» Be Fucked! The Quotes Thread Options

[Warden]

Good lines that involve fuck I have noticed,

Swearengen: "Get a fucking haircut. Looks like your mother fucked a monkey."

Tolliver: "Sayin' questions in that tone and pointin' your finger at me will get you told to fuck yourself."

And not involving fuck:

"Is that a fresh scalp I see hanging from your belt?"

[elkana]

Calamity Jane: “I'm calling on the widow and the little one in her care, and if I was you I wouldn't try to stop me."

EB Farnum: "Be brief."

Calamity Jane: "Be Fucked!"

EB Farnum: "Her gutter mouth, and the widow in an opium stupor. A conversation for the ages.”

There are so many great quotes in this show, one hardly knows where to begin!

ETA: Can't help myself, here's another...

Al Swearengen to Seth Bullock: "Here's my counteroffer to your counteroffer -- go fuck yourself.”

This post has been edited by elkana: Feb 1, 2005 @ 9:08 pm.

[tobey]

one hardly knows where to begin!

I think you got us off to a fine start.

[marleyfan]

Al saying "Wild Bill. Breaking my balls from the afterlife" has always cracked me up

[hcwoodward]

For two weeks now, I've been giggling about Al's "You better have a payin’ dwarf underneath you."

This post has been edited by hcwoodward: Feb 2, 2005 @ 12:18 am.

[bluedahlia]

Ahh while nearly every line of dialogue belongs in this thread one of my personal favs is this lovely snarky exchange between Cy And Al lookin down upon the hoopleheads

Al: “Sometimes I wish we could just hit 'em over the head, rob 'em, and throw their bodies in the creek."
Cy: "But that would be wrong. ”

[painter]

Al, to Wu: "I sure am glad I taught you that word."

[rosjaq]

My favorite Al quote of Season 1:

"God rest the souls of that poor family... and pussy's half price for the next 15 minutes."

[prostiturtle]

Doc should have won an emmy for this scene alone. Too bad it was in the finale, and just a week or two too late to qualify. Maybe next year.

Doc: If was a more adaptable primate or one of your regular petitioners, I suspect I wouldn’t feel this pain. I guess I—I’d have a wad of cartilage covering the patella, protecting me from this—this discomfort.
Jesus Christ.
Jesus Christ, Just Please, God.
Take that Minister.
What conceivable Godly use is his protracted suffering to you? What conceivable Godly use? What conceivable Godly use was the screaming of all those men? Did you, did you need to hear their death agonies to know your—your omnipotence? Mama! Mother find my arm! Mommy! Mommy! Mommy they—they shot my leg off it hurts so bad. It hurts so bad.
Admitting my understanding’s imperfection, trusting that you have a purpose, praying that you consider it served, I beg you to relent. Thy Will Be Done, Amen.

[humblepie]

Ah, I wish I could remember if this is right! When Al asks Jewel about going to see Doc, and she replies, "I'm knocked up"-- cracks me up every time.

(A question for the Mods, to satisfy my own curiosity: how much can we quote from the show?)

[empty2]

Calamity Jane, as she's being harrassed in the street, "What are you? A fuckin' Adonis?" That one translates surprisingly well in real life situations.

[mickeyjace]

Al has so many classic quotes, it's hard to choose but this is definitely one of my favs:
“Get the fuck out of here, doc. I'm working on my deployments and flanking maneuvers.”
Any line delivered by CJ is classic. I loved the "Be fucked".

This post has been edited by mickeyjace: Feb 2, 2005 @ 12:42 pm.

[Janie1130]

Smallpox victim . . . "I apologize. I apologize."

CJ . . . "SHUT THE FUCK UP!"

[prostiturtle]

One of my Al favorites:

Al: Yeah. Strange, huh, Miles, but – something ya gotta know about specialists – they pay a premium, and they never cause fuckin’ trouble. Sometimes I imagine in my declining years runnin’ a small joint in Manchester, England, catering to specialists exclusive. And to let ‘em know they’re amongst their own, maybe I’ll operate from the corner, hanging upside down like a fuckin’ bat, hmm? Oh, we’re not such bad sorts here, huh Miles?

And this classic exchange, makes me chuckle every time:

Sol: Our stock’s depleted, but we are offering a 100% discount on any item that catches your eye.
Trixie: I’ve got money.
Sol: Our special get-acquainted-with-those-we’d-like-to-get-acquainted-with sale…

And the line without the line. When poor Johnny, without a voice, tries to explain who he's looking for to Doc and puts his thumbs and his index fingers together to form a triangle over his crotch, and Doc simply says "Trixie?"

[michelec]

Doc (when asking CJ to help run the pest tent): "You can do all your drinking during non-work hours like I do."