Ugh. This brings back my rage of the shtick Michelle just stole from Steph. You know the whole sad-voice "Yes you arrrrrre!" routine. I used to love it when Stephanie did it, but when Michelle started doing it, she just had this "duh" face instead of a "sad" one. And it wasn't cute at all. It was annoying. I know she was younger when she started doing it, but they should have given her another routine in the first place! Of her own!! (end rant)

The expression "have mercy", especially when used after a chaste kiss, made me terribly embarrassed for John Stamos when I first started watching this show -- and I was, like, eight. So at the same point I thought Tomagotchis were kickass, I was mortified by the writing on Full House. That's a sad statement right there.

Another "hilarious catchphrase": every time Joey and Jesse had a little fight and Joey pissed Jesse off by rumpling his hair, you could pretty much count on a hearty "watch the hair!" coupled with a palms-out-grimace-on-the-face motion from Jesse.

I also hated the "Danny is so CLEAN! He cleans his CLEANING PRODUCTS! Geddit? Geddit?!" jokes.

Thank you! I think I've seen him somewhere else recently too, and now I can place him.

Also, way late to the misheard lyrics conversation, but I always thought "A light is waiting to carry you home" was "And Daddy is waiting to carry you home," which makes a hell of a lot more sense. You guys have enlightened me.

...

I remember reading this in the Star after the first season. And yes, I did read the Star when I was 8. And no I don’t know why this article made such an impression on me. I think it’s because my Full House loving 8-year-old mind couldn’t handle the fact that Stephanie would be recast as the article alluded too.



You must be living in my head because I always thought that too.

I had a pretty good idea of all of the lyrics in the theme song, so I can't contribute to that discussion. However, there was one catchphrase that I misheard my entire life (I started watching Full House around age 4 or 5 and I'm the same age as MKA) and did not realize until a couple of years ago. For some reason, I always thought Uncle Jesse said "Aunt (pronounced 'ant') mercy!" I never understood why. Would I be right in assuming that "Have mercy!" is some sort of Elvis throwback, or was that the best the writers could do for Jesse aside from "Watch the hair!" ?

I will never take another 3 week hiatus from TWoP again! I just ended up reading the new posts in this thread, and the laughter that ensued from the misunderstood lyrics almost killed me!

I had a pretty good handle on the theme song too, but when I was younger, "predictability" was something like "a-dip-da-dee-dee-dee", since I had no idea what predictability was at the time, lol. But that singer could not enunciate for the life of him, so it was excused ;)

I'm watching the episode (on ABC Fam) where the guys wonder what the future would be like if they all stayed the way they are...with the guys taking care of the ungrateful girls. At one point, "Adult Kimmy" walks in and she's quite the looker (by 80's standards) and makes a comment like "you guys shoulda been more nice to me when I was a kid" while the guys are all holding their chests and hooting about how hot she is.

Is it just me, or is there something seriously sick and twisted about that? Gah.

It's just as sick and twisted as when Greg Brady has a hit with Jesse's old Rippers and Jesse falls asleep dreaming that his music career is over and he is married to Kimmy (who, for some reason, looks just like Peg Bundy).

o/t: Well, in Alaska they are.

Big fat word. She's young enough to be their daughter, for God's sake! It's like Bob Saget hooking up with one of the Olsen twins (ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew).

The episode when Stephanie crashed the car really pissed me off. For starters, how blase was Jesse about the whole thing? When he walks into Becky's house, it's an "Oh, that was you?" rather than "Oh my God!". The "Becky's going out with someone handsome" horse had the shit beaten out of it twice already; were the writers on some kind of "Third time's the charm" acid? And why does every. single. damn. "punishment talk" turn out to be some sort of "Oh, you're my daughter and I'll never stop loving you no matter what you do" crap? Aargh!

Am I mistaken, or was Joey singing freaking "Janie's Got A Gun" during Full House today? During a telethon for a children's charity, no less?

The fuck?
Did TPTB really have no idea what it was about? Or were they really just mocking their insipid show and amusing themselves? You decide.

I am totally cracking up that "My Perrogative" is playing at DJ's birthday party. So wrong, yet so, so right.

That episode where the family babysits someone's baby and he screams unless Jesse is near him episode ran today. Michelle's reaction was kind of extreme, but it also wasn't totally unrealistic. What pissed me off was Danny's smug "So when (talking to her like an actual person and not just a short moron) didn't work, then what did you do?", and smugly horrified "you tried to BRIBE her?!" when Jesse says he tried to reward her for being a big girl (bribery WORKS sometimes. Just sayin'.) like he's, you know, a semicompetent parent. HAAAAATE!

Speaking of the theme song... I know I may be way out in left-field here, but whenever I hear Janet Jackson's song "Together Again" I can't help but think how similiar it sounds to the FH theme. Of course it's not the whole song, it's just when the chorus goes "Everywhere I go, every smile I see, I know you are there smiling back at me" and it is at this point where I subconsciously start to sing "...a hand to hold onto..."

Speaking of DJ's birthday, I think it was totally wrong that they had DJ apologize at the end. The guys did ruin her party, and they did humiliate her in front of her friends! I don't understand why they were freaking out just because the kids wanted to play spin the bottle- it's just harmless fun & normal for kids their age. The only bright spot of this ep is it's one of the only times we get to see Kathy Santoni live on camera. I think this is the only season that they show her at all.

No, Kathy Santoni showed up when they started middle school "Kathy, you've grown up!"..."And out!" (oh my god I remember that shoot me now). Kathy was definitely around now and again. Usually as a way for the girls to feel inferior.

Rock on Kathy Santoni, rock on.

Oh and it pissed me off that they made her get pregnant. It smacks of 7th Heaven "girls with big boobs who like boys and their bodies will become sex-crazed maniacs who will get pregnant and ruin their lives" talk. Stupid Full House. Maybe Kathy could've gone to college, enjoyed sex and being sexual and then become a CEO of a major corporation.

Wow.. who knew I had such strong feelings about this?

Good point re: Kathy Santoni's teenage pregnancy. She was always a foil for DJ and her Steve-and-I-would-never-even-consider-sex-EVER attitude.

Heh I love the DJ birthday ep, especially when Gibbler & Bitterman have to kiss.

Kathy Santoni didn't commit the sin of unwed teen pregnancy, remember. She DID get married, so she was just that crazy married high school pregnant girl. Which made it totally reasonable for Danny to get all freaked out and suspect that DJ and Steve were totally doing the horizontal mambo, even though Steve could barely stop eating and wrestling to suck face with DJ on the couch. And going to Steves apartment was obviously the best way to deal with things. Stupid sexy Kathy Santoni. It's all her fault.

Dude... Steve was the most sexless boyfriend that ever existed on any tv show ever. The only time he was ever interesting was the apartment episode and when DJ got jealous over Steve's blonde exgfriend and they boy nearly went up to the hotel room at the dance and Becky stopped them. Stupid Becky! Something INTERESTING might have happened. Geez!

Honestly, how about we have some truth here... sometimes nice boys want to go too fast because of hormones.. maybe Full House could've done something about that? Oh wait, they had to have more plotlines with Michelle. My mistake.

I know, that was just... eeew. Teen sex is taboo, but pervy old men aren't. Whatever, Full House.
My favorite part of the Danny spys on DJ at Steve's apartment episode was when Danny breaks the chair in Steve's hallway, the landlord makes him pay for it. Take that, Captain Nosypants.

So, I spend part of my Saturday night watching Full House, and they decide the assault me with the episode that has Joey and Danny dress up like women to steal their fraternity mascot. And the sorority ladies press charges because they attempt to steal a stuffed seal. How unrealistic is that? And the badass prison guys? Totally love Wake Up San Francisco. Good times.

What about the guy who hits on Danny and then says "you tease!"? Yes, that would really happen in real life. I always found it amusing how none of the sorority women had seen "Wake Up San Fransisco." Stupid Danny Tanny the Tranny.

That's the name of my next album. :)

Yeah, the former sority member who became a cop arresting them. The next line out of either Joey or Danny would of been: "And what was it you did all those years ago? Borrowing?" Sority Cop: "Umm... umm... I'm charging you with cross dressing."

What was the thing that Danny & Joey were trying to steal from the sorority? Wasn't it a stuffed animal of some sort- like a seal or walrus or some other marine mammal?

I think there is some clause that every sitcom HAS to have an episode were male characters have to dress up like women in order to accomplish some meaningless task.

That? Made me laugh for, like, an hour.

People, never ever go looking for "adult" Full House fanfic. I know it's been said, many times, many ways, but it's not even funny, it's just upsetting. Please, please learn from my mistake.

The dream sequence in that one ep with Gibbler and her bodacious ta-tas is upsetting, and Jesse dreaming about marrying Gibbler...EW. I mean, there weren't enough pedophilic undertones on this show?

Now, of course, I have to do a google search. Thanks, McKay.

Yeah, I'm masochistic. Now I'm totally going to go look for x-rated fanfic... tomorrow. Right now it's too late.

Don't do it! I accidentally came across some Olsen twins with Lori Loughlin, Candace Cameron, and Jodie Sweetin one time and it scarred me for life!

I found a couple of Joey/Jesse slash fics. I had to scrub my brain after reading.

Wow, you people are finding fics even I haven't come across yet. I'm impressed.
Also, ew.

Color me shocked. Who would have thought that there is a Full House slash genre? And, moreover, that some people genuinely enjoy it?

Moving on to a topic that doesn't make me want to gouge my eyes out: I saw the telethon episode (in which Joey inappropriately sings "Janie's Got a Gun") for the first time about a week ago, and sweet Jebus. What a godawful episode -- one made even worse by the Beach Boys' seemingly obligatory whorefest at the end. (Honestly, how many times have they appeared on the show apropos of nothing?)

Anyway, what exactly was the purpose of that episode? I realize that Full House is formulaic by its very nature, and that some shocking plot twist isn't to be expected during the Heartfelt Speech, but that was one of the most pointless plotlines I've ever seen on the show.

I think there's a slash following for everything ever. Still, ew.

I don't remember that episode, and I'm glad that I don't. Beach Boys eps were bad enough (didn't they also guest on Home Improvement?) but Joey? Singing? "Janie's Got a Gun"? The hell?

Is it just my imagination, or did the Beach Boys appear multiple times on the show? It seems like ever other episode of Full House featured A) the Beach Boys or B) an animal (chimp, elephant, pot-bellied pig, donkey, etc).

The love letter episode was on today and boy, was it an exercise in stupidity. I could maybe understand the tweens getting pulled into this trap but how in the hell did the adults fall for that crap? I know, I know, Full House. over thinking it.

However Michelle did manage to earn some points with this classic line,
"Boring. Boring. Why is my daddy so boring?"

Yep, truer words were never spoken by Michelle.

Today I got to see the episode where Joey and Jesse are off in the woods for a romantic camping trip or something (I missed the part where they explained why, so I came up with my own story). Anyway, it's got the wacky hijinks of Danny trying to run the house by himself, and he says he's going to Stephanie's science fair and DJ's play. First off, how does she do a play in only a matter of days? We first hear about this play in that episode and it's performed within the episode too? So, anyway, Danny's compromise is that he'll go to the science fair first, then to DJ's play, but both girls bitch cause DJ's in the first act of the play and Stephanie wants him to be there for the judging. So why doesn't Danny just say "ok, I'll go to the play, then leave at intermission for the science fair"? Because that'd be too obvious?

This is also the episode where Michelle licked the cream out of all of the Oreos, then put the cookies back in the jar. She's just so cute.

That has ALWAYS bothered me- how Danny could solve the problem so *simply* and yet does it the way so no one is happy. It's absolutely mind-boggling. In my head I have to make up some little reason as to why Danny couldn't have gone to DJ's play 1st & Steph's science fair 2nd, b/c it's just so painfully annoying to see the solution & Danny doesn't!

EW. I'd blocked that out until just now. How could anyone find that cute or amusing? It's revolting! If I ever caught my kid (if I had any) doing that, they wouldn't be having cookies for a very, very long time.
What dumbass leaves a cookie jar where a houseful of small kids can get at it, though?

My favorite Michelle moment ever was when she was punished in her room, and she kept sliding her paw under the door and wailing. It was probably the first real punishment this show has ever showed.

JJ and D finally make her promise to be a "good giww" and then she comes running out of the room saying "let's pawwty dude!" with the Arsenio arm wooping thing. Simply a classic moment. It showed crappy parenting at it's finest.

Being sent to a room that's like a Toys R Us is hardly punishment, especially when it lasts for all of four seconds. I assume she wasn't confined to a time-out chair if she was reaching under the door.

I know what you're saying, it's just...what passes for ideal parenting on this show is mind-blowing.

Steve Ukrel on FH alert: Sunday night at 9:30. It's been way too long since I saw that one.

Does it irritate anyone else that Joey would always have his shirts buttoned up to the very top button, while Jesse always had half of his shirt buttons unbuttoned? For some reason, the smallest things on the show really irritate me. Anyone? No? Just me? Moving along...

Anyone know who wrote the jokes for Joey? Did they come from the writers, or was it acutally Dave Cool-yay's work?

They're showing the episode where Joey opens for Wayne Newton in Vegas. It kind of looked like some of the people in the "audience" (if it was a true audience, not a staged one) were really laughing at his jokes.

I sincerely hope that at least some of it was Dave's work, because that lameass "Cut.It.Out." bit is still in use. And the impressions are his, right? Although, him stealing his routines from the show would be laughably sad.

I have a feeling that the woodchuck's "is it made of....wood? nyuk nyuk nyuk!" is all Cool-yay.

I was watching the Las Vegas episode today, too. That red suit that Jessie was wearing was a crime against humanity. It gave me a headache. It's almost as godawful as that teal suit he was wearing in the episode where his grandparents and greek 'wife' came to visit. All I can say is, thank God the 80's (early 90's) are over.

If it means anything, I like yours better.

Our prayers have been answered.