Phil quoted Wham!? My head just exploded.

I'm with mootermutt: BassettCase, percolata? Y'all rock. There really aren't enough women in the world who can stand up to shit like whats-his-penis-problem.

Man, all these years I thought it was "Guilty feeling, I got no rhythm."

I'm sorry, George Michael. I'm sorry, Other Guy.

In other news, this show grated, but not becuse of the sad, sad people on so much as Dr. Phillatio's [paraphrased] comment that the woman had to choose between being a mother or a girlfriend. And, once again, he confirms that woman can only be what we are in relations to others.

Thanks, Phil.

It was actually Air Supply: "The best part of love is the thinnest slice," from "Lost in Love." And no, I didn't get that on my own; Mr. loudfan Googled it.

I think, in Brad's case, this is true. Here's my theory (based on painful personal experience): Guys (and gals, for that matter) who cheat on the sly and don't reveal their extracurricular activities to their spouses may well have a sexual addiction. But those who confess their indiscretions only to then wallow in this "torn between two lovers" bullshit? It's a power play...a sick one.

No, silly! That is in fact Wham!, it is Careless Whisper.

Guess I should have suggested he'd use the guilty feet line on Omarosa and Trump. Fell about as flat as my "one hand foreplay" line on the Oprah thread.

My biggest surprise is that Phil didn't quiz Brad about his childhood, how he must have been raised by neo-Nazi's who potty-trained him at gunpoint or something for him to have morphed into such a ridiculous excuse for a human being. Even the guy who was addicted to junk food and hockey got the "What deep dark horrible nightmarish thing are you repressing from about age four or five?" from Phil, who reduced the fellow to a blubbering heap who admitted sports and Doritoes represented "Mommy and the bad man."

Either Phil is changing horses, or there's a McGraw CD ready to drop. Phil McGraw: Country Lovin' Songs and Drawled Inspiration. Robin McGraw: I Hum For You (Because Nothing I Say is Worth A Damn). Jay McGraw: Rich Boy's Musings (Including "I Must Be Too Sexy For My Jeans[Because I Can't Zip The Damn Things]. Or, maybe Jordan McGraw:Gettin' The Hell Out (My Parents Scare Me).

My god Gemmadoll. You're very very funny!! You're basically the only reason why I'm still watching this bastard.

It is indeed Air Supply, who seem like the sort of band that Dr. Phil would listen to, even though they aren't country. Lyrics to "Lost in Love"

OT here for a moment but there's an absolutely hilarious Air Supply skit on the Best of Will Ferrell SNL DVD.

Now, whoa - here's what I don't understand about Phil-ibuster. If he's saying to the mistress that he can't love you if he doesn't put you first then why couldn't he tell the wife that too? It's clear he DOESNT love his wife but it so often seems to me that he feels that marriages have to be saved at all costs when this one is clearly over. That wife is going to stay with him and this same situation will play out as it has for the past 2 years because they haven't had any kind of adverse consequences for it. Both spouses do not have enough self respect to leave. You aren't doing your kids any favors by staying in relationships that you cheat in and it's clear that Brad will NEVEr be faithful regardless of who he's married to. Freaking scary.

Oh, and another thing that made no sense...Phil was telling both of the cheaters to never call each other, change phone numbers, etc but they have a kid together. So, is he saying this guy shouldn't be a father to his own kid?!?!?!

Loudfan, this:



was in response to this:



Which is Wham and not Air Supply. The other poster was replying to the above post, not what was apparently on the show.

In other news, thoughts of Dr Phil quoting Air Supply makes me think of Growing up Gotti and I must go bleach my brain now.

Aaaand once again, no one gives a damn about poor Junior Samples.

I'm looking forward to this weeks Feast O' Phil, embarrassingly enough, because May Sweeps brings out both the Tom Brokaw and the Courtney Love in him. He'll be all over the stage trying to pump up his ratings. Maybe next Sweeps he can invite Twopers along with Bambi Bembeneck and his fortunate first wife.

Oh and Phil, DO NOT invite Runaway Bride on, please. Leave her to Oprah. ("And when you were getting off the Greyhound bus at the first stop, the second stop, the third stop, did you think,'Maybe I should call home after I buy the beef jerkey? Maybe I should choose differently? I mean, you were riding a bus. A bus." )There are other reasons, but the main one is that we fear a slew of copycat bolters to such degree that it won't be safe for an elected bridesmaid to dye a shoe. Thanks.

I kinda suspect that is exactly what The Shill is saying. In all honesty, this type of thing happens everyday --- it's called adoption. Perhaps Mr. Cheatingwife could adopt the baby as his own. Perhaps not actual formal adoption. Whatever. But DON'T tell the kid that Mr. Cheatingwife isn't Daddy. Mr. Cheatinghusband can have his paycheck docked for support ---- he wouldn't have to know location/phone#/e-mail address of Mrs. Cheatingwife. If these two people could act like adults around each other, there would be no problem with Mr. Cheatinghusband being Daddy, but these two are like fire and gasoline ---- it's just ugly when they get together. In a perfect world (yeah, I know...), the poor kid would have a loving mother and a nurturing father, and Mommy and Daddy would have the kid's best interest at heart. In this case, this kid's Mommy and Daddy are fucked up --- I doubt either Mommy or Daddy are capable of putting Junior first. Maybe they could tell Junior the truth as an adult --- in case he needs a kidney or something. No need to post angry posts at me --- I know this solution sucks, but it's still probably better than the alternative.

Very true! I suspect with his neighbors, the Religious Right, watching, The Shill doesn't have the guts to tell a hopelessly doomed couple that they ought to just get a divorce, get it over with, and that Mr. HopelesslyDoomed should go with his mistress. Dr. Shill's house would probably be firebombed and he'd never get invited to the better neighborhood parties ever again. He never gives any absolutes, like "you should get divorced and move on", to married couples. He'll ask questions, like "why don't you leave him" to Mrs. Cheaterhusband, but asking is a lot different than telling. Granted, the final decision IS the couple's to make, but (particularly in this case) sometimes the couple is SO screwed up, that they are INCAPABLE of making such a decision. Come ON people --- Mr. Cheaterhusband has cheated on his wife 19/20/40 times (depending on who you ask and when you ask it)!!! Is there ANYONE out there who thinks she ought to fight for this marriage???? It's kinda like watching an engineer driving an out-of-control train barreling downhill towards a bridge that is out, and saying "what would happen if you jumped, and how would you FEEL about that?" instead of saying, "JUMP!!!" Ultimately, it's the engineer's choice to jump, but maybe he's so focused on doing something to save the train, and can't see the obvious, that he NEEDS someone to tell him the obvious.

To Mrs. Cheaterhusband: JUMP!!!

Can't underestimate the financial component in a dysfunctional couple's (in)decision to stay together. Separation and/or divorce usually means a BIG drop in lifestyle for both parties...unless they're rolling in dough, which most people aren't, and play nice, which most people don't. With the exception of child support, she loses access to a chunk of his income (unless she can afford a really good lawyer), and alimony's pretty much a thing of the past. He then has to pay child support, plus whatever the divorce settlement dictates, in addition to now having to fund his own living expenses. Eddie Murphy had it right..."HALF!!".

I think a lot of couples stay together when things get ugly because they've done the math.

Dr. Phil and Pat O'Brien, on this week's Dr Phil Primetime? What the fuckety-fuck? Seriously, I just saw the commercial, and it looks so ridiculous.

ETA: Found a description of it, Dr. Phil Confronts Pat O'Brien in Special.


I'm not sure how frequent of water cooler talk it was since I hadn't heard about it. But the commercial just showed the two of them facing each other in armchairs, and just looked very, very awkward, with lots of Phil calling Pat out.

What a sad way to live. I would rather live in a van down by the river, than live with a guy who has had 40 freakin affairs. And I don't know what the divorce laws are in their state, but I think with husband's marital conduct, wife should have a strong case for alimony, child support, and half his retirement.

But, if I were her, that would not be anywhere close to my main worry. My concern would be what kind of sexually transmitted disease could this asshat have given me? I mean, this could turn out really tragic, ie. her and the baby contracting AIDS, etc.

Wow, was that blonde "I wanna be a hooker twin" chick real or a cartoon? With all her twitching, hair twirling, pouting, and whining I could barely stand to watch her segment. Bleh.

Most. Annoying. Guest. EVER.

Might lessen your future husband prospects? Future husband prospects? WTF?

*bashes head against keyboard*


Is it just me, or was Philatio extra-special preachy today? Way get that young girl to think for herself by...um, telling her what to think.

I know I've said it before, but...I fucking HATE Phil McGraw. He is a pusillanimous, sanctimonious, smug, stupid, uninformed sonofabitch. The first segment was a total straw man argument. Of course, in Phil's Quest to present female sexuality as dangerous and in need of The Man's Reason in order to get it under control, he has Twitchy McTwin, her Wannabe Pimp, and the Suffering Survivor of Sex to discuss how fucking BAAAD sex is--unless it's with a Future Husband Prospect. And when Wannabe Pimp and Twitchy McTwin actually do have a couple of good points, Fucking Bastard Phil gets all bitchtacular. "You don't tell me what to say, girlie!"

Um. GIRLIE??!!?? The hell??

Don't get me started on the Suffering Survivor of Sex. Honestly, I think legalized prostitution isn't that bad a thing. The circumstances surrounding Twitchy and Triple S's decisions to enter into the sex industry seem as different as night and day--and Lord God Phil ain't trying to hear it. Because Lord God Phil must be right--about everything.

The second case with the Spineless Wonder and her very own Cletus made me want to scream. First off, if Spineless Wonder is 18+ and not living at home, then the mistakes are hers to make. Second, if the parents objected to Cletus from the time SW was a junior in high school, then--and maybe this is my myopic view of parenting based on having had a mother who could have given the Pentagon security lessons--why the fuck didn't they fucking PARENT and say, "As long as you live under THIS here roof and eat our food and breathe our air, you are NOT going to see Cletus"?

Of course, Lord God Phil makes it all about the girl. He says maybe two words to Cletus and avoids the obvious questions, like, "Why the fuck are you giving a minor alcohol? You're controlling and psychologically abusive, aren't you? And isn't this why you picked a wallflower--because she wouldn't be hip to your tired game?"

Why, I think I know why Lord God Phil didn't ask those questions--he's a psychological manipulator his damn self.

On to case three, the Dumbfuck Dad and the video games of doom. Again, Lord God Phil makes it abundantly clear that he doesn't think that Dumbfuck Dad isn't a Bad Dad. Lord God Phil might as well have given Dumbfuck a blow job right then and there, the way he was trying to fluff him.

The moral of today's show: Women are sluts. Stupid sluts. Who can't be trusted to make a decision if their life depended on it. Men rule, even when they do stupid shit that should mean their exclusion from the gene pool. So saith Lord God Phil.

For a moment I thought Dr. Phil was gonna issue a drug test. Anybody else think she is abusing drugs?

I mean, Jeebus, ITA. I was watching this woman, thinking, come on Philsbury Dough Boy, could ya ask her any questions as to maybe why she felt so traumatized? She seemed so over-the-top, I suspect there was abuse before she joined the sex industry.

But,oh no, in Phil's view, women are weak, sad little victims who must be protected from sex at all costs.

And, for the second day in a row, we hear the old tired "women are defined in terms of their relationships to others" argument ("That's someone's sister! That's someone's daughter!!!") Ack, I hate that.

The guy from the Bunny Ranch DID have a few goods points: rates of disease tranmission are lower with him than unregulated, at least it's safe, the women are treated well, etc. But Phil is having none of that, oh, hell no. In his best "talk to the hand" tone, Phil in all his widom exlplains, for the first time ever that it's not about money! Since when, Phil? Since the last time you said money was the number one thing that couples fight about? Or since the last time you talked about how growing up poor made you a candidate for nomination into sainthood?

But, I say again: it's ALL ABOUT the future husband prospects!

I guess the questions still lingers - can a ho be turned into a housewife???

Thank you, Blkchile401! I was watching and saying, "This girl is seriously high on either coke or meth." She was way out there. No way LordGodPhil was gonna get through. And let's not legalize prostitution. Let's continue with the way things are, because they are hunky-dory with the little girls and the disease and the violence. It kills me how he just outshouts people who dare to disagree with His Holiness.

Oh, and did y'all notice LordGodPhil's body language when the guy from Bunny Ranch dared challenge his Fatuousness? He stood up and loomed over old boy. I mean, come on. I wish that motherfucker would try to physically intimidate me by standing up and trying to outshout me.

Kimberlee, I forgot about the "this is someone's mother/sister/daughter/yadda yadda" crap. I mean, really, LordGodPhil? I had no idea that the women who slide down poles actually have other human relationships? We must now protect them! Well, hell, for that matter, let's not have women do anything that might besmirch their Virtue that must be preserved until that blessed evening with her betrothed--who, by the way, can stick his willy whithersoever he wilt, for he is male and is blessed of the LordGodPhil. So let it be babbled, so let it be done.

Word to all of you who said the Dumb Bimbo was on coke or meth. She was just all over the place - gesturing wildly, puffing out her collagen-injected lips. If she wants to be a prostitute, good for her. I don't like how she was trying to push her sister into it, but, hey, they're adults, let them make their own choices.

As far as the Spineless Wonder goes, if she was 15 or 16, I'd understand the parents' anger. But she's over 18! If you don't like her lifestyle, then kick her and her canopy bed out of the house to the nearest apartment. Teach her some independence, for Jeebus's sake. I bet her parents told her what to think and feel for her entire life, and they are upset that she stopped parroting them and started following someone else.

What a parade of misfits today...and that's really saying something after that disgusting beast of a cheating "husband" and his harem last week...

Can.Not.Believe. Phil didn't throw skanktwin into rehab, I really thought with it being sweeps and all, that was exactly the kind of event that might take place. And with her genetic match sitting next to her it was clear that the behavior was not an innate temperment thing. I had zero time for Princess and her surgically altered father and stoic mother and disgusto boyfriend, though I almost could stand HIM by the end of it; didn't realize she was over 18 till I saw it here on the boards...

She said she had been sexually abused as a child.

Damn you, bad spelling I did not catch!!! (Shakes fist at sky)

I missed the former abuse statement, completely. But, not at all shocking that it happened.

I find it odd and very uninsightful that Phil didn't even try to explore her sexual abuse contributing to her attraction to the sex industry.

But, then again, that would mean I expected him to do something insightful.

Dead Ringer No. 1 not wanting to take no for an answer until she was sure Dead Ringer No. 2 had looked at ALL the options? What other options? There are so many career opportunties in that field. Let's see, call girl, "escort", hooker, street walker. So many options I want to explore before I just flat out say no. Thanks, sis.

Spineless Wonder, hmm, wonder how she got that way? Daddy made all her decisions for her, she just went out and got a different boss. Stay with him, honey, you're useless anyway.

I'm so looking forward to him kicking Assarosa's ass but he's gonna "F" that up, too.

KimberleeJean, I loved your typo. "Sex Inudistry" seems an apt descriptor.

Bwhahahhaha!! That had to be the funniest shit KingLordGod Dr Phil was ever faced with because not only was Whore Barbie twin (NOW WITH 100% MORE SKANK) twitchy and babbling, the alleged Non-Whore Barbie twin (NOW INCLUDES CHASITY BELT) was not so much coherent either. Complete thoughts and sentences seemed to readily escape the pair. They both looked like they were tweaking and posing, for what I'm not sure. I couldn't hear the voices in their head(s).

Good shit, Philip. Thanks, too for the commercial for the Bunny Ranch. Again, Bwhahahhaa!

Could I call bullshit on those TwinCrackWhores making half a million a year? Because fully half of that profit will be in eaten up in providing paper bags for the clientele.

Horrific child abuse and torture. Child rape. Incest. Women and children held captive. Mind control. Welfare fraud. Corrupt law enforcement. All of this flourishing under the Arizona sun, while politicians on both sides of the aisle as well as our most vociferous "Hang around the hospice" religious mouthpieces remain silent.

Maybe we should start a rumor that Warren Jeffs and his ilk are teaching children that "Homosexuality is a normal part of the human behavioral spectrum and therefore adult, American homosexuals should be granted the right to both civil and sacred unions and have those marriages legally recognized."

You know, get this shit on the front page.

I've seen that guy from the Bunny Ranch on yesterdays show on some HBO documentrys and he is a complete and total sleazeball. That said I thought he made some good points about why sex work should be legalized. I thought the "sex industry survivor" lacked credability and insight. I was a little suprised that no one pointed out to her that her trauma and flashbacks might have had more to do with her abuse as a child than her work as an adult.

Dr Phil is an idiot. I think it's totally possible for a woman to make a thought-out choice to enter the sex industry and be happy with it. I"m not talking about your $5 a pop local crack whore here by the way, I'm refering to someone who is more in control of their life and prostitute by choice and not a need to pay for that next fix. Would I want my daughter doing it? You're darn tootin' I wouldn't but there are a lot of things I wouldn't want my hypothetical daughter doing (coal miner, fighter pilot, nun) but that doesn't mean that it's not right for someone else.


You know, the Bunny Ranch guy is someone's son too. Didn't Dr Phil think he should go a little easier on the poor guy? I mean, he might be someone's brother or uncle! Oh wait, you mean it's ok for a man to make whatever choices he wants because he's not forever tethered by his family relations? Oh that's right. I forgot I was talking about good ol' Phil "Double Standard" McGraw.

. Funny shit!!
Looking forward to the Mormons Gone mad eppy today. Wondering how Shill will make it clear that the 14 year old girls are seducing the 65 year old men astray.

Me, too. I'm pretty interested to see how Philter Pheeder will spin his usual, "Parents know best, kids are always wrong, obey your parents cause you're not old enough/male enough to think for yourself" shpiel.

Do I hate him? Yes.

Will I watch? You betcha.

Sing it loud!

I got so frustrated listening to Spineless Wonder. She couldn't produce a coherent sentence, what with all the "you know's," "like," and "I mean's" she threw in there. She can't make her own decisions? Hell, she can't even speak.

I missed the Bunny Ranch guy. Too bad, because it sounds like good segment; or maybe too good, because my blood pressure would shoot right up there with all of yours!

And this gets my vote for laugh o' the day:

OK, it's 49 minutes into the show on the girls who escaped from that polygamous cult, and other than Dr. Phil's "God is forgiving" crap, he has not offered one word of advice or comfort to those girls. The whole episode is dedicated to having multiple experts tell us how horrible their situation was/is. Oh, reeeeee-allly? I would've never guessed, thank you. Cults are bad! Wow, what an insight! Oh, and of course, reminding us how omnipresent he is since even cult members with no access to TV know him as the secular messiah! Plus, is it just me or have there been 50,000 commercial breaks?

Oh, back from the break...now he's dispensing sage advice. Sigh. At last. I can rest easy knowing that they'll be alright, having received Phil's 5-Minute Pearls of Wisdom. Hopefully that Cult Expert can help them out for real and not just on TV.

People perpetuating child abuse, statutory rape, and spousal abuse in the name of religion enrages me beyond all belief. And Child Protective Services just sits back and thinks this is OK?!?! What the hell?

I may have missed it, but did Phil even ask her what her other reason for going into the sex industry was? I can't think up and good reason to do that, but maybe she has. And if she does why didn't he just ask about it point blank?

"Why do you want to become a legal prostitute?"

"Because of reason so and so."

"And you think you can only deal with reason so and so by having people pay you for sex?"

Then they could have gone into a whole "real root of the problem" spiel (fragmented sentences, overdone hand gestures, high as a kite attitude and all) he seems fond of those.

I'm not even going to comment on Miss spineless and her wishy washy parents. I am embarrassed to be in the same age bracket as her.

Double post! Sorry!

I live in Utah and sadly, it's true. Polygamy is Utah's dirty little secret. People here think that if they ignore the problem, it doesn't exist. Tom Green was a polygamist for years, was marrying little girls and making new ones but he didn't get in trouble until he went national and made Utah (read: mormons) look bad.

These girls have been in a lot of local newspaper articles and will be on the news tonight at 5:00 to tell of their experience with Dr. Phil. *yawn* Also on the promos they say "Dr. Phil takes on polygamy and Utah, see what the state has to say." That should actually be pretty interesting. If it is, I'll be back.

Wow...he didn't give those girls any great advice, but I do think they needed to hear from experts that they were victimized. I mean, they were conditioned to obey authority figures, so maybe before they can grow and leave that all behind them, they first need to hear from a bunch of authority figures about how bad that culture was. Does that make any sense?

I was pleased to see that Phil at least paid lip service to the idea that getting married, obeying a man, and having children aren't the only things women should do. Although it doesn't seem like that group was far off from some of his views, in some ways; there are huge differences in degree, of course, but on most of his shows it does seem like he thinks that being a good obedient wife and super mom are all that women should aspire to. Oh well...baby stepping toward the 21st century...

I think this show was a particularly good example of Shill being way the Hell over his head and not knowing what to do other than say "Cults are bad, mmkay?". And how is dragging those two up in front of a national audience is supposed to make them feel more normal?

But, on the other hand, he didn't fulfill parsleysage's prediction about them leading the older men astray. Points for restraint, I suppose.

Yeah, that's really adorable of Phil to believe that the Bible has shown him God is just about love and forgiveness and all. While that or may not be true, I think his Bible is missing a First Testament.

Phil was waaaaay in over his head. I didn't think he contributed any fantastic insight to the situation. The only thing useful those girls will get from him is therapy.

Of course, notice how Phil just had to ask if they had seen the show. How is that relevant to anything other than his ego? I can just picture those two girls staggering along the roadside with nothing, and then a woman in a van pulls up and shows them the shining light that is Dr. Phil. Hallelujah! They're saved!

Notice how Fawn (on the left) looked up at Dr. Phil like she was looking at the face of Christ and called him "inspiring." Anyone want to bet that these poor girls attach themselves to him as their next prophet?

I agree with you guys, Phil had no idea what to do with the trauma and brainwashing all of them went through. Come on now DP, the best you can do is say you believe in God and he is kind? Bah!

Because deep in his heart, he probably really doesn't see what's wrong with an older man exerting authority and assuming control over young women's lives and bodies. It must have nearly killed him to actually have to tell a woman that it was okay for her to leave her husband.

Definitely not just you. That was excessive.

The only thing I heard in that entire show that I felt was compassionate AND that addressed the problem was when the lady who rescued these gals said, "They're right. We [outside people] are wicked. But they are more wicked." Probably the most healthy advice in that whole freakish hour.

As I said in my post yesterday, it is astounding that this hundred year old situation gets very little ink. Phil may cock up a one chariot gladiator race (and he was very much the amateur this go round) but at least he inserted this human tragedy into his fluffy show during sweeps.

I know that he broached the girls with delicate religious reference out of necessity considering their indoctrination, but that made me cringe. I want to introduce all of these culted kids (including the ones who by coincidence of having only one mother get specials on the Discovery Channel) to the world full of light and reason, not more superstitions about elderly men who know what's best for young girls.

Phil kept saying the tragedy was that young girls were not allowed to think for themselves nor question authority, but I heard neither anger nor surprise in his voice. After all "lead" is his word.

Too true. If Shill really wants to amp up his visibility and popularity, he could "adopt" the town of Colorado City, just as he adopted that town in Texas. He can showboat his way in, trailed by scores of media cameras, harrrumphing and pontificating. If the public officials (and taxpayers) in that part of Arizona are helpless against that cult, let's see what Shill, with his big-time media access, can do.

Well, that's my fantasy. But it's soooo much easier for the big bald coward just to have the two Fawns on his show and tsk-tsk his way through an hour (minus all those commericals) during sweeps week. Good luck, young Fawns, it's the last we'll ever see of you.

Ha, I caught a tiny bit of the show between AI. Poor Dr. Phil, this was just out of his league. At least the cult guy can help, and that will be good.

I felt there was a total whitewash on the issue of one of the teen's sisters getting forced into marriage after the teen was already in custody. Dr. Phil blathered on about the dedication, etc. etc. and then some lady talked about the "politics" of it all -- yeah, when the police department and mayor are polygamists, who will take this issue on? Li'l ol' social workers are smart and don't want to end up dead in a remote desert valley!

If anyone wants to know how to really take a hard look at the problems of polygamy, check out this week's NPR series on it at All Things Considered.