Yesterday's cult show was my first time viewing a DrPhil program. Are his shows always so meandering? I don't know what I expected, but I guess I thought he would give them some tools or help them articulate just what the Fawns' feelings are. I never heard him tell the Fawns just how freaking brave they were for running away. For some reason, I found that to be sorely lacking. The 2 girls needed to hear that they are to be commended for doing what they did.

Also, the religiosity of Phil was waaaaay over the top. I'm not sure if that was important yet in these girls' recoveries.

He should definitely have given them tools on how to deal with their peers.

I, for one (?) are glad this is out in the open. Colo City and Hildale are getting state and fed'l tax money. It's wrong.

Very EST-like of $hill, no? Anyone else remember EST?

$hill would do well to remember that most folks have limitations as to the amount of change they can implement in their lives. Finances, beliefs (religious, political, whatever), career choices, illness, family situations etc. might limit some, and oh, good manners might limit others. For instance, instead of concentrating on those two horrific m's-i-l (yeah, we know they're behaving badly, any fool can see that), he should've helped that son grow a spine - and some tact, to walk the line between respecting his mother and telling her when to butt out.

Does Phil allow potty breaks?

I spent so long in social work, tearing off pieces of my ultra liberal heart, that every ridiculous thing Phil throat farts will either make me continue my activism while poking gleeful fun of him, or give up completely and Plath out in the GE oven. It is hard to see someone so limited, so fatuous, so disingenuous offering nothing in a Texas twang while holding so much power and not make, you know, obvious observations about it. Ahem.

I am so using this from now on. "I had a such a rotten day, I'm going to Plath out in the GE oven now." Bwah, and thanks, KP.

Time for my potty break, gotta go now.

KettlePorn, will you be my new BFF? "Plath out in the GE oven," indeed.

But, remember, Phil was sooooo poor growing up that all the kids had to share one pair of shoes, and they had to eat dirtcakes for dinner.

If he can do it...everyone can!

I need to go find a wall to bang my head against now.

Straying a wee bit from the current conversation, but...

Adding to my love of all things muppety is my childhood favorite Sesame Street. My sister calls me and screams into the phone "turn it to channel X!"

What do my eyes see but a DR.PHIL MUPPET! His name is Dr. Pheel, he runs a talk show with a southern accent, and gives hilariously innane advice. But the best part? At random intervals, including while other (muppet) guests are talking, he turns to the camera and screeches "BUY MY BOOK".

I thought I was going to die laughing.

ETA: Just in case anyone thinks I am making this up (because, really?, I wouldn't have believed it if I hadn't seen it), it is mentioned on PBS's website

Today's show - overweight bald, married guy (sound like anyone we know?) impregnates wife and mistress. Both of these women want him. But why? The show was just - ick. Luckily it's a two-parter.

Oh, God, they're all just horrible. I don't understand the man's appeal. I don't think he's too smart. He's definitely not attractive...so what is it? Big dick? A whole host of headboard tricks? I just don't get it. Makes me want to go "Plath out in the GE oven." (Thanks, Kettleporn, for that gem.)

And, of course, he's just re-upped for five more years of this swill.

He probably stole Jerry's move and uses crib notes.



FIVE more years of him? Gods above, what did the human race do to deserve that? Was it polyester? American Idol? What? Whatever it was, we re-fuckin-pent.

Two-timing bald husband fascinates me. Maybe it's because he looks just like he did when he co-starred each week in The Addams Family, and that was, what, forty years ago?

In an ideal world, such bugly women-haters would get neither trim nor talk shows, and not even The Dixie Chicks would be allowed to re-do "Landslide." But I'm talking ideal.

It's true that two-timer hubby is not easy on the eyes. Maybe he does have some bedroom moves, but since he clearly doesn't respect women, I don't think that's the case. I bet in addition to a fat body, he's got a fat wallet.

Maybe, but how could such a specimen be wealthy enough to entice two women? I wouldn't kiss him with Melania Trump's lips.

It's not five more years, it's NINE more years:

"Dr. Phil McGraw has landed a blockbuster, $75-million deal that will keep him on the air at least through 2014."

God help us all.

I watched the two-timing husband eppy today. I am with those of you trying to figure out what exactly the guy has that two women want.

A very similar scenario is playing out in my family. A relative just found out that her husband is cheating on her. Let me tell you, the husband is no prize. He's bald, short, fat and fugly. And he's a big jerk too. Turns out he recently admitted that he's been having affairs since the beginning of their marriage (almost 10 years). For the life of me, I'm trying to figure out how he could even get one woman, let alone multiple women!!! He's got a decent job, but he's certainly not that well off. The only good part of this scenario is that there are no children involved at all. Oh, but the worst part is that he admitted to her that he had UNPROTECTED SEX with ALL of the women he had affairs with. WTF???

BTW, the wife on the show...if she would flip her hair under, rather than up would look incredibly similar to Martha Stewart.

Maybe he'll go the way of the Morton Downey Jr Show, Shill's opinionated, loud mouth ancestor, and people will just get tired of him and he'll fade away from the airwaves from low ratings.


I recall the Morton Downey Jr show got caught having fake guests on (a la porn star twins) and was criticized for not doing thorough background verification of its guests.

What I wish psychological professionals like Phil would realize about cases like these is that when people say "we just can't stop" that usually means that they get off on not having control. I could tell that they both could just salivate at the fact that they couldn't get enough of each other. And it's terribly slighting to his wife because she feels inadequate.

It seems like there is quite a competition between wife and mistress (more so on yesterday's show). "He tells me that he loves me more than anyone else!" "Yeah? Well he told me the same thing yesterday!" I think the fact that they were best friends is what finally drove the wife to take her head out of the sand. I don't get why either of these women would be interested in Uncle Fester. Are these just the kind of people who get off on drama? I don't believe "Sarah" really puts her kids first. I don't believe that for a minute. And I'm surprised $hil didn't suggest a vasectomy for Baldy.

Neither of them would put their kids first. Honestly, and it's not that they dont love them, their kids can't express their emotions so their parents don't consider them.

I think I just heard my psychologist husband scream a little when I read that!

Phil is not a professional! He's an entertainer!

;)

Lev: Dr. Phil has actually had Dr. Pheel on the Dr. Phil Show. Dr. Pheel entertained a multicultural group of adorable moppets. I wish Pheel had done a bit of "buy my book" snark there, but no such luck. I'm glad they're poking some fun at him on Sesame Street, and perhaps influencing the next generation of snarkers.

Oh, how this cloggy lived a happy, $hill-free live in Italy... Sadly, that had to come to an end, and she had to go back to H2olland. There she was greeted by a motherlode of h2o and a hilarious comedy show called "Aging gracefully with Robin." Ofcourse, after that there was no way she wanted to go back to Italy, she was glad to be home, home sweet home, Cloggyland.

At this point this cloggy is slightly confused... A look outside her window tells her it's winter. Her calendar tells her it's summer. $hill tells her it's Christmas with the tackiest Christmasparty the world has ever been exposed to. Nothing is sacred anymore. Nothing.

This cloggy was also happy to find out that BBJ has found himself something to do (or his dad did, one can argue over that one.) Although she is kind of worried about the poor soul that probably lost his job. What about him/her? What about his/her family? Either way, this cloggy is glad that BBJ has something else to ponder about, instead of just:'Which one of the three was it last time?'

Also, this cloggy likes to share things. Positive things. Things that work for her. Like reading the small letters. She can recommend it to everbody. You'll learn really interesting things. Take for example the small letters at the bottom of the official $hill site. There it says: "Copyright 2005 Peteski Productions." Now this cloggy can remeber that it used to say "Copyright 2005 Harpo Productions." Word is that Peteski is owned by... oh, you will not believe this one... $hill! Now, what happened there? Did the O take Kitty to Rodeo Drive, and did Kitty spend to much, more that she's allowed to? Was the O too opinionated? Did her dog assault $hill's super intelligent, perfect, role-model, too-good-to-be-true dog? Oh, what in this world happened?

This cloggy would also like to suggest that we all hold a minute of silence at noon. So we can think of and pray for everybody affected by the fact that $hill will be giving "advice" for 9 more years...

Now if you'll excuse this cloggy. She has to do some Christmas shopping, just to be sure...

Welcome back to Shil-land, mutya. You scamp, you! Hey, how's the nutcracker selection in Italy? Been thinkin' of going there, and of course the basics such as nutcracker selections must be ocnsidered.

'Dr. Phil Show' renewed through 2013-14 season

WHAT?!

Think he'll make it to the finish line? That's a long passage in the life of a large man with anger management issues and a general intolerance for most of humankind. He could get accosted by a NOW leader and a female Fat Acceptance spokesperson in a VIP lounge somewhere at the exact same moment, demanding respect. Kablooie.

Remember the old 1930's newsreels where there were just seconds between,"To see this glorious, huge inflated spectacle before the cheering crowd is to be awed" and "Oh the humanity!"

Hooray -- the "Be A Guest On The Show" section of the Dr. Phil web site is back! I find these upcoming topics particularly relevant:
Do You Know the Most Annoying Person in America?
WANTED: People Who Only Like Pretty People!
Want to Learn How to be a Good Wife?

Pardon my indelicate impudence, but what the fuck is a "good wife"?

I just assumed that for the purposes of the show, "good wife" = "exactly like Robin." What do you want to bet that Robin will take some poor woman in hand and teach her the joys of rising at 5 AM to exercise, having regular Botox sessions, making Jell-O and enjoying "girl time" in the bath.

FWIW, here's what it says on the site:

Why, $hil can be a guest on his own show!

Well, I don't know $hill personally, but I sometimes watch him on TV...does that count?

Thanks, loudfan (I think). Did you notice how many repetitive titles there were? (I know, I know, why am I surprised). After reviewing the list, I found another show for Kitty to star in:

Don’t Stand Up for Yourself to Your Spouse?

And two for the boys:
Embarrassed by Your Parent’s Annoying Behavior?
Do You Have the Most Annoying Parents in America?

And let’s not forget this one – will it be an all-Phil hour?
Are you Extremely Prejudiced?

I did a search for Peteski Productions and found this website:

http://lifestrategiesatwork.com/pages/beyond_facts.htm

It says on the bottom of the page:
"Dr. Phil, Dr. Phil McGraw and Life Strategies are trademarks of and/or owned by Phillip C. McGraw, Ph.D. and/or Peteski Productions, Inc."

Is anybody watching his bastard son making a fool of himself on his sucky show, Renovate My Family? He is so patheic. I'm surprised that Jay hasn't got his own talk show yet.

Oh my God! parsleysage, you're not Kitty, are you?

Nutcrackers!

You know I used to think that nutcrackers were... nutcrackers, you know, something you use to crack nuts. Well, that was untill Kitty showed off her nutcracker collection, and put a huge nutcracker in her house for her christmas party. Why 3 shows about that?? Anyway, yesterday was funny. Jordan looked annoyed and bored, everytime I saw the look on his face I was rolling over the floor, laughing... Hate to say it, but I think I would get along with him very well.

Ok... Back to the nutcrackers, I haven't seen them. They could be there, since I usually don't really pay attention to nutcrackers, so I could have missed them...

I leave you all today with a part of a column, the whole column is basically one big snark to Renovate my Family, BBJ & $hill, but the end is, IMHO, the best part. I translated it for you (well.. I tried), since this was too good to not share.

*Snort* -- Best laugh I've had all day.

Why do folks on this thread refer to Robin as "Kitty"? Sorry if I missed it way upthread.

Oh, mutya you are too funny. I am a first-generation Canadian, both my parents are 100% cloggy. (My mom and I LOVED the UnDutchables, my Rotterdamer dad thought it went way too far with the mocking...)

Topic? I've got nothing....

Yo Nurse: A few months ago, someone on this board started referring to Robin as Kitty Surprise because her heavily Botoxed face has given her a perpetually startled look, and the nickname has stuck.

Thanks, loudfan . Is Kitty Surprise like Hello Kitty? I wonder if Robin's plastic surgeon is listed in the credits.

I'm guessing that he'll self-destruct before the new contract runs out or even before all of his fans get sick of him. My prediction: a big fat sex scandal involving a series of low-level female staffers/interns on his show.

completely off topic, again, please forgive me

lls59,
I LOVED that book :D, kind of embarrassing at times, since most of it is true.
Too bad your dad thought it went too far with the mocking. But hey, he's a Rotterdamer, and every Amsterdamer, like me, will tell you, they don't have a sense of humour (ok, just kidding, hope you understand :P)

I'm not such a good cloggy though. When people come over to my place for a gezellig bakkie koffie, they'll get as many cookies as they like.

Or this might do it!

Ouch. This might mean back to Hooterville with the lot of them.

LOL -- I wonder what "delusions" the soon-to-be-ex was suffering from! You notice the husband was ordered to undergo "mental health counseling"

"But yer honor.....that's what gave me the IDEA in the FIRST place!"

Reminds me of a book I read recently where a husband/father is kind of a safety nut, and forever trying to "teach his family a lesson" when he thinks they're slacking off on safety-consciousness (stuff like driving his wife's car around the block to hide it 'cause she left it unlocked -- leading to a VERY angry visit from the cops -- and leaving kid's backpack on the stairs since kid didn't put it away -- where the dad himself falls over it and goes to the hospital.) He "steals" his wife's purse when she turns her back on her grocery cart -- of course the cart and the purse belong to another woman entirely! Wacky hijinx ensue.

Topic? Back to lurkerdom!

I e-mailed the Dr Phil show last week. I suggested he do a show about pork rinds. I have not heard back. Maybe he's thinking it over?

KettlePorn, ok, I'll bite. What was the topic you suggested?

"Pork rinds broke up my marriage"?
"Observant Jews addicted to pork rinds"?
"Are pork rinds an aphrodisiac"?
"Pork rinds: neither pork nor rind, discuss"?

Was Jay going to do a special report about pork rinds and teens?
Was Kitty going to show how serving pork rinds makes one a good wife?

Details, I need details!

As soon as I read that, I had a vivid image of Kitty bouncing on a mini trampoline in workout wear circa 1987 (including the sweat band, full makeup, hairspray, sparkles, look of surprise etc.)...

Dreamy you forgot the segment where Kitty shows us how to make faux, non-caloric pork rinds out of papier mache, but otherwise you're spot on.

ETA: Eewwwwwwwwwwwww! I just perused the upcoming tropics again, only I thought of Phil's voice introducing them. Eeeeeeeeeewwwwwwwwww! "Is your husband strict?" Strict? WTF? No, Phillip. Teachers are strict. Bosses are strict. Parents are strict. Men who try to impose their standards on their wives lest their wives suffer some sort of consequences are evil, braindead, knuckle dragging bags of shit dust. Please edit your site, before we all (snort) start to think you're a --a--throwback to a time when American women were chattel, and needed to be lorded over by men. Thanks, darlin.

Hahahahahahahahahaha!!!! Thank you, KettlePorn!!!

Topic??? Well, if 'shit dust' ain't topic, I don't know what is!