

Boy, looking at him, Alanis Morisette really traded up, didn't she? I wouldn't go down on -him- in a theatre.

I've heard the 'Danny Tanner was not gay' song. Hysterically funny.

Michelle takes her camp pet rabbit home without permission and everyone is forced to drive all the way back to the camp to set him free because of her, and she gets nary a dirty look.

They should have dropped off Michelle at the camp and kept the rabbit.

Here, here!

WORD. Everytime she comes on my screen, I seriously want to slap her. Or the rest of the family for putting up with her.

They aired the episode today about Stephanie's classmate Charles who gets beaten by his dad. It was surpisingly tolerable, mainly because Jesse and Stephanie were the main characters and they could act. The Michelle B-plot was suitably horrendous.

I thought it was funny, though, that when Jesse went in a fit of anger to call child welfare after Stephanie told him what was going on, he didm't even have to look up the number. Just started dialing away. He probably practiced it a thousand times before, getting up the pluck to ask the authorities to do something about Michelle.

So Jodie Sweetin is going to host "the strip-tastic new show on Fuse, 'Pants-Off Dance-Off,' which features people of all ages taking off their clothes to their favorite music videos." I guess it's good to see that she has the crystal meth phase behind her, but...it's certainly an interesting career move.

Hmm, that is interesting.

Today at noon were two of the all-time worst Michelle episodes: the museum and Jesse's graduation.

First of all, you've got Michelle ruining a dinosaur, and then Jesse taking the blame. He shouldn't have let the kids run wild. Fine. But Michelle didn't fucking have to BREAK THE DINOSAUR. She was old enough to know what was appropriate. And she's such a bitch for treating Danny the way she does without a hint of regret.

The graduation episode isn't that bad, but Michelle's on one of her kicks. And she makes them take the subway because it's better for the environment, despite the fact they aren't driving across country or something. It, of course, screws Jesse all up, and it leads to some perfectly horrible moments of lecturing. Not terrible overall, but it should have been a bigger night for Jesse.

You know the "It's All Jim's Fault!" game in the 90210 thread? We need to do a "It's All Michelle's Fault!" thing for this one, 'cause seriously? We will never run out of material.

Oh, I know. Let's play for a few days.

For those who don't know, essentially, you come up with an absurd situation, and then someone tries to trace it back to how it's Michelle's fault. Because it likely is.

How is Jesse making the poor Japanese guy get him three different types of nuts all Michelle's fault?

I got nothin', sorry.

But I do have a creepy Joey moment from the DVDs (season 2) I'd like to share. Joey and Danny are discussing how Michelle is getting so big and growing up so fast. Joey looks at Danny and says, "You know, we really oughta think about having another one."

Meant to be funny, but when it's Joey? It creeps me out.

That's the funniest thing I've read all day. I'm still laughing five minutes after reading it.

Full House Career Pyramid
The Andrea Barber blurb cracked me up. And I love how they included the Rippers.

Michelle learned (via her transcontinental phone calls in an earlier episode) how the Japanese (along with the European continent and Canada) imports 78% of the peanuts from the US. Since we all know she loves America (witness the class production of "America the Beautiful"), she obviously wanted to keep these nuts in good, American bellies. The other two varieties mask her xenophobic plot. Before Jesse left for Japan, she probably did something "cute" (easy to fanwink), like leave notes in his luggage and pockets reading "You're NUTs for leaving us". Michelle Tanner: Nationalistic Pavlovian genius.

How are Kimmy's smelly feet all Michelle's fault?

Even though Kimmy seems to spend most of her time with the Tanners, one always needs to be ready to run away from Michelle. Therefore, Kimmy needs to keep on her shoes at all times, so she's prepared to escape from Michelle's clutches. She can only air out her feet when she is away from Michelle's evil presence, a la when she airs out her socks in the car, causing DJ to get a ticket.

(Weak, I know, but it's the middle of the night and I'm tired.)

How is Steve kicking the handle on the cement truck, causing cement to pour into the kitchen window, Michelle's fault?

What was Jodie Sweetin thinking hosting FUSE's Pants Off Dance Off? Is she that desperate to get back on television that she had to stoop to this level? Its bad enough that I hate that show. It just gets even sadder for Stephanie Tanner.

I could careless about Uncle Jesse's twins. They're just as dumb as Michelle and they also got on my nerves.

Does anybody else squirm at the sight of Joey's butt being sprayed with whipped cream?

It was D.J.'s foot, but ... Michelle and her stupid hobby caused her and Stephanie to start fighting, which distracted Danny and slowed him up as he tried to chase after D.J. and Steve. If it weren't for Michelle and her damn leaves, Danny would have stopped D.J. and Steve before they even got to the backyard, and they never would have gotten into the truck in the first place. Once again Michelle and her Me!Me!Me!ness ruins the day.

Way back in season one, how is Jesse accidentally sinking Danny's car Bullitt into the San Francisco Bay All!Michelle's!Fault!?

Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen are two decades old. Holy crap. Happy Birthday guys!

Ah, yes! Many, many pages back I posted how this was the single most horrifying sequence in F.H. history for me. I still stand by that today. The whole thing with the camera focused on his Smores-covered ass, then panning over to that creepy, pained expression on his face makes me want to throw up. Or bleach my brain in hopes of erasing that visual.

I agreed with you way back then, and I am equally nauseated thinking about it now...and remember the damn dog chased him around trying to lick the s'mores off? GAH! Need to go vomit now.

Couple of great moments lately...

Nicky and Alex tear Michelle's project apart. Despite the fact they were assholes for doing it and Becky and Jesse are assholes for learning parenting from Danny Tanner, it was great to see Michelle upset. And then one of the twins throws a ball at the other and hits him in the head! Great moment. GREAT.

Michelle tries to boss the twins around and people actually CALL HER ON HER SHIT. Granted, it's resolved immediately, but who cares? She didn't just dance away. Awesome.

Of course, not so great moments include Michelle being a bitch at Vicky's dinner. But that's okay. Kimmy's, "If you called us down here to tell us that sweater's out of style, we've known for three years," line in that episode makes up for all the bad.

Though those bizarre-o twins definitely are months behind the curve on being taught discipline, that whole thing was largely Michelle's fault. But she's Michelle, so she never gets blamed for anything. But if this happened to D.J. or Stephanie, you just know that Danny would have said something along the lines of, "I'm sorry, honey, but you know you shouldn't have left your project lying on the floor with your bedroom door open. After all, we do have two toddlers, not to mention a DOG, living in this house." I mean, duh. Her fault for leaving it there.



That's my favorite part of that whole episode.

What I personally have liked...okay, like is not the word. What I have personally found disgusting in recent episodes is one that was on today (where dumbass Michelle climbs up the fence and gets stuck). The bwuddahs are sitting on Jesse's lap at one point, and so help me, I swear one of them was just sitting there digging for gold. Fine editing there, FH staff. Oh, and Danny? What the hell is up with letting Michelle pick out the cardboard cutout of creepy, child-molesting-looking Syd at the electronics store?!

I hate everyone in that whole debacle. When Michelle wipes off the pesto sauce and Joey goes, "Michelle, you're missing the best part" and then she hands him the napkin. First off, that's a really mean, finger-pointy thing to say, especially to a child no matter what the behavior. Secondly, I'd find it less disgusting if someone wiped their ass and handed me the napkin than handing me the sauce they just wiped off the noodle. Something about that makes my stomach turn. Thirdly, Vicky had to have a clot on the brain to automatically assume kids Stephanie and Michelle's ages would like goat cheese pizza and pesto sauce for their first (or any) dinner together. Fourth and finally, Danny sucks for not realizing the food would go over like a fart in church and not saying a damn thing to Vicky about it, essentially selling her out and leaving her there to swing in the wind. No wonder she'd rather have a fruitful career in broadcasting rather than move in and play June Cleaver to a cadre of retarded ferrets.



That makes my head want to explode. He's letting them have any electronic thing they want and Michelle takes the cut-out because it has the damn bird on it. What is that? That's one of the times you should just step in, overrule the kid, get something the whole family can enjoy, and send the brat to her room if she can't deal with it. But then again... it's Michelle so of course not.

You know, Joey with the whipped creamed ass bothers me because I get the sense it wasn't the first time that it had happened in that house.

At least he had pants on.

That made me laugh, cry, -and- want to bleach my eyes at the visual.

The trifecta!

This time...

And .... nightmares.

Sorry if this has already been discussed many times before (I tried a search, but nothing came up), but what's up with that house? How the hell do Jesse and Becky live in the attic? On the opening shot of the house (I've found a picture before, but I can't seem to find it now), there is no attic.

And that's the only thing that bothers you about this show?

What bothers me is why the hell they would WANT to live in an attic. I mean, before she married Jesse, Becky had a nicely furnished apartment of her own- why in the world would she willingly agree to permanently move into (and raise her children in) her husband's brother-in-law's attic with her coworker, some random guy, and the coworker's three kids? Especially when one of those kids was Michelle? It's mentioned in the episode where Stephanie drives the car through the wall that her apartment wasn't far from Danny, so it isn't like the alternative to living with the family was moving out of the country never to see or speak to them again. (Although in the case of Joey and Michelle, that doesn't sound like a bad idea.)

Another thing that bothers me is how after she moved in with family, Becky never seemed to go to any of the social events she liked to go to before meeting Jesse (remember that charity dinner thing they went to where Jesse made an ass of himself?) It's mentioned in that episode that she went to those sort of events often, but she stopped soon after marrying Jesse. Another thing that bugs me, and I don't know if anyone else noticed, is how Becky usually wore quite expensive-looking, well put together outfits before marrying Jesse, but after that she gave them up for those awful drapey maternity dresses she constantly wore.

Because one of those kids is Michelle. And her word is law! Ye shall bow down and obey thy majesty's desires.

But seriously, that is the stupidest thing ever. She has, from the couple of times we see it, a very nice apartment/townhouse/whatever it is. I mean, it looked really nice, and a great place for a new bride and groom to start out. And she gives it up to live in her brother-in-law's attic, because her 4-year-old niece feels unhappy about a change in her life? What ... ever.

In the end, I think the ultimate moral of "Full House" is that Michelle always has to get her way...no matter what.

Nah, I just bet that Becky was secretly getting it on with Joey. Imagine, he probably does his "cut.it.out" routine in bed.

Forgive my sick imagination, it's late and I'm tired.

Italy just accidentally scored a goal for the United States in the World Cup, and I automatically yelled, "Wrong way Tanner!"

Ha! I did the exact same thing.

I hope that poor guy's sister made a video of all his moronic relatives and the pedophile that lives in the house doing stupid things.

ITA that Joey was a pedophile, but I also got weird "I molest my children" vibes from Danny too. I think part of the reason Joey seems like such a pedophile is that he never, ever had a serious, adult relationship with a woman. The only times we saw him dating women, all that happened was he made the same stupid jokes he made with he girls, and the woman laughed. I have no idea why- I was really young when I started watching the show, and I don't remember ever finding him funny, so it's preposterous to think that a grown woman (actually more than one of them) would appreciate his humor.

Hee. I told my mom about Jodie Sweetin's soon-to-be TV comeback as host of Pants Off Dance Off (good God, I cannot get my mind around that inane title). Mother Dear skips past the stupid show name, the stupid concept, the stupid channel that she's never even heard of, and offers this as her only response: "She's alive?"

Jessie and Beckie living in the attic was obvious creative laziness by the writers in order to keep the concept of "Full House" mantained. A far greater idea would be to have something horrible befall Beckie's apartment, like a fire or being swallowed up by an earthquake. Then Jessie and Beckie could have been forced to move back in with the Tanners... and not being happy about it. A running plot would then be them trying to move out and comically failing for various reasons.

But no. They had to be one big happy family under the iron fist of Meeee-shell and then automatically have twins of their own. Stupid show! Stop shoveling your crap into my eyeballs!

I just had a friend call me last night and said she watched a Full House episode and cried. I asked her which one she saw, and she said it was the one where the Greek grandfather died. Of course I was speechless b/c I didn't know what to say or how exactly to work in the it's all Michelle's fault angle. Can I get some help here, I know you guys are experts at the "blame Michelle Tanner game."

Easy! What was Papouli doing the night before he passed on? Dancing up a storm. And why was he dancing? Because Michelle made him, made him teach her the Greek dance. See, Michelle made him overexert himself, and he keeled over in his sleep. Murderer!

That's basically it. If Michelle had just taken in a rock or something to show and tell, like every other boring kid in school does, then Papouli wouldn't have died. Old men shouldn't dance like that.

Today, I saw some of Michelle in the car race. Hate that episode, mostly. Michelle is such a bitch, first trying to make Becky do the work then acting incredibly ungrateful when Becky tries.

Danny's insane ballet moves to make fun of Joey saves the show, though.

It would take hours of seeing Danny's insane ballet moves to fix the brain damage I suffered from having to see Dave Coulier's junk in those tights.

When is Jodie set to debut on that Fuse show? I don't want to miss it.

Good grief. "A House Divided" is on now on ABC Family. Yes, stinking rich tycoon offers to buy the house for twice what it's worth and they decide to turn it down and continue to live like sardines, why? Because Queen Michelle said so, as usual.