...when you're watching the Capitol One Bowl (WTF? What kind of fugaboo bowl is that?) and the commentator announces that one of the UGA players had his helmet in the Neutral Zone and immediately, you think of a wing of Romulan Warbirds decloaking and firing a few rounds of plasma torpedoes at the Enterprise.

Cause that would really make the game interesting.

Yes, I have an overactive imagination. Why do you ask?

I thought about the Romulan Neutral Zone then, too!

(I think that bowl is what used to be the Citrus Bowl.)

...when you're halfway home on the PA turnpike (the most evil, boring road in the history of roads) and you find yourself following a truck labelled "Scotty's Security" and thinking that's just wrong.

Also, you know...when instead of going to a party, you spend a fabulous New Year's Eve watching your recently-acquired DS9 season 6 DVDs (we got season 7, too).

You know....when makes you insanely jealous. The Firefly set I got for Christmas can't even come close to making up for all 7 seasons of DS9!

I really wish that had been my New Year's. I went to a friend's house and she let the non-scifi person pick the entertainment so we ended up watching the Wedding Singer. There will be a DS9 marathon tonight.

I followed an SUV home for Christmas whose license plate said DSDP (or something similar). It kept catching my eye so I was continually disappointed with its non-trekiness.

The Vedek's dad gave us an extremely generous $200 for Christmas, so that's what we "invested" in.

...when you're reading your CNN morning news email, and start giggling because the name of their space/NASA correspondent is Miles O'Brien.

I remember someone mentioning that at the time of the Columbia disaster. At least he's got better news this time.

Goldfish, I did the same thing! Only for some dumb reason, I thought, "Wow. They got him to do a news gig for CNN?" Then I realized the actor's name is Colm Meaney.

...when you have a dream about a lost TOS episode that you watch and, because it's so dramatic, you cry. Then you blubber that this is the first TOS ep. that made you cry.

A church I pass on the way to work has the following sign out front:



Unfortunately, I don't think it's our kind of Trekker.

I was describing how quickly diseases spread through the band's populace, one person gets sick and everyone does, and drew the analogy of "well, its like the with the borg collective..."

Also, we spent half an hour discussing time travel in English and I was the one bringing up various trek paradoxes and enjoying it much.

Must have been a quick mention of each of them. There's been a lot, you couldn't have gotten through them all in a half hour.

...You change a character's name to Jim, just so you can have someone tell him "She's dead, Jim." I suspect I'm not the only one who does that kind of thing, either.

You know...when instead of just saying, "He has a hollow leg" after your 3-year-old eats half his weight in Mexican food, your Trekkie husband says, "He must have a subspace pocket in his gut."

...when you see someone playing for the Colts named "Bashir," and you think "Aha! Their secondary is genetically enhanced!"

...when as part of your massage the masseuse massages your ears and you think "If I were a Ferengi, I'd be having an orgasm right now!"

Hee! That would be quite the massage!

...when you finally get a library card, and four of the first six books you check out are DS9 selections.

(btw, The Left Hand of Destiny is really good- especially part 2)

...when your friend announces his wedding date and that it'll be The Captain's Wedding at the Vegas Hilton. And instead of being thrilled for him, you're jealous that such things didn't exist when you got married.

When is your friend's wedding, belsum? The Borg exhibit opens in March...

October, so I'll totally get to check it out. Thanks for the tip lis!

You know...when you're reading about quinoa in a recent entry from keckler's Grub Report, and get bothered by this quote...

...because the actual supergrain of the future is quadrotriticale.

"Wheat? So what?"

Aw, you know you're sweet when you quote from The Grub Report!

starri, I'm sorry for having phasers set to "Trekkie," but I think it's "Wheat. So what?"

...when you know quadrotriticale is not wheat.

And that it's a Russian inwension.

...when you're looking over this new health cereal that your parents are hooked on and can't stop laughing because it contains triticale. And you have to explain the whole thing to your mother.

Seriously, Trek does a lot of that- take real things and add prefixes, or switch letters. Quadrotriticale, Dilithium, Duranium, Tritanium, etc.

You know your husband has phasers set to "Trekkie" when you complain to him that beyond a certain speed, your car shakes like it's going to fall apart, and his response is to clench his fist and shout, "Fly her apart then!"

Hee!

You know...when you read this headline and think, "They need Captain Janeway. She dealt with those all the time."

thinga, that's funny!

You know...when, as you're backing your car out of it's parking space, you think that "Enterprise Clears Moorings" (from WOK) should be playing. Cause that would be cool.

You know...when you catch the last ten minutes of What's new in Vegas 2004 and squeal when they discuss the Borg attraction. And then you record it next time it comes on so you can see it again.

Your husband knows you have phasers set to trekkie when you are watching American Idol and when you wonder aloud if the Klingon contestants sang opera, he comments, "Only if we're really lucky." And then he laughs and laughs and laughs.

You know...when you refer to your new USB Key as an isolinear chip.

You know...when you see Patrick Stewart in a stage version of The Tempest and wonder why (the entire play) he doesn't just beam himself out of there.

I know because it happened to me.

Also know when your favorite line ever delivered from Captain Pickard is not from TNG but from Dune: Moods are for cattle and loveplay!"

You know...when you are overjoyed to find a coworker that likes Trek...and when you're absolutely gutted when he tells you that his favourite show was Voyager.

OMG, PrettyButterfly, that's happened to me too! There was that split second when a look of complete disgust took over my face and pretty much ruined any further conversation on the matter. Good times.

PrettyButterfly, me three! I usually respond with "How on God's polluted earth can you claim that Voyager was anything other than an abomination??" I think I should get the Nobel Peace Prize, no?

You know...when you realize you have Wrath of Khan on two formats and three versions (televised, VHS, DVD-SE). And when you get incensed when people misspell Khan and denounce them as not True Trekkies.

Make that a me four! Only mine was a personal betrayal. My husband told me last week (after watching "Proving Ground" with me) that Voyager was his favorite Trek and that Enterprise sucked. I filed for divorce this morning....

I've got to take issue with that, Captain. I've been known to spell it as "Kahn", and I dare you to question my trekkie credentials. Heh.

Poor spelling is not inconsistent with the trekkie way of life.

Oh, and enjoy single life, skye!

Just remember it as I do, lis: He's South Asian, not Jewish.

I've recently been considering disowning one of my aunts. I tried to get past the fact that she loved Voyager and loaned her my DS9 dvds so she could see the light. She enjoyed season 1 but has had season 2 since Easter (wow, I hadn't figured that out until now) and hasn't watched them.

You know...when your study group must pick a name, and you campaign for "the Collective" (we're voting tomorrow. I think I'm going to win!).

Reliant Stadium. Hee, Wrath of Kahn.

....when you get the list of paints for your art class, and giggle when you see that "Viridian Green " is one of the colors listed.

...when you see Janet Jackson's boobage, and the first thing you think is, "Borg implant!"

...when you spend the Alamo preview looking for Miles and Julian in a coonskin hat.

... When you buy seasons 5, 6 & 7 of DS9, then watch all 78 eps in two and a half weeks. Yes, I have a lot of free time.

...when the guy handing out religious tracts on the subway is going on about "the wrath of God," and for a moment you pay attention, because you think you heard him mention the "wrath of Khan."

...when you find yourself taking an interest in your mum's plant that she is slowly killing because she decided (all on her own) to name it Kira.

Kira cannot die.

Hee! Save Kira!

You know your professor is at least potentially a trekkie when he can't stop laughing when you introduce your presentation this way:



Oh, wait. Doing that is how I know I'm a trekkie.

...when you're in the mall at closing time, and one of the stores is lowering their door, and you have to fight the urge to do Geordi's patented roll under the closing door.

COOLLLANT LEAK! We have a COOLLLANT LEAK!

...when you see a cookie company called "Archer Farms" and wonder aloud if it's Captain Archer's retirement plan.