No excuse for the behavior then. Not one word should be said to her.

I agree that yelling and screaming is not acceptable (not to mention totally useless in trying to get what you want) but to me Rami and his wife's situation was more about intentions than anything else. I don't know what their lives are really like. Perhaps Rami works 80 hours a week. Perhaps the wife does as well with the kids and other stuff she does (I hate calling her "the wife" - for the life of me I can't remember her name). But it didn't seem to me like either person was trying to help out with these chores all that much.

I live with people who never seem to make an effort (to keep things tidy, to share, to help out). I found I could totally relate to Rami's position and when DP started into "it's not about socks" I was like, perhaps not, but it may just be about consideration and respect (instead of DP's theory [which nobody bought] about Rami holding the wife up to high expectations because of his mother - give me a break). I'm sure the people I live with often think I'm a control freak, always bugging them about picking up after themselves, but I honestly don't care about the mess. I really, really don't. I care about the fact that I have to wade through the mess to do what I want to do, and the fact that it doesn't bother them that they're inconveniencing me makes it all the more hurtful.

I definitely think Rami could have helped out more instead of yelling at his wife, especially considering she was pregnant. But it wouldn't surprise me to find out the wife was always a bit of a slob. Bottom line, I think both of them could have tried harder. Perhaps Rami would do the dishes a couple times, the wife would do it a couple times, but together, as a team, it would get done. Why DP didn't stress this, I have no idea.

I think Rami just has no idea how to communicate in a normal way. Even if at some point they both agreed that it was her job to take care of the dishes, he doesn't have to get all yelly about it. Busy people forget to do things because they get distracted. He could remind her in a normal, nice tone that the dishes need to be done. Like she said, she just tunes him out when he starts yelling at her. I doubt she would flat out refuse to clean if he'd calm down and talk to her like she was an equal and not his kid.

Thank you for the recap, percolata.

I think I've seen that episode before. Rami's wife had a blank look on her face most of the time, right? I couldn't put up with a guy like that. He should get a face full of Gain the next time he yells at his wife.

Re: Friday's adoption reunion show.

WTF? When did DP turn into Montel?

I guess my whole take on Rami is that there is NO excuse big enough to yell at your wife. Especially if she is pregnant! But, I see CG's point. I have been at home for the past 4 months preparing for Baby Borokat's birth and I pull my weight! But the great thing is- since Mr. B. sees me pulling my weight, he respects me and he pitches in sometimes, even if I tell him not to! I think the key to being a SAHM in this day and age is choice. If women feel like they have a choice to stay at home (not because its "woman's work" but because they want to) or work, then maybe people will stop looking at it as a copout, laziness, or a blow to feminism. Mr. B has often said that if I write a book and make boatloads of money, he will stay at home with rugrat!

If DP is right (and I sincerely doubt he is) and Rami is yelling at his doormat wife because he sees her as a second class citizen because his parents don't like her- then she should hit the road. I would not have married someone that shallow and chauvinistic in the 1st place!

My sister in law is a SAHM and has two kids- stepbrother is in the army. There are days (most) when he comes home and the house is a mess and everyone is still in their pjs. The kids are unkempt and plopped in front of teh TV and she has totally let herself go. He does not respect her and they are on the brink of divorce.

So I guess I see both sides.

I can't believe I used to actually like DP. I admired his no-nonsense approach when he was on Dope-rah (I actually even bought one of his books), but he's turned into a big, fat blowhard with nothing of any value to say. He's so damned full of himself and I can no longer watch him stroking his ego (and his family) and searching out trailer trash families to "help" by bullying them and stopping at nothing for the sake of ratings. If I wanted to see that, I would watch Jerry Springer. At least Jerry doesn't try to act like he's some kind of professional with supposed "credentials" to back up his obnoxious behavior. DP has become the antithesis of everything he once stood for. What a sellout. Yuck.

With all due respect, you cannot actually know that. I know people who have one partner stay home and his job is to care for their 6 children. The housework is done jointly by both of them, with help from the older kids. People have all kinds of different agreements in these situations, and I think we should all be careful about what assumptions we make about other people's lives.

So one of the questions I think that Dr. Phil could have asked, if he were actually interested in helping these people, would have been, "What is your agreement about how the housework is handled?" While Rami's behavior was out of line (totally and completely), his desire for her to do more housework may or may not have been reasonable, given whatever they may (or may not) have agreed on regarding these things.

Yeah, Dr. Phil really didn't ask the right questions about the housework. I mean, Rami was saying how his mom was the perfect housewife and stuff but did his mom work full-time like his wife does? Did Dr. Phil even point that out? Dude, I could do Dr. Phil's job better than him with my community college parking sticker stuck to my car's back window, sitting outside of my sad, rented house. This is depressing.

I just gotta say a great big word to SorchaRei on your comments about SAHM. I'm one myself, my husband works and earns the money while I stay home with my very active 3 year old son. The way I see it, my job never really ends. I'm pretty much on the go from the time my son wakes up until he goes to bed. After that, there's still the stuff I have to do that I can't take care of with a busy 3 year old clinging to me. My wonderful husband knows that because of this, his work isn't always done the minute he punches out at the office. Sometimes he makes dinner, sometimes he loads the dishwasher, sometimes he does the laundry. But that's just us, and that's the agreement we've come to. So to assume that any situation with a stay-at-home-parent should be just like the next is where you run into problems. I think that's where you get guys like Rami having expectations of their wife that might not be resonable or possible given their individual situation.

Another thing, I am not the neatest person in the world. My house is no pig stye but if you were to come to my house you might find a few things out of place. Mr timeonmyhands knew this about me before we got married. My guess is that Mrs Rami (whos name I don't remember) was never the worlds neatest person. Rami had to know this about her before they got married. To expect her to change after giving her a home, a husband and a child to take care of is just silly. He needed a great big slap of reality. You darned well better like (or at least accept) everything about your SO before marrying them. Making them your wife (or husband) doesn't mean they're going to become your ideal spouse and turn into, for example, your mother.

I think the salient point here is that Mrs. Messy isn't a SAHM. Working or not I have yet to meet the mother of a toddler with a consistently clean house. God only knows what Rami does around the house, if anything, other than yell. Thanks to Dr. Idiot we don't know what their arrangements were.



Heh! El DeMarge, I have no doubt you would've grilled 'em good! Your name cracks me up too, I always start humming 'rhythm of the night' when I see it ;-)

That's what I wanted to know too, what are their arraignments, have they even bothered to sort out the who-does-what? Seems a good therapist would have given them a workable plan, and asked them both to commit to it and to treat one another with respect.

Mrs Rami does not need Dr Phil; she needs Flylady!! I found this site right before Mr marillion and I got married, and it really saved us a lot of grief, housework-wise. Flylady's system involves acceptance of imperfection, regular decluttering, and daily and weekly routines that just promote a real flow and order to your life. I recommend this site to all of us having trouble finding a good system to keep our homes somewhat orderly. I say this as a former lazybones without a clue where to begin. Actually, I'm still a lazybones, but my home is decent, neat and uncluttered.

I apologize for going off topic , but I just really empathize with people feeling overwhelmed by their surroundings..


You are sooooooooooooooooooooooooo right, sad to say.......I used to quote him a lot, too....

El DeMarge, I love your name! Like PissyMissy, I start humming, but it's "Dancing in the Sheets"
Forgive me, "Dancing in the Sheets" is by Shalamar, not ElDeBarge-sorry! Still love your name...

Cool Fly Lady site!

When I was first married I found a library book that helped me figure out what had to be done, daily, weekly, monthly and in what order. It really helped me get organized and quit feeling like I was going around in circles and never getting finished. It's amazing that housework gets so little respect that there are probably more books on collecting stamps than on this thing that consumes so many hours of everyone's day and effects the quality of life for whole families.

1. Count me in as a Flybaby, for a few months now. My house is not all that clean, but her principles have taken us much farther towards liveable than what we had before. In fact, I think the Flylady would do a much better job at this show than DP.

2. I'm a work-at-home-mom. I have a full time (Plus!) job that I do from a home office, as does my husband, and a four-month-old. I also had my daycare fall through, so I have an office baby at least until May. You guys are so right, the agreement needs to be defined, and then redefined every time a new element is added, like niece moving in, baby coming, etc. Mr. Hex is outstanding, and he also knows that if he said something like "the laundry needs doing" I might answer, "good idea, I'll watch the baby while you do that!" We share the load.

3. I watched 10 minutes of the adoption show and just felt squicky. It was so Maury.

Me too. It has to be a real loser show if we aren't talking about it.
It's always the same thing. Grown kid looks and sounds hurt about being placed for adoption while protesting too much about how brave his bio mom must have been to do it. Bio mom looks racked with guilt and grief. Adoptive mom tries not to show how threatened and hurt she feels. Pain everywhere. If I adopted a baby today, I would be sorely tempted to move to another state and never tell a soul, including the child. Medical records, shmedical records.

percolata, I love you but I have to disagree about what you said about not telling the child if you adopted it. My husband and I adopted Jr timeonmyhands and even though he's only 3 we have still talked to him about it and read him childrens books about the subject. I would hate for him to find out some day when he's older, that's a hard secret to keep from someone. I don't want him to feel like there was some shame involved with his being adopted and not our "real" child. I know that sometimes there are hurt feelings when the child gets older and may decide to search for his birth mother but I think much more damage could be risked by not telling the child. Anyway, I just had to chime in there, it's a subject that's pretty near and dear to my heart.

I agree, timeonmyhands. My mother was adopted at 3 weeks old and from the very start my grandmother told her she was adopted and explained what it was over and over, bluntly but gently if that's possible. I believe this is the main reason my mom never felt less special or left out or any of those kinds of feelings many adopted children have. Only more pain can come out of not telling the kid, then they'll question everything they've ever known. I've had a couple of friends who got the opposite treatment as my mom as far as knowledge goes, with disasterous results.

The episode itself was pretty Maury-ish, which is sadly where this show is going anyway.

Wow, glad I missed the adoption show! I read the description of it beforehand and decided it did sound too Mauryish and opted out.
Thanks for the name compliments, guys! I hold DeBarge videos up as a symbol of everything that was wrong with the 80s, fashionwise, so there is sort of a so-bad-it's-amazing obsession going on there...anyway, back on-topic.

Jay has a girlbutt.

Oh I'm sure you're doing the right thing TOMH. I'm just saying what my reaction is to all those sad adoption reunion shows. All the child psychologists say that telling them from the start is the way to go. Good on ya for adopting! I love it when a baby goes to a waiting, loving home, instead of the FUF kind of mess.

I hope I didn't come off sounding defensive or anything cause that's not how I meant it. :) To be totally honest I the idea of my son wanting to meet his birth mother someday scares the living crap out of me. I can say that I would be ok with it (and honestly, if he wanted it, I would help him however I could) but I know that I would be feeling really sad, like maybe he thought I wasn't good enough. That's probably par for the course though.

What makes our sons adoption somewhat unusual is that he came to us as a 3 week old foster child, only supposed to stay with us for a few weeks. A few weeks turned into a year and we just celebrated his 2 year adoption aniversary in Feb. If he decided to try to track down his birth parents someday, the county we adopted him through will have pretty much all the info he needs. My problem is, his birth parents could not take care of him. I'm not even sure is birth mother waned to so I know that he would be dissapointed in what he found. He didn't have a birth mom who made a loving choice, he had one whos rights were taken away after being extremly neglegant (sp?). I don't think there would be a happy, tearful reunion for him. That makes me sad too. I stuggle with what to tell him about her. Right now he doesn't understand the concept of a "birth mom" so right now I'm in the clear. But someday I'll have to tell him something. How much is too much information? What exactly does he have a right to know. How can I be honest without being cruel? Those are just some things I think about.

Anyway, I know it's a bit off topic but this episode of DP brought up all kinds questions and emotions for me. I still think he sucks, I just get emtional when it comes to almost anything about adoption.

Timeonmyhands, I just had to respond to you. I am a 29-year-old adoptee, so I can really relate to your family situation. My parents did the adoptive parent thing in the best possible way: my mom started telling me the story of my 'birth' in my cradle and there's never been a time when I didn't know how I became a part of my family. My mother used to focus the story so much on how desperately she wanted a baby, how she prayed and prayed for one, and how she 'fell in love' the first time she saw me, that I didn't dwell much on what my bio mother was like or what motivated her. I do know that she was a teenager and still in high school, but that's about it. Ultimately, you son's bio mom was sick, and couldn't take care of him, maybe that's all he needs to know until he's old enough and secure enough to deal with more info.

As an adult I have never had the least desire to know my bio family. Medical records were provided at birth and, frankly, only if I, or my child, had some medical need would I consider beginning a search for them. Theres no anger there, I did open the records on my end so that if there was some woman out there who was consumed with wondering what happened to her baby, I could put her mind at rest. I just know who my real mom and dad are: the people that raised me and only God, and maybe my husband, could love me more than they do. I know your son will feel as secure in your love as I do in my folks' and when the time comes, you will have nothing to fear if he wants to wrap up loose ends and search.

Gosh timeonmyhands, why don't you ask Dr. Phil??

[wait for it......] bwa ha ha ha haaaaa heee ....whew....

Unsolicited advice, as I know nothing of this subject: I know that NC at least has an adoptive resource center. Maybe something like that in your area could provide you with information on the nuts and bolts of "telling". And by the way, big time kudos to you and Mr. TOMH. How wonderful to provide a loving home to someone who needs it. My bestest girl friend is adopted and she says it always made her feel more special because she knew her adoptive parents truly wanted her.

To add my two cents, My exboss and his wife adopted after trying to have a kid for about ten years. Less than two years after they adopted she got pregnant and had the kid 30 months after the apoption. They gave up their parental rights to the adopted boy when he was almost five. My point is not all adopting parents are fit. My personal belief is adopted parents are better because they have to go thru more to have children as a rule but there are horror stories on both sides.

Not fit for children...nor walk amongst the rest of the human race. What a monstrous thing to do. What, so since they managed to create a goldensprog, there was no more room in their lives for their adopted child? What kind of a miscreant does something like that to a child?

We get Dr. Shill twice a day where I live. Today was the repeat of the Teen Weight Loss Challenge. Some of those children are losing FOUR pounds per week? That isn't healthy, especially for growing bones. And why on earth would Shill and Son of Shill encourage that young lady to get up in the middle of the night to exercise? I hope she doesn't go outside and run or anything!

I enjoyed a delicious Dove ice cream bar whilst listening to father and son pontificate.

I pretty much lurk on these boards but I wanted to comment about the adoptee and searching thing.

I did my own search at around age 28 (using a search agency) because there were questions that I wanted answered that went beyond the very basic biographical information my parents had been supplied with when I was born.

If you decide to search, I think it is very important to be secure in who you are and your identity *before* you start searching. You can't do it just because you have some idea about the grass being greener or you've never grown past the childhood fantasies of your birth parents being King and Queen of some wonderful foreign land (mine always looked like Homer Simpson's chocolate fantasies!).

The other thing is to understand that everyone involved has moved on and that includes your birthmother. She is not the 16-year-old of "X" number of years ago. She may be married and have a family of her own. That family may or may not know about you. I spent a lot of time trying to imagine all possible outcomes, which included the fact she might not want to see me at all. I had to make sure I was going to be okay with the fact that my search might end in "No, I don't want to meet you." If that was her choice, that was a choice I would have to respect.

I used a search agency to pave the way as an intermediary and she ultimately did agree to meet me. We have a friendly/friends relationship but there are obvious gaps since she wasn't there for every moment of the past 30 plus years. The people who adopted me were and they are the ones I still refer to as my parents. Searching didn't change that for me. All it did was give me some closure for those last dangling threads.

And not just that, but Dr Phil was pleased about it. He repeated it twice, as the main accomplishment. "She lost 80 pounds in just four months." And then later, announced that she'd managed to lose four pounds per week. Apparently he believes that the goal is too lose weight as fast as possible. And this is why psychologists should never be allowed to give diet advice.

maggiegault:

You know, when I took Psychology a few semesters ago, we were taught that such extreme exercising was a body image disorder, similar to an eating disorder. Exercising every day is great, but 3 hours?

I myself have a psychologist and, since I have been feeling pretty good lately, we spent my monthly session last week just shooting the bull (my therapist is a good guy, a real hoot. I think we're friends as well as shrink/patient.)

Anyway, we get to talking about Shill and Son of Shill, and therapist blanched. "I can't believe that guy," he said. "Encouraging that rapid of weight loss in children? Sure, they are teenagers...but you aren't finished growing at 13 and 14."

I agreed with him.

He went on: "He's also messing with kids during their most formative teenage years. Kids that age have enough on their minds without being told that they are sub-par people because they are overweight. Kids that age should be encouraged to cultivate what's inside; the outside will take care of itself."

Eating my Dove bar (delish), I was amazed at how Shill was preaching about how other kids make fun of fat people, and that if your child is overweight, you should buy the Shill book RIGHT AWAY so the kid can get thin and therefore acceptable. Um, no, Phil...that's NOT how it should be. How about taking to task those kids who think they are so cool that they can torment an overweight person? Is Shill's desperation to sell books so great that he will indirectly sanction a very unhealthy epidemic in our children's schools and lives?

Regarding today's show, does anyone think someone finally called out DP that he's giving out shitty advice (Oprah maybe?)? It seemed like after every guest on his show he would say things like are you sure you're losing weight at a nice rate, not too fast, are you being healthy about it? He never gave a fuck before. He probably doesn't now, he's just covering his ass. I am kind of glad he had a guest on there that admitted to taking her weight loss too far, they just glazed over it way too fast though.

Maggiegault, You are right about my exboss and his wife. My coworkers and I could not imagine what the kid must have felt no matter what they told him. As far as Dr. Shills advice for parents of fat kids that the kids need to loose weight so they are not bullied. That is the opposite of his advice to kids that are bullied. That it is not their fault someone bullies them. It is the bullies that have the problem. I also do not think there will be much more on the FUF2. There are only about six weeks of the season left.

Again, the weight falls off fast sometimes when you're young. I wouldn't necessarily say that there's a problem with those kids.

Freaky Giant Legs was back today; Dr. Pill said she's progressing, but he didn't say how much she's lost, he wouldn't give any numbers. Hmmmm...

I wouldn't necessarily say so either. But that doesn't mean that Dr Phil should be stating it as an accomplishment, something that the kids should be aiming for. That's the part that concerns me, more than the rate of weight loss itself.

Not so sure about that! When my son went to college, he indulged in all the junk food he could manage and had never been heavy before. He gained about 80 lbs and was really heavy for his frame at 5'8". One day, he just decided he was taking it off and he went on a no-fat, no carb diet and lost it almost overnight, or so it seemed. He also lost most of his hair, muscle tone and his pituitary was way out of wack. When I saw him on break, I almost fainted. I was alarmed as he was nothing but skin and bones and slept all the time. I bought him a nutrition book and told him that he HAD to have some fat and carbs in his diet! It had to be balanced.

He looks great now and most but not all of his hair has grown back in. If kids are going to go on diets, they MUST be monitored and the diet must be balanced. DP doesn't stress that enough, I feel.

As for the FUF2 family, they'll be back.

maggiegault, I salute your ostentatious display of passive aggression!





katymo, I was going to post the same thought. First he's condoning losing 180 pounds in under 5 months, now he is chanting the "make sure you check w/ your doctor before starting any diet blah blah liabilitycakes" like all the other hokey diet advertisements.

Dr. Hack.

eta: talullahbabe, that is so scary about your son! So glad you were able to set him on the path of sensible nutrition.

(further edited because "diet" is not "deity", even if Dr. Shill thinks he is one)

RE: Today's Show

Now Dr.Phil gives away free babies!

...with every purchase of The Ultimate Weight-loss Challenge/Food Guide™?

No. All you have to do is agree to follow his advice and then will he grant you fertilization treatments. If you're a bad little guest, no baby for you.

But you get a free Dr. Phil Diet Book.

A shot of Robin today making her Robin face shed some light on why she can't seem to open/close her mouth correctly. She had her cheeks stapled to the back of her head. Which is fine, as long as she's thin, okay?!

Y'all just made me laugh so hard I got an ice cream headache from Maggiegault's Dove bar.

The father who wouldn't let his wife take their kid to the doctor was an ass. Note to the wife: No more kids until he trusts you.

I didn't like him either, I don't get these "don't take medicine unless you HAVE to people", there's no valor in suffering unessecarily becuase it makes you tough. And she's a baby, she doesn't understand, can't be patient thorough or deal with discomfort.

Also, I agreed with the way DP handled him, telling him he's just not smart enough to tell if the baby is really sick or not. My sis-in-law is a pediatric ER nurse and she's just now able to tell at a glance 'n feel how sick a kid really is, let alone some doofas who knows nuthin' about kids and medicine.

ITA about the dad today. I got the scare of my life when my littlest brother slept over one night and got all wheezy on me. I have been saying for years that the kid is asthmatic and needs to be on maintenance inhalers (I have asthma and know what it sounds like) and my dad kept saying no, he's fine. Scare of my life, let me tell you. And the worst part? 9 times out of 10, he'll be in obvious distress to me, and I'll ask him how he feels and he'll say he feels fine. And I'll ask him if he needs his medicine and he'll say no. That's why kids need to have adults around!

I'm new on this board, hi!! I agree about the dad who didn't want his baby taking medicine. What an idiot. My son was also jaundiced his first week of life. It wasn't that big of a deal. We just took him to the lab at the hospital and they took a blood sample on two different days to see if he improved, which he did, and that was that. Also, a baby can't blow her nose when she has a cold. Of course she needs Dimetapp, poor thing.

What swear word was the swearing baby saying? I missed that part.

Shit.

Yeah, that's what the show is, DrCher, but what was the kid saying? Ha ha. Cheap shot, I know. :) Seriously, though, that sort of cracked me up when the woman was like, "Er, my kid's saying this word b/c I use it all the time. What's up with that?" Yep -- kids. They will repeat what they hear, especially if you freak out when they say it.

I'm not the medical establishment's biggest fan, but that dad really bugged me. I mean, I could see his point if the mom had been hauling the kid to the ER every week or something. But, that clearly wasn't the case. The dad had TWO times (IIRC) that he referred to and both were when the child had been under a month old. Not taking the INFANT to the doctor in those circumstances (jaundice, fever) would be neglect in my book. I'll give Phil credit for basically telling the guy he simply doesn't have the expertise to make the call on if the child is really sick or not.

Word! However, his advice to Jennifer and Dave really bugged me.

Jennifer's problem was not a phobia of childbirth. Her problem is an overly pushy husband! Why exactly does she have to be pregnant by their 1st anniversary? What is the huge rush? Most couples take time to be together before introducing children into the mix. HE decided that they have to have 8 children and when to start having them. Jennifer probably feels that she has no control over when to start their family and that's why she is locking him out of the bathroom.

I can't say that I blame her. Phil should have mentioned to Dave that his insistance on having his way is why Jennifer is suffering from this "childbirth phobia".

Man Robin looked horrible on today's show!! Her face was tighter than a brand spankin' new trampoline and her eyes were all yellow and beady. It was scarier than anything I've ever seen on this show!

Yes, but nothing is worse than Botoxic Robin's voice. Props to her, tho, for not using a feigned baby-doll Marilyn Monroe Jackie O whisper. She seems like the type.

I have decided that DP finds the most wretched, dumb people, gives them a new haircut, lets Robin dress them up, and the parades them in front of us in the name of entertainment, because these last couple of days have had nothing to do with psychiatry, psychology, or helping anyone except DP's ratings. These people literally make me sick with their stupidity.

Case in point: the guy who does not want to give his child medicine when the Dr. recommends it. What the fuck? Until he gets his damn medical degree, I think I am going to side with the guy with DOCTOR in front of his name. To think that he knows better, is just mind-blowing to me. And the guy who wants 8 kids- sure you do, when you are not the one birthing them. To his defense, though, I want to know if she knew about the whole 8 kids thing before they married.

And today, it just gets better and better. The 35 year old that wants her mother to stay out of her life, but keep footing the bill? Ick. The temper tantrum mom witth the wimpy son? Even DP got irritated at them. And I wholehartedly disagree with the tardy mom. Having a tardy mom, I can tell you- sometimes, it is just time- management problem. It is nothing passive aggressive; it is not about arrogance. It is just a person that has gotten away for it all these years, so she does not make the extra effort to be on time.

Not to beat a dead horse, but I really hate that no medicine father.

My neurologist is pushing me to get botox injections for my migrianes (yes, they're that severe) but now, after seeing what they do to Robin, I'm terrified! Do you think it's possible that she somehow overdosed on botox?

I'm afraid I agree with Dr. Phil here. Everyone's late occasionally. But if someone is habitually late, then it shows that they don't value others' time. They put their own needs ahead of everyone else's. If your mother "does not make the extra effort to be on time," then she is choosing to inconvenience and annoy those who are stuck waiting for her. She may not be conscious of the reason, but IMO that kind of perpetual tardiness is both arrogant and passive-aggressive.

I used to have a friend who was late every day of our Senior year in High School. She was also late every time we went to a party, to the movies, etc. It was annoying as hell. But when she got a job, guess what? She was never late to the place that cashed her checks. Time management, my ass. She was just rude and self-centered.

Can you tell I'm still a little bitter? Sorry to take out all my frustration on borokat's Mom. I'm sure she's a lovely person.

Re the no-meds-Dad: My husband caught that part of the show and said, "What an asshole" before I did. Heh.
I didn't quite understand the temper-tantrum-throwing Mom and her son. He's 30 and works for the family. But the caption under his name (Joe Bob?!!!) said, "Mom pays for car and rent" and the caption under her name said, "Pays for son's car and rent." Okay. So which is it? Does she support him financially? Or is she his employer and writes his checks? I was away for part of the segment and really missed the gist of it. When I came back, Dr Phil was mad because he wouldn't stand up to her.
Since I'm confused, I'll try to catch it again when it comes on today.
If you name your kid Joe Bob, you have to expect he'll grow up to be a tool, right?